I still look like a fifteen year old


(( Lol!!!! Um… how about some old high school pics? XD These were from my senior year (god, it’s been five years. :| )

I was in drama… hence the newsies gettup on the bottom left. XP ))

Kate Remembered

*Originally published June 29,2013 at TCM’s Classic Film Union, entitled ‘Kate Remembered:Ten Years Later”*

On June 29, 2003, Katharine Hepburn passed away. I remember hearing the news. I had just gotten into a committed interest with classic films, with her being my jumping off point, and I had dreams of meeting her one day to hear some advice about my growing interest in theatre. It was like a relative you were closed to passing away. I couldn’t imagine what life would be like after her physical loss from this world. She was the main reason why I am a classic film fan.

Looking back at my fifteen year old self, I could see why I felt that way, but in the years since, I can’t help but recognize how much she still influences me, and whose qualities I admired but never owned on myself, I now own and admire. Today marks the tenth anniversary of her death, and while I have paid tribute to her in the past in countless ways, I feel she deserves another. It’s funny, when I first came here, my first tribute article was on her, and now, based on the growth as a writer, actor, and playwright, how much I’ve grown. From the seed she planted, a flower has grown, and from the looks of it, it was her favorite, a Queen Anne’s lace. But, I digress. 

In 1932, fresh off her Broadway success as Antiope in The Warrior’s Husband, she made her first picture. 

As Sydney Fairfield in A Bill of Divorcement, her film debut was a rare performance even in that time period. With John Barrymore, Billie Burke, David Manners, Henry Stephenson, and Elizabeth Patterson, and even though she was technically a supporting role, she managed to walk away a leading actress- daring to show an progressive intelligence of a woman who finds the humanity of her mentally-ill father returned from the hospital. She transitioned into film so easily, it was amazing that she was able to call it a debut and the film does not get much air play even today. She just gets her character. 

The following year was a busy year for her, but she was able to create a performance that not only changed her career, but earned her the respect of her peers- that of Eva Lovelace in Morning Glory.

With Douglas Fairbanks, Jr., Adolphe Menjou, and C. Aubrey Smith, we see her get her character as soon as she appears on screen. It is not that Hepburn has a technique that has been established by philosophy and theatre academia, but it is not that Hepburn thrived on personality either. It is so hard to describe how she approaches a character because all anyone can see if they pay close enough attention is that she is simply the character she is playing, and she is not herself playing it. The character of Eva Lovelace is a passionate ingenue, who, through trial and hardship, still endures with achieving her goal of being an actress. Being a film before the Production Code aside, we can see that the trials of being in shows that open and close too soon and the hardship she endures from being between jobs that she can’t eat nor sustain herself otherwise do wear on her, but Hepburn knows her character well enough to make those wears only noticeable through subtlety. Through her own theatrical experience, she is able to channel the energy of a stage performance into the subtlety of character. But, that is only wood for kindling- it is not the fire that burns from a performance. It is no wonder she won Best Actress for her performance in Morning Glory, because she was able to flesh out a reality of the stage actor, and capture its nuances to the medium of which a story can be told. A well deserved Oscar. 

It would be thiry four years before she would appear in a film that would garner recognition, but her film and stage work between time was not without the merit of recognition, as she was the most nominated actress of her time. And, it is not that Hepburn didn’t bring out the best for the characters she portrayed either, but how can you calm a fire that can’t be truly dosed? 

In 1967, after a four year hiatus in which she cared for her love, Spencer Tracy, she returned in a film that would be true to her artistry and well as be one of the best performances an actor on screen could make.

