I wish we'd stayed close and I could have been there for you

Broken Smiles and Heavy Hearts

Plot: Dan and you have been friends for ages, and yet, he still doesn’t know how you feel about him. When you have a panic attack and he looks after you, you’re forced to tell him you like him because you can’t do it anymore.

Warning: maybe pretty angsty idk?? Panic attack happens so please don’t read if it will trigger you. Remember, if you do suffer from any mental illness, my ask box is always open, and I’m never too busy to help. Also, I hope it’s really fluffy, but it does get a little bit heavy at the end.  

Pairing: Dan Howell x nonbinary!reader (or gender neutral/ any gender because no pronouns are really used)

Notes: is gender neutral and uses gender neutral terms to describe the reader. They/Them pronouns are used. Also, I really enjoyed writing this, and before people come at me saying I shouldn’t glorify a mental illness, please stop. I personally have anxiety attacks, and know multiple people who also do, so it’s not as if I’m talking from a inexperienced point of view. As well, I’d like to point out that when writing this, I consulted one of my friends who does have panic attacks and we agreed that perhaps, by writing this and things like this, us writers could bring awareness to a topic that is shrouded and often wildly distorted by a huge stigma.

——————————————————————

“Y/N? Where are you?”

Dan’s worried voice came from outside the room and I took deep breaths, trying so hard to hold myself together when everything inside me was falling apart. It wasn’t like this was the first time I had ever had a panic attack, but usually my anxiety attacks included dissociation and paralysis, not hyperventilating, and anyway, this was the first time Dan had ever been so close to finding out.

Since we'd first became friends, I’d hinted at it multiple times, and after making speeches and being an advocator for dealing with mental health in teens, Dan had had an idea that I suffered from something and yet, until recently, he hadn’t known what exactly what it was.

And yet, despite trusting him with nearly everything for the past 5 years, I couldn’t bring myself to let him see me like this.

As I hear the door to my room open, the hysteria in my mind rises, and my breathing becomes even more erratic at the thought of Dan finding me. My thoughts are like an ocean, pulling me in, momentarily submerging me, always taking my breath, making me choke on the water, and yet, at the horrible end of it all, I’m stuck on the shoreline, wishing I was dead.

It’s a constant heaviness in my mind, tugging at my happiness and distorting everything until I’m scared for my life. It’s a hunger burning away at my mind, and the demons just can’t be satisfied.

I tried calming myself, but I know by now it’s too late.

“Y/N…” I hear someone open the door and drop to their knees just in front of me.

I open my eyes and desperately focus on the two brown ones around a metre away.

“Hey, Y/N. Don’t worry. I’m here and I’m not leaving you. I won’t come any closer, unless you want me to, but I’m not going anywhere.”

His voice is laced with worry, and you can momentarily tell he’s holding back tears.

“I want you to breathe with me ok? I know it’s hard, but can you try for me?”

I nod, my hands shaking as I reach out for his. He takes them immediately, and holds them gently, moving a few inches closer so I don’t have to stretch.

“Inhale,” the sound of his deep breath in sounds like bragging to my panicked lungs, but I know he’s only trying to help so I attempt to replicate his breathing patterns, “Exhale.”

After a while, my breathing has become a little more normal, and Dan begins to stand up, letting go of my hands, causing the hysteria to begin creeping back, “Hey, hey I’m sorry. It’s ok. I’m just getting your meds ok? They’re still under your pillow right?“

As soon as he says this, I calm down a bit and nod, keeping the breathing patterns as I wait for him to sit back down. Within seconds, his butt hits the floor just across from me, and he hands me a glass and two pills.

Suddenly, after what seems like hours of us breathing in time, I become acutely aware of my exhaustion and gesture for Dan to come closer.

“Dan.” His head lifts immediately, and his eyes flicker with worry as he mumbles assurances, gripping my hand just a little tighter.

“Y/N. How are you now?”

“Better. But I’m tired.”

“Oh.” He looks confused and takes a moment to think before coming back with a reply, “Um. I don’t know if you can sleep. I mean what do you usually do after an attack?”

“It’s bad for some people, but if I get tired, I sleep, as long as someone is there with me. Like, in case it happens again.” I know it’s wrong to make him stay with me out of pure selfishness but something tells me he won’t mind.

“Do you want me to stay in here then?” He questions, allowing me to rest my head on his shoulder.

My fingers wrap around his bicep as I mumble my answer, “Yeah. If you don’t mind.”

“Nah, I just wanna make sure you’re ok. Anyway, it’s getting late. You should probably get changed.”

