reasons why spuffy is 1397% better than bangel

Spike watched Buffy grow up and face the most serious challenges of her entire life, angel left before all that crap went down…Spike saw Buffy at her absolute worst, the understanding between them was greater than anything Angel and Buffy ever had.

Spike loved Buffy and couldn’t hurt her even before he had a soul. True, he had a chip in his head that prevented it, but it was more than that. He couldn’t kill her, couldn’t even hurt her, felt bad when he did something to make her feel badly….when Angel didn’t have a soul Buffy’s feelings and her wellbeing didn’t matter to him anymore, he only cared about making her suffer. He was completely and utterly cruel. Spike’s love for Buffy went deeper than Angel’s, deeper even than his very soul.

sex can be a thing also have you seen his cheekbones idk man spuffy is just great it’s great okay we good? we good

The Nine Circles of Shipper Hell

1. limbo – the canon-shippers
Those who ship the actual pairings as they appear in canon. Barely even belong in Shipper Hell at all. Condemned to a miserable dependence on a fickle deity. Featuring: Buffy/Angel; Peeta/Katniss; Edward/Bella.

2. lust – the crack-shippers
Okay, so they ship it, but do they ship it? The mildest ring of shipper hell, for those people who will ship anything on a dare. Condemned to eternal mockery, but let’s be real, that’s not actually a punishment for these guys. Featuring: Bella/Tyler’s Van; Bilbo/Smaug; Hogwarts/Giant Squid.

3. gluttony – the ultra-common-shippers
You know the one ship. It’s the one that’s in every. single. fic. Even if it’s not the focus, it gets thrown in in the background. Condemned to have their fanart shown to the actors on chat shows. Featuring: Dean/Castiel; John/Sherlock; Clint/Coulson.

4. greed – the multi-shippers
They write your favorite pairing, but then when you go to binge on their work it turns out they write EVERYTHING ELSE TOO and OH MY GOD NOT THAT PAIR. Need to pick one OTP like the rest of us. Condemned to be eternally hated by BOTH sides of every shipping war. Featuring: Harry/Ron AND Harry/Luna AND Draco/Ginny.

5. anger – the trash-shippers
Trash and they know it. Sometimes it’s trash/cinnamon roll, sometimes it’s trash/trash, but it’s always trash. Condemned to…IDK, be trash? These guys are pretty up front about it. Featuring: Bucky/Pierce; Sauron/Morgoth; Hux/Kylo.

6. heresy – the rare-pair-shippers
Not to be confused with the crack-shippers. These guys mean it. Oh god do they mean it. They have treatises about Anonymous Pilot #17/That One Guy From The Novelization. Condemned to three fics on AO3, two of which are mistags. Featuring: Rosie Cotton/Erestor; Deadpool/Sif; Ianto/Rory Williams.

7. violence – the NOTP-shippers
That One Ship. The one that inspires Hatred and Outrage in the hearts of All True Believers. They ship it. They are Those People. Condemned to have their ship tags full of indignant posts about BAD EXAMPLES FOR TEENAGE GIRLS. Featuring: Hux/Rey; Dean/Amara; Willow/Kennedy.

8. fraud – the incest-shippers
Sure, we all understand they know it’s wrong in real life. We still edge away nervously. They can just go … do their thing … over there. Condemned to awkward questions about whether they have any siblings, forever. Featuring: Sam/Dean; Thor/Loki; Draco/Lucius.

9. treachery – the ship-burners
The one circle we can all agree to hate. These are the guys who shoot down one ship so they can put their own in. They’re the ones who demonize female characters so they can ship their favorite gays. Not cool, guys. Condemned to MANY ANGRY REVIEWS. Featuring: Gabriel/Sam/Jess; Clint/Thor/Jane; Harry/Ron/Hermione.

The signs as Willow Rosenberg quotes
  • Aries:"I am Willow. I am death."
  • Taurus:"There's no use arguing with me. Do you see my resolve face? You've seen it before. You know what it means."
  • Gemini:"You're going to live forever and you don't have time for a cup of coffee?"
  • Cancer:"It's hard for me to say anything cool. Or witty. Or at all. I can usually make a few vowel sounds, and then I have to go away."
  • Leo:"And remember, if you hurt her, I will beat you to death with a shovel. A vague disclaimer is nobody's friend. Have fun!"
  • Virgo:"Oh my Goddess!"
  • Libra:"I was never a gun. Someone else should be the gun. I could be a cudgel. Or a pointy stick."
  • Scorpio:"I'm so evil and skanky...And I think I'm kinda gay."
  • Sagittarius:"I worship Beelzebub! I do his bidding. Do you see any goats around? No, because I sacrificed them!"
  • Capricorn:"I'm your friend; I would call you repulsive in a second."
  • Aquarius:"Occasionally I'm callous and strange."
  • Pisces:"Hard to believe such a hot mama-yama like me came from humble, geek-infested roots."