So, this was requested by @moonieraver and it is something I had already had the workings of written in my Google Docs.
This is something that hits very close to home for me. My wife and I spent years in an international LDR (we met on Tumblr years ago, actually!) so I know the ups and the downs, the ins and the outs of LDRs. So while I don’t normally do requests anymore, I had this one mostly written and I can’t say no to something so close to my heart.
This can either be done when you are together physically, or over Skype (bc I know you live on FaceTime), whatever is best for the two of you!
lavender - happiness
rosemary - love
chamomile - balance
thyme - courage
cedar chips/shavings - confidence in each other
Starting out, light a candle that you want to seal your jar with (if you want to seal it– you can use anything you can close up and wont spill these things out) and stating your intent. Imagine the flame and the heat spreading the intent through the candle.
Layer your ingredients, even maybe take time to talk to each other about how you see each layer manifesting itself in your relationship. You are welcome to include something of the other person’s as well in the jar, even if it is something that reminds you of them.
If you feel like it ever needs a kick, don’t hesitate to stick in in the full moon light, I try to do this with any jars I am working with currently or want to keep using.
Wishing you the best in this really tough situation– I know it sucks, it’s a long process and can definitely test any relationship. But I will say that any LDR I know that has worked out are the strongest couples I know. Magic is no replacement for commitment and hard work in a relationship, this just helps boost you along a bit easier.
My other jars can be found here, and all my other original posts here.
Chelsea ( @opensmother-lippedlover ) and I ( @jessjust ) met December 5, 2012 on Tumblr (Yup, I remember dates well). Immediately I noticed how sweet, polite, and interesting she was. We continued to talk here and there, and making our relationship official months later. We dated for about six-months. Initially everything was great, but the long-distance was awful and we were too young to know how to handle it. We called it off. We went our separate ways; fell in-love here and there with other people.
Years later I was working for the Texas Legislature, near done with my undergrad degree, and with the flexibility to move anywhere. I then realized how much I kept thinking about her, wishing to share the precious memories I was making at my job, how supportive and uniquely proud she would be — and truly how much love I still had for her. Not knowing where she was in life I decided to reach out to her, told her how I felt and she left me waiting (lol) Some time later she finally came around and told me she felt the same way. Well the rest is really history.
(The day she asked me to be her girlfriend)
We left Philadelphia and houston, and we moved to Chicago after I got a scholarship at DePaul Law School, and she began her education to become a Veterinarian. Most importantly we created our own little family with our baby Gatsby, a cavalier King Charles Spaniel. Now I’m proud to call her my fiancée. I would give my life for her.
We’ve had bumps here and there like any other couple, but we love each other enough to fight for each other. That’s what’s important. And why I proposed December 17, 2016 at the art institute!
She may still get mad at me when I forget to place the new toilet paper in the holder and I may still get annoyed when she talks through a movie. All in all, that’s what a relationship is about loving each other and ironing out the little differences.
We want to share our little story with details sometimes left out by the media. With our relationship on the spotlight I hope this encourages others to love and work hard for their relationships ❤️ love is out there, it’s just hard to keep.
(This is an old video Chelsea’s dad filmed of the first time we saw each other again after years apart)
More photos of the engagement can be found in our Instagrams: Cnicolem_ and J.essrdgz
I moved out of my house on really bad terms. My mom didn’t want me to meet my girl that I met on Tumblr who just happened to live in of all places Nebraska. I asked her once in February and told me if I went to meet her, I’d be kicked out of the house.
I ain’t have no money to live on my own so I stayed and didn’t fly to Nebraska. I saved for months, got my 401k contributions high, increased and improved my credit and asked my mom one last time in September. She said the same thing. Two days later, in the middle of the night, I snuck out, my homegirl drove me to the airport and with all my clothes, I flew from NYC to Omaha.
