I'M MAKING A THING THIS IS HOW EXCITED I AM ABOUT THIS

Want to know me better? Send me any number!
  • 1: My name?
  • 2: Do I have any nicknames?
  • 3: Zodiac sign?
  • 4: Video game I play to chill, not to win?
  • 5: Book/series I reread?
  • 6: Aliens or ghosts?
  • 7: Writer I trust enough to read whatever they write?
  • 8: Favourite radio station?
  • 9: Favourite flavour of anything?
  • 10: The word that I use all the time to describe something great?
  • 11: Favourite song?
  • 12: The question you ask new friends to get to know them better?
  • 13: Favourite word?
  • 14: The last person who hurt me, did I forgive them?
  • 15: Last song I listened to?
  • 16: TV show I always recommend?
  • 17: Pirates or ninjas?
  • 18: Movie I watch when I'm feeling down?
  • 19: Song that I always start my shuffle with/wake-up song/always-on-a-loop song?
  • 20: Favourite video games?
  • 21: What am I most afraid of?
  • 22: A good quality of mine?
  • 23: A bad quality of mine?
  • 24: Cats or dogs?
  • 25: Actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they're in?
  • 26: Favourite season?
  • 27: Am I in a relationship?
  • 28: Something I miss?
  • 29: My best friend?
  • 30: Eye colour?
  • 31: Hair colour?
  • 32: Someone I love?
  • 33: Someone I trust?
  • 34: Someone I always think about?
  • 35: Am I excited about anything?
  • 36: My current obsession?
  • 37: Favourite TV shows as a child?
  • 38: Do I have someone of the opposite sex that I can tell everything to?
  • 39: Am I superstitious?
  • 40: What do I think about most?
  • 41: Do I have any strange phobias?
  • 42: Do I prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?
  • 43: Favourite hobbies?
  • 44: Last book I read?
  • 45: Last film I watched?
  • 46: Do I play any instruments?
  • 47: Favourite animal?
  • 48: Top 5 blog on Tumblr that I follow?
  • 49: Superpower I wish I could have?
  • 50: How do I destress?
  • 51: Do I like confrontation?
  • 52: When do I feel most at peace?
  • 53: What makes me smile?
  • 54: Do I sleep with the lights on or off?
  • 55: Play any sports?
  • 56: What is my song of the week?
  • 57: Favourite drink?
  • 58: When did I last send a handwritten letter to somebody?
  • 59: Afraid of heights?
  • 60: Pet peeve?
  • 61: What was the last concert I went to see?
  • 62: Am I vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian?
  • 63: What occupation did I want to do when I was younger?
  • 64: Have I ever had a friend turn enemy?
  • 65: What fictional universe would I like to be a part of?
  • 66: Something I worry about?
  • 67: Scared of the dark?
  • 68: Who are my best friends?
  • 69: What do I admire most about others?
  • 70: Can I sing?
  • 71: Something I wish I could do?
  • 72: If I won the lottery, what would I do?
  • 73: Have I ever skipped school?
  • 74: Favourite place on the planet?
  • 75: Where do I want to live?
  • 76: Do I have any pets?
  • 77: What is my current desktop picture?
  • 78: Early bird or night owl?
  • 79: Sunsets or sunrise?
  • 80: Can I drive?
  • 81: Story behind my last kiss?
  • 82: Earphones or headphones?
  • 83: Have I ever had braces?
  • 84: Story behind one of my scars?
  • 85: Favourite genre of music?
  • 86: Who is my hero?
  • 87: Favourite comic book character?
  • 88: What makes me really angry?
  • 89: Kindle or real book?
  • 90: Favourite sporty activity?
  • 91: What is one thing that isn’t tight in schools that should be?
  • 92: What was my favourite subject at school?
  • 93: Siblings?
  • 94: What was the last thing I bought?
  • 95: How tall am I?
  • 96: Can I cook?
  • 97: Can I bake?
  • 98: 3 things I love?
  • 99: 3 things I hate?
  • 100: Do I have more girl friends or boy friends?
  • 101: Who do I get on with better, girls or boys?
  • 102: Where was I born?
  • 103: Sexual orientation?
  • 104: Where do I currently live?
  • 105: Last person I texted?
  • 106: Last time I cried?
  • 107: Guilty pleasure?
  • 108: Favourite Youtuber?
  • 109: A photo of myself.
  • 110: Do I like selfies?
  • 111: Favourite game app?
  • 112: My relationship with my parents?
  • 113: Favourite accents?
  • 114: A place I have not been but wish to visit?
  • 115: Favourite number?
  • 116: Can I juggle?
  • 117: Am I religious?
  • 118: Do I like space?
  • 119: Do I like the deep ocean?
  • 120: Am I much of a daredevil?
  • 121: Am I allergic to anything?
  • 122: Can I curl my tongue?
  • 123: Can I wiggle my ears?
  • 124: Do I like clowns?
  • 125: The Beatles or Elvis?
  • 126: My current project?
  • 127: Am I a bad loser?
  • 128: Do I admit when I wrong?
  • 129: Forest or beach?
  • 130: Favourite piece of advice?
  • 131: Am I a good liar?
  • 132: Hogwarts house / Divergent faction / Hunger Games district?
  • 133: Do I talk to myself?
  • 134: Am I very social?
  • 135: Do I like gossip?
  • 136: Do I keep a journal/diary?
  • 137: Have I ever hopelessly failed a test?
  • 138: Do I believe in second chances?
  • 139: If I found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would I do?
  • 140: Do I believe people are capable of change?
  • 141: Have I ever been underweight?
  • 142: Am I ticklish?
  • 143: Have I ever been in a submarine?
  • 144: Have I ever been on a plane?
  • 145: In a film about my life, who would I cast as myself, friends and family?
  • 146: Have I ever been overweight?
  • 147: Do I have any piercings?
  • 148: Which fictional character do I wish was real?
  • 149: Do I have any tattoos?
  • 150: What is the best decision I have made in life so far?
  • 151: Do I believe in Karma?
  • 152: Do I wear glasses or contacts?
  • 153: What was my first car?
  • 154: Do I want children?
  • 155: Who is the most intelligent person I know?
  • 156: My most embarrassing memory?
  • 157: What makes me nostalgic?
  • 158: Have I ever pulled an all-nighter?
  • 159: Which do I value more in others, brains or beauty?
  • 160: What colour mostly dominates my wardrobe?
  • 161: Have I ever had a paranormal experience?
  • 162: What do I hate most about myself?
  • 163: What do I love most about myself?
  • 164: Do I like adventure?
  • 165: Do I believe in fate?
  • 166: Favourite animal?
  • 167: Have I ever been on radio?
  • 168: Have I ever been on TV?
  • 169: How old am I?
  • 170: One of my favourite quotes?
  • 171: Do I hold grudges?
  • 172: Do I trust easily?
  • 173: Have I learnt from my mistakes?
  • 174: Best gift I’ve ever received?
  • 175: Do I dream?
  • 176: Have I ever had a night terror?
  • 177: Do I remember my dreams, and what is one that comes to mind?
  • 178: An experience that has made me stronger?
  • 179: If I were immortal, what would I do?
  • 180: Do I like shopping?
  • 181: If I could get away with a crime, what would I choose to do?
  • 182: What does “family” mean to me?
  • 183: What is my spirit animal?
  • 184: How do I want to be remembered?
  • 185: If I could master one skill, what would I choose?
  • 186: What is my greatest failure?
  • 187: What is my greatest achievement?
  • 188: Love or money?
  • 189: Love or career?
  • 190: If I could time travel, where and when would I want to go?
  • 191: What makes me the happiest?
  • 192: What is “home” to me?
  • 193: What motivates me?
  • 194: If I could choose my last words, what would they be?
  • 195: Would I ever want to encounter aliens?
  • 196: A movie that scared me as a child?
  • 197: Something I hated as a child that I like now?
  • 198: Zombies or vampires?
  • 199: Live in the city or suburbs?
  • 200: Dragons or wizards?
  • 201: A nightmare that has stayed with me?
  • 202: How do I define love?
  • 203: Do I judge a book by its cover?
  • 204: Have I ever had my heart broken?
  • 205: Do I like my handwriting?
  • 206: Sweet or savoury?
  • 207: Worst job I’ve had?
  • 208: Do I collect anything?
  • 209: Item of clothing or jewellery you’ll never see me without?
  • 210: What is on my bucket list?
  • 211: How do I handle anger?
  • 212: Was I named after anyone?
  • 213: Do I use sarcasm a lot?
  • 214: What TV character am I most like?
  • 215: What is the weirdest talent I have?
  • 216: Favourite fictional character?

Your grandfather was a fisherman. Your father and aunts and uncles worked the waters and the docks in the coastal town you hail from. It’s not glamorous, and nobody in the family had made it into college before. You grew up in a tidy little house that always smelled a bit of fish with a huge extended family.

Nobody expected the scholarship letter when it arrived, praising your performance in the local high school swim team, and nobody had ever heard of the school. Your parents were thrilled, and so were most of the aunts and uncles. Your grandfather was suspicious, making vague noises that sounded like “tricks and bargains and that kind of business.” What he said out loud was: “Don’t ever leave the sea. It’ll break your heart, girl.”

You were excited and optimistic and exuberant, and you packed your competition suit and a bag of things from home and you went off to college, not listening.

————

Freshman year was odd. You knew you wouldn’t really fit in, given you were a scholarship kid from the back end of the east coast, but it was more than that. You were, of course, on the women’s swim team, but some of the other athletes were … you couldn’t put your finger on it. A couple of the girls seemed too tall, and they never quite got the green from the pool out of their hair. One of the boys was much stockier than the others, a bit like your dad, but he could swim as fast and powerfully as you. He wouldn’t ever speak to you. Some of them were hard to look at, and kept to themselves. Some of them were just ordinary, but they kind of steered clear of you too. It seemed the only thing holding the teams together were the coaches. There were practices, and competitions and your team always did amazingly, but never made it out of state.

