I'm-trying-so-hard

I’m currently at 784$ and that went to rent and my survival goal is 3,000$ for at LEAST a month (for rent 500$) mediacal bills (around 2k) prescriptions (my shots alone are almost 1k themselves and I’m on five other meds that keep me ALIVE ) and that’s not even including electric bill or anything or necessities or food…

I have proof about my shots and people who can vouch for me that I’m not making up these prices out of my ass. I NEED HELP! This is urgent !! 3k isn’t even enough but I’m trying so hard, I have NO resources

Option one: work harder than your body can physically handle, pain 24/7, finally make almost enough money to cover expenses, have zero free time to do anything and no energy to do it if you did. waking up at 3 am to get to work. what are friends. what is life. work work work

Option two: try to find another way to make money. pain 24/7, struggling to get by. loads of free time, limited energy but that’s nothing new. you get to sleep in, you’re on your own schedule. can’t go out to see friends, you hate being the broke one. Life sucks but there’s gotta be something out there.
#CanITakeAThirdOption  #LivingWithADisability

Update

Guys, I know I haven’t been around a lot these couple of days but life is absolutely crazy and finals are killing me. I don’t have a lot of free time and when I do I have to do so many things, like read and reblog and reply to all of you -if I haven’t replied to an ask or a message, I’m not ignoring you, I just need a little time- and writing because I’m participating in 8 challenges (Jesus Christ, I know), and, well, rest a bit. I’m hoping that I’ll be able to catch up with all the reading this weekend. Just bear with me, please.

Thank you and I love you all!

Originally posted by theyremenofletters

I think once I’m done helping my dad pack the house up and I’m no longer busy I’m going to look into getting a therapist. Or like, something. I’m not really able to keep my anxiety and depression in check on my own very well anymore.

I just want to be better.

// I want to just crawl under a rock and die. Chemistry exam was a disaster, with a class average of 62%, and my own as a 47%, which was even worse than my first exam. I’m trying so hard. I’m doing everything the teacher says to do. I do the homework, the practice problems, the review problems, I got to a tutor everyday, I outline every chapter, and it doesn’t do shit. Why do I have to be such a fucking failure.

2

Ordered another cute floral dress for Devon this summer. <3 

I’ve decided I want to be okay with the way I look. I’m still trying to eat healthy and exercise and drink a ton of water and treat my body in healthy ways, but I am trying my damnedest to love my body as it is anyways, even if I have put on weight. I’m not a thin college girl anymore and I need to accept it. I don’t have that kind of time anymore and hell, I’m older, my body isn’t going to look the way it did when I was 23, as much as I would KILL for it to. 

So here’s to self-love and finding clothes that make me feel pretty even if my cute, thin, super in shape, 23 year old college girl days are long over.