As Christina Drayton in Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner, she is able to freely show where a character could now go, now that the Production Code was abolished, and managed to communicate to an important issue as well. With Spencer Tracy, Sidney Poitier, Katharine Houghton, Roy Glenn, Beah Richards, Isobel Sanford, Barbara Randolph,  Vriginia Christine, and Cecil Kellaway, her character encounters a previously unaddressed subject in mainstream film- that of racism and race in America in an intimate, personable context. Now, people chalk up this film has hokey, and her performance in this film not worthy of any recognition. Hepburn herself said that any recognition was for her and Tracy, and not her. While one can admire to her commitment to the love of her life, as she did sacrifice herself out of love for him, one mustn’t underestimate the power of her performance in this film. Her character, which she immediately gets, is a progressive woman who, when her daughter says she is going to marry a man, and she finds out he’s African-American, the look on her face is not much of shock as it is an awareness of a different situation that she is prepared for, and an awareness of the social conundrum society will look at and judge. Her character sees love in times of social and political change, and therefore, out of love she sees, has to catch everyone around her up on where she is at so everyone can move forward. It is Hepburn’s Christina who gets Tracy’s Matt to engage Poitier’s John. It is Hepburn’s Christina who scoffs off the inappropriate pry and judgment of her employee who enters rudely. It is Hepburn’s Christina who works hard to help Tracy’s Matt reach an interesting conclusion about the matter. Hepburn understands that it is love that drives her character to be the active agent in the drama, but it is not a simple, stereotypical way of love, but a pragmatic and forward way. She is able to understand the complexity of which siding for love has for her own character’s relationship with her character’s husband- and how she holds down the fort while opening it up is as amazing as being an active player in a drama touching on an issue relevant and real, even to this day. It is no doubt that she deserved the Best Actress Oscar for her performance in this film, because her performance is what helps make the film the film. 

The following year, she appeared in another film that made her artistry completely free range, this time as Eleanor of Aquitaine in The Lion In Winter.

With Peter O'Toole, Anthony Hopkins, John Castle, Nigel Terry, Timothy Dalton, Jane Merrow, and Nigel Stock, we are able to see Hepburn’s artistry in the raw.  Hepburn played royalty before, but here, she exposes the full depth of which a woman imprisoned and demonized goes through, let alone having social and political power in an age where women were not granted even that. She does not play herself, but that of a woman scored by betrayal, infidelity, and political trickery. Clearly, her character is no saint, but Hepburn exposes her character’s pain, builds the fire more with her passion, and leaves us wanting more with her attempts at achieving her character’s goal. We see the passion. We see the drive. We see the commitment. We are able to be on her side, as she is tested to the maximum of her will. It is one of her best performances, and it is hard to distinguish it among others. She deserved her Best Actress Oscar for her performance in this film, as the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences could not distinguish it on its own tying it with Barbra Streisand’s performance in Funny Girl. At the time, there was only one precedent set, but none of whose recognition was in a leading category. 

Katharine Hepburn maintained her career, always challenging herself to go beyond a point of comfort and to try new things. At a time when it is suggested actresses put up the desire and accept retirement, she persisted with a second wind unmatched by even today’s standards. She won her second and third Oscars after the age of 60. While we are thinking that today’s actresses are amazing to achieve that feat, Hepburn broke the rule, as well as her peers with her. Clearly, age wasn’t going to stop her from continuing a stage career even after film success, and venturing into television and exploring that medium. Not to mention, argue for causes she felt she could contribute to, and not being afraid to say what was on her mind. 

In 1981, she appeared in a film that took a major risk in and of itself, as Ethel Thayer in On Golden Pond.

With Henry Fonda, Jane Fonda, Dabney Coleman, and Doug McKeon, the risk she was taking was appearing in a film in which senior citizens were not just the funny supporting, but full fleshed characters with lives, ambitions, skills, and active romance. Still, Hepburn got her character like a shoe gets a foot. People chalk this up as a personality performance, and chalk up recognition to still being in the industry at her age, but again, they underestimate her performance entirely. Her character cares for her husband, who is obsessed with his own mortality and suffers from heart palpatations, and cares for her daughter, who has a strained relationship with her father. But, she is more than a nurturer. She meets hardship head on, and Hepburn this time, exposes her character’s struggles through subtlety and open emotion. She gets that her character is her character’s husband’s life force, and in an age when film acting was glorifying the Method, she was able to make this character real through simple commitment. She teaches a lesson in acting without even teaching it. In doing so, she won a Best Actress Oscar for her performance in this film, beating out Diane Keaton, Marsha Mason, Susan Sarandon, and Meryl Streep. She deserved the recognition without question. 

