I love people’s writing about perfume, because it’s forced to be so creative. Scent is hard to talk about, so people have to resort to stories and metaphors, all of them intensely personal to the writer.
And when they don’t like a perfume, that creativity gives forth some of the best insults. I have here curated my favorites from Perfumes: The Guide by Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez. The list is long, but trust me, they’re all worth reading.
A disclaimer: The same thing that makes perfume reviews fun to read also makes them super subjective. I have never found less of a consensus on anything than on perfume. In other words, if you find your favorite perfume on this list, please don’t take it personally (and don’t blame me- I haven’t smelled most of these myself!)