so, to be blunt, the clique sucks. not all of you, no, but a majority of the clique sucks. a lot of us lack respect, not only for tyler and josh, but for other artists, bands, and their fanbase, such as melanie martinez and the crybabies. (the melanie hate was very very strong on the clique amino app)
i know i’m not being any better than they are now, by ranting about all this, but i NEED to get it off my chest.
let’s start off with the whole fake fan thing. there is no such thing as a ‘fake fan’! only NEW fans! if you meet someone who only knows the radio hits, introduce them to more songs! back when i first got into tøp, i bought a blurryface shirt with lane boy lyrics on it, despite only listening to the song a few times and i hadn’t memorized EVERY word. i wore it to church one night and a clique member ran up to me and busted out rapping the whole song and i got pretty freaked out! i told her that i’d only listened to the song maybe three times and she rolled her eyes, called me a fake fan, and left me alone with my little emo eyeliner and my little emo self. it hurt me, because she was degrading me in the fanbase for not knowing all the words to lane boy.
next let’s talk about faking suicide. that’s OBVIOUSLY not okay. suicide is a very, very serious thing that shouldn’t be joked about. i see it happen within the clique all the time, both real suicides and fake, and both hurt me very badly. but in different ways. do you realize how many people you’re hurting by faking your own death, all for attention? tyler isn’t going to write a song about you, you know, because you “died”.
now the address leaking, ah, the address leaking. that’s tyler and jenna’s personal life and their privacy. they had JUST moved into this new house! they must have felt so unsafe in their own home, which is supposed to be a place of comfort and protection from all you crazy, rabid fans trying to rip his clothes and steal his shoes. how safe would you feel if someone leaked your address online for the whole world to see?
next we have the crashed wedding. that whole thing was so, so disrespectful. that was josh’s friend’s wedding. if you were famous, and went to your friend’s big special day, and a fan decided to break in in the middle of it just to get a picture with you, would you feel annoyed or upset? because in the picture the girls took with him, josh looked pretty pissed. and josh has the right to say “no” to anybody who wants a picture with him. he doesn’t have to do whatever you say, your wish isn’t his command, and that goes for tyler too. ever wonder why they walk fast in public, and why tyler started hearing hoods and baseball caps to cover his face lately? to hide from us.
the crap with the crybabies. it’s nuts. y'all are making nasty comments about melanie’s appearance, and personally, i think mel is a very beautiful young woman. the real ugly people are the ones who made fun of her and her fans, they’re ugly on the inside. it isn’t right. i know that you would all feel awful if someone told you that your tooth gap was the 8th wonder of the world or made rude comments on your eyebrows. mel is a human being, and so are all of her fans, so start treating them with respect. because EVERY human deserves respect.
i understand why the clique is so hated. we’re mostly made up of awful people. i feel bad for tyler and josh because they deserve better fans than us. they deserve respectful, thoughtful people that wait patiently for new music instead of rabid, rude kids who spam their social media accounts, pretty much harassing them and pressuring them into releasing new music, commenting “i love you” constantly on their posts, and invading their personal lives and their privacy.
that’s it. that’s all i have to say. the clique sucks and i’m pretty ashamed that i even called myself a clique member. until you all clean up your act, i’m not one of you. i’m not a part of the clique anymore, i’m simply someone who listens to tøp. i’m just a fan. i refuse to identify as part of this madhouse called the skeleton clique. feel free to rb and rant about it yourself. i’m done
Some things about Kravitz, who hasn’t lived in the world (or in general) for a little while:
Kravitz has a really strange perception of time, because he’s gotten used to ignoring the overall passage of time as much as possible. If it’s an appointment, with a scheduled time and place that he can write down on a calendar (say, a date), Kravitz is always prompt. If it’s a more general timeframe (say, meeting his boyfriend and his boyfriend’s favorite child at the zoo in two hours), he might be several hours or days either late or early. It’s impossible to predict in what specific way he will misunderstand the timing next.
Kravitz has fallen out of the habit of eating by the time he meets Taako. It’s not necessary, and he has better things to do with his time than indulge in sentimental habits from life, he thinks. He has no idea what to order on that first dinner date; he doesn’t even remember what foods he used to like. When Taako finds out, he pushes himself to cook more because he wants to see the look on Kravitz’ face when he tastes Taako’s cooking (Taako doesn’t always manage it, but he tries more than he used to). Kravitz can’t handle spicy food but he eats it anyway (it’s familiar and like home and if he could eat it in his first life he wants to have it again in his second) and discovers that he has a deep and obsessive love of sweets. Taako experiments with a recipe for a spiced cake, and Kravitz eats almost the whole thing while simultaneously smiling and crying. (It tastes so much like something he can’t name.)
Kravitz isn’t very good at small talk. He doesn’t know what to talk about besides work, and when he talks about work people start to look at him strangely. He falls into the habit of just following Taako around at whatever party they attend and letting his boyfriend do most of the talking. He prefers the smaller family gatherings; Taako’s family is a busy, loud, chaotic group, and they draw Kravitz into their conversations and activities like he’s meant to be there. (Of course you’re meant to be there, people keep telling him. You’re part of the family, wouldn’t be the same without you.) Kravitz doesn’t know when he starts depending on all of them, just that one day he realizes that he trusts them in a way he never expected to. His trust isn’t misplaced - he’s at a party and people are asking uncomfortable questions, and Lup interrupts with a loud and gleeful recounting of the way she decapitated a necromancer to the suddenly-horrified onlookers. Barry helps Kravitz make his escape during the distraction.
Kravitz likes to be warm. He realizes how much he enjoys the feeling when he’s cuddling with Taako one night; it feels like home, like something he hasn’t felt in a long time. Once he’s mostly living in the Prime Material Plane, he gravitates towards warmth whenever possible. The house he and Taako eventually share has a big fireplace with an armchair right next to it, and Kravitz acquires an enormous collection of sweaters. He likes to sit out in the sun. He frequently invades Taako’s personal space to leech warmth from him; Taako gets used to the sudden and freezing (and loving) embrace of death.
Kravitz sometimes forgets to put on his face in the morning before he answers the door for people. It’s fine when it’s friends or family, but they’ve been through a few mail couriers and scouts selling cookies. Taako cackles with delight every time; Kravitz is always embarrassed.
Kravitz gets unreasonably excited when he discovers “new things.” His family patiently indulges his enthusiasm about such up-and-coming trends as fantasy slap bracelets, fantasy glow sticks, and fantasy snuggies.
Kravitz never gets tired of finding new music, and there is so much new music to find, with so muchtime now to listen. He’s obsessed with another song every week, and it’s not unusual to hear music trickling from the window day or night. Sometimes, when Kravitz unexpectedly finds a familiar piece of music that he didn’t know he’d forgotten, he’ll dance with Taako around the kitchen or living room like he hasn’t since that first life that he can barely remember.