Your classes were … classes. Like high school but more interesting. Your managed to keep a decent GPA to hold onto that scholarship, but some of it was a chore. Sandy the RA gave you a list of rules and warned you about some of the other students. There was some superstition about, but given your heritage, none of that seemed off. Fishermen are superstitious folks.

Your roommate was snooty and complained constantly that you still smelled of fish, especially after winter break. You finally told her to go suck a clam and she stopped speaking to you. That was fine with you. You weren’t much for socializing with people who didn’t know the ocean.

That one guy, though, the one who asked you out after the first week of Comp 102 in January. That one, he was great. He was some kind of surfer kid from California. Not a college athlete, but Surfer Boy skated everywhere, talked constantly about the beaches and waves. Somehow tan even in winter.

The third week you were dating, he got you that steel ring for “safety” and you thought it was sweet. It said “always yours” on the inside and got stuck on your finger.

And then - your swimming performance dropped off. They threatened to bench you. There was an uncomfortable conference with the coach and the dean. The rest of the team avoided you even more, and Surfer Boy got … weird. Possessive. Mean.

He thought it was fine that you weren’t competing for a while. He could have you all to himself outside of class time. Isn’t that great? Maybe you could come to California with him for Spring Break. You didn’t want to, though. You wanted to go back to the cold water of home.

Then, about a week after you got benched, out of the blue while you were studying together, he asked you where your skin was. You had no idea what he meant, WTF was this serial killer shit he was asking you? You suddenly remembered Sandy’s warnings, and took off without your books to ask her for help, maybe how to get a restraining order? And maybe to help get this ring off, too.

Sandy the RA (short for Cassandra? Because nobody ever listened to her, not because it was her name) halfway listened to you, nodded tiredly, grabbed a form from a file for submitting to the dean of students and campus security and had you fill it out. Then, as you were both reading the forms over for errors, she looked up sharply, said, “Wait. A ring? Let me see that.”

Sandy took one look at it, got out a saw, and before you could even react, cut it off your finger, in two pieces. One piece said “always” the other said “yours” and she shook her head. “I thought I told you to never accept gifts?”

“But he’s just human, Sandy. Normal, even. More normal than I am.”

“Yeah, nobody ever listens to me.”

Under where the ring had sat for two of the worst weeks of your life, was fur. Sleek, short, dark fur. You yelped.

Sandy blinked slowly, somehow looking completely unsurprised, and said, “That stocky guy on the men’s swim team? The one they call Lion? GO. Talk to him. Show him your hand, he’ll talk to you now. I think he can help.”

As you left, she said, with her back turned, “I don’t think your grandfather was completely honest with you. Have you ever seen any photos of your grandmother? Do you know where she was from?”

(X)

more texts for you bitches

ANGSTY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] You should have told me you wanted me out of your life.
[text] I should have never let you back into my life.
[text] Okay [muse’s name] what’s the deal, pretty sure this is you…listen if you want me to leave you alone, please just tell that.
[text] Please don’t walk away.
[text] Please don’t do this.
[text] When are you going to realize I want nothing to do with you?
[text] You want nothing to do with me, I get it.
[text] I’m an idiot. You fooled me again.
[text] When I think things are about to change … I’m always proven wrong.
[text] I just want you to be happy. And you’ll be happier without me.
[text] I just hate that someone could make me trust [him/her/them] the way that I did
[text] The truth is I’m not over you.
[text] The truth is I never really wanted to be with you.
[text] I’m seeing someone else.
[text] How the hell did you get my number, stalker?
[text] You’re so selfish.
[text] I just saw you leave with [her/him/them].
[text] FUCK YOU AND YOUR DUMB CUTE FACE

LOVING TEXTS, BITCH

[text] Did I tell you today that you’re the most adorable? Cause, yeah.
[text] Be careful.
[text] I’m only saying it because I love you.
[text] I’m only saying it because I care about you.
[text] Okay, I’m bringing coffee.
[text] I’m thinking dinner and a movie later this week?
[text] Let me take you out, please?
[text] Let me make you dinner tonight.
[text] I want you to be happy.
[text] You’re always safe with me.
[text] I can’t stop thinking about you.
[text] I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you.
[text] I know you may not feel like you are, but you are loved. And important. Please don’t forget that.
[text] It was so good seeing you.
[text] You don’t need this shit.
[text] I’ll be there in five minutes.
[text] Let me help, please?
[text] You’re important to me.
[text] Stop falling asleep in the bathtub. You’re going to drown and die and leave me and I’m not having that.
[text] I would gladly watch Netflix and eat Thai with you any day.
[text] I’d give up my phone charger AND the last piece of gum for you. That’s love.
[text] Hey beautiful no judgment but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??

ANGRY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] If you don’t want me to bust your window, I suggest you answer the phone. Now.
[text] To quote Mean Girls, you’re a fugly slut.
[text] Are you SERIOUSLY bringing that up right now!?
[text] Lose my number, asshole.
[text] You’re so predictable and obnoxious. And it’s not only me who thinks so.
[text] …The least you could do is answer, wtf.
[text] You’re a piece of shit human being and an even worse friend.
[text] This is YOUR FAULT. And you can’t even pretend like it isn’t, because you know it is.
[text] Why couldn’t you just stay out of it?
[text] Holy fucking shit, take a hint, asshole.
[text] Go fuck yourself.
[text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you?
[text] You can take your stuff back as long as I don’t light it on fire first.
[text] I have cramps and a migraine so you do NOT want to mess with me right now
[text] Bye and have a very fuck you day

SEXY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
[text] Why are you so hot…like honestly, it’s not fair.
[text] Yeah, you looked good in your [dress/shirt/pants] last night but really, they looked way better on my floor.
[text] Come over. With condoms.
[text] You should come over, clothing optional.
[text] I feel like a nasty slut and I LOVE IT
[text] Sorry I got drunk and texted you about my sex life
[text] Sex on a rooftop - trashy or adventurous?
[text] If you’re not at my apartment, shirtless, in five minutes, I will be personally offended.
[text] I don’t think he likes that I’m always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
[text] It’ll be like The Notebook, except with way more of my penis.
[text] I didn’t know that all of his brothers would be hot and musically inclined, too. That’s a dick move on behalf of biology.
[text] I DON’T WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
[text] So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
[text] I just need some of your time and all of your body.
[text] I am available for nakedness
[text] I think about [him/her/them] when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love

DRUNK TEXTS, BITCH

[drunk text] So wat are you really over me no w
[drunk text] AND I UNFOLLOWED YOU ON INSTAGRAM TOO, BITCH
[drunk text] You are my queen and my savior and I love you forever
[drunk text] You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known
[drunk text] I’m eating macaroni and cheese on a slice of pizza and autocorrect just wrote that text for me pretty much, what’s your night like
[drunk text] Listen up slut, you’re one hot piece of ass and if [he/she/they] doesn’t realize it, it’s their loss
[drunk text] but what’s the point of a Disney sing off party if you’re not here. You have to be be the Pumbaa to my Timon
[drunk text] Can you pls remind me tomorrow of how much of a fool I made myself tonight
[drunk text] FUCK YOU YOU’RE GORGEOUS
[drunk text] I think maybe you and me should like go out and eat pizza or something check yes or no
[drunk text] Please don’t hate me I’m too tired and too dizzy to be hated
[drunk text] I hate (him/her) but less when I’m drinking. Thanks, alcohol.
[drunk text] Omf g you need to get over here now I think I’m dyin
[drunk text] SWEEEEEEEET CAROLINE

scarletnightwalker  asked:

Hello, I was wondering if you could help me. Lately I've come across the healthy/unhealthy personality types. Though I know, that I'm an ENTP, I would like to learn, how you can tell whether they are healthy or not. Would be great if you would explain this. Thanks in advance PS.: I'm not sure, if this is the right place to ask my questions, so correct me if the 'question' section isn't the right one.

It’s the right place. All the mods are pretty chill coz we’re awesome. :)

Unhealthy NTP: never finishes anything or focuses on the details (zero follow through), uses their Fe to manipulate people (you’re soft, and a pansy, and making you fall for my BS is so fun, maybe I can even get you to cry by pointing out how stupid your ideas are!) or intentionally hurt them rather than forge genuine connections or take into consideration people’s feelings.

Healthy NTP: knows which ideas are better than others, in order to focus on bringing them into fruition and either commits to them long-term by selecting a creative partner (Ne/Fe) or giving their ideas away to others who can nail down the details. Is logical but gentle in correcting others, mindful that people’s feelings matter and it’s important for others to genuinely like you in life, in order to get things done (and because it’s the nice thing to do). Realizes they’re prone to hyperbole, short term interests, and exaggeration, and learns to laugh about it, but also acknowledge it and work on fixing it. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy NFP: never finishes anything or focuses on details (zero follow through), follows their heart without regard for the consequences, using that to justify hurtful behavior (I don’t care what you think, I fell out of love with you, so I can cheat on you all I want, I’ve done nothing wrong, this is who I am, just deal with it or get out), refuses to take blame for their part of the problem, may intentionally offend others, and doesn’t care about anyone but themselves.

Healthy NFP: knows which ideas are better than others and seeks to bring the best ones into the world through healthy engagement of goals, deadlines, and process of elimination (Te). Sets personal deadlines for self, and beats them, in order to stay motivated. Understands what drives them most, slows them down, or angers them, and commits to doing something about it. Learns such things as “tact,” when dealing with others, but also when and where to defy social norms and stand up for oneself (does that really matter? is it worth a fight?). Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy NTJ: becomes obnoxious in pushing their “vision” on others or asserting they know everything (including your motives) while devaluing your feelings or beliefs, often sneers at people who make emotional decisions, and sometimes passive-aggressively attacks people’s ego or intelligence that they do not like (okay, stupid, I’m just going to make you look like an idiot, while correcting every damn thing you say, all day long, until you run away and cry).