It’s in this moment, you become aware of the mess you probably look. Your clothes are practically drenched in sweat and your hair is sticking up in every direction.

“Can I wear one of your shirts?” I whisper, my lips accidentally brushing against his collarbone. A blush rushes across my cheek and I notice his body clench slightly.

“Um sure. I don’t want to leave you to go get one though….” He replies, making the air a little less awkward as he turns to look at me properly.

“Can I just wear yours?” I question, pulling my face away so I don’t end up kissing his shoulders again.

A moment of silence passes, and I seem to have made it awkward all over again.

“Yeah… um hold on a second.”  I turn my head as he pulls his shirt off.

It’s stupid but I feel so damn in love with him right now. And not just because he’s half naked.

He turns back towards me, and passes me his shirt, covering his stomach and chest as I change.

____________________________________

Before I know it, we’re lying in the bed, only centimetres away from each other.

“Why did you cover your chest? I mean, it’s not like you’ve got boobs.”

He stifles a laugh and after composing himself, replies with something that breaks my heart.

“Uhh. Well, I’m not cute or sexy and I don’t have a six-pack. I guess my low self-esteem got the better of me again.”

“Dan.”

“It’s true so…” For the second time today, I can see him holding back the tears and again, it breaks my heart.

“You dumbass. You fucking dumbass. How can you not tell?” I say, the anger getting the best of me.

But I’m not angry at him. I’m angry at the world for making him feel like this.

“What?” His head whips around to face me.

“You’re the cutest thing I’ve seen, and it hurts when you say stuff like that. You  can look after me, and Phil, and your fans, and yet you can’t look after yourself. You’re so fucking handsome, and I don’t understand how you can’t see that. Whenever I see you, my heart skips a fucking beat because I just can’t seem to get over the fact that I’m lucky enough to love you.“

“Love?”

“Yeah Dan. I love you. I know you don’t feel the same, but I love you.” I confess, my heart thumping double time.

“Who says I don’t feel the same?” He whispers, his hands resting either side of me, as he props himself up.  

“Dan. Can you kiss me?” I say, looking up at him through half closed eyes.

“Your wish is my command.” He shortly closed the gap between us and soon he gently falls on top of me, his arms giving way as he reaches for my waist and my hands run through his curly hair. The feel of his skin against mine is better than I’d imagined. His lips map out my skin, going anywhere and everywhere; he’s kissing my lips, then my neck, then my jaw. My hands stroke his bare chest and his hands travel up my borrowed shirt.

“I love you goddamnit. So fucking much. I just want you to know that I love you and I have for a while. I’m sorry for not telling you.” He whispers against my skin, and I stop to play with his curly hair.

“I love you too Dan. And I’m sorry for not telling you about my anxiety.“   

“Don’t worry. Phil accidentally let slip and I prepared myself in case it was gonna happen.”

“I love you.” I say again, pulling his hair as he lies on top of me.

"You’re such a dork.” I laugh, and he entwines our hands together.

“But you love me for it.”

“Damn right."  

