I-WILL-NEVER-BE-OKAY-AGAIN

have you seen her?

Originally posted by teenwxlves

pairings: reader x stiles stilinski.

warnings: meh, a bit angsty, some smut. nothing much. 

a/n: I wasn’t going to publish it in the first place, it was just going to be a little thing I did for my precious bee, @dylan-trash-tbh, however, I though I would risk it and post it. I really hope you all enjoy it!! 

ps.: you might have some characteristics that don’t belong to you, because, as I said, I made this especially to bee and now I’m sharing. haha

word count: 6867


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“Livia.” Julian’s voice rose, cracking and tumbling over itself like a wave breaking far out to sea. “Livvy, my baby, please, sweetheart, open your eyes, it’s Jules, I’m here for you, I’m always here for you, please, please—”

“And there in front of her was Julian, his eyes and ears closed to anything but Livvy, her body cradled against his. She seemed a drift of fragile ash or snow, something impermanent that had blown into his arms accidentally: the petal of a faerie flower, the white feather of an angel’s wing. The dream of a little girl, the memory of a sister reaching up her arms: Julian, Julian, carry me.
But the soul, the spirit that made her Livvy was no longer there: It was something that had gone away to a far and untouchable place, even as Julian ran his hands over her hair again and again and begged her to wake up and look at him just one more time.
High above the Council Hall, the golden clock began to chime the hour.”

—  Cassandra Clare “Lord of Shadows.”
  • thranduil’s heart breaking when legolas stands against him and goes to ravenhill ʘ‿ʘ
  • thranduil immediately going to ravenhill after the battle and searching for legolas among the dead ಠ◡ಠ 
  • thranduil nearly crying when he sees legolas is alright ಠ_ಠ
  • thranduil pretending to be strong when legolas tells him he’s leaving ಥ_ಥ
  • ”your mother loved you. more than anything. more than life.” 
  • (╯ಥ_ಥ)╯彡 ┻━┻

i’m like… so mentally healthy right now like it’s wild. i’ll still feel sad and stuff but in a completely healthy way. 

when i was really bad mentally i never thought i’d be okay again and it would just piss me off when people told me i’d be okay one day, i mean it took a long ass time i got really bad in 2012, 2013 was hell year i literally blocked the whole twelve months out, ask me a thing about 2013 i will not fucking know it, and then i finally started feeling somewhat okay in early 2015 and then i still felt a bit off until like this time last year but since i’ve been like really really really good mentally like i’m not saying my life’s been fantastic w/ no bad shit happening but my mental health has maintained despite the bad stuff that comes w/ life in general… this is a completely pointless post but it’s somewhat therapeutic to write this down 

Happier. // pt. 3

a/n: ahhh it’s heree!! part 3! i absolutely love this part, it’s my favourite so far! if you like this little series and you want me to write a part 4, please let me know!! oh and i’m also working on my masterlist, i hope it’ll be done soon! anyways, enjoy reading! :)

He was pacing around his living room, his phone pressed against his ear.

“No, no. Tell me that’s not true.”

His voice was loud, full of anger.

“I’m sorry, man, but she’s happy now.”

Michael’s voice was a whisper compared to Calum’s.

“Fuck!”

He hung up and threw his phone across the room. His fingers tangled up in his hair, pulling harshly on it. He couldn’t believe she’s in a relationship. He didn’t want to believe she was ready to give her love to someone else. He knew in that very moment that he had to get her back. He had to.

“Calum? What was that? Are you okay?”

His wife walked up behind him, gently resting her hands on his shoulders. He flinched, quickly turning around, breathing heavily.

“Not now.”

“Is it because (Y/N)’s in a relationship now?”

“You know she’s in a relationship?”

“Yes I saw them at a coffee shop a few days ago.”

“And you didn’t care to tell me?”

“I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.”

He didn’t say anything, instead he tried to push past her, wanting to leave the room but his wife quickly grabbed his arm.

“Calum, are you serious? You’re married!! You’re my husband! Why do you still care so much about her?”

He murmured the words underneath his breath as his eyes were focused on the floor.

“Because maybe she is the one for me.”

“What? What was that?”

He pushed her hands off his arm, eyes finding hers.

“I said, maybe she is the one for me.”

His wife’s mouth fell open, her eyes immediately getting teary.