Healthy NTJ: has a fair, balanced, and open-minded approach to life, is willing to listen to others’ ideas and offer practical thoughts on them, but is neither arrogant nor pushy about their knowledge, expertise, and logical detachment. Chooses when to correct others with care, and never does so to humiliate, only to educate. Respects others’ feelings even if they personally feel that the other person is making a mistake. Focuses on taking their ideas and goals and making them real. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy NFJ: total detachment from reality, while stubbornly clinging to the belief that their irrational interpretation is “the truth” (and the ONLY truth) (It DOES make sense, you’re just too stupid to understand it!), and resorting to a “you’re either with us or against us” mentality, which manifests in creating a single universal (sometimes abstract) enemy and trying to recruit others to join their cause against them / you (bad Ni and Fe).

Healthy NFJ: has a fair, balanced, and open-minded approach to life, accepts their interpretation may be unrealistic, but is committed to bringing their ideas and visualizations to life, often by recruiting others to a positive common cause. Uses their understanding of others’ motives to uplift rather than tear down, and becomes a source of compassionate and guiding “wisdom” for friends (I worry about you choosing this path, and here’s why…). Never recruits others in any negative ways against someone who disagrees with them. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy STP: irresponsible, reckless, and hedonistic, engaging in short-term behaviors that leave a wake of destruction behind (broken marriages, families, and violated responsibilities), often using Fe to manipulate people to get what they want (hey, I’m super hot and I’ve seen you ogling my backside, so I’m going to wear something that accentuates it so you’ll give me what I want in return one of these days; I don’t care how wrong it is) and then dumping them like hotcakes.

Healthy STP: knows life has much to offer and not only enjoys it but helps others loosen up and try new things, but commits to the people, beliefs, and jobs that are most important to them, for the long term. Understands and respects others’ feelings and seeks to connect to them through that, as well as develop their own ability to communicate. Learns the art of tact and when to use it (is it worth correcting this person or does it matter?). Tries to think about the long-term consequences of impulse, before engaging in it. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy SFP: irresponsible, reckless, and hedonistic, going through jobs and romantic relationships like wildfire, abandoning people every time they get “bored” or feel unattached; justifies this behavior with selfish reasoning (I just don’t love you anymore, so I don’t have to treat you with respect); unable to be counted upon by other people, since they never show up or follow through; refuses to take responsibility through their actions and doesn’t mind offending others for no reason at all.

Healthy SFP: is good at self-entertaining and eager to try new things, and infects others with a similar excitement; is good at pushing people out of their comfort zones and encouraging them to aim high for their dreams. Has a strong sense of personal beliefs, and is willing to commit to other people, and prioritize them in relationships. Knows when it’s appropriate to defy social convention, and when it’s better to dial back the “but this is just who I am!” and chill. Sets personal goals, deadlines, and achievements, and sticks with things, so they have something tangible to show for their time (Te). Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy STJ: refuses to adapt or change even when their world implodes; may try and “force” or “strong-arm” others into their point of view. Has little interest or respect for people’s feelings and doesn’t mind crushing them on their way to success, but may also play the role of a martyr in the process (since NO ONE ELSE IS RESPONSIBLE AROUND HERE, I HAVE TO DO IT). May become irrational or paranoid with lower Ne, and turn into a pessimist.

Healthy STJ: uses their extensive past experience to figure out what will and won’t work when dealing with life and problems, but is also open to new ideas, trying out new things, and experiencing what “lies beneath the surface” (Ne). Tries not to shut down ideas until they have considered them. Is practical, efficient, and logical, but also respects people’s feelings and doesn’t intentionally try to hurt, shame, or control them. Becomes able to share what they need emotionally with others, rather than playing a martyr (I would like it if you would take the trash out; since I’m doing this other thing, it seems fair, and it would make me happy). Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy SFJ: refuses to change or adapt, while clinging stubbornly to their idea of “how things were,” while struggling to control their emotions; may resort to being “fake” in order to manipulate others, to “us vs them” thinking and overt moralizing (if you don’t agree with us, you’d better change your mind or face the consequences, because we can’t let you hold such a wrong point of view and will punish you for it).

Healthy SFJ: uses the past to form impressions about people and situations, but changes those perceptions based on new experience; is open to new ideas and beliefs, and willing to look beneath the surface (Ne), with the aim of making those things “useful and tangible” in the real world (how can this idea apply to life and improve our situation?). Learns the art of “polite affirming correction,” which helps others become better, while not shaming, humiliating, or insulting them for their behavior. Aware not everyone needs to agree, and comfortable with those who don’t; never recruits anyone against anyone else, or adopts a mentality of “let’s get that person, together.” Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes. 

- ENFP Mod

anonymous asked:

hello gin!!! your newest update for 'price of a soul' is amazing! can i ask you to talk about all this symbolism in the comic (and also why do you love to hurt us so much with it)

THIS QUESTION MAKES ME SO HAPPY  I’M SCREAMING THANK YOU FOR YOUR INTEREST ANON (actually thank you everyone for your kind asks about TPOAS… THEY ARE THE FIRE IN MY VEINS THANK YOU)

I think the most important thing I wanted to work on this comic is how it is told from Tamashi’s eyes. That’s how I decided to build the characters through the story, for example, what Tamashi sees most is Allen’s face, honest, straightforward, kind, sweet, smiling, always open and welcoming: 

Whereas he doesn’t see Kanda’s face, Kanda is always turned to him. And when he does, it’s from an low angle:

I had fun thinking it would be important that we, as Tamashi, know of Kanda what he does: Kanda is the father he doesn’t know anything of. Intimidating, scary, tall, unreachable, always with his back turned on him. (With his back turned to him, but I guess you wouldn’t offer your back to an enemy). I aim to, gradually, expose Kanda’s features as Tamashi grows confident, making him look more human and less of a jerk than what he does now (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧

Also have you noticed how everyone bends forward to talk to Tamashi? Or squats down to be at his level? So Tamashi can stare directly at them. It’s a very simple gesture but it’s one that says I’m reducing my world to your perspective because you are as important, which Kanda never does.

The first time I read DGM i had to go through the Alma arc three times to made sure I fully understood Kanda (I keep thinking there are hints of his personality I keep missing, as I do with Allen… DGM is such an amazing artwork) so when I thought of him for this story I wanted to be very careful building the conceptualism around a character that has never forgiven himself and doesn’t want redemption. Can you imagine, you spend your life trying to fulfill a promise of love and then you find out -because you slipped once, only once, you are as human as the rest even if it might not seem so-, that you have a kid you never intended on having, even less with someone you’ll never love maybe not even remember, who kinda looks like Alma when they were kids, who is called Tamashi, who, surprise, is there to bite him in his ass. Tamashi is the perspective of a future Kanda never allowed himself to have and now he’s forced to deal with it (ノ≧∀≦)ノ Good thing Allen is here to be the bridge between present Kanda and past Kanda, Allen you angel  (//▽//)ゞ So, basically, what we see of Kanda is an unforgiving Kanda, intimidating, pretending to not mind when he so clearly does (in the last update with Tamashi sleeping outside of Kanda’s room he spends there looking at the boy how long? Five minutes? Ten? He didn’t awoke Tamashi either, just lets him be. He’s trying to make his way out of this without a fuss but OH YOU WON’T BE SO LUCKY KANDA The denial Is Strong). 

Oh! Also I was very careful with colors and including some… … … … little details (୨୧ ❛ᴗ❛)✧ 

Both panels with the flowers are very important…! they are different types of flowers in different palettes… Allen’s one are somewhat fresh and rainy, so springy, whereas Kanda’s seem to be floating on an abandoned place… Pretty, but isolated (•̀௰•́ ) This is funny because oH WELL SPOILER I GUESS / CRASHES THROUGH THE WINDOW AND FLIES INTO THE SUN

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK REALLY!! 

#LastYoungRenegade - out July 2nd, 2017

Who is the Last Young Renegade?

After all this time writing music, playing in a band- checking moment after moment off the bucket list- collecting mistakes, making memories, I wondered what it might be like to write about myself if I wasn’t the one standing in my shoes. Who am I from the other side of the mirror?

I tried to change perspective in my approach to writing and center in on all of the different versions of me that other people might have met over the years, through the ups and the downs, in the public eye and behind closed doors. Would I like this person? Do I like this person? Do I even recognize this person anymore?

I realized that there’s a lot more to me than I’m usually ready to acknowledge, both good and bad. In that realization, I noticed a common thread. We are who we are, even when we try our hardest not to be.

It’s a challenge to accept it sometimes. I gave those other sides of me a persona, and a name– then came the stories like a flood. It was a way for me to confront demons without having to sit at the dinner table with them.

That’s the journey on this record: a story of self-realization. Of growing into your own skin through the eyes of someone watching it all unfold on the big screen, wearing a ‘Frankie Says Relax’ t-shirt. Like watching an old familiar movie, but suddenly you’re Marty McFly.

We tried a lot of new things on this album, all within the context of what we love so much about All Time Low– There’s no denying that we were binge watching Stranger Things at the time, while also reflecting on the loss of some of our favorite musicians; Prince, Bowie, George Michael… I think the influence comes through in the best ways. We all felt pulled to exciting and different places as we searched for inspiration, approaching something that’s become so familiar to us from a new direction.

I truly hope everyone listening enjoys this record as much as I do. It’s been an amazing journey.The album comes out June 2nd and will be available for pre-order on Friday, Feb 24th. We’ll also be posting some pre-order merch bundles, so stay tuned! Pre-order options will be up on alltimelow.com.