Placebo lyrics sentence starters
  • "I've never been an extrovert, but i'm still breathing."
  • "I gotta get high, before I go outside."
  • "I'm in alcoholic kind of mood."
  • "I know, you've got me wrapped around your finger."
  • "I know, the past will catch you up as you run faster."
  • "I know, the last in line is always called a bastard."
  • "We were born to lose."
  • "It's either you or me."
  • "S/he stole the keys to my house and then s/he locked herself/himself out."
  • "I'm confused and racked with self-doubt."
  • "Don't you wish you'd never met her/him?"
  • "You don't care about us."
  • "You're too complicated, we should separate it."
  • "Think I'll leave it all behind, save this bleeding heart of mine."
  • "I'll take it by your side."
  • "Without you, I'm Nothing."
  • "Without you, I'm Nothing at all."
  • "Don't let me down."
  • "Your smile would make me sneeze."
  • "I'd pay to have you near."
  • "Don't forget to breathe."
  • "Another love I would abuse, no circumstances could excuse."
  • "I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind."
  • "There's nothing here but what here's mine."
  • "Never thought I'd fill with desire."
  • "Never thought I'd feel so ashamed."
  • "Never thought all this could back fire."
  • "Never thought you'd fuck with my brain."
  • "Say goodbye."
  • "You must realise that you're never alone."
  • "I'm a man, a liar."
  • "Now it takes him all day just to get an erection."
  • "Things aren't what they seem."
  • "I dream of a face that is pure as perfection."
  • "Hey motherfucker, I'm after you. I know where you live."
  • "Change your taste in men."
  • "Come back to me."
  • "Join the masquerade."
  • "I'll describe the way I feel; weeping wounds that never heal."
  • "No escaping gravity."
  • "Draw your final breath."
  • "Every time I rise I see you falling."
  • "Can you find me space inside your bleeding heart?"
  • "I was never faithful, and I was never one to trust."
  • "I'm forever black-eyed, a product of a broken home"
  • "I was never grateful, that's why I spend my days alone."
  • "I wrote this novel just for you."
  • "I wrote this novel just for you, that's why it's vulgar, that's why it's blue."
  • "Those motherfuckers got it wrong."
  • "They said I should get expensive help to fix my head."
  • "I don't care for myself."
  • "Run away from all your boredom."
  • "Run away from all your whoredom."
  • "All it takes is one decision."
  • "Run away!"
  • "You're the one who's always bruised and broken."
  • "I understand the fascination."
  • "I understand the fascination, I've even been there once or twice or more."
  • "Please don't die."
  • "It seemed a place for us to dream."
  • "Love can die."
  • "Wake up..."
  • "I've got problems with the booze, nothing left to lose."
  • "I'm faithless... I'm scared."
  • "I'm on my own for far too long."
  • "She's insane, this friend of mine."
  • "Always stays the same, nothing ever changes."
  • "Hold your breath and count to ten."
  • "Beware this troubled world."
  • "Soulmate dry your eye."
  • "Soulmates never die."
  • "Hush, it's okay."
  • "See you at the bitter end."
  • "There's something rotten down here..."
  • "Don't forget to be the way you are."
  • "The only thing you can rely on is that you can't rely on anything."
  • "Don't go and sell your soul for self-esteem."
  • "Remember me..."
  • "Well I've seen you suffer, I've seen you cry the whole night through..."
  • "I'll be your father, I'll be your mother, I'll be your lover, I'll be yours."
  • "I'll be yours."
  • "Well I've seen you suffer, I've seen you cry for days and days..."
  • "You never were a genius."
  • "Yes I know you're the jealous type."
  • "Walk away!"
  • "Protect me from what I want..."
  • "Maybe we're victims of fate."
  • "Remember when we'd celebrate? We'd drink and get high until late."
  • "Now we're all alone."
  • "Come on fallen star I refuse to let you die."
  • "I've been waiting far too long!"
  • "Be mine."
  • "I was alone, falling free..."
  • "What happened to us, what happened to me?"
  • "Baby...did you forget to take your meds?"
  • "I was alone, falling free, trying my best not to forget."
  • "I will be the one to make you crawl!"
  • "I came down to wish you an unhappy birthday."
  • "Someone call the ambulance..There's gonna be an accident."
  • "I can see in the dark."
  • "I will be the one to watch you fall."
  • "I will find you!"
  • "You're always ahead of the game, I drag behind."
  • "You possess every trait that I lack."
  • "You got A's on your algebra test, I failed and they kept me behind."
  • "I just gotta get off my chest, that I think you're divine."
  • "You let me down before."
  • "I'm medicated...How are you?"
  • "It's the pills that bring you down."
  • "It's between you and me."
  • "It's the pills that pick you up."
  • "It's the special way we fuck."
  • "Fall into you, is all I seem to do..."
