Josh Malina

9

10 actors: Bradley Whitford

It’s so much fun, as we can see everyday, to shame and humiliate people who you disagree with politically, but it does not get anything done.

  • Dulé Hill: There were times when the giggles would just happen, especially in the Oval Office. You would just get delirious. They were always long days. It was a beautiful set, and it looked lovely, but when you have five or six people in the Oval Office, and you gotta keep covering… It became a long day. Hence where I started to come up with my trick.
  • Josh Malina: I was wondering if we were going to get to this! I know exactly where you’re going.
  • Dulé Hill: I always knew exactly how to position myself, if I only had one or two lines, I would guarantee you, in the blocking, I was going to find a way to be in a shot by myself away from everybody else. So by the time we’d do the master, I’d be like, “Uh, excuse me? All I gotta say is, ‘Yes, Mr. President.’ and ‘Thank you, Mr. President.’ So can we just do this pop on me real quick?” Then I would be out!
  • Josh Malina: Unbelievable! I remember I’d be there for the last four hours going, “Where the hell is Dulé? I can’t believe he’s home already.” This is the evolution of an actor: from “Praise the lord! Thank you for this job!” to “I think I know a way to get out four hours early.”
  • Dulé Hill: It’s called The Dulé Hill School of Acting.
Scandal Recap/ Review Heavy Is The Head,  Episode 501

Well wasn’t that a freaking almost flawless episode of Scandal?


When was the last time that happened? Fuck knows. All I know is, I always have a good time when the writers remember who this show is about.


Anyway, I have shit to do so let’s get on with this.

What I Hated


1.  The fact that Jake Ballard appeared on my screen for that one second.  

Yeah I get it, he’s a regular, so the writers have to find something for him to do, but still, he was so pointless in this episode that it just means that I can’t say that the episode was perfect. Death to The Human Vibrator! ( Although truth be told, I wouldn’t be mad if he only had a second worth a screen time every week. I could live with that.)

2.  The Shonda Rhimes recap of season 4 at the beginning of the episode. 


I swear to God, I did not need to go back to season 4. As with season 3, I’m going to pretend that that mess didn’t happen. I’m happy living in denial dammit.



What I Liked


1.  Sally Langston.  

That bible thumping husband- murdering bitch is such a great character, and such a fantastic Big Bad. Her diatribe against Fitz and the White House was pretty awesome. Whoever came up with having her be the female version of Glenn Beck did a great job. 

I thoroughly enjoyed Fitz and Olivia Sodom and Gomorrahing all over the White House to the sound of her judgey, scathing indictment of Fitz, she’s such a great consistant character, and she is played delightfully by Kate Burton. Love!

.
2.  Olitz sexy time!


Hubba Hubba!  For those of you out there who are adult enough to understand that sex is an integral part of any romantic relationship, how freaking hot were Fitz and Liv?
At this point I’m rewinding the mirror scene several times, so bear with me for a moment while I fangirl the fuck out.


Ok, I’m back in the room.


Moving on….

3.  Olitz playfulness and intimacy.


There is something about Olivia and Fitz being playful with each other and their more tender moments that will always give me the warm fuzzies. The hand holding as they walked towards the elevators to go down to the dinner. The hand holding when she answered the phone to the Queen, those sexy slight touches that only Tony Goldwyn knows how to deliver, Liv adjusting his tie, the sexiness of their casual interactions, their intimate eye contact at the dinner, just their whole easy demeanor with each other was wonderful to see. We’ve waited 5 long seasons to see this much development in their relationship, my fellow Olitzers, we deserve this!


4.  Olivia’s State Dinner dress. Swoon!


5.  Liz’s State Dinner dress.  Swoon!



6.  Huck lying on Olivia’s sofa watching the news.


I felt for him, I really did, however I can’t forgive him for A, putting his hands round Liv’s neck, B, slitting Kinky Sue’s throat for no fucking good reason, and C, murdering all those jurors. I hope Shonda can redeem him, because I’m not gonna lie, he’s dead to me until she does.



7.  Abby’s dress and hair. Swoon.



8.  Mellie being banned from attending the state dinner.  


Honestly, the man threw her out a few days ago, and somehow she still thinks that she’s going to be allowed to attend a formal event at the White House? Cry those white tears Mellie, cry them well you entitled, no-pride-having idiot.
Although, I have to say, I did love her dress. Paolo did well dressing the entire cast for the dinner, it’s not often I’ve been able to say that since season two.

