Makeup-Competition

i think i have my first crush, but i can’t tell if i really like her or if i just like the idea of loving her. she transferred to my school in feb and i found that i couldn’t stop looking for her, like i needed to see her. her eyes are two different colors and i think it’s the most beautiful thing. her laugh sounds like an orange orchard, and i can’t bear to be awkward around her. she always looks good, even w/ no makeup. i get competitive when i see her dress well, or do her makeup well, like i wanna show her i’m just as good as her. 

at prom i had to dance w/ her, i couldn’t help it, she looked like a princess. she went w/ a guy, and it didn’t feel right seeing her slow-dance w/ him and kiss him, almost like heartburn. i know she likes girls, but when we first met i ID’ed as ace/aro. she made me question that more than the one boy i dated ever did, but i think she wouldn’t understand my feelings since she still thinks i’m not attracted to anyone.