  • "I'm afraid to be alone."
  • "This house is no longer a home."
  • "Don't give up on the dream!"
  • "Tear us in two, is all it's gonna do."
  • "Don't go and leave me."
  • "Please don't drive me blind."
  • "I'd fill your every breath with meaning."
  • "I'll find a place we both could hide."
  • "You don't believe me."
  • "You do this everytime."
  • "I know we're broken."
  • "Your eyes forever glued to mine."
  • "I know I broke it."
  • "I know I broke you."
  • "It's horrid to see you again."
  • "When I dream, I dream of your lips."
  • "When I dream, I dream of your kiss."
  • "When I dream, I dream of your fists."
  • "I was not honest."
  • "And I'll wait my turn,to terrorize you."
  • "Can't you see these skies are breaking?"
  • "one of a kind is all I own."
  • "I wanna try but I get annoyed."
  • "In the cold light of morning the party gets boring, you're high."
  • "In the cold light of morning,You're drunk sick from whoring and high."
  • "You are one of God's mistakes."
  • "You're a waste of skin."
  • "You're waste of space."
  • "It's a song to say goodbye."
  • "Well now you need me more than I need you."
  • "You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?"
  • "It doesn't hurt me."
  • "You don't want to hurt me."
  • "So much hate for the ones we love."
  • "Tell me, we both matter, don't we?"
  • "Let me steal this moment from you now."
  • "The way you're dancing makes me come alive."
  • "Move closer, I wanna feel your touch."
  • "The way you're moving, makes you all that I desire."
  • "You are the one who took my place."
  • "And it was a leap of faith I could not take."
  • "And it was a promise I could not make."
  • "You are getting in the way!"
  • "I have nothing left to say."
  • "I will pretend it didn't hurt."
  • "You are a cheap and nasty fake."
  • "I am the bones you couldnt break!"
  • "I always aimed to please."
  • "I nearly died."
  • "For what it's worth?"
  • "Come on walk with me."
  • "Got no friends, got no lover."
  • "I've been wasting all my time!"
  • "I got no energy to fight."
  • "I don't see the point in trying."
  • "All of my wrongs, and all my wicked ways,Will come back to haunt me."
  • "He wrote all the songs I hope to write someday."
  • "Looks like the devil is here to stay."
  • "We'll kiss and tremble with the delight."
  • "I had so very much to say."
  • "I pretended I was okay."
  • "So I haven't given up."
  • "A heart that hurts, is a heart that works."
  • "No one can take it/you away from me."
  • "I long, I burn to touch her/him/you just the same."
  • "Don't let them get their way!"
  • "There is no law we/you must obey!"
  • "Damn you all to hell!"
  • "Time will help you through..."
  • "The sound of silence grows."
  • "The two of us are rebels."
  • "The payback is here, take a look, it's all around you."
  • "You thought you'd never shed a tear."
  • "This ain't no singing in the rain."
  • "You can run but you can't hide!"
  • "No one here gets out alive."
  • "Breathe me every time you close your eyes..."
  • "Taste me every time you cry."
  • "This memory will fade away and die."
  • "Just for today, breathe me and say goodbye..."
  • "How many times?!"
  • "Now I can't look you in the eye!"
  • "And I don't even want to try."
  • "Every word from you is a lie."
  • "I'm always falling on my face."
  • "I don't think that you're aware of the cost."
  • "Stupid me to believe that I could trust in stupid you!"
  • "Don't leave me here to pass through time!"
  • "I don't know where to begin."
  • "Don't leave me here."
  • "I'm sick of fighting..."
  • "The cold is biting..."
  • "My broken spirit is frozen to the core."
  • "Don't wanna be here no more."
  • "Wouldn't it be good to be in your shoes?"
  • "And wouldn't it be good if we could wish ourselves away?"
  • "You must be joking!"
  • "You don't even know a thing about it!"
  • "You've got no problem."
  • "I'd stay right there if I were you!"
  • "The grass is always greener over there."
  • "I don't want to be alone."
  • "I'm alive, so alive."
  • "I'm in a desperate situation."
  • "Now there's a hand print on your cheek."
  • "Is it my imagination?"
  • "Let me pay you back in kind."
  • "I always watch you when you're dreaming"
  • "I always watch you when you're dreaming because I know it's not of me."
  • "I smoke a dozen cancer sticks."
  • "We run for our lives."
  • "Promise me that we will make it through."
  • "Don't worry baby - it's just the end of the world."
  • "I refuse to remain in regrets."
  • "I've existed too long in secrets."
  • "Help me start to heal."
  • "Every one of my needs will be met."
  • "I refuse to be left behind."
  • "I know you want to stop."
  • "Be glad for what you got."
  • "I recognize the smile."
  • "There are some things I cannot forget."
  • "It may be for a while, I'll pretend we've never met."
  • "And maybe we will part."
  • "Will your paranoia keep you warm?"
  • "I will still enjoy to watch you fall."
