keith, at two in the morning: [muttering to himself, moving strings around a conspiracy board, completely immersed in whatever he’s doing]
lance, just woken up: keith? what are you doing? why are you up so late?
keith: i’m trying to connect the dots. it can’t be a coincidence.
lance: …what can’t be a coincidence?
keith, turning to lance to reveal his conspiracy board, which has multiple pictures of my chemical romance tacked onto it: gerard way said he wanted to follow the path of the band smashing pumpkins, a band that was together for twelve years, then broke up for six, then came back. my chemical romance formed in 2001, then broke up in 2013. twelve years as a band. additionally, their album “danger days: the true lives of the fabulous killjoys” takes place in 2019. 2019 is six years after 2013 - six years after they broke up. also, before splitting, they released the song “fake your death.” could my chemical romance’s split be a fake? will they come back in 2019? i need to know.
“why are you wearing makeup? we’re going to a casual place you shouldn't—” well if gerard way could go to fucking everywhere looking like a vampire with teal roots and really dramatic red eyeshadow I damn sure can put some on some mascara shut the fuck up bill
why are time travel books/movies always so intense like why does everyone wanna change the past if i could time travel you know my ass would be getting punched in the fucking face at a bullets mcr show
[flourishing a paper dramatically] for my next batch of weirdly specific and irrelevant headcanons, i give you: voltron driving hcs
pidge – too young to drive, but when she turns 16 literally no one is surprised to discover she is an awful driver. her turns are too sharp, her stops are too sudden, and she doesn’t watch her speedometer (“ma'am do you know how fast you were going?” “uh…35” “60”). i’m not entirely sure that she even passed her driving test, but i am totally sure she takes matt’s car anyway.
hunk – also not a great driver. he just. never really gets a feel for driving. in the first six months he drove, he got three flat tires and countless dents. good news: he’s good at fixing cars. he just cannot drive them.
lance – honestly, a good driver, but he always has music blasting and is always dancing and it scares the life out of hunk (“lance please put your hands on the wheel!” “lance please stop tapping your foot, that’s the gas pedal!” “LANCE YOURE GONNA MISS THAT TURN–”). he has never been in an accident, though, and genuinely enjoys driving. therefore he is the official driver between himself, pidge, and hunk.
keith – That Asshole who thinks traffic laws don’t apply to him. has never gone the speed limit in his life. common conversations in his car:
“keith, stop tailgating that guy, he’s going the speed limit” “well it’s too slow!!”
“keith stop that’s a red light” “don’t worry, there are no cars around and this intersection doesn’t have a camera”
“please slow down oh my god that’s a sharp turn yOURE GONNA FLIP THE CAR” “[laughing as the tires squeal]”
again, though, he is a genuinely Good Driver and has never been pulled over, much to lance’s annoyance.
shiro: everybody /thinks/ he’s a good driver bc he’s the model of safety whenever he’s driving the kids (“i’m not pulling out of the driveway until everyone is buckled up”). then, one day, the kids are driving on the highway and they see shiro’s car speed past, going at least 90mph and weaving between traffic. incredible.
allura: doesn’t drive often, but when she does, she has RIDICULOUS road rage. like, she’s a good driver otherwise, but whenever someone cuts her off or something, she’ll hold down the horn and then rant at her unfortunate passenger (usually shiro) for a solid minute. at least.
coran: perfect driver. uses turn signals perfectly, smooth turns, effortless merging. if he’s running late for something? all of that way past the speed limit. best driver.
matt: could be a good driver in theory, but never focused on the road. he zones out so easily that, like pidge, he’s almost constantly over the speed limit. “[staring unseeingly at the road for five minutes] shiro do you think gerard way is happy?“ "please god let me drive”