Do you like summer nights? ♡ I think anyone has longed to have picnics/outings on summer nights. I’ve started liking the outdoors a bit. I often bring out the dogs I’m raising, and it’s nice being exposed to the refreshing wind. I also sit on the tables in front of convenience stores a lot of times.
What if the passers-by notice you? ♡ I wear clothes that won’t attract too much attention. Even if I wear masks and sunglasses and hats, if my clothes are those of “Key” image, then it would be noticeable. But if I wear jerseys and slippers, even if I’m not that reclusive, no one would notice. A few days ago we played in front of a convenience store, too.
It’s quite late at night right now. How did you spend your day today? ♡ I was packing my things.
Like luggage? ♡ Whenever I go out, the things I have to prepare to bring are different every time so.. (while pointing at his bag which seems to be so full to the point of bursting) today, I only bought a little. I didn’t bring a bento/lunchbox. Since I’m regulating my meals, instead of eating food that’s bought, I’m more comfortable with eating food that I made. I pack my bento the day before, just before I go to sleep, then I prepare my snacks, and I also pack vitamins and ginseng.
What do you do after packing your things? ♡ I take a shower, listen to music, sign stuff, then record. I sleep while traveling. Since I’m not the type who sleeps a lot, so when there’s time left after I slept, I read my script. And then I come here to NYLON’s photoshoot.
Key always gives a lot of ideas during photoshoot, so what can we expect from you this time? ♡ I think about what to do during that time I’m doing it. Also, since it’s part of the job to show (something), then I hope there wouldn’t be repeats/overlaps. Since until now, I’ve shown a lot of boyish and manly images, so I’m considering something that will be related to our newly released album this time. An image of something sporty but not ordinary.
What are you interested in/concerned with lately? ♡ Lately I haven’t been buying clothes much. There are a lot of cute stuff but I don’t have anything I want to buy. There are times when even I’m busy, I always make time to shop. Whether it’s because I don’t have time to go and survey things or I just don’t have anything I want, I’m not sure. Or maybe instead of clothing, I’m concentrating more on what I do. Like, I’m more concerned in my appearance instead of the clothes I wear.
What kind of comments did you have regarding your album, Odd? ♡ I talked a lot regarding our stage outfits. I wanted to make an interesting image without consistently wearing a lot of production clothes. Ah, since we’re going to sing deep house, we can’t wear uniforms. It’s easy to look at pastel tones and cute clothes, and we have clearly defined lines between what is liked and disliked.
Did you also gather the other SHINee member’s opinions? ♡ The members don’t dislike anything. All of us has a clear understanding of what each of us likes and dislikes. I like clothes, so I have a lot of comments regarding our stage outfits. There are members who are more concerned with the songwriting and there are members who are more interested in the dance/choreography, so we let out a lot of comments (in different areas). Whether the comments will be gathered and considered or not is the responsibility of the specialists. Since we’ve experienced various things in our seven years (of performing), we are able to do our own judgments, too. In this album (Odd), a lot of SHINee’s ideas and decisions are included.
How special is this time’s album (Odd) to Key? ♡ I thought that even if it receives bad results, this album is definitely something I won’t be ashamed of when it is released. It is still something that we came up with and to be able to see the outcome makes me happy. Time really goes by fast. So I’m enjoying each and every day. One day when I look back to this comeback, I think that a lot of good memories will remain.
Have you ever had the feeling of wanting to do your own music? ♡ If I want to do certain songs/music, I always do it during concerts. But I don’t know if (my kind of music) is something that will sell if released officially. More than greed, I have a greater sense of responsibility. I’ve gradually become careful. I don’t strictly evaluate the things I want to show, just that I think it’s great if it’s able to be enjoyed onstage. Also, it is not necessary that all of us in the group should release solo albums. My solo act will be in the form of broadcast(ed shows) and musicals, those kind of activities.
*[Translated by: nikkirlia/nikkitsuki] **[The full interview is currently unavailable online however if you have a link you can contact us here]
A/N: tw for internalized transphobia and mention of dysphoria. Also friendly reminder English is my second language ;)
“We need to talk.”
