Meditate, meditate, meditate. Daily. Practice mindfulness. Continuously. These are the tools we have been given to manage our sanity within the context of an unhinged society. It’s an opportunity few really take. But I am telling you that if you take this opportunity, you wont regret it.
You do not need to take other people’s pain and suffering into your heart. This world is filled with enough suffering without trying to spread it. Rather, touch the pain and suffering you find and meet it with with love and spaciousness. That is what we call compassion.
To reject these thoughts and feelings is to fear them. To take them seriously is to be controlled by them. But simply remaining unmoved by their coming and going is peace itself. Then sometimes they wont even bother showing up.
Hey guys, I know I’ve been gone for a while but I have a new goal: establishing dream contact with my brother lazy yogi! I’m excited but I wasn’t sure if I could still lucid dream as easily as I used to but having lucid dreamed without trying I’m happy and inspired. So this is what happened:
I guess I’ve mastered the technique: WBTB (wake back to bed) because I inadvertently or rather unknowingly used the technique this morning… Well let’s say ‘subsequently’ used WBTB because my girlfriend wasn’t feeling well and I stayed awake to make sure she was okay. When I finally fell asleep I woke up to loud music playing. I was annoyed and wondering who was playing music so loud while I was trying to sleep! The song was by an artist called “partynextdoor”. I got up out of the bed I was in and immediately I realize I’m dreaming. This house was not my house but my grandparents house upstate ny. Everything was exactly how I remembered it when I used to visit when I was a kid. I walked slowly into the living room where the fireplace was and stood there rubbing my hands together: dream stability. I recalled my goal: meet my brother lazy yogi to establish contact via lucid dream. (I had something I needed to tell him and there was something he needed to tell me and if when we spoke in waking life he told me the correct phrase, I would know that we actually met in the dream). I walked towards the front door to head to the porch. I noticed some bright colored Nike sneaker boxes to my left which I took note of; they were very bright and stood out in the dream, they also are actually in my house in waking life. I went out into the porch and decided to fly to where lazy yogi was, which in retrospect was a bad idea: if the dream is not fully stabilized or the dreamer not deeper in sleep, trying to fly or something like that can easily wake them up. As I was about to fly I looked to my left and saw my (deceased) grandfather sitting on the porch with someone else I couldn’t make out. He looked content. I figured I would speak with him another time. I flew into the air but my ascent turned into a sharp arc and I came crashing back down onto the porch, which started to wake me up! My lucid dream training and instincts kick in and I remember how to save an ending dream: spin in circles. As I started to spin in circles everything goes black. Then I hear the sounds of an old movies real. Slowly then faster the movie real spun in conjunction with me spinning in circles and then I saw different scenes in front of my field of vision. The first image started to come closer but then retreated as if it weren’t the correct one. It faded into the darkness and flickered away. Another image slid from left to right and replaced it; it was a scene of people on a basketball court. Slowly the image came closer and closer until it enveloped me. Then creepily and subtly sounds of basket ball sneakers squeaking on the court invaded my “ears”. I suddenly felt as if someone were sliding a very heavy flooring beneath me, it was sort of like props being placed on stage all around as I lay there unable to move while the scene was being built. Then I heard yelling “yo man! You’re in the way! Get off of the court!” My girls phoned rang and woke me up out of the dream.
Hi lazy yogi just like to say HappyChristmas to all! :). In this time of year I’ve been around a lot of friends and family and am most of the time by myself as I loooove my own company I find my self hilarious in a good way not the crazy way loool. Only thing is I find myself being drained around other people and not the high energy person I am when I’m bymyslef or with one person. Maybe a lack of confidence can’t put my finger on it? Why is this???? Heeelp!!! — nickolodeon3000
I’m not for sure if this was originally for lazyyogi’s tumblr and it got to me by mistake or you’re just calling me lazyyogi. haha Anyway, i thought i’d answer this one because many people have this problem.
Overactive empathy is a huge issue for sensitive folk because we are opening up our awareness into others energies. The thing about auras is people don’t realize they arent exactly small and they extend into our environments. So If you were to imagine yourself in a giant sphere pulsating with vibrations of frequency transmitting out thoughts/emotions/feelings daily this is you.