Tracklist
1.
Last Young Renegade
2. Drugs & Candy
3. Dirty Laundry
4. Good Times
5. Nice2KnoU
6. Life of the Party
7. Nightmares
8. Dark Side of Your Room
9. Ground Control (feat. Tegan and Sara)
10. AfterglowxoAlex

anonymous asked:

(1/2) i love lance more than anything but i'm also in love with the percy jackson series and recently i was thinking; unclaimed!lance, stuffed into the hermes cabin, and all alone even with everyone around him. because his friends are out there, having a jolly good time being claimed (Hunk is Hephaestus, Pidge is Demeter, Keith is Ares, Shiro is Ares.) and he's stuffed with Hermes. And he's so sad over it, yknow? because he doesnt know what he is, who he is, and he feels so left out

(2/2) because he sticks out like a sore thumb in the hermes cabin, he’s not all cunning and thieving like they naturally are (hermes is the god of thieves) and it kind of just kills him bc he’s always had a big & close family and all of a sudden he was torn away from them and hauled into this camp and then he finds out he doesnt even know whose kid he is?! (i like to imagine him being claimed as a son of poseidon and finally, finally feeling at peace bc he knows who he is now)

I am weak for Percy Jackson, how did you know Okay so, lets say this is in canon verse for the Percy Jackson series- they had the war and they won and shit- and imagine, Lance, who doesn’t know who he is, who is kinda good at sword fighting but much better at long range archery, who gets a long very well with Will Solace and the Apollo cabin, move into a cabin that is almost always empty. 

Yeah, he’s excited to be Percy Jackson’s sibling and all, but holy fuck, is it lonely in the cabin. Percy is at collage now, and Tyson is in Rome with Ella, and the cabin is so lonely and silent and it honestly bothers him. That is until Percy and Tyson find out they have a younger sibling. (In canon, Percy is like 18-19, and in this AU pretty boy, Lance, is like 16, and Tyson is a cyclops their age scales work differently.) And they’re like rushing to camp to meet them. All of the seven do. And of course he hung out with Nico, cause you know, friends with Will Solace, so hes already cool with him, but now he’s friends with all the demigods that are like… cool as shit and strong as shit. And he hangs out with Jason Grace- little known fact about Lance, he has a crush on one Jason Grace, much to Keith’s annoyance. 

So he starts hanging out with the seven plus everyone else, and his friends are like, “What” because now Lance is really cool, and being recognized for being really cool, and he has all these new friends, and Hunk doesn’t want to be replaced. Cue a big emotional scene were they talk it out and Hunk is introduced to everyone and Leo is like, “Oh yeah that’s my brother, hes a nerd.” And Pidge takes a little longer too come around to Lance but when she does. Oh boy. Pidge hugs and cuddles Lance to death and won’t let him go because she doesn’t want Lance to forget her like her family had too in the awe of his new friends. Next is actually Shiro, and his is a little less emotional, and they just talk it out about how he wants too be Lance’s friend, always. So… Keith.

Keith, golden boy of the ares cabin, can not deal with the thought of Lance abandoning him for his new friends especially Jason mother fucking Grace. And all of his siblings are like, oh just confess to him you wimp, except Clarisse because she gets hot hard it is to love someone who is in love with another person Selina  so she doesn’t tell him anything, instead, she tells him he should talk too Nico about it- Because lets face it, Nico is great and probably waited around doing that mutual pinning thing for will for like two weeks until they got together (This disregards canon because canon is dumb when it comes to how they got together) and he knows. So Keith goes to Nico, they talk, and Keith tries to confess to Lance. Except he accidentally challenges Jason too a duel instead. And holy chicken fry, Lance ain’t prepared. Like to see his major crush, challenge his minor crush, and have his minor crush accept? (Piper’s laughing her ass off and taking bets.) He is shook. Especially when Keith tells him in the Poseidon cabin that hes fighting for Lance.  So the day of the fight he walks over to Lance and tells him to keep his eyes on him, and Lance does. Keith wins- to everyone’s surprise and since no one won in the betting pool Piper keeps all the winnings and he just, kisses Lance. And Lance kisses back. So now Lance has family, friends, and a boyfriend- BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE

Because Sally is the best mom ever to exist, she invites Lance over, and just smothers him in affection, because his own mom is in Cuba. He cries, she makes cookies, Paul is happy to have another person that they consider a son, and Sally is going to give birth soon, its going to be great. 

evakerlitvet  asked:

Hi Jo!So I'm super excited for the next ep, I'm hoping that it'll fix all of the mistakes that were made in 2x07. until that, let me sneak in a random question into your ask box: do you think malec call each other nicknames/pet names?

Hi Nitsa! Same here, I’m excited and I hope my internet here is strong enough to sustain my livestream~

I mean, we all know Magnus uses pet names with like, everybody. Biscuit here, darling there, sweetheart over at the back. So Alec isn’t surprised when he’s fumbling around the kitchen and Magnus shows up, one hand combing through bed hair and another muffling a yawn and mumbles out “what’s cooking, pumpkin?” As much as Alec thinks that’s endearing, he hates that he has to suppress the idea that he has used the nickname on one too many lovers. So the next time they’re kissing in bed; hands under each other’s shirts, long legs tangled in an organised mess and Alec slides his fingers along Magnus’ ribcage just right, tearing a breathless “Alexander” out of him, Alec steels himself. 

“I love it when you call me that,” Alec pauses, a few seconds longer, betraying the casual tone of his voice. And Magnus is astute, even when he’s seconds away from dragging Alec down towards him because his lips are not where they should be, and he drags out, voice thick as honey, “Of course, my Alexander”, with a steady gaze. And Alec knows that Magnus gets it, and he finally seals Magnus’ lips with his.

-

Alec’s awkward with nicknames. Now that he’s thinking about it, he realises that the only one whom he calls with a nickname is Izzy and doesn’t everyone call her that? Well, except Magnus; and now that he’s thinking of him, he’s troubled over whether Magnus would like to have that: a pet name. Darling? Too common, Magnus practically calls everybody that. Baby? No way, he’d rather die than have to call someone that. Mags? Alec makes a face. 

“What’s with that face? Wait, don’t tell me Izzy made this,” Jace glares at the spoonful of stew he was about to put into his mouth and his eyes dart between Alec and the pot in between them. Alec’s confused for a moment but he shakes his head and puts his spoon down, to which Jace sighs in relief and shoves the spoon into his mouth. 

“Jace, what did you call your…girlfriends? I mean, did you call each other using pet names? Does it come naturally? Like, how do you suddenly go from calling someone by name to calling them by something else? What’s that something else? How-”

“Wait, wait, wait. Slow it down, bud. Are you talking about things like babe, princess or things like that?” Alec nods solemnly at the question and Jace’s confusion suddenly turns to smugness. He was about to make a jab at that but Alec shook his head and Jace dropped it out of kindness from seeing his parabatai so troubled. He merely shrugs and offers, “Don’t think too much about it; it’s gonna come out forced if you overthink it, and yes, I can totally see you overthinking right now so don’t even deny it, I know you Alec,” Alec huffs but he takes the advice to heart and tries not to wince when he has to get his boyfriend’s attention and has to settle for “Magnus”. 

And when it finally happens, he just has to mess it up, or so he thinks, when he picks up a phone call mid-mission and in his distraction, he answers with, “Hi love, what’s up,” after which there’s a silence that’s a beat too long and Alec realises that he’s fucked up because he hasn’t even said the three words and this order is totally wrong and oh god, Magnus doesn’t feel the same yet, does he? He’s this close to flinging his phone to the furthest end of the world when Magnus clears his throat and replies, voice a little unsteady, “Well, Alexander, I love you too, if that’s what you were trying to say,” and Alec is amazed by how Magnus always knows and never in his life had he wanted to be a warlock so badly just so he could portal to right where Magnus was and kiss the stars out of him.

mrjakeperalta  asked:

holy fuckign,,, I'd like to thank god and also jesus,,,,, and u,,,,

IT’S DONE 3 HOURS LATER LMAO

HERE IT IS…………..THE SMALL BOOKSTORE AU

The most beautiful woman Jake has ever seen in his entire life is standing on the sidewalk outside of the bookstore across the street from Sal’s.

He’s staring, his slice of pepperoni pizza frozen halfway between his greased-up paper plate and his mouth (which is currently hanging open - either in preparation for this bite or due to his sudden and forceful mesmerization, he’ll never really know), and Charles hasn’t noticed yet. Jake’s hyper-aware of him, of the buzz of his voice, reduced to a low hum in his own ears now; to his left, Gina is slumped over, visibly bored with the conversation and thus completely invested in her phone.

Good, Jake thinks rather weakly. One less person to notice.

The woman across the street appears to be scrubbing one of the front windows meticulously, and in some distant part of Jake’s mind he recalls the business that previously occupied that very stoop - a tattoo parlor with a penchant for filling the windows with bumper stickers. The woman keeps having to toss handfuls of long, glossy black hair over her shoulder; as he watches, she finally appears to get sick of it all and ties it all back in a messy bun down near the nape of her neck, and the wisps of hair she misses curl lazily against the long column of her neck.

She is completely and utterly breathtakingly beautiful, and he hasn’t even gotten more than a glimpse at her profile.

Keep reading

gab-soon  asked:

Hi :) I've been following you for like forever. I think your art is amazing and it really gives me lots of inspiration to paint. I always wanted to create my own comic and now finally after years I have some good ideas but tbh I'm a little lost about how should I bring it to another level from just few ideas. Do you have any tips on how to work on your story? And how long it took you from idea to the point you started drawing Carciphona?

Hi! Thank you for writing : D I’m glad you like my art!

Even though I do try to become better, at the end of the day I do everything I do mostly for fun so I don’t have proper knowledge to back it up. Everything I can answer is based on my experience, right or wrong, but I’ll try my best to theorize what I think is the right answer for you.

I started the comic not because I thought I was ready; I just thought it’d be fun to draw the comic and I already had some material (keyword some). In these 12 years of drawing Carciphona, even in the recent years, long after I’ve started the comic, I’ve made some pretty major changes that made the story and plot almost unrecognizable compared to before.

The gist of my advice is just don’t worry about reaching a goal or next level for your story, that’s a really objective way to think about creativity and it usually makes you worry more than be creative.Even if you can’t come up with anything, you needn’t feel lost, just don’t write anything. It’s not always time to write or create. Think over what your world is for now and wait. When you know your story better, you will have more questions that will lead to more ideas for your story, just like how you won’t know you need to learn anatomy until you’ve actually drawn something and then saw the gaping hole in your knowledge about anatomy.