Hospital Jargon (as explained by an American floor nurse)
Writing something that takes place in a hosptial? Consider this list of phrases to add a sense of realism:
Report/ in report: When one nurse hands their patients off to another
“PACU can f*ck right off until 1930, we’re in report.”
Sign-Out: When one doctor/resident hands their patients off to another
*returning page* “Are they dying? I’ve barely gotten sign-outhere”
EPIC- Electronic charting system. Literally any electronic charting system. Does not have to be Hyperspace/supplied by the EPIC corporation to be called this.
“Hey, could you put those vitals in EPIC for me since you’re already logged in?”
Bed 45/46-2/47-1/48/etc…: how we refer to patients, by their bedspace number, denoted “room-bed”.
“Hey Nikki, do you remember what 45-2′s blood sugar was?”
Assignment: The patients any one particular medical professional has responsibility for- be they a nurse, doctor, aide, respiratory therapist, physical therapist, etc…
“My assignment is rooms 43-45, how about you?”
The Board: Where the status of the patients on your floor get
listed, including who is to be discharged, who has certain needs, and the day’s expected admissions. Used to be a physical white board, but now is electronic. Usually used to talk about how
many patients a floor is about to admit.
“Jeeze, did you see they just put four new patients on our board? We’ve already got 16- call the nursing supervisor.”
Flexed up: Taking more patients than you’re staffed for on a floor
“Well, we’re staffed for 15, but they ‘found’ three more bedspaces so they’re flexing us up tonight.”
Code/Call a code/They’re coding: A Code Blue. When a patient’s heart stops on The Floor and everyone shows up to practice CPR and transfer them to The Unit.
“They’re coding, get a crash cart to 75-2 and call a code blue”
Rapid/Call a rapid/Rapid response team:
Almost a code, but their heart is still beating. For hospitals who have
a separate “Rapid Response” nursing team. Two Crit Care nurses show up
and handle things. Also who you call if you and everyone else on your floor can’t get an IV.
“They have an INR of 9.5 and the doc doesn’t want to do anything- I’m gonna call a rapid.”
Float/they’re floating you: When you don’t have enough patients on your floor so the nursing supervisor sends you to a different, unfamiliar one.
“They’re making me float to 9C. Again. Can you believe that??”
Full: Can’t take any more patients, either due to physical space or nursing staff.
“Tell the nursing supervisor to stop putting patients on our board- we’re full”
Clinic: Outpatient. Where you want your patients to be.
“Tell them we’ll see them in Clinic in three days. They have no medical need to be here anymore and they know it.”
KINDS OF PATIENTS:
Contacts/isolations: Any patients who’s rooms you have to don a gown, gloves, mask, and/or respirator to enter.
“Are you sh*tting me? I have five patients today and four of them are isolations.”
Frequent flyer- Someone who, for medical or social reasons, just can’t seem to stay out of the hospital
“Did you hear Darlene is back?” “Yeah, we’re officially engraving her name on the Frequent Flyer wall of fame”
Crump/Crumpy/Crumper: Colloquial term for patients who are medically
unstable/at a lower level of care than they need/will be transferred to
The Unit when a bed becomes available or when the inevitably code,
whichever comes first.
“73′s a crumper if I’ve ever seen one. Rapid’s in there working her now.”
‘Seeker: Someone in the hospital with their own agenda, but who largely has no medical need to be there and will threaten to sign out AMA (even though they’ve been discharged four times and keep refusing to go) if they don’t get what they want- be it drugs, social interaction, or over-the-top waitressing. Will probably threaten to give a horrible review of the hospital on their social media platform of choice and mention you by name if they don’t get what they want.
“49′s a total seeker. When she’s not begging for pain meds, you’re getting her crackers, juice, tea, hot packs, cold packs, everything you could think of. I didn’t sit down all night and my other patients slept pretty much the whole night. Give her some percocet and get her the hell out of here before I have to deal with her again tonight.”
Heavy: A patient that takes up a disproportionate amount of your time, but usually for a legitimate reason.
“Dr. P’s patients are really heavy. Something’s always going on with them and they have tubes coming out of everywhere that need care of some kind every hour… I had two of his patients today and I’m so tired… could we break up the assignment for the next shift please?”
The Floor: Medical and Surgical floors, sometimes
specialty floors- basically anywhere that’s not the ED, Psych, or The
Unit. These have higher staffing ratios (more patients per nurse) and lower patient acuity than
“They didn’t really need a bed on the Unit so they were transferred to the Floor”
The Unit: The Intensive Care Unit. Where crumpy patients go,
comes in the following flavors (though smaller hospitals may have just
one): MICU (medical), SICU (surgical), PICU (pediatric), TICU (trauma),
NICU (neonatal), NICU (neurological), BICU (burn), and Stepdown (in the days after
an ICU discharge).
“They weren’t doing so hot, so we called a rapid and had them sent to The Unit.”
The ED: The Emergency Department. Oh dear lord it is not called the ER.
“They’re sending up that new admit from the ED in like 5 mins, do you have the room ready?”
PACU: Post Anesthesia Care Unit, where people are stabilized after surgery.
“PACU’s calling again, they’re backing up and need to give report.”
THE NURSING HIERARCHY:
Director of Nursing: One Nurse to rule them all. Directs all facets of nursing, from training to hiring to staffing to quality improvement.
Nursing Supervisor: One nurse to rule them all… on a given shift. The nursing
supervisor assigns patients to nursing units and makes sure everywhere
is staffed accordingly.
Nurse Manager: In charge of the general staffing and personnel management of a particular floor, including scheduling, patient satisfaction, staff development, and service recovery.
Charge Nurse/Charge: The “shift manager” of nursing. Has final say on a lot of things you don’t want to be the bad guy on, as well as creating assignments/checking the crash cart, and submitting service requests when the nurse manager isn’t there. Also has a patient assignment.
Staff nurse: The nurses who do assessments, pass meds, start IVs, carry out orders, give updates to doc’s, chart, manage a patient’s day, make sure they get to tests/procedures on time with the right paperwork, and are overall responsible for managing patient care and providing first-line response to issues that arise throughout the shift.
Nurse Aide/Nurse Tech: Provides the majority of basic patient care. Counts intake and output, gets blood sugars and vital signs, sets up rooms for new admits, cleans and clothes patients, gets blood and urine samples, transports patients if necessary. Staff nurses are responsible for this when aides/techs are not available.
Would someone please add the Medical Hierarchy if you know it? I don’t feel I know it well enough to do it justice. Thanks!
