And speaking of gross bros thinking of nerd girls like fucking unicorns…
I was actually talking to a female client once about cannon-fannon and how much I love listening to her talk comics, and had a male client interupt us to tell me he has never met a chick that is into comics before, he’s never even heard of a girl being into comics before, and he has always wanted a nerdy girlfriend and that i absolutely MUST give him her number.
I actually had to explain to him that I wasn’t joking when I said she was out of his league. Yes, she is incredible, she is beautiful, she is intelligent, successful, highly knowledgeable and enthusiastic about comics, and she’s also not even going to look twice at you because literally all you got is that she fulfills a fantasy of yours.
Yes bro i get it, she’s your ideal girl. Trust me, she’s a lot of people’s ideal girl. And you’re not even on her radar. You’re not special because you’re into comics. She has a very wide range of potential partners to choose from and ‘never having met a nerdy girl before’ isn’t a good character trait, because it means you know zero women. Or zero women have trusted your creepy ass with the knowledge that they are into comics.
The most concerning part of that entire conversation was his complete inability to grasp the concept that she wouldn’t date him and his insistence that she would.
He insisted that I give her name/number/fb/actually call her and ask her to come to the studio (wtffff???) because he needed to meet her. And then just could not fathom that I refused. He seemed to be running on this idea that if she met him, she would like him. For no other reason than that he was into comics and he wanted a nerd girlfriend.
And I was somehow out of line for refusing to give my best freinds deets to this creepy nerdbro because I couldn’t possibly know that she wouldn’t be into him.
He got really upset.
He was in my studio for 45 mins arguing with me on and off about this and trying to push me into giving her number.
Out. Of. Your. League. Not on your level. Too fucking good for you. Not a possibility. You’ve got nothing she wants. You’re one of literally thousands who would want her. You have nothing to offer her. You tick zero of her boxes. You do not even meet the minimum requirements for me to even ask her.
This is why women don’t say they’re women in WoW, this is why women don’t say they’re into games irl. This is why women don’t hang out in comics stores. This is why nerd women hide one of these two aspects of themselves when interacting with nerd men.
Y’know, as a cis dude, it’s not my place to define what particular sorts of conduct count as transmisogynistic - but I’m totally comfortable asserting that, to the extent that a given conduct is
transmisogynistic, the fact that you don’t do it very often doesn’t give you a free pass.
Transmisogyny doesn’t just look like being a cackling cartoon supervillain who spends his every waking moment plotting ways to hurt trans women.
It can also look like being a faux-tolerant nerdbro who’s totally cool with trans women right up until the moment a trans woman crosses him in some way, whereupon he’ll enthusiastically wield the fact that they’re trans against them.
I’ve been meaning to post something about The Big Bang Theory for a while now but it’s taken me ‘till now to really understand what it is about the show that makes me uncomfortable. I’m not exactly a believer in the whole “only write about the things you like, don’t trash the things you don’t” trend which seems to be plaguing comments sections in negative articles lately, but I wanted to be able to really examine why I don’t like TBBT rather than just slagging it off. My main questions being - Why don’t I like this anymore? Why do I feel uncomfortable watching it? And why do I get so annoyed when I see people sing its praises online? The thing which really sparked this post was seeing a raft of comments on Facebook, below the last round of voting in Television Without Pity’s Tubey Awards, claiming The Big Bang Theory to be “the best comedy on TV”. This made me angry so instead of posting an impulsive comment calling out their bad taste which I’d probably regret later, I decided to really analyse why seeing comments like that made me so mad when previously, although I didn’t really love the show, I’d never considered myself as disliking The Big Bang Theory.
Hell, I even have season one on dvd, it’s sitting right between Battlestar Galactica and Bored To Death in my alphabetised collection.
And here, I think, is where my problem with The Big Bang Theory lies…
the fake geek girl stereotype is always annoying, but i find it especially obnoxious when it’s directed towards girls with fandom related tattoos. like, if you think a girl is gonna get a whole star wars or doctor who themed sleeve put on her body permanently solely to impress your crusty ass, please sit the fuck down
Whenever I come across posts where black guys talk about how girls didn’t like them because they were geeks/like anime/video games, I remember all the times those same guys turned me and other black girls like me down even though we had the same interests. I remember wondering why these guys didn’t like me even though we had all these things in common. I learned why years later and hurt for all my black girls who are being turned down bc they don’t look a certain way.
i am currently enrolled in an Introduction to Sociology class at a nearby college facility and i am doing a final project. it is about society’s view of nerds/nerd culture and how it may be changing for the better or for the worse. as part of the project, i have created a short survey on google forms (11 questions, last 2 are optional) and if you would like to take this survey and provide responses (or also reblog this post) i would appreciate that from the depths of my cool little soul and it’d make me pretty happy. thank you very much!