9.  Abby:  “Rachel, muzzle your beast, we have a plan.”


I’m here for Abby referring to Mellie as a beast.


10.  Susan being sat next to the queen with her provincial self. 

I howled. 


11.  Abby:  “How long did it take for him to call you?”

Liv:  "Who?”

Liv is so damn shady, but I howled at Abby’s look of cynical disbelief. Technically of course Fitz didn’t call her. He drove to her apartment, then went back home to find his beloved on the Trueman balcony. Lol

12.  Princess Emily catching Abby gossiping about her.


Oops.



13.  Emily: “To them I’m not human, I’m just a spectacle.”

Uh-oh. We know where this is going.

14.  Fitz:  "I’d give them another six months if I could spend it all in this bed.“


We know Fitz. We know son.


He’s such a sex-starved machine and I love it! (Erm remember folks, consensual sex is good, great in fact.)

And Olivia wearing Fitz’s navy shirt! Triple swoon!
Ugh, I love domestic Olitz.

15.  The Princess Emily Car Death scene.

 
Did anybody else have flashbacks to 1997, when Princess Diana was killed in Paris? Man, that was such a sad day. I cried buckets for a woman that I didn’t even know, and had never thought in a million years her passing would effect me the way it did

.
16.  Olivia throwing her Burberry over the dead bloodied princess.



Noooooooo! What was she thinking? That beautiful clean coat!


17.  Olivia being swaddled in some sort of grey sack cloth as she sat talking to the Queen of Caledonia. 



Lyn Paolo, what the fuck was that?



18.  Quinn being the only functional associate left at OPA. 


Man I can’t wait until Liv gets a full team again. Minus The Human Vibrator of course.


19.  David Rosen:  ”There are limits to my power.“

Olivia:  "I seen what you can do with your power David”

David:  “I’ll see what I can do.”

David stays being the most easily manipulated character on the show. Poor thing.


20.  Liz:  [to Mellie] “First, let’s be clear. You did not do anything for me. You did that for you. You only ever do anything for your own benefit. Second, you didn’t take me in. I was your prisoner. I was your puppet. I was your bitch. Third, my payment was that I got you elected. You are sitting in that chair, in this office, a United States Senator, because of me. That is how I repaid you. Fourth, one can only be betrayed if there is loyalty first. I was never loyal to you and you were never loyal to me. I don’t think you’ve ever been loyal to anyone. So when I made my move up the ladder of political success all in my own, I wasn’t even thinking about you. Because you don’t matter to me. And now you also don’t matter to the most powerful man on the face of the Earth.“


Yaaaassss! Read the bitch! This scene was glorious. For the first time, I saw Liz as a decent character that I might take a shine to. As long as she isn’t messing with either Fitz or Olivia. I love that she said all the things every character should have said to entitled Mellie Grant by now. Yay for white feminism.


21,  The scene between Abby and Liz when she’s trying to persuade her to persuade the president to attend Mellie’s swearing in ceremony.


I laughed at how stressed out Abby was throughout this episode.

22.  Olivia hiding from Abby in the White House.


Lol. I don’t know why she just doesn’t tell her. Liv knows that it’s only a matter of time before she finds out anyway. 


23.  Olivia:  "Don’t you have a swearing in ceremony to get to?”

Fitz: “What?”

Olivia:  “Mellie.  

Fitz:  "Liz North and I decided that I’m not going.”

Olivia: What do you mean you’re not going?

Fitz: "Liv”

Olivia: “Don’t Liv me. It’s a hugely public event. If you don’t attend, all it will do is raise questions, and you owe her this.


I loved this conversation between them. I think Olivia was right, and it was very shortsighted of Fitz to think that he could not attend and not have the press give them the journalistic side-eye. I hate Mellie, always will, but for the good of keeping the press off their behinds, I think Olivia’s advice was sound. What I didn’t agree with was the part where Liv mentioned how often Mellie must have done similar things for him even when she didn’t want to.


My answer to that is, bitch wanted to be First Lady so she needed to suck it up. I don’t care about Mellie being embarrassed. The woman went on national TV and outed her husband’s affair, then proceeded to ‘stand by her man.’ when she should have been kicking his ass to the curb like any self-respecting woman would. 