Charge me for my prescription and I’ll have your contract terminated.
Many years ago- My psychiatrist decided to retire and I had 60 days to find a new one to continue prescribing my PTSD meds. I found one that had immediate appointments and accepted my insurance. Great. I went to my first appointment, met the doc and immediately felt that something was wrong. He refused to discuss my PTSD but had no problem writing my Rx for my meds. I thought this was odd but I knew discontinued meds would result in a hell that I was not willing to live in. My appointment lasted about 10 minutes. I figured that I’d continue to see this doc while I searched for someone who would treat and not just prescribe. The wait time for new patients in that area seemed to be about 4 months for other providers so it was what it was. 6 weeks in, I lost my insurance. I needed my meds so I became a cash pay patient. The fee was $90 for the session and I was told that there was also a charge for the ex to be written which was $20. I was hesitant about the legality of this and made my concern known to the practice administration who advised me that as there was no insurance contract as a cash patient, they were permitted to charge such a fee.
By this time, my EOBS from my prior 6 sessions started to arrive in the mail.(Note- this was before EMR so everything was filed via paper and insurance companies had 30 days to pay the claim). I noticed that the the description of the services were for a time frame of 45-60 minutes. Bullshit. I called the prior insurance company and told them that this provider was not seeing me for that duration of time and they opened up a case with their fraud department. My understanding is that my file was reviewed along with the doc’s schedule of appointments and other stuff and it was concluded that this guy was basically running a pill mill, filing fraud claims, and ripping off his patients. Months later I got a reply from the insurance company that the providers contract was terminated with the insurance company.
I found our later on that his license was suspended (for other ethical violations) and shortly afterwards he was arrested for pushing pills on the side.
Obviously we knew Anti was on his way and this picture was quite a cool way to confirm that something big was coming.
We saw flashes of Anti reaching towards the camera and clawing at his neck and hair, screaming silently and all round losing his mind, desperate to get out and harm Jack throughout the FNAF: Sister Location as well as eventuall ‘leaking’ into other videos including ones that weren’t neccessarily Horror games.
He showed his impatience. His eagerness to emerge was evident all through October, using cryptic meassages in descriptions and changing the bio on tumblr and twitter frequently until the infamous day when he showed himself.
Fast forward to this
Quite a difference to the Anti from October. The recent flashes of Anti showed him still looking directly at the camera but he’s no longer tearing at his hair or shouting at us from within Jack. He knows how much power he has and he can afford to wait, using the audience to fuel him. He doesn’t have to put a lot of effort into making us talk. One word is all he needs to send us into a frenzy.
This is why I think it says “REBORN” in this picture:
This “new” Anti is a patient tactition. He’s learnt a lot since October, about Jack and ESPECIALLY about us. He’s still unpredictable, scattered and unhinged but now he knows how much he can make us lose our minds and is taking his time in doing so……
Disclaimer: Spiritual/Magickal Healing should NEVER replace mundane treatment. If you have a physical or mental illness or health issues see a professional. Always check mundane causes before jumping to spiritual conclusions.
Helper Orbs are a big part of my healing practice - they work well, do so on their own without me having to pay attention to them, and they don’t take much energy to create.
Helper orbs are, essentially, rather small balls of energy serving a specific purpose by being programmed to work in a specific way. If programmed correctly, they work on their own and only do what you told them to do. They can serve in multiple ways, including cleansing the energy, draining blockages, and regulating the energy flow. I will put a list with different kinds/purposes further down. They don’t need to be looked after all the time and can function on their own, even when the main healing has already been finished and the Healer isn’t present anymore.
How to create (+ use) Helper Orbs:
Make an Energy ball out of clean, neutral energy. Make it as big or small as you want, but remember to have it be appropriate to what it shall do. I ususally make them about the size of my fist or a little smaller and I have relatively small hands.
Fill it with healing and active energy.
Once that’s done, add energy with qualities that correspond with what you want the orb to do. Need a drain for blockages? Great, add banishing energy! Want one that cleans the energy? Add cleasing qualitites! And so forth. You can also colour the orb to correspond your intent, but it’s not needed.
Give it an energy source, where it can draw its energy to function from. That can be an element, yourself, an object, the patient, anything.Be sure to always ask for consent if it’s not yourself.
Now comes the most important part: The programming. Break the purpose down to its most simple form - the more straightforward, the better. * Focus all your intent and visualize the process of the finished orb working. Let it all pour down through you and into the orb, secure it there.
Finish it up by firmly programming it so that it automatically disappears once it’s not needed anymore/its job is done.
Put the finished orb where it is needed. Secure it there.
Be aware here that in some cases more complicated constructions are needed, but generally speaking general purposes are good: They ensure that nothing is accidentially missed.
Types of Helper Orbs
This is not a comprehensive list. These are only some examples.
1.Drains. Drains (already mentioned in this post) do pretty much what the name says they do: They drain. They operate similar to a black hole by sucking blockages, negative energy, excess energy, … in and thus removing it from the system.
2. “Traffic Lights”. Regulator Helper Orbs, or “Traffic Lights” as I like to call them, regulate the energy flow by slowing it down, speeding it up, holding it, etc. While this might not make the patient feel better immediately, they help to get the energy flow back to normal. These are useful when a big chunk of energy had to be removed, same with a bigger blockage, a parasite, or when the energy channels got mixed and/or messed up. They sort out the mess by organizing the energy flow until it is ready to healthily flow on its own again.
3. Refreshers. Refresher Orbs function like those Water Diffusers that you can buy to put more moisture into the air, just with Energy. They “breathe” out cleansing energy and help diffuse heavy and thick energy that weighs one down as well as cools down heated energy.
4. Energy Sources. Energy Sources offer the patient new energy to work with. These are especially useful if there’s a lack of energy, a hole to fill, etc. These will continuously offer new, neutral and/or healing energy to make up for an apparent lack until there’s not more needed. These shouldn’t stay for low-energy people due to taking so much energy from their source but only stay around until the extraordinary lack is filled again. Remember that these can often take more energy from their source than some other types.
5. Repairers. Repairers are most useful when closing open wounds. They’ll stay around until it is closed and will provide it with healing energy that quickens the closing process up.
Hopefully this helped someone! If you have any questions feel free to drop by.
September 2017: I’m moving my HUGE rec list onto this account. I CONSTANTLY AM UPDATING THIS POST WITH NEW RECS BTW JUST TO KEEP THINGS IN ORDER.