This to me is immersion and I only like writing when I feel immersed in what I am working with. Immersion takes time, so no matter how hard you work, it’s inevitable that you will have to give your story idea months or years to really feel natural for you to work with, and this is probably why you are feeling “lost” now–because you don’t really know your world and character all that well yet to be curious about its unknowns, and you want to move forward but you cannot. It’s likely that instead of patiently waiting for that understanding and then expanding on what you already have, you’d want to make your world more exciting by adding details like more races of people/creatures, more characters, more locations etc. This is a lot easier to do as you can see tons of characters created with little context on a daily basis, but if you force it to become more complex this way just to satisfy your standard, you are most likely going to come up with a story that is unrelatable, irrelevant and not believable (ie. character’s actions feel arbitrary instead of natural, the world consists of races and groups of characters that have no relation with each other or with the world from which they came).

I enjoy the slower method of waiting to feel immersed with my characters and world over time, and then being able to naturally continue the story by asking myself questions with that unconscious understanding of how the world and the characters are like. I think it’s important to think of your story in an inquisitive manner rather than authoritative manner. Rather than tell your world/your characters what they are, ask your characters/your world, why it is the way it is. What is the reason for certain cities to be so much more guarded or prosperous compared to others? what do they have that others don’t? Why do the characters feel so willing to travel instead of staying home? What does that say about the climate of society and civilian life, and maybe the lack of attachment they feel towards home and loved ones? who are these loved ones and what are their lives like, even if they will never appear in the story? Asking questions in this manner makes you explore the background which grounds the world and makes it the way it is–the “why” and “how”–rather than making up random facts and characters just like filler–the “what”. It makes it so that your world and their events, and your characters and their lives, exist within the context of the people and things that surround them, rather than just existing because you willed it. This makes for a solid foundation by giving you lots of gaps of information to fill and be creative about, all with information relevant and reasonable to your world. By working like this, I’ve never hit a wall with my writing in the sense that I am out of things to do with my world; I might have days or months where I cannot solve one puzzle about my story world, but I know it is not a loss of direction as much as simply another aspect of my world that will eventually make sense to me as I understand my story more in time.

good luck!

I am so overjoyed at the thought of CS finally getting married, but also at the fact that Jennifer and Colin are just as excited as we are. We are so lucky to have two wonderful actors that care so much about their characters and their pairing. They are just as excited as the fans are and are excited to share it with us.
I love them so much and am getting really emotional thinking about how far Captain Swan has come since “I can’t take a chance that I’m wrong about you” and “the time for making deals is done… just as I am done with you” and “that was a one time thing” and having Jen and Colin behind the characters - I don’t think anyone could have done it better. No one else could steer the ship.
I’m just so excited and impatient and I can’t wait to see for the musical episode AT ALL, I HAVE NO CHILL.

Sap post, out.

Your Move

The nine times Simon and Baz prank each other and the one time they don’t

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10

March 29

Simon

Technically, I might have cheated a bit.  Then again, we never clearly laid out any rules.  We never actually decided that each player had to wait until the next day to lay their trap, it was just sort of understood.  So if I made preparations the night before, I would say that it’s completely fair.  After all, how can you break a rule if none were ever written?

           When Baz gets up before me to use the shower, I hide my grin under my blankets.

           I dress as the water runs.  

           I take the planned precautions and double-check that I’ve remembered to wear my necklace.

           When the water shuts off, I take my position, sitting on my bed with my back against my pillow, waiting.  The picture of calm, even though I’m buzzing with anticipation.

           I count down in my head as I hear the curtain slide back.

           Three, two, one…

           “SNOW!”

           Zero.

           “Problem, Baz?”

           “WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?”

           “I should think it would be obvious.”

           “YOU’D BETTER START RUNNING, SNOW!”

           I don’t move.  I stay exactly where I am and straighten out a crease in my shirt. Crowley, I’m starting to act like him.

           There’s a steady stream of cursing from the other side of the door.  Normal cursing, not magical cursing, though he sounds angry enough to curse me right off the school grounds.

           When he cracks the door open, he doesn’t lean around to look at me.  

           “Oh, come on,” I tell him, “get it over with.”

           He takes a step forward and emerges, wearing only a towel around his waist, half of his body hidden behind the door.  Part of my brain registers the fact that I’ve never seen him with this little clothing on, but I’m very much distracted by his hair.  It’s slicked back with shower water, a few strands hanging in front of his eyes, and it’s blond.  Yellow-blond.

           A smirk takes control of my face.  “Well, that clearly worked, then.”

           “Do you have any idea how bloody dead you are.”

           “Could you hurry up in there?  I’d like to use the bathroom.  Oh, and it’s your move.”

           He slams the door in my face and I bury my laughter in my pillow.

           He takes an exaggeratedly long time to get ready, probably to spite me, or maybe he’s busy trying to magic the bleach out of his hair.  Trixie told me it was extra-long lasting, but it is only Normal bleach with no magical properties.  Maybe I did charm it to be a bit stronger, but he could probably magic his hair back to normal if he tried long enough.  I just wait on my bed, studying my nails casually like I assume he does when he’s tormenting me.

           When Baz finally reappears in the doorway, he’s fully clothed and his hair is still blond, but it’s different now.  It’s dry, and instead of yellow his hair is a soft white. He hasn’t slicked it back like he usually does, just lets it fall around his face like snowflakes.

           His skin is so pale that white-blond hair shouldn’t look good on him.

           But it does.

           It’s light and soft and it makes his heavy gray eyes look gentle, even though he’s currently using them to shoot daggers at me. It’s striking against the green of his uniform, and it’s like he’s turned from a vampire into a wood elf, tall and elegant and smooth.

           His hair looks so soft, freshly washed like this, that my hands actually twitch.  I want to take a lock and rub it between my fingertips.      

           Crowley, it looks good.

           There’s a lurch in my stomach, unfamiliar and cold, and I don’t know what it means.  Not that it matters, I’m definitely not thinking about my stomach right now.

           “I thought I told you to run,” Baz growls through his teeth, his cheeks pink.  Maybe from shower steam, maybe from embarrassment.  I wonder what my cheeks look like right now, with how I feel them heating up.

           “I’m not stupid, Baz,” I reply calmly, even though there’s a weird shiver working its way down my back.  “If I leave the room, you’ll just throw me down the stairs or something.  This is the safest place for me right now.”

           “Maybe I’ll throw you out the window and let the merwolves have you.”

           “Try opening the window, Baz, see how far you get.”

           “What did you do to it?”

           “Nothing serious, just a simple precaution, but you won’t be getting it open.”

           “What if I carried you out the door?”

           “You’d have to fight me to get me there, and I don’t think the Anathema would like that very much.”

           He seethes at me for another few seconds before storming out the door.  I can hear his angry steps all the way down the tower.

           I stay where I am for I don’t know how long. It’s like I can’t move, and my stomach is still feeling hollow.  Not in a hungry way, more like someone took one of my organs out and left a giant empty spot, and now the rest of my organs are frantically shifting around to try and fill the space.  I’m cold and hot at the same time.

           “Crowley,” I say aloud to the empty room.

           It looked good.

 ***

           Penny and I are out on the hill when she sees what I’ve done.

           “Mor-gana, Simon,” she breathes, her eyes wide.  “How are you even still alive?”

           I shake my head, watching Baz as he disappears into the castle.  His hair is even more ethereal in the light of day.  I can only imagine what he would look like if the sun were shining.  He’d have a fucking halo.

           “The better question is, why has he left it like that?” Penny muses, squinting at the doors even after Baz has passed through them.  “Couldn’t he magic it back to normal?”

           “Maybe the dye is too strong.”

           “How exactly did you pull this off, anyway?”

           “I poured hair bleach in his shampoo last night.”

           She shakes her head with a disbelieving laugh. “Crowley, Simon,” she says, “when is this game going to end?”

           I shrug.  I hadn’t thought about it.  “When there’s a winner?”

           “And how do you determine a winner?”

           “Maybe just until one of us concedes.”

           “I know you two,” she scoffs, “that’s not going to happen.”

           Something about her saying you two makes my heart beat a little louder in my ears for just a second.

           “So let me get this straight,” she continues. “First you changed his sugar into salt, so he turned your scones to rock.  Then came the necklace thing, and the glue on the doorknob.  I know he kept turning your music up yesterday, but there’s something missing in between.  Did you forfeit that day?”

           “No.”

           “What did you do?”

           The memory is sour and I grimace.  “I don’t want to talk about it?”

           “Why?  Did it not work?”      

           “I cursed him.”

           “So what?  He’s cursed you loads of times.”

           “I gave him nightmares.”

           Penny doesn’t answer for a second.  “You did what?”

           “They were only supposed to be minor ones, but something went wrong, they were never supposed to hurt him.”

           “How bad were they?”

           I want to scrub the memory from my eyelids. “I had to wake him up because he kept shouting.”

           “Simon, that’s… terrible, actually.”

           “I told you, they weren’t supposed to be scary.”

           “Still, you attacked the mind.  Worse, you attacked the subconscious.”  She looks at me like I’ve taken her food without asking. “Does he know it was you?”

           “I don’t think so.”

           “Is that why you didn’t get mad yesterday when he pranked you?”

           “Why would I get mad?” I shrug.  “I deserved it.”

           “Huh.”

           “What?”

           “I never thought I’d see the day that you felt bad for hurting Baz.”

           I shake my head.  “He might be a twat, but you didn’t hear him.  No one deserves whatever he was dreaming.”

           Penny watches me thoughtfully.  “Hmm,” she muses.

           “What?”

           “Nothing, just… maybe you guys don’t hate each other as much as you think you do.”

*** 

           Baz’s hair is still white-blond later at night when we turn in.  I still have to consciously remind myself to stop staring at it.