“W-what? Do you hear yourself? You’re out of your mind!! I’m supposed to be the one for you!”

“I have to go.”

And with that he walked towards the front door, leaving his crying wife in their home. As soon as he got into his car he let out a loud scream. An angry, frustrated, sad scream. I need to see her, he thought, I need to fix this.

The whole car ride to her apartment he couldn’t stop thinking about what he was going to say. Would it be good enough to get her back? He was terrified she’d turn him down. But the second her door opened and her eyes met his, his mind went blank.

“Calum?”

“Can I, can I come in?”

She nodded, stepping aside and closing the door once he walked past her.

“What’s up?”

She sat down on her couch, patting the spot next to her, waiting for him to sit down. But he didn’t, instead he stood in front of her, kneeled down and took her hands.

“I talked to Michael, he told me you’re in a relationship now. As soon as he told me, I lost my shit. I know I said that you’re not the one for me, but I was wrong. I love you, so much, I always have and always will and the thought of you not being with me but somebody else hurts. And I know I’ve put you through so much pain and broke you into pieces but I know now that I am married to the wrong woman. I should be married to you, not her. It’s always been you, I was just too stupid to realise that.”

She looked at him with wide eyes. Her hands were shaking a little and she was struggling to even say one word. She sure as hell didn’t expect him to say anything like that.

“Say something, please.”

His words came out as a whisper. She shook her head, pulled her hands out of his and stood up.

“Why now? Why did you have to say this right now? I haven’t felt like everything’s okay in a long time and you decided, once again, to ruin it.”

He opened his mouth, ready to say something but closed it again before the words could slip past his lips. He took a step towards her.

“Be with me again. You said yourself that you’re happier with me. Let me make you happy again, let me fix you.”

She hid her face in her hands, taking a deep breath.

“You made me so unbelievably happy, you did, but you also broke me and it hurt so bad I thought I’d never be okay again. I wish I could just say yes and be yours again but you’re not supposed to look for happiness in the same place you lost it. I’m sorry but I think it’s too late, Cal.”

Sobs took over his body, his eyes turned red and tears were rolling down his puffy cheeks.

“No, no, please. Please give me one last chance. Please. I beg you.”

As soon as her eyes met his, her heart dropped. He looked so broken, it hurt her, but she wasn’t going to allow herself to fall for him again, not anymore. How could she go back to him after everything he put her through?

“I’m sorry, but I think it’s better this way. You should go now, your wife is most likely waiting for you anyways.”

“But I don’t love her, not as much as I love you.”

She took a step towards him, cupping his face with her hands. She laid her forehead against his, closing her eyes.

“I love you, Calum. I always will but we both have to move on. I don’t think we’re good for each other, at least not right now. Who knows, maybe when the timing’s right, we’ll find a way back to each other.”

He nodded, slowly, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist.

“Can I get one last kiss?”

“Yes.”

Within seconds their lips collided, moving together as if they were made for one another. She pulled back a little, their noses touching softly.

“You should go now.”

She took a few steps back, watching Calum as he walked towards her door. He turned around, taking her in one last time. He smiled a little as he opened the door.

“I hope you know that you’ll always be the one for me.”

And with that he closed the door behind him.

i just finished episode 4 and i am absolutely not okay

I can’t believe I’m expected to go into work tomorrow and talk to people about things other than the Omen trailer and listen to them say stuff also not about the Omen trailer and like, be a functional human let alone a functional adult. How are people out there just living their lives right now? Do they not realize how dire things are for Noctis Lucis Caelum Crown Prince of Lucis aka The Anointed King of Light aka The Chosen One who isn’t sure if he’s good enough but he’ll do whatever he has to do he won’t let us down? 

A girl, a hero

When Eri woke, there was a moment of shocked disorientation that took her breath away. The room she was in was dark before her eyes, the surface beneath her not quite harsh and not quite soft.

 

For just a second, an agonizing long moment in time, she was back in her room, the one with the lonely bed amidst unused and unloved toys with which Chisaki and the others had tried to bribe her into trusting them. For a moment, the gentle, kind touch (“It’s alright now, Eri-chan”) was gone, gone, gone and she felt alone and cold and hopeless again.

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“Uncle, we grew up on tales of the Mountain. Tales you told us! You cannot take that away from him!