does erwin's character ever make you really sad. like, i think about him all the time, and i just don't see a way that he's ever going to be happy, like there's no possible way he's going to have a happy ending. i dunno, what are your thoughts on it?
yeah, erwin makes me sadder than any snk character tbh and its because he’s not only had a rough upbringing but the theme of most of his personal tragedy si that he sees it as self-inflicted; like he believes its his fault that his father was tortured and killed by the CMPs, and the nature of his job is people losing their lives on HIS orders. erwin is up to his ass in guilt; he’s basically sacrificed almost every opportunity for personal happiness not only so that he can help advance humanity’s fight against the titans but because, in part, I personally think he’s punishing himself.
he lost his dad, saw the girl he loved go off with his best friend who left him to join the MPs, he hasn’t married because he doesn’t know when he’ll die, he’s probably seen more friends and comrades die to the titans than is reasonable, and now he’s responsible for making the calls that result in those deaths. erwin basically has the entire weight of the fucking human race on his shoulders and he voluntarily sacrifices pieces of himself and others in order to keep humanity from falling into fucking oblivion.
and he’s more tragic to me than someone like levi because he has more responsibility and accountability for the horrible realities of war and command, not only personally but publicly too. levi gets the hailed titled of “humanitys strongest” and is like a superhero to the people whereas erwin is the cold and rutheless commander who has no soul left lmao. and as a result of this and probably just as a means of coping, erwin has to be more emotionally closed off than anyone, including levi. I swear to god we actually know SO little about who erwin actually is as a person because he is in dedicated, ruthless commander mode almost 24/7. its only been in the uprising arc that we’ve seen him actually crack open a little bit and we find out he’s actually a ridiculously guilt-ridden, self-doubting, melancholic, vulnerable as all hell guy who has been through so much that he was fucking relieved that he was about to go to his death
he didnt know that anka was going to burst in with the lie about the titan invasion, he didnt know zackley or pixis had coordinated a plan to intervene; erwin just knew that the gamble didnt pay off and had been told he was being taken to the gallows and this is his reaction.
ERWIN MAKES ME SO FUCKING SAD, I CANT STAND IT, HE NEVER HAD OR GAVE HIMSELF THE OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE PERSONAL HAPPINESS BECAUSE HE’S A STUPID SELF-SACRIFICING DUTIFUL LOSER NERD WHO’S JUST DOING HIS BEST AND TURNING HIMSELF INTO THE MONSTER THAT IS NEEDED TO FIGHT THE TITANS ON EQUAL FOOTING.
When I was first playing Animal Crossing on GameCube back in like 2004 I hated one of the villagers (Portia) because she was really rude and obnoxious so I sent her a letter that just said “Fuck you!” bc I was in middle school and a rebel and then about a year later after my mom had started playing Animal Crossing she was talking to Portia who decided to show my mom this “really nice letter” she’d received from me and guess who got in trouble