Albus Severus Potter
Sirius: *jumping up and down* Is it a boy? Is it a boy?
James: Pads, it just came out of the red head mate. Literally a second ago. It’s a potato at this stage.
Lily: *screaming* IT’S A BOY!
Sirius: OOOOOH wee little Remus is born.
Remus: *rolls his eyes* You don’t know that Sirius.
James: No he will want to have the whole package, he’s Remus.
Lily: I hope it’s Remus, he’ll be a well-behaved, smart kid then. James Sirius is a nightmare, he’s like you two combined, I didn’t think that was possible to be honest, I thought if your personalities encountered it would explode but here we are.
*James and Sirius high-five*
Remus: I’m very honoured that you guys think he would name him after me but you forget there’s already a Remus in Harry’s family: Teddy.
Sirius: Fuck that. He doesn’t use it, this one would.
James: He’s right, it’s gonna be awesome. If we get a Lily next time we’ll have everyone.
Lily: Everyone except Marlene, Mary–
Sirius: *smiling* Marlene would rather shoot herself in the head before she lets anyone name their kid after her.
James: Besides Harry didn’t know them, love.
Lily: Yeah you are right, I wish he did.
*Harry names the kid Albus
Snivellus Severus Potter*
Sirius: Is this a fucking joke to you Harry? Is it?
James: Lils? Tell me he didn’t name my bloody grandson after my arch enemy. Tell me he is fucking with us.
Lily: Oh no I’m pretty sure he did.
Remus: Told you guys it wasn’t going to be Remus.
Sirius: *face-palming* You did but I thought that it was one of your “I’m not good enough for this” shit.
Remus: No, I am good enough for this shit, I just knew he wouldn’t name him after me.
James: How did this happen?
Sirius: At least one of them could have been sensible you know. I will call him Snivellus Jr.
Lily: *points a finger at Sirius* No you won’t.
Remus: Don’t talk about sensible names. Your name is Sirius Orion. You as a whole, including your name, are not sensible.
Sirius: Your name is Werewolf McWerewolf, so shut the fuck up.
Lily: What’s up with wizards and weird names any ways?
James: It’s meant to show that we are different than Muggles, that we are somehow superior because we are, for example, named after constellations. *Sirius stares, James grins* It’s just an example Pads. Anyways my parents didn’t like that idea so my name is very sensible.
Sirius: *Lily stares at Sirius* Mommy dearest was an interesting person, don’t ask. Can we go back to the fact that Harry named his son ALBUS SEVERUS?
Remus: There’s not much you can do about it.
James: I find comfort in the fact that he’ll use Albus.
Sirius: I’m afraid if the next one is a girl, he’ll call him Narcissa or something.
Lily: Don’t be so dramatic about this.
Remus: You sometimes forget that you are talking to Sirius.
Lily: Oh, my bad.
James: So, how long will they wait before the next one?
James: What? They are not getting any younger. I mean they can have 7 children and form their own Quidditch team and–
James: I trust red head on this.