Attn: Creators of the Reanimator movies

Why wasn’t there an installment about a female mad scientist called Reanimatrix?  That would be a great cult horror movie title!

(What would the plot be, you ask?  Anything.  Herbert West has a sister or a girl student he makes his apprentice.  Herbert West gets into an academic rivalry with a lady biochemist and they enter into a bloody war of escalation over who can make the better zombie.  Herbert West gets killed and an ambitious female med student reanimates him.  I’m just saying, it’s too good a title to waste.)

The Beholder is the best idea Gary Gygax ever had and nobody can be assed to say why. I’ve seen people agonize over the Beholder, trying to improve on the overall model, and it’s never worked for me. Thing is, you can’t deliberately improve a monster until you have a working theory for why it worked in the first place, and I couldn’t have told you what makes Beholders good until like a couple of days ago.

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Vast and lonely is the ocean, and even as all things came from it, so shall they return thereto. In the shrouded depths of time none shall reign upon the earth, nor shall any motion be, save in the eternal waters. And these shall beat on dark shores in thunderous foam, though none shall remain in that dying world to watch the cold light of the enfeebled moon playing on the swirling tides and coarse-grained sand. On the deep’s margin shall rest only a stagnant foam, gathering about the shells and bones of perished shapes that dwelt within the waters. Silent, flabby things will toss and roll along empty shores, their sluggish life extinct. Then all shall be dark, for at last even the white moon on the distant waves shall wink out. Nothing shall be left, neither above nor below the sombre waters. And until that last millennium, as after it, the sea will thunder and toss throughout the dismal night. ©

H.P. Lovecraft “The Night Ocean”