LORD-&-TAYLOR

anonymous asked:

favorite places to shop that aren't too expensive?

Hey!
I’ll divide these into 2 Lil sections

Kinda sometimes not that expensive

Nordstrom: I loveeee Nordstrom & honestly you can find some great sales there! Especially with their Trend section!

Lord & Taylor: same situation! They have even more sales that Nordstrom

J.Crew: I very rarely pay full price at j.crew unless I know something is going to sell out. Their 30% off sales are my lifeblood.

Urban outfitters (and free people/anthropologie): everyone can fuck off ok they carry some great brands

Then online retailers like revolve/shopbop/nastygal have a wide range of prices and super cute products!

Average

I love GAP and I’m uninterested in counter arguments

Nike: I am a big fan of sweatpants

Aerie!! Everything is so soft :) and smells good :)

Lulus: it’s an online retailer but I get a lot of going out clothes from there/actually got my NYE dress from there (they sell a mix of like fun wear once or twice party pieces and high quality brands)

Boohoo is so cheap it’s ridiculous and every time I get something from there I’m shocked how well it fits me/holds up!

So, I went to Lord & Taylor with my mom. I had on soffee shorts, a concert tshirt, and my hair was up in a messy bun. The looks all these bitchez were giving me were literally like I had just shot someone. Like I’m sorry i didnt dress up in fucking designer clothes to go to a store. They all looked like they had something up their ass. You know what it was? Their dam ego.

Lord & Taylor, Stamford, Connecticut. A midcentury modern department store building designed in 1969 by architect Andrew Geller who was better known for his modern beach houses in the Hamptons built in the 50’s and 60’s. At the time he was the in-house architect for the design firm Raymond Loewy/William Snaith Inc. Raymond Loewy is known as the “father of industrial design”. He worked on the Studebaker and amazing trains of the 30’s and 40’s.He designed Greyhound buses and Coca Cola vending machines. He also designed the Shell, Exxon, TWA and BP logos. And the Lucky Strike package.

Having a Body

I rarely shop for clothes because the success rate is less than that of a cheetah defending a kill. (low) Today, there are crazy sales at Lord & Taylor. I needed a suit. Maybe I’d walk out of there with a mouth full of Hugo Boss blood. What?

After work I run over and zip up to the 10th floor, loving the options… the colors… and the PRICES! Oh, MY! I eventually get tired of not know what the fuck I’m looking for and recruit a very nice salesman. “I want something light and with a pleat. Maybe a fall color with four buttons down the front. I want something that will ride low on the neck.” That’s what I didn’t say. I said: “I want to buy one. Maybe two.”

We started at Calvin Klein. “What size are you,” he asked.

“I have no idea, man, but I’m bigger than I look.”

“I’ll try you on a 44R.” He helps me into the jacket, pulls at the too-tight shoulders then, unsuccessfully, tries to button it. “Hmmm… I call that the ######. (Some word in Italian that I’m sure means fat fuck.)”

“Sorry! When did THAT happen, right?” I laugh.

He doesn’t laugh. "I don’t know, but it happened,“ he says staring at my torso. "Let’s go to Joseph Abboud. It’s about the same prices and might be a better fit.”

At this point, he’s not even looking for style, just to see if something will fit on my body. “Yeah, sorry. I’m kind of shaped like a barrel.”

He doesn’t laugh/comment as he looks over Joseph’s jackets.  "Let’s try a 45.“

I put it on. He picks at the too-tight shoulders. "Relax.”

“I am relaxed.”

He, unsuccessfully tries to button it.

“Relax.”

“I am. These are my shoulders, man.”

He pulls it off me, so disappointed. “Hmmmm….”

“Are you saying I’m doomed? That I should go to Men’s Warehouse?”

“We’ll give Ralph Lauren a shot. He could work,” as if Ralph was a genie in a bottle.

“Sure.”

When we get there, he pulls one off the rack in ½ second and holds it up for me to put on. My buddy seems like he’s given up on me. “46R. Good. Now turn to me.”

I do. He picks at the too-tight shoulders again, looks me up and down.

“Sorry,” I say, again apologizing for having a body. I always thought I’d be better as a primordial puddle.

He pulls the jacket off me like a bull fighter snapping the cape off a bull’s head. “We don’t have anything for you.”

Anything for me? I don’t get it. What?”

“Nothing here will fit you.”

“Ok…” I look him over to make sure he’s serious. “Wow. Ok. Sorry."