KLUTCH

Passive Aggressive

Part: one

Jasmine was used to all the Aladdin jokes and the flashes of cameras. She was used to all the rumours and the ill concealed jealousy that floated around online.

She was used to a lot of things that came with One Direction. Well, that came with dating Harry Styles of One Direction.

But there were a few things she wasn’t used to. Like drinking orange juice with juicy bits, and waking up to a bed without Harry beside her.

A one shot where Harry’s a bit of an asshole and all Jasmine really wants is for him to show her his world.

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Rereading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince: Chapter Ten - The House of Gaunt

HI GUYS sorry its been a while lets get going 

dis about to be depressing 

- ok i hate snape as much as the next gal but DAMN if hes not a bomb as potion master

- honestly tho why didnt dumbledore just invite ron and hermione to these meetings like he knows harrys gonna just tell them everything afterwards. save everyone a lot of time and effort.

- LOL trelawney is wandering through the halls drunk and ive never related to her more

“This time, you enter the Pensieve with me… and, even more unusually, with permission.”

lolol nice burn albus. i mean, HES NOT WRONG

- hi bob ogden!!!! this must be your little worst memory huh?

As the dark shadows of the trees slid over him, he stopped again, staring at the front door, to which somebody had nailed a dead snake.

uhh thats the cue to GTFO BOB

- ok this chapter is actually really freaky. all my roommates are gone as im typing this IM SCARED YALL

The man standing before them had thick hair so matted with dirt it could have been any color. Several of his teeth were missing. His eyes were small and dark and stared in opposite directions. 

hot. 

- awe shit harrys parseltongue coming in klutch here

“Are you pure-blood?” he asked, suddenly aggressive.
“That’s neither here not there,” said Ogden coldly, and Harry felt his respec for Ogden rise. 

ME TOO HARRY, ME TOO. the gaunts are like your redneck cousins that dont even try to pretend theyre not racist 

- seriously i forgot how fucking creepy this chapter is i dont like it i wanna leave

She looked a little cleaner than the two men, but Harry thought he had never seen a more defeated looking person.

merope :’(

Merope had dropped on of the pots.
Pick it up!” Gaunt bellowed at her. “That’s it, grub on the floor like some filthy Muggle, what’s your wand for, you useless sack of muck?”
“Mr. Gaunt, please!” said Ogden in a shocked voice, as Merope, who had already picked up the pot, flushed blotchily scarlet, lost her grip on the pot again, drew her wand shakily from her pocket, pointed it at the pot, and muttered a hasty, inaudible spell that caused the pot to shoot across the floor away from her, hit the opposite wall, and crack in two.

seriously this sucks. 

- AW SHIT THE GAUNT RING HAS APPEARED 

- AND THE LOCKET OMG harry i hope youre paying attention 

My daughter - pure-blooded descendant of Salazar Slytherin - hankering after a filthy, dirt-veined Muggle?
Merope shook her head frantically, pressing herself into the wall, apparently unable to speak. 
But I got him, Father!” cackled Morfin. “I got him as he went by and he didn’t look so pretty with hives all over him, did he, Merope?
You disgusting little Squib, you filthy little blood traitor!” roared Gaunt, losing control, and his hands closed around his daughters’ throat. 

i sympathize with merope for being a victim of abuse in a house hold thats bigoted not only against everyone around her but also just HER herself. but then im definitely not on board with the whole forcing tom riddle sr to marry her and basically rape him stuff. what is your opinion on merope? genuinely curious i wanna know someone inbox me LETS DISCUSS

- this is all info dump that im not gonna quote but this is juicy ass chapter

“Sir… is it important to know all this about Voldemort’s past?”
“Very important, I thin,” said Dumbledore.
“And it… it’s got something to do with the prophecy?”
“It has everything to do with the prophecy.”
“Right,” said Harry, a little confused

this is everyone conversation has with dumbledore ever. vagueness and confusion. thats the whole thing. 

WELP if you liked this, follow me for more chapters!

10

ART SCHOOL | Jack Graydon (OR) | Vans US Open of Surfing 2017

Our next featured artist and participant in this year’s 2017 Vans US Open of Surfing is out of Portland, OR, artist Jack Graydon aka Tolietsnake.  This traveling, skating, and painting talent has been creating his works for some time now–from walls to trucks and hidden places in Thailand. Graydon’s style is never stagnant or stiff, but rather ever-changing, adapting and exploring its boundaries, much like the artist himself. We’re stoked to feature Graydon’s work and find out his approach to large scale murals, how he started painting, and what event he’s looking forward to seeing at this year’s 2017 Vans US Open of Surfing. 

Photographs courtesy of the artist | Portrait by Tobias Lee

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Message in a Bottle (1/4?)

Prompt:  I found a cute little message in a bottle you wrote when you were little and decided to come find you and share it with you but god I didn’t expect you to be so hot wth AU

 Thanks to @nothingimpossibleonlyimprobablefor continuously poking, prodding, threatening, bribing, and otherwise pushing me to write and post this.  I really wouldn’t have kept going without it.

ps - “cute” - I’m not entirely sure what that word means.  The definition is something like “heartbreaking”, right?
(not nearly as heartbreaking as Never Say Goodbye, I promise.)
tagging: @lenfaz, @shady-swan-jones, @woofiefangirl

Also on AO3 and FFN (the formatting is way better on AO3)


Chapter 1: Adrift


October 23, 1992

Dear Prince Charming,

Well, you’ll probably be Captain Hook anyway, knowing my luck.  My name is Emma Swan, it’s my birthday today, and I’m in 4th grade.  My teacher says we have to write these letters so we can throw them in the Charles River and see how far they go once they make it to the ocean.  I don’t think anyone is going to find mine.  Nothing cool like that ever happens to me, so it doesn’t really matter what I write.  

I’m living with the Klock Kluczk “Klutch-cow-skies” this month.  They suck.  I miss living with Mrs. Welch.  Her husband wasn’t around that much, and I guess it’s cuz he liked another lady better.  But he was better than Mr. Klocz… he wants me to call him “daddy”, but I don’t have one of those.  Or a mom.

Anyway, we’re supposed to ask a question so that you have something to answer when you find this.  In the ocean.  Which is huge.  So it’s never gonna happen.  Caroline’s will probably get found.  Or Mikey’s.  The cool stuff always happens to them.  They each have a mom and a dad and Christmas presents and brand new clothes that no one else has worn.  I bet they never had to pack in a trash bag.

So my question is this.  If you’re reading this, and you are a Prince Charming… or even if you’re Captain Hook, can you come save me or kidnap me or something?  Come take me away, I don’t care where.  I just want someone to adopt… never mind, this was stupid anyway.

Emma Swan
10 Guest St
Home for Little Wanderers

Boston, MA

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