Now image your sphere in a room of 10 plus people that’s a lot of energy in one room together.
As a sensitive we FEEL the emotional spheres of others by tapping into their frequency or vibrations. In laymans terms, you are an emotional sponge soaking up all these frequencies at once, this is why it can be ultra draining if you aren’t careful with yourself. Someone who isn’t sensitive is kinda like the equivalent of living in a foggy cloud of smoke instead of being able to SENSE their own frequency vibrations, they are unconscious towards them.
So the only way to overcome this is by coming back to your own frequency and trying to stay in that higher vibrational place of compassion, understanding and love. If we’re just shielding, we’re not really helping ourselves in this situation because shielding can be exhausting. You have to transform your frequency by changing your emotional output. The easiest way to do that?
LISTENING. Listening to others frequencies is very very healing and gives your empathy a nice boost of clarity. The more we listen to others instead of thinking over them, we are investing our energy in a positive way.
Take a simple conversation, instead of listening to this person talking, you are thinking about what to say next instead by doing this you aren’t properly hearing what they are telling you nor are your focusing on their energy, you are focusing on yours. Another instance is when you’re talking to someone but instead you feel constant ego thoughts in place of them speaking, this is when you need to step up, clear your enery by focusing on their eyes and listening.
Always come back to the heart space because this will transform overactive empathy into compassion and endurance. Letting go of the resistance gives you an opening to heal, listen and find strength within.
Yes I wanna be a runner and I wanna party with my friends, and yes I wanna be a yogi and I wanna eat fastfood from time to time, and yes sometimes I eat a whole chocolate bar or get really drunk.
I don’t call the yoga-, running-, hiking- and being in nature-phases my healthy phases. All the different things I am doing are healthy phases for me. Because I allow myself to be my most authentic self. With all the shit I’ve been through, I can say my most unhealthy moments have always been the ones where I gave up myself to be a person that fits in. If the fitness trend inspires me to go running more often and if that truly makes me happy, then that’s amazing! But if I suppress the other sides of my personality, the part of me that likes to party, that likes to stay up late and talk to my friends the whole night, but I get scared to listen to this voice because that’s not what a runner does, than I am in trouble. Yes, I fucking love the feeling after a run but I also love to travel and therefore I am not able to stick to a workout routine all the time. If I don’t accept these different, and sometimes contradictory sides of my personality, I will never end up being healthy and happy.
We contain so many different aspects of our personality within ourselves, so many different interests, passions and features, and we should be allowed to live them. That’s why I don’t like putting labels on myself. Yes, I wanna be a chocolate eating, traveling, series binging, hiking, backpacking, sun bathing, drinking, raw vegan organic food loving, silly, lazy, active yogi/runner/life lover and that’s what I am going to be <3 We’re constant change, and in the end I think that’s what makes us the beautiful individuals that we are, to truly express who we are in all our facets.
Hi Lazy Yogi. How would you suggest someone let's go of past occurrences and people who destabilized our energy and focus that they keep creeping into present moments and consistently deplete energy and time.
The way you carry the past into the future is no one’s doing but your own. Therefore the first step is becoming aware of the ways you carry the past.
Is there a resentment you are holding onto?
A past feeling you are avoiding or seeking?
A habit you keep repeating?
A cycle you find yourself locked in?
The idea or memory of a person you can’t shake?
There is a process popularized by Carlos Castaneda called recapitulation. This process is intended to reclaim the energy you have squandered, relinquished, or otherwise disbursed throughout your life. Much of this energy became knotted up in your interactions with people and your life events.
You begin the process in the present moment, tracing back through your immediate past and then working your way to your distant past until you go back to your very earliest memories. As the process unfolds, your access to energies in your present moment will increase. Less past equals more present.
The final result is arriving at your energetic wholeness, the entirety of the energy body.
To practice recapitulation, you must be able to examine the above bulleted questions over and over in different contexts. What stories and beliefs about yourself are you perpetuating? Don’t just examine the bad but also the good. The point is to release all of it into the shiny newness of the present moment.
Take time out of your day with the intent of reclaiming your past energy.