24.  Abby being made to look a fool in front of the White House press corp. 

Man she can’t catch a break. I’m sure she will by the end of the season though…


25.  Mellie thinking that Fitz was at the Swearing In Ceremony to reconcile with her.


God she got on my fucking nerves during this scene. It was so painful to watch her try to show remorse for something that she clearly felt no remorse about. She was just sorry she was caught out.

26.  Mellie:  "I know that without a doubt, that you and I together a team is what’s best. For us, for the country, for our beautiful children, and I’m so glad you see it too.“

Jesus Mellie. How could she fail to see how much of a fuck Fitz couldn’t give about her attempt at apologizing? The man clearly didn’t even want to be in the same room as her. I wish the writers wouldn’t make her so freaking dense.

 
27.  Fitz:  "I’m divorcing you.”


Mellie’s delusions lead to this moment so I felt not one ounce of sympathy for her. 


Sidebar, can I just mention how awful Mellie’s wig was in this episode. It doesn’t even look like it belongs in her head any more.


28.  Mellie:  "I’ll never sign.“

Fitz:  ”You will. You have so many qualities I despise, but I do admire your brilliance. So do the math, Mel. Fighting this, fighting me, will mean both of us deploy every weapon in our arsenals. Every lie, every secret, every juror on that bus. Mutually assured destruction. We’ll be ruined. Now me, I’m a war hero, governor, two-time President. My bucket list is done. You? Your biggest accomplishment so far is waving and smiling. It’s your first day……you’ll sign.“

Damn, Fitz went in hard. I loved that his delivery had an eery calmness to it. Way more effective than shouting. I’m not crying any tears for Mellie. She has enough white tears of her own. At this point she should be trying to scheme ways to burn him, but alas, we have her quivering lip and doggy eyes. 


29.  Olivia:  ”Divorce papers?“

Fitz:     ”I thought you’d be happy, you don’t look happy.

Olivia:  ”No. I… I’m just surprised. I didn’t know that you were even… Divorce?Fitz:  "I have dragged you into my marriage enough, you shouldn’t have to deal with this.“

Olivia:  ”But we had a plan. Optics, your approval ratings.

Fitz: ”Life is short….. I don’t wanna wait. Ok?

Olivia:  "Ok.“

Fitz:  ”This is good.

Olivia:  ”This is good.

Ugh, I loved this conversation. We can obviously see how uncomfortable Olivia is with the idea of Fitz giving Mellie divorce papers so soon, but I was so Team Fitz right here. In my mind, if they were going to be cavorting around the White House, not being very discreet, it was only a matter of time before they’d get caught, and Fitz having at least filed for divorce might make a small difference to how this all plays out. And no I didn’t think they’d be outed in the first episode back. But we’ll get to that later.


30.  David Rosen proving that he’ll always be Olivia’s lapdog by calling her and letting her know that the car accident was not an accident.



Bless him, he has his uses.



31.  Fitz and Olivia’s epic professional fight (laced with the personal) in front of Liz and David.



Listen you guys. The fact is, I could watch Olivia and Fitz fight, fuck, hold hands, drink tea, cut grass, all freaking day. Their chemistry regardless of what they’re doing is off the chain. It’s so good to have that back this season. I saw some people talking about how Fitz treats Liv so badly. These people have clearly never been in a relationship before if they think that spouses shouting at one another automatically equates to being toxic or being treated badly.  How old are the fucking morons who watch this show? I wish they’d go out and get some fucking life experience. Or have sex. Or something.


I love how uncomfortable David and Liz looked.  I cackled. 



32.  Huck:  "Are you back? Are you sleeping here? Are you back?”
Olivia: “Have you been waiting for me to come home? I’m your plan?
Huck: You always fix me….my guy is out Liv, he’s running around and I can’t go home until you fix me.”


This entire conversation was heartbreaking. It really was, but I need for Olivia to get Huck professional help. Except of course he’s a murderer so who can he confide in? Sigh.
I understand that to a certain degree, Olivia had a hand in him getting this bad, however I’m not going to absolve Huck of his agency in order to blame Liv for the way he is.  Huck was already broken when Olivia saved him. Her mistake was asking him to let his beast out in episode 105. He hasn’t been the same since, however him asking Olivia to fix him when she doesn’t even know how to fix herself? That’s too much. Especially when he killed those jurors for Rowan because of something he wanted, his family. Olivia was right to tell him that he needed a better plan than her. She fixes other people’s problems, she doesn’t fix people, and she never has. It was all an illusion, when she felt she wore the white hat. She’s not the same person anymore. She can no longer lie to herself. She’s as broken as everybody else. She has a hard enough time trying to fix herself. I’m so glad she finally realizes this. Growth for my favorite. Heart-eyes motherfucker.



