How’s everyone doing?

I’m taking it better than I would’ve anticipated. I may actually be in denial. It’s lame having no Spurs to watch. It stinks cause you know they were capable of winning. Not just the series with the Clippers but the whole thing. They had the group to do it. But they just couldn’t get health and momentum behind them all year. It looked like they had it for a week from March 25 to April 1. Then, even though they continued to win games, they lost it. First Tiago went down again, then Tony got dinged up some more, and just like that their tenuous grip on health and momentum was gone. At least they competed. Missed opportunities and all, they still gave us what will probably be pound for pound the best series of the entire postseason. If they had to go out I’d rather go out in the first round. Less painful and it gives this team its first real offseason in four years. An extra month of rest can’t be a bad thing. The saddest part personally is that it’s unlikely there won’t be at least a few changes next year, and I just really liked this group. But we were lucky to get a second year with this team as it was. The Spurs had never before returned an entire championship roster. I wish they could’ve had a healthier campaign for repeat, but we’ve been lucky. It’s been such an incredible run. Who knows what the future will bring?


I’ve thrown rest, massage, physical therapy, TWO epsom salt soaks and alternating heat and ice at my pulled back muscle.

I skipped a day of training company.

I would really like to get back to rehearsing this act now.

I ran into this wonderful text about childhood and learning. I think it’s resonates well with my Dodo-project ( . It’s written by Karl Ove Knausgaard, from book 1 of his novel My Struggle.

“As your perspective of the world increases not only is the pain it inflicts on you less but also its meaning. Understanding the world requires you to take a certain distance from it. Things that are too small to see with the naked eye, such as molecules and atoms, we magnify. Things that are too large, such as cloud formations, river deltas, constellations, we reduce. At length we bring it within the scope of our senses and we stabilize it with fixer. When it has been fixed we call it knowledge. Throughout our childhood and teenage years, we strive to attain the correct distance to objects and phenomena. We read, we learn, we experience, we make adjustments. Then one day we reach the point where all the necessary distances have been set, all the necessary systems have been put in place. That is when time begins to pick up speed. It no longer meets any obstacles, everything is set, time races through our lives, the days pass by in a flash and before we know what is happening we are forty, fifty, sixty… Meaning requires content, content requires time, time requires resistance. Knowledge is distance, knowledge is stasis and the enemy of meaning.”

Emmeloord 2015

guys where should i get my frank iero tattoo, its joyriding lyrics (i aint show u tho bc i dont waNT someone stealing it RIP) he wrote for me i was thinking maybe my thigh??? bc its fat there and less painful and also i dont want it on my arm tbh



What Good is the Manual if One Has None of the Tools?

There’s been an extension in the applicability of this word, and this new found elasticity raises all kinds of interesting questions sending all kinds of reverberations all over the place. To make my point I’m going to have to talk about WWI, naturally.

You see, the Treaty of Versailles accomplished more than signaling the end of a state of war with, and assigning all blame to, Germany.[1] When you’re talking territorial concessions and reparation amounts and disarmament debates -like you do- international registered trademark law comes up, naturally.

As a result Aspirin lost its status as registered trademark and became a generic word. Moreover, Aspirin lost its singularity and dispersed; becoming less about naming a specific product for pain and more about naming a thing’s utility insofar as its predicated on a relation to alleviating pain.[2]

Analogously, the word “Bible” is no longer tethered to a collection of ancient religious narratives, texts, and poems. It is now entered common parlance to denote a thing’s utility insofar as its predicated on serving as a comprehensive manual for X, where X could be, well, anything, even “restoring furniture.”

And while it may seem that using the word “Bible” as a synonym for “Instruction Manual” endows it with all manner of powers -it actually doesn’t.

The thing is, utility is not inherent but operates at the level of structural relations.
In Logic we might say utility functions according to a Transitive Relation.[3]

So, if xRy and yRz then xRz, where R is a particular relation.

In other words, if there’s a manual for restoring furniture and I would like to restore some furniture, then I should avail myself of said manual.

But what if I don’t have furniture in need of restoration or think my furniture looks better unrestored or have no furniture at all? Then the manual for restoring furniture is of no use to me.

We now use the word “Bible” as a synonym for “instruction manual” because that was the prevalent way of approaching the Bible itself -as an instruction manual. The whole “Bible as an Instruction manual” thing runs into the same relationship issues as the manual for restoring furniture.[4]

If it’s a manual for getting to heaven after I die,

what if I am not at all concerned about that?

If it’s a manual for salvation or redemption,

what if I don’t see myself as in need of either?

If it’s a manual for people struggling with the divine,

what if I don’t find the need to acknowledge, much less struggle, with it?

If it’s a manual for judging this life rightly,

what if, as Deleuze says, I am “done with judgement”?[5]

Because when we come across something claiming to be the furniture’s Bible and it turns out to be filled with tidbits of info on how to do something with furniture, we naturally make the association that the Bible was and/or is a similar kind of manual with a concomitant usefulness.[6] It’s here where a problem may occur because some people, people like me, don’t have the use for the kind of manual you’re trying to push. And so tremendous amounts of energy and resources and brain-power go into successfully creating a market for the manual’s utility.[7] People have to be convinced (converted?) of their unrecognized need to figure out their “eternal destiny” or “how to be forgiven of their sins” or “how to reconcile their doubts and their faith” or “how to please God.” By and large these tactics are focused on a depreciation of this life, as I argued in the previous series.[8]

At this point, the issue gets compounded even further because in order for a thing’s utility to remain viable the need for it must be stable, but needs aren’t stable at all, they’re mobile.[9]

But I digress.