September 25 2015: Recently I’ve been getting back into Hey Arnold! (again…) and with
all the hype about Nick dropping some heavy clues that our long wait for
the jungle movie or just any news at all for the ending we all know Hey
Arnold! Needs and deserves well I couldn’t help it but get back to
reading fanfiction again!Now now … lately I’ve been complaining a
lot about the bad fanfiction I’ve been reading and how little rec lists
there are since the fandom is sorta tiny so I decided to make a rec
list of fanfictions that won’t make you wanna cringe!So I might
as well get this one out of the way, since most of the fandom has read
it and it’s one of those “fanfiction the entire fandom knows about” but
I’m sure there’s a few people here and there that haven’t read it and
the story is of course, the amazing,
Oh no-it seems Arnold needs a little help with his poetry assignment if
he wants a decent grade in English!Hmm, I wonder what fourth grade poet
laurete Mr.Simmons could assign to help him out…Set postconfession to
make things even more fun
What could be more amusing than taking two hundred thousand words to
make Arnold realize he loves Helga? Taking EIGHT hundred thousand words
to explore in detail how this newfound relationship is working out!
Sequel to Tutoring Arnold! Let’s do this!
a girl is known for being strong, it can tear her apart to be looked at
with pity. Helga Pataki, an 18 year old girl, had a part of herself
stolen from her one night and ever since then, she lost herself. She was
ready to give her life up, until someone reached a helping hand out for
her. Arnold wouldn’t let her fall, especially not when someone else was
going down with her.
figured that Arnold was drunk enough to not remember anything, and she
was drunk enough to think it was a good idea. But she’ll soon find out
that what they’d done that night isn’t going to be a secret for long.
Very Slight AU.
brought it up first. Just because she was hopelessly in love with
Arnold didn’t mean she’d risk any chance of being exposed. She’d never
suggest something as crazy as being Friends With Benefits. Oh, no, this
was all his fault because he brought it up first.
Love is like a baseball bat. It’s used as a weapon if needed. It’s
something you hold close to you, something to be used with all of your
strength. You have to fight to get a decent swing, just like the good
relationships are worth fighting for
Teenage Helga gets a letter from a long lost friend.
July 25 2016:
I said a few
days but it’s actually been months…
Anyway this is
probably the longest fanfic rec list yet
I’ve read A LOT of
fanfiction since the last list and I want to share the gems I’ve found with
Some of these
are incomplete and some are ongoing, basically if it’s been over a year since
the last update I will mark it as INCOMPLETE.
Instead of me
getting all crazy over how much I love these fics like I did the first time, I
will be posting the original summary. This list will be long and I will
probably repeat myself since I do love all these fics.
It would be a daunting enough task to
tutor the weird girl with the bizarre hair and bizarre fashion sense even if
you had never actually met her. It was downright scary to tutor that girl and
know that, at least once, she had been in love with you. A/H
Arnold and Helga make a deal: If she can
help him get a date with the girl of his dreams by coaching him in romance,
then he has to accompany her to formal dinner as her date. However, a lot can
change in two months time. Will Helga be able to handle helping Arnold woo another
woman? And if Arnold does get what he wants, will he still want what he gets?
While on a road trip to Vancouver with
Gerald, Phoebe and Arnold, Helga decides to torment Arnold during the trip but
what happens when things heats up…could things change their normal
relationship into something more?
Helga had always made it her personal
mission to keep her love for Arnold a secret. She’d never ever thought that
someone would overhear her monologging about him! And this guy was ready to
demand absolutely awkward, terrifying and embarrassing things from Helga in
exchange for not telling her secret to anyone.
At sixteen, while on an extended visit in
Hillwood, Arnold not only reconnects with his friends and old times, but also,
having to battle his ongoing sexual desires regarding Helga. As for Helga, she
too is facing the same struggle.
Most people would argue that Arnold is a
saint of nature. Lady Luck is not always on his side though and one day, while
playing baseball, he hits the ball so hard it flies through the window to
Madame Blanche’s store. The gypsy does not take it lightly and puts a curse on
him. Soon he starts acting weird around his peers; especially around a certain
He was sick, he had to be. How else could
he explain the fire inside him every time she smirked at him or teased him,
this constant need to defeat her? Ever since that kiss on the rofftop it was
like something inside him snapped, she occupied his every thought, consumed him
even in his dreams. He didn’t know who he was anymore and it was all her fault.
Fate, in the form of Arnold, collapses
onto a twenty-five year old Helga G. Pataki’s front step as she runs late for
work one fine summer’s day - effectively turning her life upside down and then
stomping on it for good measure.
When Helga came home one night after a
party, she thought that Arnold was in pain because of the whimpering noises
coming from his bedroom. What she discovered when she barged in, left her in
complete shock and… fascination?
“You’re bored with
her, aren’t you?” the strange girl asked me. I wanted to tell her that
Lila was perfect for me. I had fought for her attention for years and now she
was finally my girlfriend, but it felt like I was still trying to win her
heart. Something was missing and that something could be this excitement I felt
whenever I looked in the blue eyes of this strange girl.
“I told you I was trouble with my
bad behavior.” he said to me as he pushed me up against the wall, claiming
my lips in a breathtaking kiss. I, Helga G. Pataki, has officially fallen for a
bad boy, something I thought I was too smart to ever do. He is sugar-coated
misery, a devil in disguise and a snake with green eyes. I guess it’s karma…
I have bad behavior too.
Arnold and Helga are set up on a blind date
by their best friends in an attempt to get them out of their depression. After
not speaking to each other for nearly two years, old wounds are reopened and
secrets are revealed on a night neither will forget.
never understood the appeal of Helga until age 19. He should have felt
bad for sleeping with his ex’s best friend/best friend’s ex-girlfriend,
but he didn’t. He always knew he’d never be her happy ending, but that
didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.
After FTi Helga confesses her love to
Arnold, who sadly doesn’t feel the same way. Now Arnold is running Hillwood
High’s newspaper, and dating Lila. As an act of revenge, Helga becomes the
mysterious advice columnist ‘Geraldine.’
“Have you ever watched someone die?
It’s awful I have watched her die so many times if I do one more time I won’t
survive” Arnold is stuck in the same day and no matter what he does it
keeps repeating. Can he make it stop? Can he change the future?
Spanish 2 with Arnold was fun until a
class presentation changes everything. When he leaves to chase his dreams &
find his parents in the middle of the San Lorenzo jungle, it’s Helga who is
left behind with the secret she was never able to tell. But will a surprising
video call from Arnold months later change her life forever?
the best night of both of their lives
become the most tragic and ironic as Arnold pops the big question but after
getting hit by a drunk driver he forgets his love for Helga. He remembers how
much he hated Helga and how much Helga hated him. Will Helga have to start from
square one or will his memory come back? would she have to give up the only
thing she cares about most?