The two of us finally met after a year and I got an apartment and a job within 2 weeks. My entire family was distraught and pissed. They finally realized that I’m out here as long as my girl is in college and left it. They’re still hurt but they know they can’t change it.
Then in February, I got fired from my job. For 4 full months, I’ve been looking for a job, paying rent with my credit card, 401k money and my tax return money. I literally was (and still am) in the negative with all my accounts. I haven’t bought food for myself in almost a full month. I was sleeping at my girl’s mom’s house for almost weeks straight cause I ain’t have food in my place. If I didn’t start a job this week, I’d have to move back to NY into my mom and grandparents’ house.
Last weekend my mom actually came to Omaha to see my first apartment. She met my girlfriend, her family and I took her around the city of Omaha a little bit. When she first opened my fridge, there was old butter, jelly, an almost empty jar of minced garlic and some raspberry lemonade. She told me she almost cried seeing I had no food. When she left I had a full fridge of food. I started a job Monday. I just sent her a picture, one of the first meals I’ve been able to cook from my own fridge since May.
I just wanted to thank her for helping me when she really ain’t need to.
long distance sucks the life out of me because i mean i would give anything to see his face and grab his ass but I can’t but some of you guys get to do that every day and you don’t value any of it. it makes me so mad because you don’t understand what i go through. i am constantly fighting a battle against distance for which i am not even slightly equipped but some of you don’t have too. he’s a phone call away so please put your big ass ego on the side and call him. because you’ll miss all of it once he’s far away. i would kill for a kiss right now or even a hug but i have to wait another three months for any of it. long distance sucks the life out of me.
kiss me some more before you leave tonight because who knows if they will be a tomorrow. kiss me a little more passionately tonight because who knows if there will be a tomorrow. kiss me a little more sloppily tonight because who knows if there will be a tomorrow. kiss me just a little tonight because i know there will be no tomorrow for us and i need to get used to the fact that you are no longer mine to kiss tomorrow night.
I want to follow her around with my camera, capturing every curve of her body, every freckle, at every time of the day. I want to take a million pictures together like every perfect tumblr couple and actually BE that in love with one another. I want to bring her breakfast in bed. I want to snuggle up to her after and relax our morning away with laughter and touch and lazy naps. I want to look at her at 11:00pm and suggest ice cream, and the keys are already in her hand. I want to hold her hand and never question whether it’s okay, no matter where we are. I want us to record everything- our love notes, our adventures, our running makeup after a hard day. I want to bring her coffee and a sandwich when she’s having a long day at work. I want to leave her notes on her windshield… and in her glovebox, her makeup bag, her sock drawer, her glasses case… anywhere. Just to make her heart smile. I want us to find so much joy in life outside of one another but still call each other home. I want to not see one another for a few days because we’re both so damn busy with our professional lives- but I want to miss her endlessly while we’re apart. I want to sit with her in a coffee shop in silence, absorbed in our books. I want to be slightly less absorbed than she is so I can still sneak glances at that beautiful, oblivious face. I want us to feel and be secure and safe no matter the distance between us because we trust and believe in our relationship. I want my family to love us together so much that they invite HER family over sometimes, too. I want to spend hours getting to know her family. I want to cook for her. Bake for her. Light the candles for her. I want to be her rock, and I want her to be mine. I want her to make mistakes, because that means she’s human (but don’t try and convince me she isn’t an angel). I want to lay in bed talking about the world until we fall asleep in each other’s arms. I want her to challenge me. I want to spend weekends in the woods and weekdays in pillow forts. I want to hike mountains with this girl. I want to marry her and have children with her. I want to love her so hard I’ll question whether I’m crazy. And after long, hard days- because there undoubtedly will be days like that- I want to look at her and not for a single moment wish I was anywhere else, with anyone else. I want to look at her and choose her every day, in every moment. I want to never, ever stop choosing her.
You’re out there somewhere. And I know I’m the luckiest girl alive just knowing I’ll get to love you forever someday.