Though she remained active, health did become a contributing factor for a decline in work, but the persistence and commitment remained intact. In 1994, she made her last feature film- as Ginny in Love Affair.

With Warren Beatty, Annette Bening, Pierce Brosnan, Kate Capshaw, and Brenda Vaccaro, and at the age of 87, Hepburn leaves an indelible impression on a film that lacked it. Though a supporting player, Hepburn saves the film by maintaining her commitment to character and dignifying a film through her brief twelve minutes. After sixty-two years in film, Hepburn retired from acting not too long after this film was released.

Katharine Hepburn’s mark on film is unique and individual. Her commitment to her craft is exemplary, and while imitation is flattery, you can’t imitate what can’t be imitated. Ten years ago, she left us, and she is greatly missed for it. Personally, I am glad I can pop in a film of hers, read a fact about her, getting more of a scope of who she was- but I am equally glad that I can live from her example in valuing craft above recognition, to be determined and persistent and not let anything stop me, to stand up and fight for equality, and to listen to the song of life. Somewhere, I hope that Hepburn knows that the world is better place because of her impact.


the security guard thought i was 15?? he looked at my id like six times and he still thought i was fifteen fuckin years old. Besides my id clearly stating im 21 i also in no way look 15+i have tattoos all over+i told him i work as a bartender? but i just went with it tbh he was like “why dont u go to school” and i was like “well, you know… ADHD:)” and he was like “yes ofc:)”

@__@ I don’t know why the video is going that fast but the audio is normal and i don’t know how to fix it…sorry!! The first time I recorded, it was too long, so I had to do it again @.@ I can’t do the book passage tonight, but I’ll try to remember to do it tomorrow!! I’m just really exhausted and I got in trouble cause I’m still up haha, though its only like 9:30. I apologize for the weird lighting and how oily my skin looks and how bleh I look in general and my awful voice, haha. I look and sound like a 12 year old, but I promise I’m fifteen!
Anywho, thanks a billion for the questions, sorry this was boring, and goodnight!

anonymous asked:

when you guys started out, how hard was it?

Really fucking hard.” Vienna sighed, reminiscing with amusement on the days the band started. “I was sixteen, not even out of high school yet. I dropped out with Casey. We were – and still are – inseparable.”

“I remember when I was a spotty-faced fuckin’ sixteen year old, and my relationship with this boy I started dating at fourteen… maybe fifteen… was going sour. I pulled Casey over and said, 

‘Hey, Case. You know how you said you always wanted to make a famous band?’ 

And he was all like, 

Yeah Vi?’ 

And of course, Casey had always been crushin’ on me, so I told him I wanted to make a band he was all, ‘Of course Vi! Yes! I’d love to!’ It was really cute. So we looked around for a bassist and lead guitarist, since I said I’d sing, and Case wanted to drum, and we found Andy and Bill, who were a few years older than us. I heard Andy sing and I was like ‘He has to sing.’ Because wow. he was amazing. We both auditioned and got the parts, forming Toxin.

Of course it was hard though. For the first few months we were sleeping out the backs of houses and shit because Casey and I dropped out, Andy was a runaway and Bill – Well… He got into drugs. We played wherever we could, and we all shared a bed. Sometimes we’d have intervals, so we’d take turns. Other times, we’d all just pile into the same bed. It wasn’t that bad really. Except the places we slept in were usually really fucking gross. I went through a few different ‘phases’ and ‘looks’ before I settled on one I liked too. Long hair to short hair to long hair to medium length to corsets to flannels. It was a mess. I eventually settled on the ‘91 Circa look because it made it easier to find clothes and shit, and I didn’t take as long to get ready. Lots of times we’d be getting kicked out or evicted ‘cos we couldn’t pay rent or a party got out of hand or something happened. 