“I’ve never felt sorry for you,
Helga. And no one ever should.” Helga’s life has never been easy, but at
the peak of her high school completion, she suddenly finds herself homeless and
with less friends than fingers. Can she save herself and make her dreams come
A smile came to his face, and he said nothing,
just continued to admire her, how beautiful and soft she was, in the afterglow
of pleasure. “I guess studying on more important things was worth it,
After Helga witnesses her fiancé killing
someone she goes to police and discovers just how little she knew about him. He
is connected to the biggest crime ring in the East Coast. After giving her
statement she learns she must go under police protection and is shocked when
she finds out the FBI agent assigned to protect her is her old crush, Arnold
When Helga sees Bob slap Miriam late one
night, she runs away and finds herself on Arnold’s doorstep. Her emotions are
running too high to keep under wraps, and Arnold begins to see another side of
Helga that he never thought existed.
The first time I saw her, she was naked.
The first time I met her, she recognized me. The first time she kissed me was
the first time I was kissed at all. This girl would change my summer and I knew
it from the moment my eyes met hers. There exists many bad ways of meeting the
girl of your dreams, but the way I met Helga Geraldine Pataki takes the cake.
After years of confusion and hiding her
feelings from Arnold, Helga has finally become the object of Arnold’s
affections. The catch? Nobody knows, and they intend to keep it that way- at
least for now. But will an unexpected school group project prove to be their
I spent more than five years trying to
forget the greatest heartbreak of my life. I grew up, moved in with Olga, and
tried to figure out what I was going to do with my life. So of all the coffee
shops in the city, why did he have to come to mine?
Many have different perspectives on how
life is defined. Some would say lovely, complicated, treacherous, passionate
even. But whether the thoughts be pleasant, cherishing its value, or bitter
enduring its harsh realities, from my experience I’ve found this fact to be
true…that life is short. So my story begins…
Since Arnold had stayed in San Lorenzo
six years ago, sixteen-year-old Helga always sleep walked to the boarding house
and slept in his bed, hoping she’d wake up next to him. She didn’t expect one
morning to actually wake up to her very beloved next to her.
Arnold volunteers to Stage Manager the
school play “My Fair Lady” in order to get an extra activity for
college apps. However, working under Helga as acting director isn’t the best
job one could ask for. But Arnold has an escape - his online IM partner. But
when he discovers the blogs owner, adjusting to what he sees against what he
reads can be hard. Which version to believe?
Arnold, now 17, has always been left
wondering who Cecile was. So when an odd girl who knows who Cecile is moves into
the Sunset Arms, Arnold might finally get some answers. At least, as long as
his new found feelings for Helga don’t get in the way.
Helga and Arnold are stuck in Anatomy
class discussing sex ed. Things get awkward when the instructor makes everyone
put condoms on bananas and the class gets a little rowdy. Time for confession
He’d sort of already known what was
coming, truth be told, when he questioned Helga on the roof of FTi. But then
again, he hadn’t really known at all. Some puzzles are too preposterous to
solve on ones own.
Arnold reflects his feelings about what
had happened on the fated day upon the FTi rooftop. After some pretty good
advice, and taking the time to think it all over, he decides to get it all out
and have a good talk with Helga about it.
Based on the adorable Disney & Pixar
movie WALL-E, follow along with our hero, the lovable and curious Arnold as he
goes from his life as a trash collector, to find out what he is truly meant for
upon meeting the beautiful search scout Helga.
“You’ve been in love with me since
we were three and treated me like shit ever since. I let you because I knew
deep down you didn’t mean it.” When the confrontation comes it is not
planned and what occurs is a surprise to all.
July 27 2017:
ALRIGHTY GUYS TIME TO UPDATE THE LIST! I WILL BE UPDATING THIS SPECIFIC POST FROM NOW ON TO KEEP THIS IN ORDER ON A SINGLE POST.
I never thought life without Olga would cause so many problems for me.
After all, out of everybody I knew, I was probably the only one with
just cause enough to want her gone. But now that she was, everything was
up in the air, including my relationship with Arnold. Could a view from
Mighty Pete shed light on what I’d lost? Or help me lose Arnold
Being in love for the first time is never easy, but to Arnold, it’s
downright torment. Not only has he been in love with her his whole life,
not only is she his best friend; she hates and distrusts men with her
entire being. He is the only exception, but how much of an exception is
he really? Can he win over the girl whose heart has turned to stone by
the men in her life?
After ten long years in San Lorenzo, Arnold suddenly returns to
Hillwood, throwing Helga’s world into chaos irreversibly. Gerald and
Phoebe start acting suspicious about his return; what secrets does he
bring with him, and what does it mean for Helga? Can she get him to
stay? Does she want him to stay? And how does Lila, mysteriously absent
for years, factor into his return?
The hottest thing on television is a teen drama called "Ever After”.
It’s fresh, it’s raw, and it’s popular in the Shortman household. The
problem is, the story might be a little less fiction and a little more
waking up in the hospital, a 26 year old Helga lands herself in rehab
for drug and alcohol abuse. Bob wants her cleaned up but while she’s
there, Gerald begins to dig into the past and brings out a skeleton in
her closet that has haunted them both. And what exactly does all of this
have to do with Arnold anyway?
“So… Arnold had cheated
on his girlfriend. My man Arnold. Cheated. On his girlfriend. But it was
the way that he said it that really interested me: he just said it. It
was a statement to him, not a confession, or a heart-wrenching admission
of guilt. He said it the same way he’d tell me he was out of sugar.”
Helga Pataki- 26, now settled in almost every sense of the word: a
steady job, a kid and a house- kind of, really doesn’t think she
qualifies as certifiably crazy anymore. That is- until she kidnaps
Arnold Shortman’s children. By accident. Sort of.
Trouble always seemed to find Arnold, especially if that trouble was
Helga Pataki. After a fierce mud fight at a school trip, Arnold was
forced to head back to shower. Helga was also left behind in order to
change so when the rusty pipes gave out and left Arnold blind with his
own shampoo who else could save him than the girl who had put him in
this predicament to begin with?
Acting had in many ways been one of Helga’s many skills. Arnold hadn’t
expected her to give a shot at a career in it though thereby leaving
Hillwood to study abroad just when he had started to grow feelings for
her. That smidge of love has turned into bitter resentment, so when the
play Helga is cast in as the heroine is falling apart, can Arnold ignore
the past pain and save it?
“-My leg is killing me!” She howled, “Crimeny it hurts!” At that, the young man paused and squinted very closely at his victim. “H-Helga?” He asked. Helga pried her eyes open and stared at him with a furrowed scowl, “Football head!” She barked. Of course! Who else would bowl her over but Arnold Shortman! Arnold freakin’ Shortman.
