Self love can be getting rid of your smartphone if you notice the constant feeling of being digitally connected and always having to be available is what’s stressing you most. Self love can be quitting that course that is consuming all of your happiness, even though you really wanted to finish it this time. Self love can also be looking for help to actually be able to finish the course - a friend to talk to, a therapist, a tool to help you cope with stress better. Self love can be admitting you’re not doing well and you think you relapsed. Self love can be committing to handing in your tax report on time to reduce the anxiety it causes to finish it last minute, like you usually do. Self love can be getting out of this toxic relationship, finally saying no to your partner and yes to yourself and your wellbeing. Self love is learning to keep your own promises you have to yourself. Self love can be taking a bath and using this fancy bath bomb, yes, but more often it will be steps that are born based on insight, steps that will give you a peace of mind long term, even though in this very moment you don’t feel like taking them. The small steps of self love matter as much as the bigger ones. The bigger ones are in fact often many small steps added up.
Self love is not just temporarily doing what feels nice and what calms your nerves in a specific moment. Ask yourself this one very important question whenever you’re in doubt:
is this step that I’m about to take truly based on love for myself, or am I just temporarily trying to avoid pain/pressure/discomfort? Am I being aware of what I’m doing or am acting led by a pattern that I actually want to overcome? Is this truly good for me and my soul?
Allow yourself to take breaks. Allow yourself to reflect. To feel the emotions that want to be felt. Learn to read the signs and to listen to yourself. Rebuild the trust in your own decision making. It’s totally okay if you need help from someone to learn to listen to yourself again. It’s okay to ask for helping hands, open ears and shoulders to cry on. You got this. I believe in you 100%.