When you free up some energy, you will find new energy to use to help free up even more energy. This encourages a snowball effect.
The form of the practice is contemplation. Think on different people and situations that have you have become entangled with, both pleasant and unpleasant.
Let feelings arise. Remember the focus is not on analyzing but on reclaiming the power and energy tied into those memories. Forgive, let go, and breathe.
Essentially this is a practice of becoming present with greater intensity through abandoning the conscious, semi-conscious, and subconscious ways in which you continue to carry the past into the present moment.
Unattachment is central to this practice and also its result. When you realize you have only been chasing your own energies in the present that have been bound up in the past, you naturally become unattached to the things you mistook for your own inner power. The inner energetic drives return to their right place as intuition and naturalness.
Once you get the knack for it, don’t stop this practice. So long as you are taking on imprints from your experience of life, learn to let them go.
Daily meditation and mindfulness practice will be immense aids in this process as well. They will also anchor it into a continuous state of being.
Hey Lazy Yogi, I have been feeling a sense of disconnect. When I am doing an activity, speaking in front of people, speaking to other people one on one or just on the train on my way to school I feel like it is not me, whatever is happening is not happening to me. I feel like I don't belong here or anywhere. Do you have any explanation about this or advise on how to be more connected? Thank you
On a mental-emotional level, none of those things are you. They should flow without you getting stuck on any particular point.
On an experiential level, however, you are not experiencing the intimacy of existing. You aren’t feeling the immediacy, aliveness, and presence of your own existence. This is why you aren’t feeling connected.
There isn’t a gap between you and others that you need to cross. Rather, you would be benefitted by fully inhabiting your body and coming into deepening levels of self-contact.
Right off the bat, I would recommend the book Belonging Here by Judith Blackstone. It emphasizes body-mind techniques to help you feel more in touch with reality as it presents itself in daily life.
But to start you off right now, try this:
Sit somewhere comfortable and close your eyes. Breathe normally.
Feel your existence in your feet. Feel your feet from the inside out. Feel how your feet are feeling but also feel that part of your awareness that is in the foot, ready to feel whatever the foot is feeling.
Feel your leg up to your knees from the inside out. Feel the quality of these body parts but also the portion of your awareness in them.
Feel your knees and balance your attention evenly between them.
Feel your thighs and then your pelvis.
Notice the feeling of gender in your pelvis. Don’t think about gender or your ideas about gender. Just feel the quality of your gender energy there, whatever it may be.
Feel your abdomen, from your belly through to your lower back. Feel the quality of power here. Again, you are feeling these spaces by feeling them from the inside out. Don’t just notice the surfaces but penetrate through from within.
Feel your chest from within. Notice the potential space here for emotion. All emotions can pass through this space and there is still room.
Feel your shoulders and arms and hands.
Feel your neck. Notice the potential you have to communicate, the infinite ways you have available to you to express yourself.
Feel your head. Feel the mask of your face through to the back of your head. Inhabit this space fully. Notice the potential space you have for understanding, perceiving, and gleaning insight.
Now inhabit every part of your body fully from your feet to your hands to your head.
Feel the space around you and feel it being continuous with the space inside your body.
Breathe easy and allow yourself to simmer.
When you feel like it, open your eyes.
This kind of exercise is generally called a “body scan” and it is very helpful to do. I try to find time during my morning routine to do one before starting the day.
It will help you. But also read that book. And don’t discount seeing a therapist–that can be very helpful.
The following is the essay I wrote for my medical school application. After sharing it with my sister, she suggested it share it here as well.
When I was in the seventh grade, my father suffered a bicycle accident that left him paralyzed and ended his career. Five years later he was diagnosed with melanoma. He died the summer before I graduated high school.
Often as a child people asked me if I wanted to follow in my father’s footsteps; he had been a renowned pediatric neurosurgeon. I always declined. I think secretly I was holding out for my invitation to attend Hogwarts.
But after my father’s death I strongly questioned the meaning in life. I couldn’t understand why we valued things like wealth, status, and ambition when it all ends in death. You take nothing with you; what you leave does not last.