The Elevator by American HOT Fender
It certainly wasn’t how Helga Shortman had planned to spend her day. Trapped in an 8x7 space with her soon to be ex-husband. 1 elevator, 2 people, 6 hours. Will they kill each other or rekindle their love?
As Arnold begins his biggest adventure - growing up - he finds that the things he used to find easy and simple become more and more complicated and the people he used to have certain slots for in life… well, maybe they just don’t fit in easily definable boxes the way he always thought. It’s hard to tell if the world is getting bigger, or if he’s just feeling, hearing and seeing more of it than before.
Can you pleeeease do a fic of the "i'll always be the rain cloud to your sunshine"? I think you are the best person to write it!
You are absolutely not the only person to have given me this prompt and I love it SO much 🙊 I even think I maaay have written it in a Bechloe one-shot months ago but I don’t have time to find it this morning before work so here we gooooo. Thanks anon ❤️ *edit - it’s now late afternoon here and I’ve spent this morning before work and the longest lunch break I’ve ever been allowed to have since starting this job, writing this one-shot so I hope you guys enjoy 🤗*
Chloe stepped into the apartment she shared with Fat Amy and Beca, tugging her suitcase through the door behind her. She let out a happy sigh. Sure, she’d stayed behind in France for a week longer than the other Bellas, but nothing beat finally being home.
Chicago has spoilt her rotten over the past week. Taken her on posh dinner-dates in Paris, bought her jewellery for her to remember him by while he was still posted in Europe. Until he came back to the US in a couple of months time. They’d laughed and chatted and smooched and-
-and yet still, nothing made her heart feel fuller than returning to this pokey little apartment in Brooklyn. One that was so small Chloe and Beca had no choice but to share a bed due to Fat Amy’s insistence in ‘needing her space’.
The redhead perched on the edge of the bed. On Beca’s side. It was weird to be back here. When they’d left Chloe had still harboured feelings for her best friend. Feelings she’d been enduring for seven years. Chicago changed all that. Had kinda helped her…forget…about those feelings.
Chloe felt a wave of sadness submerge her body, and tears began to prick her eyes. She was so scared. Scared of now entering the next stage of her life where it was no longer acceptable to have these feelings for Beca. No. She’d had all the time in the world to tell the brunette how she really felt, but as always, Chloe had wasted that time. She wished she’d been more aware of how precious the moments she’d shared with Beca had been. She’d shared a bed with the woman for three years for crying out loud!
Beca had been offered a recording contract. She’d assured Chloe and Fat Amy that she’d still live in New York with them, but that she’d have to go to LA at intervals. But as Chloe looked around the tiny apartment she realised how different everything already felt.
Her eyes clasped upon an envelope that sat, propped up against the cookie jar on the small kitchen table. Her name was scrawled on the front of it and Chloe knew it was Beca’s handwriting.
She took a deep breath, then stepped up to the kitchen table, picking up the envelope, then taking a seat on one of the chairs around the table.
Her heart was hammering as her fingers fumbled to undo the envelope. Beca didn’t write cards. Not unless it was a birthday. And even then the woman would usually only ever put her name at the bottom.
Chloe pulled out the card, tears still in her eyes, and she let out a gentle smile. On the front of the card was a photo of a close-up of a cow’s face. The redhead opened the card and let out a small gasp as she saw that Beca had written on both sides of the inside.
I’m really sorry I’m not home when you get back from Europe. Like I said last week, I’ll have just missed you at the airport.
Chloe sniffed as she remembered Beca announcing to the Bellas that she would have to fly out to LA a week after they returned from their USO tour. The week that Chloe had ended up spending in Europe with Chicago..
I hope you had a great time with Chicago. I hope he treated you well. And I hope he makes you happy. Because you deserve to be really happy.
Chloe noticed a slight smudge in the ink, as though Beca had spilt some water on the word ‘happy’ then frantically wiped it, accidentally smearing it in the process. She knew what Beca was like. The brunette would have been really annoyed about that.
Shit, sorry I haven’t congratulated you yet on getting your place at vet school, which was the whole point in me getting you this card! And now I’ve written shit! Twice! Sorry!
Chloe let out a light chuckle, tears beginning to roll down her cheeks as she read her best friend’s words in Beca’s voice, such was how conversationally the woman had written the card.
So CONGRATULATIONS! Seriously Beale, I’m so proud of you! You dug deep, worked hard, and it’s all paid off. You’re gonna be an awesome vet! I honestly couldn’t be prouder.
Chloe let out a deep shuddering breath. Beca was right, she HAD worked hard. But she’d done it. She’d finally got into vet school.
I’m going to be away for a few weeks but..it might be longer so.. I don’t want to ruin whatever you’ve got going on with Chicago but I’ve spent a long time thinking over this past week without you here with me and I realised just how much I’m going to miss you while I’m away.
Chloe felt her heart skip a beat and return with an almighty thud as she read Beca’s next sentence.
Because I’m kinda in love with you.
What?? Beca was..in LOVE with her! Chloe stared at those words, reading and re-reading them in Beca’s handwriting. The knot in Chloe’s stomach unravelled itself and the redhead let out a huge sob of relief. Beca loved her! Chloe brought a hand to her mouth as she continued reading.
And I get that it’s the shittest thing for me to do - to tell you in a card, when you’d just returned from Europe where you’d been hanging out with your boyfriend and I’m not even here to talk about it with you or fight about it with you or however you might react to reading this card. But for the first time ever (and probably the last time) I’ve listened to Amy who assured me you needed to find out at some point.
Chloe noticed there were more smudges on those words and the redhead began to wonder if Beca had maybe been crying when she’d been writing this card.
I get that things might be awkward between us now, but I’m hoping my time away in LA will be enough for you to forgive me? Then maybe we can keep being friends. Because like I said I really am going to miss you. And I don’t think I could handle not being friends with you, especially with this whole crazy recording contract thing. You’re like my rock.
Chloe wasn’t sure how long she’d gone without breathing, but she didn’t care. How could Beca possibly think that she wouldn’t want to be friends with her any more?? If anything..Chloe would’ve taken this opportunity to tell Beca that she felt the same way. But it was too late. Beca’s flight to LA had left three quarters of an hour ago. Chloe had no idea how long the brunette would be away for. And so much could change in that time.
So for what it’s worth - if it’s worth anything at all - I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you no matter how crazy our lives get.
I’ll always be the rain cloud to your sunshine.
Chloe let out a small smile, gliding her thumb delicately over those words. It had always been a joke between them for the past couple of years that Beca was like a rain cloud with her ‘moody, pessimistic demeanour’ and Chloe was like sunshine with her ‘smiley, optimistic attitude’. Something that had collectively made them such great leaders when guiding The Bellas through college.