We slept in pickup trucks and I had to fight off a lot of unwanted advances by guys who couldn’t fucking get the message, but luckily I’ve always been able to count on Andrew. God bless the fact he’s fucking six-foot-five. Really. It’s a life saver. That band was and still is my everything… Even if some things aren’t the same.” 

Reaction to How I Met My Husband

I love Alice Munro’s great work How I Met My Husband. The story’s tenderness towards all of its characters touched me, its gentle tone paired with humor entertained me, its spectacular ending surprised and delighted me, and I like how the author put a twist by the complications set up at the last part of the story.

Like Munro’s other stories, this story has a tone of charming intimacy and confidentiality, expressed through the double perspective of its first person narrator.

In the story, Edie looks back from her younger years. She tells her story back when she was still a fifteen-year-old romantic girl, as the middle-aged Mrs. Carmichael who now understands everything what her younger self did not and could not. She starts the story by narrating the time when she met the man that she soon fell in love with, Chris Watters. After some time, a woman named Alice Kelling arrived in town and introduced herself as Chris’ fiancée. Since, it would be inconvenient for her to go back and stay at a hotel, the Peebles offered her lodging. The next day, the Peebles along with Alice went out for a picnic and Edie visited Chris where they had a romantic encounter. He told her that he would be leaving soon and promised her letters in the future. By the time Mrs. Peebles and the other women were having dinner, they started conversing which brought up Chris leaving the town into the conversation. The conversation got heated up when Edie told everybody that she had been intimate with him. The story ended with Edie meeting her husband, the mailman she had always seen while waiting for Chris’ promised letters. She closed her story with this wonderful, enigmatic message regarding her husband and herself: “He always tells the children the story of how I went after him by sitting at the mailbox every day, and naturally I laugh and let him, because I like for people to think what pleases them and makes them happy.”

Munro is very consistent about the story’s plot until the end. The story’s plot consists of Edie continually narrating her life as a hired girl, and telling the important details that lead up to meeting her husband. The chronological order used by the author makes the story easy to follow and imagine vividly what occurred. It’s until the last paragraph of the entire short story, where we find out that she actually ends up marrying the mailman.

At first, I was expecting that Edie would marry Chris since the story was focused on both of them. The author focused so much on how Edie met Chris and their random conversations so I thought the story would be about him. It wasn’t until the last paragraph that I found out about Carmichael, Edie’s husband. The diverting plot structure matches the flow of the story because the narrator tells backstories to get to her main purpose: how she met her husband, the mailman. The ending threw me for a loop but it just goes with the overall theme of the story. The minor characters like Loretta Bird and Mrs. Peebles also help advance the plot because their accusations get the truth out of Edie.

The way how Munro arranged the story’s elements is effective because it helps to explain just what the title says, how she met her husband.  Edie, falling in love with the pilot was what led her to her husband. Perhaps, it is Munro’s remarkable gift of making her stories that attracts the readers to her work.

Word count: 594

Watching casualty with mum and dad and there’s a fifteen year old girl who’s cut her arm really deep and had to go to A&E…it’s like I can feel what my parents are thinking…this is not going to be a fun episode to watch…I just hope mum doesn’t ask to see my arms tonight because my most recent scars still look really red and raised and fresh… 😣😔

My friend Joseph is so weird

ONE TIME I end up wearing pantyhose that have a run in them that spreads during the afternoon.  And he want to knows “How long does a pair of nylons typically last” and I’m like “I don’t know!!  They all look the same so I can’t tell if it’s the pair I wore once or three times.


A girl did an interpretative speech using the same piece of literature I’d done a few years earlier.  Unsolicited, while we’re waiting to see her speech, Joseph says “Nina’s cuter than you.  You’re still cute though.”  And I’m like “Turn around and watch the speech.”