This is why Deleuze’s approach towards (his own) books makes me feel funny in my swimsuit area. He says, 

“All my books are little tool-boxes. If people want to pen them, to use this sentence or that idea as a screwdriver or spanner to short-circuit, discredit systems of power, including eventually those from which my books emerged…so much the better.”[10]

Tool-boxes, not manuals.

Tools for creating, short-circuiting, and experimenting.

Not manuals for instructing, replicating, and maintaining.

When it comes to books we ask “What can we do with this?” and not “What does this mean?” 

We don’t care, and never have cared, what it means.

Our concerns rest in how it functions, how it can be made to function otherwise. 

[1] Article 231 of the Treaty came to be known as “the guilt clause.”

[2] Something similar is occurring today with the word iPad, although to a lesser degree. Most News shows with broadcasters behind a desk that I’ve seen have called their tablet and iPad regardless of the brand. iPad is becoming the name of a tablet in general. This one is still early and I’m sure the sponsor’s wagging finger will correct this soon enough.

[3] or “Transitive Law.” Remember those Logic courses you took? You’ve at least taken Symbolic Logic, right? It was that one course mixing all the boring parts of Math with Latin.

[4] Yes, I just made the claim that the Bible has relationship issues. Nice, huh?

[5] “To Have Done With Judgement” is a theme occupying important section of both Deleuze’s and D+G’s work. I’ll pick this theme up shortly, stay tuned!

[6] The works of different theological strains can then be seen as attempts to write the Bible’s Bible, that is, the instruction manual for the instruction manual. Houston, we’ve gone meta.

[7] viz. Evangelism, Discipleship, and other Churchy things.

[8] That series was given the room-clearing and follower-losing title of “A Blithe Disregard for a Requite Shame for Existing, parts 1-3.”

[9] I’m going to assume you all have some Marxist feathers in your caps and so this argument won’t need to be elaborated upon.

[10] This is from a 1975 essay written with Foucault in the French newspaper Le Monde.

As your perspective of the world increases not only is the pain it inflicts on you less but also its meaning. Understanding the world requires you to take a certain distance from it. Things that are too small to see with the naked eye, such as molecules and atoms, we magnify. Things that are too large such as cloud formations, river deltas, constellations, we reduce. At length we bring it within the scope of our sense and we stabilize it with fixer. When it has been fixed we call it knowledge.
—  Karl Ove Knausgaard, My Struggle (Part I)

fuck anyone who says blueballs isnt real
that shit hurts so bad

its like being punched in the bladder and having your bollocks squished at the same time

i guess its similar to period pain but with less blood leaking from your genitalia

probably not as bad then

literally plucking random hairs off my body because its less painful than sitting down and writing my essay thats preventing me from moving on and studying other subjects. 

I wonder if the fans of the mortal instruments series know that the author has been sued for plagiarism so much. 

I had no idea until recently. Now that I’ve taken a look at some of the fan fiction versions of the books I would be interested in looking at the published books to compare them.

It sounds less painful than comparing 50 shades to its fan fiction.

tagged by chan-yeol-o Thanks my queen<3

Would You Rather

  • Pierce your nose or your tongue: Nose i guess, but i dont want any lol.
  • Drink whole or skimmed milk?: Whole!
  • Die in a fire or drowning?: Drowning, its quicker and less painful.
  • Spend time with your parents or enemies?: Parents.

Are You?

  • Single or in a relationship?: Single!
  • Straight, gay, bisexual, other?: Straight!
  • Tall or short?: Short, around 5′3′‘.
  • Right handed or left handed?: Right.
  • A lover of music or a lover of books?: I love both alot, but i dont read that often so music.

Do You Prefer

  • Flowers or sweets?: Sweets!
  • Color photos or black-and-white photos?: Both can be pretty, but i like colour.
  • Sunrise or sunset?: Sunset.
  • M&Ms or Skittles?: M&Ms!
  • Staying up late or waking up early?: Staying up late, but my definition of late is like midnight lol
  • Sun or moon?: Moon
  • Winter or Autumn?: Autumn :) I love all the reds, oranges and yellows.
  • 10 acquaintances or 2 best friends?: Two best friends is more than enough.
  • Rainy or sunny?: Rainy!
  • Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream?: CHOCOLATE.
  • Vodka or Jack?: I only really drink fruity drinks sooooo…

About You

  • What time is it?: 10:21 AM.
  • Name?: Serena.
  • When is your birthday?: October 1st!
  • What do you want?: I guess my own place?
  • How many kids do you want?: Id like 2, 3 at the most.
  • What would you name a girl?: I’ve always liked the name Asyra.
  • What would you name a boy?: I like Lucas and Nolan.
  • You want to get married?: Yup.


  • Are you double-jointed?: Not at all.
  • Can you roll your tongue?: Yes.
  • Can you raise one eyebrow?: No :c
  • Can you cross your eyes?: I think?


  • Which shoe goes on first?: Usually the right.
  • Ever thrown something at someone?: Yes, quite often.
  • On average, how much money do you carry with you?: I like never have cash on me and it finally kicked my ass when I was dying from hunger after work so I decided to go to McDonalds but the pin machines werent working so they were only accepting cash and I was like “omg but im dying” but i went home to find food instead.
  • What jewelry do you wear?: I wear bracelets and necklaces sometimes.
  • Do you twirl or cut spaghetti?: Twirl. Cutting is strange lol 
  • Have you ever eaten Spam?: Uhm, yes! Its not bad.
  • Favorite ice cream?: I like hazelnut ice cream.
  • How many kinds of cereal are in your cupboard?: Two, Frosted Flakes and Cheerios.


  • Car ride?: Yesterday from work.
  • Song played?: Eyes, nose, lips by Taeyang.
  • Time you cried?: 4 weeks ago? Maybe?

I tag whoever wants to do this :)