I’ll text you when I land in LA of course.
“Of course” Chloe thought, having always insisted that any of the Bellas text her to tell her that they’d arrived at whatever destination they had been travelling to.
And..I hope we’re okay.
Chloe swallowed loudly. Of course they were okay. She adored Beca and everything about her. Reading this card only made Chloe love her more. And her heart broke when she realised she didn’t even know when she’d next be seeing Beca to talk to her properly about it.
Love Beca xx
‘Love’ and two kisses. Beca never put kisses at the end of anything. And the woman used the word ‘love’ very loosely, if at all.
Chloe let out a heavy, shuddering breath as she closed the card over and stared at the cow on the front again. Beca loved her. Beca was in love with her! She hadn’t made it all up had she? It seemed like something Chloe would daydream about.
The redhead opened the card again, her eyes immediately drawn to those sacred words “Because I’m kinda in love with you”. Nope, she definitely hadn’t made it up. And all of a sudden Chloe burst into tears, sobbing loudly as she brought her free hand to her mouth and bawled loudly into it. For so many years she’d wished and dreamt and hoped that Beca might have some tiny ounce of feeling for her that stepped beyond friendship. But she’d only over dreamt that Beca would fall in love with her.
Now all Chloe could do was stick around in New York and patiently wait for her best friend to return home. She’d happily wait weeks. Heck she’d even wait months for Beca to return home to her. She’d even wait ye-
Chloe jumped as she heard a key quickly scramble in the lock of the apartment door. She flung her eyes over, expecting Fat Amy to bundle through the door. But to her shock, it was Beca!
“Shit..” Beca muttered under her breath, hesitating as she looked down at the open card in Chloe’s hand. Chloe was speechless. “Listen, Chlo, I’m sorry..I hoped I could get back before you and get rid of that card-“
“-you’re in love with me?” Chloe interrupted, sniffing loudly. The apartment fell silent as the two best friends stared at one another. Beca looked terrified, clearly unable to work out if Chloe was happy about this news or not. But she presumed the latter. The thing was, there was no going back.
“Yeah” Beca croaked quietly, and Chloe raised her eyebrows, taking a huge deep breath and looking back down at the card in her hands. This was so much to process.
She thought she’d done it. She thought she’d got over Beca once and for all. She’d found an amazing guy, Chicago, who had asked her to promise to wait for him to return to the US in a couple of months time. And she’d agreed, because she felt there was absolutely, categorically no way Beca would ever reciprocate her feelings. Ever. But she did. Beca. The girl who she’d been hopelessly pining for during their time together in college. She reciprocated those feelings!
“Please,” Beca began, tears starting to well up in her eyes, having had to watch Chloe stare at her card for too long, “I don’t want things to get weird between us. Just..try to forget what I’ve said and how I feel and just..let’s continue with our li-“
“-why aren’t you on a flight to LA?” Chloe blubbed, looking up from the card in her hands and over at her best friend, standing slowly as she did.
“My flight got cancelled. So they changed the date of my meeting.” Beca said honestly, “That’s why I dashed back, to try to get rid of that card before you read it.”
Chloe raised her eyebrows, “You weren’t ever going to tell me?” she asked quietly, in a hurt tone. She watched as Beca swallowed loudly, tears really brimming in her eyes now. Then the brunette gently shook her head.
“Why?” Chloe asked, slowly walking towards her best friend.
“Because..” Beca said, hesitating as she tried to find the words to explain her intentions. So she let out a shaky breath and shrugged, “You kissed Chicago. He made you happy. Far happier than I’d seen you look in years. And I saw your Instagram stories of the two of you together this past week and..when I got to the airport..I guess I realised that I’d never made you look that happy. And that by me telling you how I felt..well that would’ve been selfish of me. So that’s why I was planning on getting rid of that card.”
Chloe looked down at the card Beca had just motioned to, her eyes focussing on the smudged words that had clearly been touched upon with Beca’s tears while she’d written it. This was the rawest Chloe had ever seen her best friend be. And it was all for her. Beca’s steely demeanour now stripped back to reveal the woman Chloe truly knew better than anyone. This was HER Beca.
“I…” Chloe said with a heavy sigh, “have been in love with you for seven years.”
The redhead looked up at her best friend with a soft smile and a shrug. Her heart soared as she saw Beca hesitate, her little mouth dropping open slightly in surprise.
“Oh..uh..” was all Beca could muster.
“So Amy was right, I did need to find out. And I’m so glad that I know how you really feel.” Chloe said sweetly, sniffing as tears began to return to her eyes, her previous tears having now dried to her cheeks and chin.
“Why?” Beca asked cautiously.
Chloe took another step forward, now mere inches from her best friend, “Because now I can do this..” she whispered, and the redhead gently brought her face towards Beca’s and placed a soft kiss on her lips.
It was the briefest of actions, but in that time both women let out huge sighs of relief, goofy smiles on their faces as they parted. They gently smoothed the tips of their noses together.
Title: patience (or lack
thereof) Summary: Exasperated by the slow process of Sasuke and Sakura getting
together, Kakashi and Naruto discuss their relationship. Disclaimer: I don’t own Naruto. Prompt: An Outsider’s Point of View Rating: K A/N: I tried to get this out for ssmonth but couldn’t manage to
before a very important visit arrived! Oh well, at least I still whipped this
out ahhaa. I think many of you will love this one :)
“Those two are impossible.”
Never looking up from his forever-favored
little orange novel, Kakashi merely hummed in reply, distractedly stirring his
chopsticks into his miso soup’s steaming broth. “Give them time, Naruto,” he
drawled. “It’s only been six months since he came back from his journey.”
But his former student didn’t seem to feel
the same, throwing his arms up expressively. “Exactly, Kaka-sensei—it’s been six months!” he exclaimed. Naruto leaned
his head back against the frame of the chair, groaning hopelessly. “What the hell
is Sasuke doing?”
At this, Kakashi glanced at him, lips
tugging lightly under his mask. Naruto only proceeded to lean forward again and
shove a handful of noodles into his mouth, features annoyed. It was just like
him to get frustrated that things weren’t moving along fast enough between his
two best friends.
“Sasuke is healing and trying to put his
life back in order,” Kakashi calmly settled to explain, returning to his
beloved book. He absentmindedly poked at a piece of grilled eggplant. “He’s
spent years away from us on a path that he knows now did neither him nor anyone
else any good, and now he’s trying to come to terms with all that.”