           He hasn’t said anything to me since this morning, but I don’t think it’s because he’s mad.  More just the normal silence that exists between us when we’re not actively fighting or shouting abuse at each other.

           I wonder as he turns out the lights if his hair has always looked so soft, or if I’ve just noticed it now.  When he turns it black again, will I still have the urge to touch it?  Is it something I’ve always wanted to do but only just realized?

           A thought occurs to me as his breathing starts to deepen across the room.  “Hey, Baz.”

           “What, Snow?”

           “We match.”

           It’s ridiculous and not even close to true. My hair is the blonde of honey, while his is currently the blonde of fucking snow, but that makes it even more ironic and, naturally, even more funny to me.

           Baz doesn’t say anything, just sits up and punts one of his pillows at me, and I can’t hold in a giggle when it hits me.

awaywiththeclouds  asked:

Prompt! (Feel free to ignore, this might make no sense as its 3am so..) After Jake and Amy get married Charles will occasionally just ask for "Peralta" purely so he can watch them both turn round and do the strange giggle he did with the marshmallows

Someone changed her desk nameplate.

Strangely, Jake notices it before Amy. It’s approximately five minutes into their first day back after the honeymoon, still a bit sunburned and moony-eyed but also totally ready to get back to work. Amy’s hung back a moment, still chatting with Terry about the resort they’d stayed at, and while Jake had taken a moment to appreciate the way the wedding ring on her finger somehow made the diamond on her engagement ring catch the lights above her even more than before, he’d turned away to head toward their desks.

His gaze had basically drifted over the nameplates (the way it always does first thing in the morning), but the altered initials had caught his attention, drawing him up short five feet from their pod. He’d stared. He’d even blinked a few times.

But no matter how many times he’d tried to clear his vision, he was still reading DET. AMY PERALTA and DET. JAKE PERALTA.

“Jake?” Amy’s voice at his shoulder snaps him out of his trance. His head swivels toward her, meeting her confused gaze with one of his own. “What’s up?”

“Look,” he points at their desks. She looks, stares, but still has that same bewildered expression on her face when she looks back up at him. “Seriously? You don’t see it?”

“See what?”

He scoffs, drops his messenger bag right there on the floor, and heads straight to her desk. She advances a few paces as he walks, stooping to grab the strap of his messenger bag, bringing her up closer than he’s expecting when he whirls back toward her, but he still smirks - one part triumphant, one part bemused - when he points to her name plate. “Detective Amy Peralta?”

She furrows her brows, staring at the nameplate like she’s never seen one before. “Who did that?” She asks, glancing at Gina.

Gina grunts, eyes glued to her phone, clearly disinterested.

“The Peraltas are back!” A familiar voice squeals from near the stairs.

“Well that answers that question.” Jake sighs. Charles is practically crawling over the small throng of people standing just outside the bullpen gate, his face flushed with excitement, eyes glued to Jake and Amy.

“I told you I wasn’t changing my last name, Charles,” Amy says, her exasperation clear in both her tone and her facial expression. Charles appears not to have heard her; he’s too busy bouncing on the balls of his feet and pointing at the nameplate.

“Charles, buddy,” Jake tries, rounding Amy’s guest chair to take his messenger bag from her. “What’d you do with her old nameplate?”

His grin falls away, replaced by a look of indignation. “What, praytell, are you insinuating? I dare say this is an utterly baseless accusation - nay, an act of pure treachery -”

“Check your drawers,” Amy interrupts. Jake pulls the top one open and rolls his eyes - the nameplate is tucked between two bags of gummy bears.

“I thought maybe after spending a week officially married you might change your mind,” Charles says dejectedly as Jake passes her old nameplate to her across their desks.

“It was super thoughtful of you, dude, but Amy’s definitely staying a Santiago.” Jake says as he drops to his seat and powers his computer on. Amy nods as she kneels beside her desk to slide the new nameplate out of place. “Besides, we’re hella married now, so she could change her last name to Fartmonster for all I care. Side note, Ames, let’s stop by the DMV and change your last name to Fartmonster after work tonight!”

“No.”

“You’re the most boring wife I’ve ever had.” She sticks her tongue out at him, and he responds in kind. “Anyways, point is, we’re hella married. Isn’t that what you’ve wanted all along?”

Amy snorts, but Charles seems to very seriously contemplate Jake’s words. “I guess.” He says slowly. “Are you guys sure, though? Like, have you really thought it through?”

“We’ve really thought it through.” Jake confirms.

“Well that makes things complicated.”

From the corner of his eye, he sees Amy’s head snap up; when he turns toward her, her eyes are narrowed in accusation. “What else did you do?” She asks.

Charles makes a noise, a loud scoff, that echoes through the bullpen. “Unjustified betrayal, my dear woman! How dare you!”

Charles.”

Charles clenches his jaw and takes a small step backwards. “I need to go cancel a few orders I made last week that are totally unrelated to what we were just talking about.”

He scurries away and Jake chuckles, shaking his head as he turns back toward Amy. “I was just kidding about the most boring wife I’ve ever had thing. You’re, like, the fifth most boring wife I’ve ever had.”

“Flattery will get you nowhere, Peralta.” She says primly, her attention fixated on her desk calendar despite the smile threatening to curl the corners of her mouth upward.

He sighs, melting into his seat. “I bet if we asked Terry right now we could get an extension on our honeymoon. Holt still hasn’t seen us.” Jake offers.

Amy’s head tilts to her left a few degrees, an affectionate smile on her face. “Maybe,” she says, spinning the new nameplate between her fingers. “But we’ve got a ton of work to catch up on here.”

He shrugs, and she laughs. “Ready to be the most badass married couple detective police partners of all time?”

Her affection is dimmed by her frown. “That was a grammatically horrible way of phrasing it,” she says, “but…yeah, definitely.”

His computer flashes to life then, drawing his attention away from her. He glances back a moment later, just in time to catch her carefully tucking the new nameplate into her purse.

technicallydeliciouspeach  asked:

Hello~ Could you please do some hc on how the rfa would react to mc having a huge scar? I'm sorry if I'm being pathetic but well... I have a huge one on my chest from an operation on my heart. I'm kinda used to it now but today one person said that it's disgusting and I had no idea it would hurt me so much. I love your writing. Thank you for everything you do

I’M SO SORRY THIS IS SO LATE >___<

I really wanted to do this request asap to make you feel better… but I was busier for the past few weeks than I expected… And we have a LOT of requests in the inbox. 

(Plus my sprained ankle from saving a dog on the road, and a virus—btw both happened the respective days my horoscope sign was ranked 12th on Oha Asa horoscope D: Oha Asa is never wrong.)

Anyway enough with that!! I didn’t write Jaehee’s because I’m not always able to imagine her reaction… Onto the very late fic—I am still very very sorry that this took so long ;^;

–R.I.


RFA Reacts: MC with a Huge Scar

Yoosung

  • We all know he’s the somewhat shy, reluctant type when it comes to doing… explicit stuff
  • So it took a while for him to find out about the scar on your chest
  • When he saw it, his eyes were WIDE with shock
  • And that made you absolutely fucking nervous.
  • Was he… disappointed that you didn’t have perfect skin? That when he touched you during intimate moments, he would have to run his hands over your scar and maybe feel.. disgusted?
  • “Are you… disappointed?” you bit your lip, trying to control the anxious feelings boiling in your chest
  • He frantically shook his head, his eyes still wide in horror at your chest.
  • “MC… who did this to you?” he choked out, tears welling up in his eyes. “Why do you have this…?”
  • Confused, you hesitantly replied, “What… do you mean? It’s from a surgery I had on my heart, a while back…”
  • Immediately, relief replaced the fear on his face. He pulled you close, breathing shakily.
  • “Oh god… I’m so glad… I was so scared that someone hurt you…”
  • You still weren’t sure how he felt about your scar. “You don’t mind? That there’s this… thing on my chest.”
  • He continued to bury his head on your shoulder. “No, MC… I would never be disappointed in you about something like this. I fell in love with you because I enjoy being with you, not because of how you look.”
  • You returned his embrace with trembling hands, holding him tightly. “…Thank you. Just. Thank you.”

Zen

  • Usually, Zen took you out on his day-offs from work
  • But for some reason, you had rejected his invitation that day without reason
  • Worried, he visited you at home, wondering if you were sick.
  • He even brought you soup.
  • You were very reluctant in opening the door to him, feeling shitty. But you’d feel guilty letting him wait outside for hours (because he WILL do that for you) and decided to let him in
  • He was like a puppy greeting their master home, jumping onto you and hugging you as soon as he saw you
  • You winced slightly as his hard abs ahemchest bumped against your scar
  • It’s not like it really hurt anymore, but it was more of an internal pain
  • You avoided his excited gaze and his grin gradually turned to a frown. “What’s wrong, MC?”
  • You sighed. “You know how I had that surgery a while back? I… someone told me it looked disgusting today.”
  • His frown deepened, eyes narrowing into a glare. Despite his very obvious anger, he maintained a cold, low voice. “Who said it.”
  • You shook your head. “It doesn’t matter who said it, more that someone actually commented about the scar in the first place…”
  • His eyes turned sad. “But you’re very beautiful in my eyes… If anyone insults how you look, I’ll always be here to feed you endless compliments about you, because I am in love with you and I want to make you feel better any way I can. MC… for every word that hurts you, I’ll give you ten times the love and care to make you smile again.”
  • You let out a small smile. His words did help a bit. You simply nodded quietly in response to his statement, and he returned a grin, pecking you on the lips.