During my time in college, I explored this existential direction further. I took classes that dealt with subjects such as Quantum Physics and Cognitive Science, seeking perspective on existence and awareness. But my inquiries fell short of the mark with no definitive revelations within sight.
It wasn’t until I began a daily meditation practice that my search changed. Instead of studying consciousness in books, I was experiencing it directly. Instead of approaching life outside-in, looking at cells and particles, I explored sentience from the inside-out.
A few years into my practice, I began reading studies from prominent neuroscience departments such as those of Harvard and the University of Wisconsin Madison. They were discovering the ways in which meditation physically restructured the brain, altered life on a cellular level, and impacted the workings of entire systems within the body. I marveled at the manner in which science helped to make intangible phenomena more approachable to our understanding.
Lazy yogi, I notice that I get too attached to people, especially in relationships. When they are finished I am left feeling alone and hurt because I became so attached to this person. How do I not become so attached to people? Thank you :)
Attachment really isn’t feeling sad when we part ways with people. It is okay to feel sad. But when we resist the sadness, when we struggle inside ourselves, that is the attachment. It is an inner disharmony, an unacceptance of outer changes.
The big clue here is in feeling alone. When we feel alone or lonely, we often don’t take the time to let ourselves feel that way. Instead, we try to fill that hole with something or someone else.
Then it isn’t so much love and inspiration driving our decisions but rather loneliness. We start wanting things we don’t really want but just hope will cover up the pain and mute the pangs of fear.
However, alone-ness does not mean isolation. You can be totally by yourself in nature and still be connected with everything in the cosmos. It can never be any other way, as you came from the cosmos the way a fruit comes from a tree.
Until you know yourself in this way, who outside you could ever give you lasting peace? Once you stop trying to fill the hole, the lightless light of the divine is allowed to make itself known from within.
A book that will help you to open and enliven your heart while meeting painful challenges is The Places That Scare You by Pema Chodron. I highly recommend it.
Hello Lazy Yogi! Does romantic love truly exist? When you feel unconditional love for the universe, in which way can you feel something different towards a special person? Is it only desire that makes romantic love what it is? Btw, you are wonderful! :*
Romantic love is certainly possible. Love is love. Desire is desire.
When we talk about something like unconditional love for the universe, what is the universe about which we are talking? Are you apart from the universe such that you can stand aside and love it like you would a puppy?
The sage Adi Shankara once said: “Brahman is real. The universe is unreal. The universe as Brahman is real.”
Brahman is sometimes defined as “the unchanging reality amidst and beyond the world.”
This means to say that the universe as we commonly think of and perceive it, as a collection of objects in space and time, is unreal. By “unreal,” it is meant that it is not as we perceive and conceive of it.
Like a coil of rope seen in the darkness of the night is mistaken for a snake, the limitless and timeless expanse of Existence-Awareness-Bliss is mistaken for “the universe.” The unreal-ness of the snake doesn’t mean that nothing is “there.” It means that what is ”there” isn’t being known with clarity.
So coming back to the topic of love, what does this mean? It means that the unconditional love for the universe is undifferentiated from the unconditional love of the universe. Unconditional love is love without forms, without subject and object. Loving the Universe is also the Universe Loving.
"Love itself is the actual form of God.” ~ Sri Ramana Maharshi
The phenomena that love connects are impermanent. Bodies form and dissipate, circumstances come and go. But the love itself is eternal; it is the natural mood of eternity.
While this kind of love is transcendent of limitation, that does not mean it is without variance in the way it is expressed. This is addressed with wonderful elegance and simplicity in the book The Power of Now.
“Love is not selective, just as the light of the sun is not selective. It does not make one person special. It is not exclusive. Exclusivity is not the love of God but the ‘love’ of ego. However, the intensity with which true love is felt can vary.
There may be one person who reflects your love back to you more clearly and more intensely than others, and if that person feels the same toward you, it can be said that you are in a love relationship with him or her.
The bond that connects you with that person is the same bond that connects you with the person sitting next to you on a bus, or with a bird, a tree, a flower. Only the degree of intensity with which it is felt differs.” Eckhart Tolle
This is how love and its expression is both nondual and transcendent while also being dualistically experienced and immersively present.