i am a studyblr, i am a student, but i am not a study
machine. yet here i sit, overworked; physically, mentally, and emotionally
exhausted. still, i’m driven to continue, all for the wrong reasons, by
pressure and expectations, by deadlines and the fear of falling behind.
my back aches from having sat hunchbacked over
textbooks and a notebook for the last ten or so hours, the only breaks i took
were for lunch and dinner. there’s a red, sore dent on my fourth finger of my right
hand, the same hand that has been struggling to present a consistent ‘neat’
handwriting for the last few years. the dent is the only calloused part on my
hand. i wonder when it’ll give in.
i don’t think i’m the only one who goes through this. studyblrs everywhere, putting the best version of them on show, the productive
side of them, the motivated side. classmates, students, getting excited over a good
grade, sending snapchats of them studying. but does anybody
come out to speak about when they hit a mental wall?
everybody feels the need to show that they are perfect, to show that they have
absolutely zero problems. somehow, in this world where we all are sure to face
problems of our own, it’s almost taboo to reveal them.
but i’m telling you, it’s okay.
this is the raw me.
i am tired of having to always show the best side of me.
i am a studyblr, i am a student, and i am tired of
Sick of the lack of signal. Sick of the lack of touch. Sick of the static voice. It’s not enough, it’s not enough. Baby it’s hard to be just what you need when all I speak is static screams. Can you hear me?