Jumin

  • One of the bodyguards had informed him about how you’d locked yourself in your room all day. Overwhelmed with a sudden concern, he left work early, not even bothering to clean up the documents on his desk. No, you were a higher priority than his business.
  • He got home in record time, urging Driver Kim to speed on a route with tolls so he could return to your side immediately.
  • In a panic, he whizzed past the bodyguards and maids at his apartment as he rushed to your room. “MC!?” He was panting.
  • Hearing his voice, you froze inside the room. Why was he home so early…?
  • You’d planned to wipe away your tears and convince yourself you were fine before he returned so that he wouldn’t have to worry about you. You didn’t like making him stress out about you. He had so many other important matters to attend to, after all.
  • But he was here.
  • And secretly, you felt happy that he cared enough to come check on you. Not that you would ever admit it out loud. It just felt good to have someone worrying sometimes.
  • “MC… please open the door, and tell me what’s wrong,” he pleaded, knocking on the door repeatedly.
  • You quietly stepped out of the room, hesitantly meeting his gaze. It was a dark storm in his panicked eyes.
  • He looked over you quickly, sighing in relief that you appeared to be fine, physically, at least.
  • His hands were trembling when they caressed yours, bringing it to his lips to smother in kisses. “I heard that you’d locked yourself in your room today. Did something happen?”
  • You slowly nodded, knowing very well that he would catch your lie. And so you told him how someone had made a hurtful comment about your scar.
  • He knew fully well that you could be sensitive about it, even though you were usually okay. So he listened quietly as you spoke, letting him comfort you with a warm hug and calming hair strokes.
  • No matter how calm he usually appears on the outside, Jumin loved you enough to make a fool of himself for even the little things. Because he loves you for who you are, for every moment you’ve shared together, and everything you’ve ever done for him.

Seven

  • He’d actually been by your side when it had happened. When someone made fun of your scar.
  • And Seven was absolutely furious, holding himself back from punching them, only because you had quietly told him not to, in a pained voice.
  • The car ride back home was silent. He was quietly fuming in anger, while you were feeling self-conscious about yourself.
  • Then suddenly, he went off the road you usually took, calmly driving on the highway elsewhere.
  • “Where are we going?” you asked, bewildered by the sudden change in route.
  • “Somewhere. Together.”
  • You stared out the window, feeling calm from the ride as the scenery whizzed by.
  • When the car finally stopped, you noticed that you had pulled up to a hot spring motel.
  • “We’re gonna be staying here for the night,” he grinned. “So you can relax!”
  • You felt touched by his actions. He wasn’t the best at comforting people verbally considering his own history… but he always knew what to do to make you feel better.
  • “But… how did you make a reservation for us so quickly?” you asked curiously.
  • “Heheh~ That’s! A! Secret!” he winked.
In the Rough

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5 (you are here), part 6, based on @skygemspeaks’s prompt



Previously: As soon as Yuuri has settled into his role as Prince Victor’s personal bodyguard, his childhood friend Prince Phichit appears. Yuuri fears for his secret, as there is no doubt that his friend will be more than surprised to find Yuuri here, in the palace of the Nikiforovs.

Yuuri’s blood runs cold when he hears the crier announce the incoming royal.

“Presenting His Royal Highness, Crown Prince of the Southeast, Phichit Chulalont!”

Of all the royals that could possibly be visiting during Yuuri’s tenure here, the only one that could possibly be worse than Phichit would be Mari. He and Prince Phichit (affectionately dubbed Phichan by a three year old Yuuri) have been friends since Phichit was born, and there’s no one in the world that knows Yuuri better. They played together as children, and rode together during their many visits to each other’s respective kingdoms. They even lived together for a time, when they took a few years to travel for their schooling. In fact, it’s not uncommon (or wasn’t uncommon, Yuuri guiltily thinks) for the two of them to sleep in the same bed; they’ve been doing it since they were children. At one point Yuuri’s parents had even wondered whether the two of them should be betrothed, but they both vehemently refused. They were much better off as friends, they knew. Besides, Phichit is in love with one of his guards, which Yuuri mercilessly teases (teased) him about regularly.

Yuuri has no doubt that Phichit has been made aware of his disappearance, but he also remembers writing the boy several letters when Mari first started to pull away. He can only hope that when– not if –Phichit recognizes him, that he manages to put the two together before he exposes Yuuri.

Luckily, Victor is still not here (though he will be soon) and the Tzar is overseeing Prince Yuri’s lessons after one too many ditching attempts. For once, Yuuri is alone in the throne room.

By the time Phichit and his entourage (Seung-Gil, Leo, and Guang-Hong, all of whom Yuuri knows well) arrive in a throne room, Yuuri is kneeling, as is proper. He’s sweating from nerves, and it’s all he can do to keep his voice from shaking when he speaks in Phichit’s native language, accent near perfect from years of practice.

“I formally apologize for making you wait. His Highness will be here soon, so please, make yourself comfortable.”

He hears Phichit’s sharp intake of breath and knows he’s been found out. “On your feet, soldier. Let me see your face.”

Slowly, so slowly, Yuuri rises to face him. He can hear footsteps coming from a direction of Victor’s bedchambers, and meets Phichit’s eyes desperately. In the few seconds that it takes for Victor and Otabek to reach a throne room, the two of them reach a silent agreement, a complex conversation that’s only possible because of how well they know each other.

A wide-eyed, desperate look. I’ll explain everything, I promise.

A look of disbelief. Yuuri, is it really you?

Lowered eyes for just a second. Later. I’ll tell you everything, just please play along.

The barest hint of tears. I missed you.

Bowed head. …I missed you too, Phichan.

A hand on the shoulder. You’ll explain later?

A tiny nod. I swear.

A light squeeze on the shoulder before pulling away. Okay.

The other three pairs of eyes widen in recognition as well, but they stay silent. If their prince isn’t going to say anything, Yuuri is sure that they won’t either; those men are nothing if not loyal.

“Yuuri,” Victor whines, jumping on his back with his entire bodyweight. “I missed you!”

Yuuri can’t help but glance over at Phichit self-consciously. The boy looks amused, eyebrow raised and arms crossed. Yuuri can read him like a book, but he can’t afford to react any differently from how he normally would, or Otabek may suspect something.

He pries Victor off gently but firmly. “Victor, you’re being extremely rude. Besides, it’s been less than an hour since I saw you last.”

“An hour too long,” Victor says, kissing Yuuri’s hand dramatically. Yuuri privately agrees with him, but that’s an issue for another time, especially since Victor is just teasing. “Though I suppose you’re right. I apologize, Your Highness. Welcome back to our palace. I assume that your trip went without issue?”

“Of course.” Phichit says with a mischievous smile, glancing at Yuuri for a fraction of a second. “I’m more than glad to be back, especially now that I’m finally here. I see you’ve inducted a new member of your staff.”

Victor’s grin is blinding, and Yuuri doesn’t know how to process it. He’s noticed that Victor carries himself like a man who has known loneliness; it seems as though he’s attached to Yuuri in the same way that a child would attach itself to a blanket. “Isn’t he great? So polite and well behaved. I’m proud to call him my personal bodyguard.”

“May I ask his name?” Phichit’s eyes sparkle with concealed mirth that Yuuri is sure only he can see.

“Of course!” Victor claps his hands once in excitement; he always does seem to enjoy showing Yuuri off. “His name is Yuuri Nishigori, of Yutopia. He saved my life in the forest, so I decided to bring him here and give him a job as a reward.”

Guang-Hong laughs when he hears Yuuri’s “name,” but manages to cover it up as a cough. “Excuse me.”

Yuuri gives him a severe look. Don’t forget I know about your affair with Leo. Not, of course, that Phichit would care, but it’s nice to have some blackmail material on his friends once in a while.

“Excuse my guard, he’s laughing at my antics. I must admit to some deception, Prince Victor,” Phichit says with a small grin.

Victor raises and eyebrow in that way that Yuuri has noticed means that he’s mildly amused. “Oh?”

Phichit nods. “You see, Yuuri and I have already met.”

Oh no, Phichit please no. Yuuri’s grip on the hilt of his sword anxiously.

“It’s a story quite similar to yours, actually.” Phichit smiles at Yuuri. I’ve got this. “I was travelling the continent for school a few years ago, and I wandered from the caravan of boredom. I found a view I particularly liked and wandered too close to the edge of a cliff. Your guard saved my life.”

Yuuri remembers that day, actually. Phichit had scared the life out of him, wandering off like that.

“Phichan, why would you go so close to the edge? You could have died!” Yuuri could feel his heartbeat in his throat. “If I’d lost you…”

Phichit was shaking, his usual grin far from his face. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“In fact, we became friends soon after.” Well, that’s a bold-faced lie, but Yuuri can’t expect anything different if he wants to keep his secret safe.

Victor looks at Yuuri with wide eyes. “Wow! My Yuuri is so amazing, why didn’t you tell me that you knew another royal?”

I know several, actually. Phichit just happens to be the one that’s here. “It, uh, it never came up, I suppose.”

“You were named for the missing prince, right Yuuri?” Phichit cuts in.

When Yuuri nods, Victor looks confused. “What do you mean, missing prince?”

“Ah, I forget how cut off this country is from its neighbors,” Phichit says, looking apologetic and slightly sad. The sadness, Yuuri can tell, is entirely real. He feels a sharp twinge of guilt about causing it. “Yutopia’s prince, Yuuri Katsuki, went missing several months past. He’s a very dear friend of mine.”

There’s a short period of silence, where Yuuri is sure that Victor is trying to find the appropriate words to respond to a revelation like this.

“Victor, if I may make a suggestion,” Otabek says, startling them all. “Pardon my intrusion into your conversation, but perhaps, for the duration of the prince’s stay, Nishigori should stay with his company. It may make the prince more comfortable, and I am willing to take over for him for and few days.”

Yuuri blinks. Otabek has just opened a way for him to spend time with Phichit and explain himself, without even knowing what he was doing.

He’s sure that Victor is about to protest, but there’s a distinct moment when any protests die. The look of absolute gratitude on Phichit’s face could melt a heart of stone.

“I… I suppose… that would be fine,” Victor manages. His hesitation confuses Yuuri, but the confusion is overpowered by something else.

He only vaguely notices the glances Victor keeps sneaking at him for the rest of the night, and he doesn’t think about what they mean. He’s going to miss spending time with Victor one on one, but it’s only for a few days. Besides, Phichit is going to be spending a lot of time in a presence of the royal family anyway, so things won’t be so different.