The last thing Maggie expected to find when coming home was her girlfriend looking grave sitting on the couch and uttering those words while she barely was through the door. She imediately braced herself for what was to come; she had heard those words numerous times before and it rarely ended well.
“Oookay… Wait, are you drunk?” Maggie noticed now the half empty bottle of scotch on the table, the bloodshot eyes and the slight swaying of her body.
“Pleaaase, it’s important Maggiiiie.” She whined, slurring her words. Yep, definitively intoxicated.
“You’re drunk, Alex. I think that whatever it is, it can wait tomorrow when you’ll be sober.” She crossed her arms and arched an eyebrow.
“No, it can’t. I c-can’t talk about it sober. Pleaaase, Maggie. I need to tell you know before I chicken out.”
Seeing Alex so distressed, Maggie couldn’t help but soften slightly. “Okay, I’m listening.” She sit on the couch beside her girlfriend. But Alex was staying silent, head down, worrying her lips and playing with her fingers.
“Hey sweetie, look at me. It’s okay. It’s okay. Whatever it is, it will be okay.” She reached a hand to her shoulder and gently stroked it with her thumb.
“No, no, Maggie, you can’t tell me it’ll be okay. Once you know… O-once you know… I’m scared, I’m so sc-scared, M-mags…”
“Scared of what?”
“T-that you won’t want me anymore…”
“Why? Why would I wouldn’t want you, Alex? What’s wrong?”
She pointed at herself and then gestured wildly around. “Me. I’m wrong. I- i- I’m all wrong and you’re a lesbian…”
“What the fact that I’m a lesbian has to do with that?” Maggie asked, frowning.
“Because you like girls, and I- I- I’m not…” She shook her head and let out a strangled sob. “I just hate it all, Maggie. I didn’t realised before, but now it’s all I can think about. All I can feel. Like- like my skin is wrong. Everything is wrong, but I don’t know how to change it. Except now I know why. I finally got a word for it. But it doesn’t match with your word. It doesn’t go with lesbian. Because- because-…”
“…You’re not a girl.” She finished for her.
“So what are you? A boy?”
She shakes her head.
“Something else then? You’re nonbinary?”
Alex nodded again and heaved a sigh, relieved that Maggie had somehow get what she meant from her incoherent rambling.
“Oh sweetie. I’m not gonna leave you for that.” She cupped Alex’s jaw with her palm. “You hear me, babe? It’s okay you’re enby; I still love you whatever your gender is.”
She opened her arms and Alex immediately snuggled into her side, burried her face into her shoulder and let heart-breaking, relieved sobs. Maggie rocked her gently, soothingly.
“Shh, baby, it’s okay.” Alex gripped a fistful of Maggie’s t-shirt.
“You know, technically I identify as queer. I like girls, yes, but I’m quite flexible. I mean, I’ve dated aliens, so I should be, right? Anyway, I fell in love with you, not your gender, okay?”
They stayed there, sitting on the couch, Alex slowly relaxing in her girlfriend’s warm embrace, and finally, when she was calm enough, Maggie desentangled herself and sit up.
“Okay, now you’re gonna drink water and go to bed, and tomorrow we’ll discuss this further, okay?” Alex nod and get up with the help of steadying hand from Maggie.
“You’re really okay with me being nonbinary?” Alex asked, almost timidly.
“Yes, Al, I am. I’m totally, one hundred percent okay with it. Now go to bed.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, so much. And I’m so proud of you Ally.”
pasado mga kaibigan ko!!! tangina natutuwa ako shet haha sabi na eh. ginalingan masyado pero dapat talaga kasama ako sa kanila eh. kaso weak si tanga masyadong pinangunahan ng takot. nag enjoy ata sa walwal life haha hindi ko maiwasan di mainggit putik pero next year talaga mag t-take na ako!! inspired ako sa mga kaibigan kong lodi yay kaya mo yan, self.