A snort of pure
disbelief sounded beside him. “Oh come on,
he’s had two years to work through that—and you know he’s been doing great
That was true
enough. Still, Kakashi simply shrugged in response. “Maybe not well enough to
pairing: psycho!wonwoo x psychologist!fem reader words: 4078 warnings: violence, smut a/n: thanks for request wedomaatter! the ‘’scenario’’ is nearly a fic with the length (oops!) but here ya go! when i read it i thought of joker x harley?? so im sorry if its not what you since i didnt really know how to write push and pull… and somehow smut ended up in it uhm.. yea
BTS REACTION - Finding out you can’t eat with chopsticks
Jin would be so caught up in his own food that for a while he wouldn’t even notice the trouble you were having. When he does, though, he’ll quickly offer his help, scooting his chair closer to yours and feeding you both from his bowl with well practiced hands. Admittedly he’s not the fairest of sharers; you’re sure his mouthful are bigger than yours and that he’s sneaking extras when you’re not looking.
“One for you Jagi, and two for me!”
Yoongi always keeps a close eye on you at mealtimes, though you never realise it. He just wants to make sure you’re looking after yourself and eating enough, so when one night you sit playing with your food he very quickly notices it. He asks why you’re not eating, and when you blush and quietly explain that you don’t know how, Yoongi doesn’t hesitate to summon a waiter and request a knife and fork for you instead.
“Don’t worry what anyone thinks, your health is more important.”
You’ve always struggled a little when using chopsticks; skilled enough to manage larger pieces of food but always faltering when it comes to rice or noodles or anything fiddly. Unfortunately it’s rice that’s on the menu during your first meal with the whole group, and when you manage to spill a whole mouthful on your lap you feel your cheeks start to blaze with embarrassment. Luckily, Hobi’s right on it, distracting any attention away from you by pinching it up grain by grain from your skirt like a monkey picking fleas and making the noises to match.
“Ah, see how she feeds me? My baby’s so thoughtful.”
You’d confessed to your ineptitude when it came to using chopsticks the very moment Namjoon had told you about the upcoming meal with the BigHit executives you were expected to attend. As predicted your boyfriend immediately took it upon himself to teach you the new skill, patiently showing you the exact way to hold each stick to achieve maximum dexterity and making you practice again and again under his tutelage.
“You’re a fast learner, aren’t you baby? Just try moving your hand back - that’s it!”
(I know it’s not really a suitable gif but it was just too cute not to)
Jimin hadn’t even given it a second thought that there wasn’t anything other than chopsticks to eat with in the house; he’d always just presumed that you knew how to use them because, well, why wouldn’t you? It comes to a complete surprise to him when you start to huff and pout over your plate, getting increasingly frustrated as food keeps falling on its way to your mouth. Jimin thinks it’s adorable, but you’re not so amused when he starts to giggle and pinch your cheeks.
“You’re so cute Jagi! Here, look, I’ll help you. Don’t get mad.”
This was the first time you’d met the rest of Taehyung’s group, and though it’s only an informal dinner at the dorm you still want to make a good impression. That’s why when Jin lays the table with chopsticks your heart starts to sink, and sure enough half an hour later you’re sat glaring at your bowl, almost trying to will the food into your mouth rather than struggle. With a sigh, and knowing your hands are clean, you eventually give in and start to eat entirely with your fingers, trying to ignore the looks being passed between the others. Luckily, Tae joins in right next to you, moulding his rice into balls before shoving them into his mouth two at a time, grinning.
“This is more fun anyway, right? Guys, isn’t she perfect for me?”
Whoever invented the idea of sharing platters? Especially sharing platters when the only utensils you have are ones you’re notoriously bad with. Jungkook watches as you pick up and drop a slice of meat at least three times, finally thinking you’ve gotten it and then slipping again, this time right on the tablecloth. You stammer your apologies to his parents, flushing when your boyfriend gently kisses your cheek and takes your bowl, filling it with thin slices of beef and rice like a gentleman.
“What else would you like, Noona? I’ll get it for you.”
This job is hard. It’s hard as a student, learning things most people will never understand. It’s hard as a brand new nurse; no patient or seasoned nurse truly has faith in you.
You want to learn. You want to know things. You want to get to the point in your job where you are comfortable in your skills, the patients trust you, and the doctors start to know your name and believe in your abilities.
It takes time. The first year of nursing will be the hardest year of your life and you will find yourself truly doubting your intelligence and intellect for the first time ever. You will make mistakes, second guess yourself, cry after work, cry during work, cry before work. You will triumph, and you will fail miserably.
But with literally every single moment of every single day, you will learn so much more than you’ve ever learned in your entire life combined. You will learn about human suffering, joy, love, sorrow, insanity, and pain. You will experience moments that will haunt you forever. Moments you will bury down deep inside because the people closest to you could never understand.
Student nurses, stay with it. You aren’t there yet. School is hard. It does get harder. But it also gets better.
I was a student. Nursing school was the hardest thing I had ever done up to that point. I will not downplay that. Ever. It is so hard.
But then I was a new nurse. And it was harder. I experienced things that will haunt me to the grave. I was bullied by patients, doctors, and nurses.
I’m still learning. I’m still a baby nurse. But I’ve got a bit of time and a little experience under my belt now. I’ve been a nurse in the burn ICU, a med-surg nurse, and now a bone marrow transplant/oncology nurse. I’ve dealt with nurse bullies, bully doctors, and abusive patients and families. I’ve seen all kinds of sickness, I’ve welcomed new life, and I’ve held countless hands as their pulses faded away.
I’m here to tell you, student nurses, new nurses, that this job is hard. It is cruel and unforgiving at times.
But it is so worth it. It may get harder, but it will get easier as time goes on. The bonds you form with patients, doctors, and fellow nurses will bring you through it.
You knew it would be difficult when you chose such a selfless profession. This job takes heart. It takes a special kind of person that was meant to heal this harsh world.
Stay with it. It gets so much better. It is rewarding. We are here and we want you to succeed. Forget the nurse bullies, forget the bad. You are a guardian angel and you chose this noble path.
Thank you student nurses, thank you new nurses. I was there, not long ago. If I could go back and do it again, I would in a heartbeat. Because I am right where I want to be.
New ob patient. She had a miscarriage at 12 weeks a few months before this pregnancy and she is so scared. This baby is so badly wanted.
I put the ultrasound probe on her belly, my stomach in knots too. “Please be there, please be there.” I think to the universe.
And there, floating in her uterus, is a perfect little fetus. A fuzzy flutter in the middle of the chest, two tiny arms and legs. “See, that’s the heart. Those are the arms and legs. That’s the head, you can see the brain and eyes forming. They’re ok.” I tell her. We listen to the whoosh-whoosh-whoosh of a fantastic heartbeat. The tension in the room evaporates and she starts crying with relief, I tear up a little bit too. Hello, rainbow baby.