33.  Olivia: Huck, did Quinn hurt you on the inside?
Huck: Yes. But I hurt her too. We hurt each other. But I didn’t try to kill her.


Well that’s ok then Huck.
Seriously Liv, the man needs a good therapist. I’m so glad you recognized that fixing people isn’t in your skillset these days…



34.  Lizzie:  "She didn’t waste any time did she?  Olivia Pope is in the White House, which means that she’s in the president’s bed, which means she’s up in our business.“


Poor Abby, totally blind-sided again. Her story arc reminds me of David Rosen’s in season two, when he couldn’t catch a break, then at the season’s end, it turns out that he saves the day. I’m assuming that Shonda has the same plan for Abby.
I really wish that Olivia had confided in her though, but I guess that’s not who she is.



35.  Mellie telling Cyrus that they could have eight more years together if he’d just help her talk Fitz out of a divorce. 


Honestly, when people come into my inbox defending this chick, I feel fully justified in excoriating them because here her husband has told her in no uncertain terms that he wants a divorce, and she’s still trying to fight it. What are you fighting for Mellie? The man doesn’t love you, and even worse, now he doesn’t even respect you. Move the fuck on, or at least start planning your vengeance against him, shit do something for yourself. Buy a new fucking wig, anything!

36.  Mellie:  ”He doesn’t want you Cy. He doesn’t want you. Any more than he wants me. He hates us.“


Gee, it’s like the penny just dropped on her big-assed wig, and knocked some sense into her.  


Speaking of wigs,  am I the only one who noticed how terrible Bellamy’s wig was in this scene? What a mess. It was huge and resembled a bird’s nest. I was fully expecting some newly hatched chicklings to come flying out of her hair at any moment.  


37.  Olivia:  ”The princess was pregnant.


At this point I figured out that the Queen had had her daughter-in-law murdered. She looked a stone-cold bitch.

38.  The Queen:  ”She had one job. To give us an heir and a spare. And that single job she failed"

I was right.  That was cold man.



39.  The Queen:  "Not all fairy tales have happy endings my dear.


I wish people would stop telling Olivia that.  Bitch, she of all people knows.


40.  Queen:  ”What’s she doing here?

Richard:  ”You hired her, the same way you hired the man who murdered my wife. Your non-disclosure agreement didn’t apply to me. So when we get home you’re going to abdicate because of health reasons. Because of age. Because you’re no longer fit to rule…..the next time I see you, the next time I will even be able to tolerate the sight of you, will be at your funeral.  If you oppose me, if you speak out in any way, Olivia Pope may not be able to tell the world what you’ve done, but I won’t hesitate.“



Olivia figured a way to get justice for Emily.



41.  Olivia:  ”You were right, not all fairy tales have happy endings, but evil queens? They tend to go down.“


Go Liv, Gladiate up in that bitch!


I refuse to include the next scene because, just ugh.

Anyway, the next scene was just wonderful.

42.  Olivia:  ”I want you. I want us. But I want to slow down. I want our business handled. I want our problems fixed. I want to be ready before the world is watching because once it is, once we’re in that spotlight being picked at and scrubbed and stretched in every direction we will never get the chance to make things right. If we are broken going in, we’re not getting out. They will destroy us. That’s reality, Fitz.


*Sob* My babies are growing up at last.


The thing is, she’s right. The moment the news gets out about their relationship, the glare on them would be hard to get over. Hard to live with, and it would probably break them up. Not many couples could survive that kind of intense scrutiny, (look at all those damned Housewives shows, and reality shows in general) let alone a married president trying to make it with his long time mistress.
This isn’t to say that I don’t think Fitz should have filed for divorce. I still think that was the right move, but there’s no way he could come out publicly so soon with Liv and her not suffer the consequences. Like he said to Mellie, he’d be fine, it’s Olivia who would suffer. All her achievements destroyed in a moment. Having to live the rest of her life branded as a black whore. By both blacks and whites. America will forgive a white man of any wrong doing, but it’s a totally different story for a black woman. Hell, black woman’s bodies aren’t even important enough to protect. They aren’t even considered to be human by a subset of Americans. So here, I’m so Team Olivia. 