  • "Stop!"
  • "I try every day"
  • "I try every day, to think of something deep to say."
  • "If I am an extra in the film of my own life, then who the hell is the director?"
  • "Show me how to live."
  • "There's a riot in my head."
  • "Let's fight until the end of days."
  • "Let's destroy and let's devastate."
  • "I know where you live."
  • "Time is money, bastard."
  • "You are so beautiful."
  • "Love claims to have the answer."
  • "Can you imagine a love that is so proud?"
  • "We are loud like love!"
  • "If you were mine, then we would know!"
  • "And with our bodies entwined we will know paradise."
  • "My computer thinks I'm gay."
  • "I got too many friends."
  • "I'll never be there for you/them."
  • "I am a small and gentle man."
  • "Hold on to me..."
  • "My behaviour is hard to understand."
  • "But I'm still doing all I can, to try and get me some redemption."
  • "And I'm knee deep in sinking sand, crying out for your attention!"
  • "Rob the bank!"
  • "Take me home, then make love."
  • "There wasn't much I used to need..."
  • "Now my mistakes are haunting me."
  • "I've lost the power to understand what it takes to be a man."
  • "You tried your best to be a friend to my heart."
  • "I saw you wanted this to end."
  • "Please no grieving, my love, understand?"
  • "Now I feel I've lost my spark."
  • "Can't you see I'm sick of fighting?"
  • "Can't you see I've lost my way?"
  • "All my dreaming torn in pieces..."
  • "As you wake does he smother you in kisses long and true?"
  • "Want you so bad I can taste it!"
  • "If I could, I would hover while he's making love to you, make it rain as I cry."
  • "Your touch, I cannot regret!"
  • "You're so my kind."
  • "You're so my kind, erotic and devine."
  • "To me you're more than a human, you are more complex."
  • "You are like a fallen angel."
  • "Look me in the eyes, say that again."
  • "Knock me off my feet like heroin."
  • "No need to disguise or to pretend."
  • "Tonight's the night that we begin the end."
  • "I tried, God knows, I tried."
  • "There's nothing you can do to change my mind."
  • "I don't enjoy to watch you cry."
  • "Blame me for the sorry state you're in."
  • "I love you more than any man, but something's getting in the way."
  • "I do you harm because I can for the second time today."
  • "When I get drunk, you take me home and keep me safe from harm."
  • "I ask you for another second chance, but then I drink it all away."
  • "I was so delicate when we began, so tender when I spoke your name."
  • "Now I'm nothing but a partisan to my compulsion and my shame."
  • "You know, I'm grateful, I appreciate."
  • "Then I run away to wonderland, and disappear without trace."
  • "Can't you see there's a world out there?"
  • "Don't be scared."
  • "Babe I'm gonna be your man!"
  • "And it's plain to see you were meant for me."
  • "I wanna be your toy."
  • "I've been smoking too long."
  • "I wanna turn you on."
  • "I'm only a person."
  • "Open up your heart, let me slip inside."
  • "Lie to me."
  • "Drink you pretty."
  • "My mother told me, that you're never lonely when you're laughing all the time."
  • "My father told me, that you're always lonely when they're all laughing at you."
  • "He tries to impress her, mentally undress her."
  • "Theres a look on your face I would like to knock out."
  • "All I want is to see you in terrible pain."
  • "Theres no light in your eyes and your brain is too slow."
  • "Fuck you."
  • "So fuck you anyway."
  • "Makes me sick when I hear all the shit that you say."
  • "Theres a time for us all and I think yours has been, can you please hurry up cos I find you obscene?"
  • "I cant wait for the day that you're never around, when that face isn't here and you rot underground."
  • "Your eyes are almost dead."
  • "I wanna be much more like you."
  • "I wanna take a bath with you."
  • "I wanna say I do."
  • "The way your smile lights up the room."
  • "To jealousy I'll stay immune."
  • "She's a faker, always let's me down."
  • "Don't you make me frown."
  • "I never wanted the real thing."
  • "I didn't mean it."
  • "I'm the one to blame."
  • "Did too much cocaine..."
  • "One more time for me."
  • "Put your hands in the air, and wave them like you give a fuck!"
  • "The only place you’re truly free is cosy in your dreams."
  • "We need to concentrate on more then meets the eye."
  • "Patience comes to the ugly, not me."
  • "Laughter comes to the lucky, not me."
  • "Where is my mind?"
Heavenly Commentary: Deathly Hallows Pt1
  • Sirius: I can't believe he broke the mirror.
  • James: Didn't really need it, did he?
  • Sirius: Still. I liked that mirror.
  • ***
  • Lily: That's a nice little tribute.
  • Albus: Yes. Elphias always was a generous man. Although Rita Skeeters is far more thrilling.
  • James: Harry thinks otherwise.
  • Albus: He will learn the truth. That no one is without regret. Rita Skeeter was surprisingly quick.