As soon as the two of them close the door to Phichit’s bedchamber later that night, Yuuri finds himself being tackled on all sides by four overexcited men. Leo, Guang-Hong, and Seung-Gil look skeptical when Yuuri explains his reasons for vanishing, but Phichit– Phichan, who knows how Yuuri’s mind works, who knows everything about him –nods and understands. He swears to keep the secret, as long as Yuuri promises in turn to be home in time for his sister’s coronation.

It’s enough, for now.

John and Mary’s A+ parenting

If season 12 has shown us anything, it’s how very similar John and Mary actually are. Here are some of the most obvious instances:

1. Not taking it for valid/not being happy about their son’s rightful anger and/or hurt and trying to forbid it:

“You’re right. Although I’m not too crazy about this new tone of yours, you’re right.” - John to Dean (1x21), after Dean calls him out on the fact that they were never able to reach him when they needed him. Because it’s completely unreasonable for Dean to feel angry and deeply hurt that John didn’t bother picking up the phone when Dean was dying.

“Do not give me the face.” - Mary to Dean (12x13), when he rightfully looks at her in utter disappointment and betrayal after her confession. Dean didn’t even say anything yet, but apparently he’s not even allowed to look at her in a certain way to express his feelings.

2. Looking pleased and proud when their son is catering to their every need, while he puts himself and his own choices/wishes last:

John’s speech to Dean in the hospital (2x01) and his elated smile while he talks about how proud he is of Dean for taking care of Sammy and their whole family his entire life, sacrificing his own childhood in the process. And then basically telling him to continue to do so.

Mary looking so delighted and pleased (12x14) when Dean tells her that she can make her own choices and his feelings on them don’t matter.

3. Forcing one of their children into the position of having to choose between their parent or brother, and thus causing a rift in their relationship:

John’s parentification of Dean and making him responsible for Sam’s well-being, while at the same time brainwashing him into following his orders which more often than not had nothing to do with Sam’s best interests. Thus putting Dean into the impossible position of making both of them happy with his actions (basically all their childhood and season 1).

Mary trying to convince Dean to talk to her and agree with her on working with the BMoL and when it doesn’t work, contacting Sam even though she knows that Dean is completely against it. Thus playing/manipulating them against each other and forcing Sam into the situation to pick between his mom and his brother (12x14).

4. Lamenting about what they want for their children, instead of asking them what they actually want/need.

“I want to stop losing people we love. I want you to go to school, I want Dean to have a home. I want….I want Mary alive. It’s just….I just want this to be over.” - John to Sam (1x21). It would have been in John’s power to give them at least some of these things. He could have encouraged Sam to go to college and he could have given Dean a stable home while growing up. Nobody forced him to drag his children around the country and letting them live in shitty motel rooms, when they needed exactly the opposite. But his thirst for revenge and his guilt were stronger than his need to provide some safety and support for his children.

“We’ve got a real shot here. A world without monsters. A world where you and Dean don’t have to hunt, where you can have normal lives. (…) You were going to school, to college. (…) That’s why I’m doing this. That is what I’m fighting for.” - Mary to Sam (12x14). A lovely thought, sure. But does she ever ask if that’s even what they want anymore? Sam tells her that he chose this life. He’s been content with his life and hunting during the last two seasons and at peace with himself like we’ve never seen before. Dean even told her in the very first episode after she came back that this is their life and that they’re doing something good and that it’s worth it. They’ve grown up and their lives may not be what Mary envisioned, but her desire to change the status quo comes from her own needs and guilt and nowhere else.

5. Abandoning their sons when they need them and only showing up when they feel like it/need something.

John leaving them alone for days/weeks in shitty motel rooms when they were only children. John not being accessible for them, when they desperately tried to contact him (1x09, 1x12). John deciding they’re better off on their own (1x16). John leaving Dean to rot in jail and when Dean ended up at Sonny’s place instead, taking him away when he needed him with no regard to what was going on in Dean’s life at this point (9x07). To name a few instances.

Mary leaving (12x03), when Dean and Sam were so excited and happy about getting a chance to know her and be a family. Leaving, despite Sam having told her just before that having her here fills in the biggest blank in his life (12x02). Leaving, despite the way Dean physically recoils from her when she tries to touch him because she’s hurting him so deeply by doing it (12x03). And then staying away from them, barely making any effort to get to know them, and only reaching out to them when she needs something from them (12x12, 12x13, 12x14).

6. Not being a mom/dad first.

“I stopped being your father and I became your drill sergeant.” - John to Sam (1x20). John was always “Sir” first. He was their drill sergeant, as he himself puts it. He expected blind obedience, instead of offering guidance and support. He didn’t even bother celebrating birthdays or holidays with his children.

“I am your mother, but I’m not just a mom. And you are not a child.” - Mary to Dean (12x13), after he asks her to try and be their mom for once. He never asked her to be “just a mom”. But he asked her, quite rightfully, to put them first for once. To think about how it’s been for them. And to have her throw those ugly words “You are not a child” in his face in response, when that’s exactly what his life has been like ever since he was four years old, was the worst thing to witness. Also - because I mentioned it for John, too - Christmas and Dean’s birthday have come and gone since Mary is back and considering the way Dean is being so openly disappointed about the lack of time she’s spent with them, I doubt she was there for either of those days.

I’m sure there are even more examples, but my heart hurts too much right now thinking about this. Maybe I’ll add things later (Mary is still around to provide more evidence after all).

I would have loved to make a gifset of all these instances, but sadly I haven’t got enough skill. If anyone wants to make one based on this post I’d be eternally grateful!

trenchcoatedislandgirl  asked:

Do you have any expectations for 12x19? Personally I'm a bit apprehensive. The previous two Cas heavy episodes were really well made but this time I don't know why I just have this apprehension concerning this ep. (Here's hoping I'm being unnecessarily paranoid 🍺)

I have so many expectations and theories and I am so excited for 12x19!  But on the other hand I have delved into this in detail already and I don’t want bang on too much….

We are supposed to be worried and I love this! 

All the build up and pining/separation/Cas hiatus is making us worry for and miss Cas and seeing how much Dean is worried and misses him is very exciting :) Also, again with the Destiel/Sastiel comparisons, I love how they do this, how they show that Sam still cares but Dean is just another level. Pfft. 

We are seeing so much through Dean’s eyes this season and I think it’s been done so well (e.g. all this but also the opening scene of the season with Mary, the waitress in 12x18 for example is portrayed through Dean’s eyes in terms of what she means to him (literally just a distraction etc) .

Seeing Kelly start to wonder about her choices? YES! Seeing Cas get hurt in front of Sam and Dean? YES! Seeing multiple clips and therefore an important focus on Dean being pissed at Cas and Sam kind of hovering behind still pissed but not getting too involved in this domestic fight? YESSSSSSSSS! 

I’m gonna link you to a couple of posts:

my overall season spec: 12x18 analysis & spec.

this post from @postmodernmulticoloredcloak where they/we did some spec.

this post from @bluestar86 which mirrors some of my own thoughts.

The main one that the rest of my Dean/Cas meta sits on at the moment is my break up theory which 12x19 is central to I hope, here

I feel like this black moment / break up point is going to be 12x19 (and/or 12x23 or a culmination of all of this season). 

I have strong feelings of a 6x20 parallel coming into 12x19 and I will be disappointed if we don’t some sort of full on argument and angry/sad eye-longing as a call back to this. Although I imagine as the depth of their feelings are so much stronger now Dean will be less overtly hurt and more just plain angry by this point, I’m imagining some sort of CW-okayed version of “well just F*** off then Cas”.

Originally posted by castielamigos

My best bet is on… something along the lines of: 

12x19 Dean being angry and pushing Cas away for ‘abandoning’ him  (which seems to be what the promo is showing in the brief glimpse we have). I think this is pretty much standard, easy spec, I mean, it’s not even spec at this point it’s clearly canon.

Cas probably going away with the angels as HE feels pushed away and rejected or being ‘taken’ in someway, but I have a feeling it’s going to be more the former, especially after the waitress thing shows how bad Dean is dealing and the promo shows Dean is clearly gonna be pissed

I was going to type out again my theories for 20-23 and endgame but i think they’re in the above posts … basically chosen separation 20-21, probable reconciliation, out of their hands separation from 23 into hiatus

The way the 3 episodes are titled with past, present, future connotations and just the fact that they literally can’t kill Misha or Cas off the show anyway and the heavily moved forwards Destiel storyline I am not worried for Cas overall.

So, for 12x19 - while I think it will be super painful the endgame is gonna be worth it :)

Given the overall dramatic turn of their relationship this season and all the pining, the love talk etc. the writing now means that really they CANNOT be around each other without it becoming canon or them having to back out completely (which I really don’t see them doing at this point, what would be the point of creating this whole drama this season to then just back it down to bro-talk), so really for me, they have to be separated for *reasons*, the show has backed themselves into the proverbial corner…

Hence the idea of ‘winning him back’ for s13 and some great Cas-centric stuff moving forwards. Even if it might be Cas-light in terms of screen time, as I heavily parallel s6 with s12 and therefore s7 separation to a s13 probable separation, I think he will have a great arc leading to series end…. we shall see.

The Color of You (Soulmate AU)- Lin X Reader

warnings: mentions of death, hospitals


a/n: so i finally did a soulmate au



1 year before


You woke up to the monotonous sound of your alarm on your phone and you groaned, wanting to sleep in for a couple more minutes but you knew that you had to meet your best friend for coffee today since you had canceled every other day of the week and she was excited about her soulmate.

And you were truly happy for her, you were but you had been through this with every other one of your friends.

They found their soulmate, told you how you were really missing out on something that you really didn’t want to be a part of, and they would disappear with their soulmates and eventually stop talking to you.

And it’s not like that you didn’t like the idea of having a soulmate at first- you really did.

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