43.  Fitz:  ”Ok, we wait, until we’re ready.


God these two break my heart. This was the biggest progression in their relationship to date, that we’ve seen. It’s what Olitzers have been crying out for. There is enough drama in them being together, nobody needed that raggedy assed triangle that Shonda subjected us to for two seasons.



44.  Abby: ”Sir, there’s something you need to see.“



Seriously, how is Abby and everybody and his dog able to get into the White House private residence??? 


The look of guilt on Olivia’s face though, not just because she’d been caught canoodling with the president, but because she’d lied to Abby about it. The look of betrayal on Abby’s face was heartbreaking too. Their relationship is about to get majorly tested. I want them to stay besties dammit!



45.  Sally Langston:  ”I have it on good authority, that the trusted adviser, Olivia Pope, has found her way into the president’s bed.  Before the high minded liberal feminist elite media begin howling charges of slander, these are not merely rumors, these are facts. Photos of Miss Pope, lurking in the residence at the White House after hours.“


Oh my fucking God! I was so shocked I can’t even tell you. This was the last thing I expected this episode. I fully expected Fitz and Olivia to go on hiding their relationship and sneaking around. Now they can’t do that. And you know what, perversely, I am so glad. This is movement and progression in their story. I want to see how they’re going to navigate this. Of course Liv has been outed once before, but this time, there are photographs. There’s no denying their affair this time. Time to come clean. Poor Liv. Her absolute worst nightmare is about to come true. What is she going to do? What would she tell her clients to do?


For me, the fact that Fitz filed for divorce before they got caught makes all the difference in the world. It’s the difference between a man cheating on his wife, behind her back, and a man who’s wife clearly knew something was up.  As far as optics goes, it perhaps shows that Fitz never intended to cheat on his wife, willy nilly. For all that’s worth. The blowback will squarely land on Olivia though. Poor Liv. If I was her, I’d straight up try finding a way of revealing that Sally murdered her husband. The self-righteous wind-bag.


Anyway, moving on, I think this is why the word "Throuple” has been thrown round a lot in all the Scandal promos. I think a lot of what happens next will depend on Mellie, and what she does.  They need each other,, and she can’t just throw Fitz and Olivia under the bus, not when her hands are so dirty.  She could of course go the naive wife who didn’t know that her husband was cheating on her route, but this is Shonda, I don’t think she’ll take that route. I think between the three of them, they’re going to come up with a solution. What that is, I have no idea, but I’m looking forward to seeing if I’m right.

Who do we think outed Liv by the way? Knowing Shonda, it won’t be the obvious. It won’t be Mellie, or Cyrus. It won’t even be Lizzie or Abby.  My bet is on Huck.  He has the technical know-how to hack into White House security cameras, and he knew Liv was spending her nights there.  I hope it doesn’t turn out to be him, but I bet it is. Eek.


Final Thoughts

As much as I enjoyed this episode, I couldn’t help but wonder which parts Shonda will reverse in the finale. If nobody else has noticed, that’s her thing. She reverses everything in the finale.  Will it be Happy Olivia and Fitz that she reverses?  Olivia and Fitz being in a good place while everybody else is scrambling to get used to the new world? Will she somehow put Mellie and Fitz back together? Will Fitz be the one walking out of the White House while Mellie is sworn in as president? 


I already know that whatever happens, the finale will see Mellie smelling of roses, finally  getting what she wants, but man I’ll be mad as hell if it’s at the expense of Olivia.
Anyway, I don’t know why, but I have a better feeling about the finale this time around. Had Fitz and Olivia been happy throughout the episode, I’d have been inclined to believe that they wouldn’t be together by the end of the season. This way, the finale may be about Fitz and Olivia finally successfully navigating being together in public. We’ll see.  


By the way, the next episode is titled “Yes”. What do we think this pertains to?

Yes I’m having an affair with Olivia Pope”?

“Yes, I’m divorcing my wife”?

“Yes I love love Olivia Pope”?


Anyway, to celebrate the triumphant return of Scandal, here are some hot gifs of Olivia and Fitz getting hot and heavy. It truly was a thing of beauty. Fuck the haters.

They are so hot. Your fave OTP could never. Ok, maybe Jamie and Claire from Outlander, but no others! 

I wish. No drinking until my uterus is baby-free…

Lol…