me, internally, for the entire day:

*Eva and Drake at the backstage of the tour #WEREMARRIEDANDURNOT including me, J Cole and themselves*

Drake: *breathing heavily* u gon get this dick

Eva: Aubrey:)… we have to perform together in 10 minutes

Drake: Ok and? U and me both know I last 3 minutes so that wont be a problem

Eva: *laughing* Aubrey honey, u last like 15 seconds 

Drake: *covers Eva’s mouth with one hand* EVA! *whispers* I know that but what did I tell you about letting me brag about my non-existent skills during tour? The boys are always around and they might hear you!

Eva: Cmon I’m sure they-

*Chubbs comes out from the bathroom laughing and moves past both of them*


Eva: Hey… baby maybe he didn’t hear it

Drake: Did u not see the look he gave me?

Eva: Why are u so ashamed of the truth anyways Aubrey? Its not that bad babe and they’re your friends

Drake: Eva u dont understand they can be very harsh sometimes and we know that im a little emotional-

Eva: *kisses his nose* Don’t worry honeybun Chubbs won’t tell anyone

*Eva and Drake go to the dressing room holding hands only to find Nicki and Chubbs laughing about something*

Eva: Hey Nicki what yall talkin about

Nicki: Oh nothin just discussing if i should change my lyrics in an upcoming song

Drake: Oh well why didn’t u come to me! You know I’m always down to help u!

Nicki: Okay well.. *giggles and side eyes Chubbs* i was thinking of changing “he only lasts 6 seconds like a vine” to “he only lasts 15 seconds like instagram”

Me: *gagging*