  • Cedric: Even dead we can't get rid of her.
  • ***
  • James: I never thought I'd see Harry trying so hard to save these people. After everything they’ve done to him.
  • Lily: Our son is better than us both.
  • ***
  • James: That was downright emotional for Dudley.
  • Albus: I imagine that he is beginning to see through the veil of his youth. One’s parents are not always correct.
  • ***
  • James: The guard is all here.
  • Lily: Obviously. Oh yeah. How was Moony’s wedding?
  • Sirius: Simple. You know him. Not an extravagant bone in his body.
  • James: I'm betting Tonks got an extravagant bon-OW!
  • Lily: Shut up!
  • ***
  • Cedric: Seven Harry Potters fly out of a house. What does Voldemort do?
  • Albus: He will assume they will give the real Harry to Alastor. As he is the strongest wizard present. He is unable to understand that strength is not the factor here.
  • Sirius: I don't understand. Who is taking Harry?
  • Albus: Hagrid of course. There is no one there who loves Harry quite like Hagrid.
  • ***
  • James: Even dead you're right.
  • Albus: It appears not all habits die hard.
  • ***
  • Lily: I have a bad feeling. Nothing is ever this easy.
  • James: Oh shit. No!
  • Hedwig: Hoot hoot.
  • Cedric: Trust me. I know.
  • ***
  • James: I thought he was going to die.
  • Lily: How did Harry do that? He didn't look in any shape to defend himself.
  • Albus: I have my theories. But imagine the suspense if I choose not to share them.
  • Sirius: I never said this when we were alive but, you're a dick.
  • Alastor: I said that constantly.
  • Albus: Old friend! It's terrible to see you here. Welcome to the party.
  • Alastor: Where are we?
  • Albus: The next great adventure. Your appearance is rather disconcerting with two normal eyes.
  • ***
  • Lily: Poor George.
  • James: Everyone is going crazy. They've been betrayed.
  • Sirius: And of course Snape cursed his ear off. Part of the plan Albus?
  • Albus: Let's find out.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Grieve later fools. Fight the war now.
  • Cedric: Constant vigilance?
  • Alastor: Exactly.
  • ***
  • James: Remus says Harry is like me and yet he makes it sound like an insult.
  • Lily: Because it was. Something is broken inside of him.
  • ***
  • Sirius: They've done all this?
  • James: They're children going to war. What do you expect?
  • ***
  • Lily: That had the feeling of a kiss goodbye.
  • Alastor: Smart girl.
  • ***
  • James: Happy birthday harry.
  • Lily: He's all grown up now.
  • James: But he's still our boy.
  • ***
  • Sirius: You left them stuff?
  • Albus: But of course. A few trinkets I hope will be of use. Oh Rufus. If only you put this energy into helping me.
  • ***
  • James: The Snitch he swallowed. Damn it but that's genius.
  • Albus: Thank you.
  • Lily: “I open at the close”?
  • Albus: I have always appreciated a healthy use of theatricality.
  • ***
  • Lily: Of course Luna would recognise him. I really do adore that girl.
  • ***
  • James: Do you remember our wedding?
  • Lily: I'll never forget it.
  • James: I wish we could have had something like this. Not the rushed one we had.
  • Lily: It was perfect and I'll never think otherwise.
  • ***
  • Albus: Ah fate. It is always nice to know when one is on the right path.
  • Sirius: ...ok?
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh...Albus is this tr-
  • Alastor: Enough.
  • Cedric: But Prof-
  • Alastor: Enough! There are bigger problems right now.
  • James: The Ministry has fallen.
  • Cedric: Then it's over.
  • Albus: No Mr Diggory. Now it begins.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Excellent Miss Granger. She's prepared.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Why are they being so nice?
  • Sirius: It’s not actually mercy if they can't actually kill them.
  • ***
  • Albus: Charming, Alastor. But those would not stop Severus. Given his innocence they wouldn't need to.
  • Alastor: What?
  • Cedric: I'll fill you in.
  • Hedwig: Hoot.
  • ***
  • James: Oh man, do you remember that picture?
  • Sirius: Last day of our first year. We were children.
  • James: But not for very long
  • ***
  • Lily: I remember that letter. What happened to the rest of it?
  • James: Probably Snape. Greasy bastard.
  • Albus: ...
  • Sirius: Just because he's on a secret mission to save the world doesn't mean he can't be a bastard.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Regulus, oh God. You did...why didn't you tell me?
  • James: Like Hermione said. He was trying to protect you
  • Albus: Did you find your younger brother Mr Black?
  • Sirius: No.
  • Albus: Wherever he is, I honour him. I would never have been able to drink that potion alone.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh Remus...no.
  • James: Why would he...
  • Lily: Har- oh no.
  • Sirius: Moony...
  • James: You did good Harry. You did the right thing.
  • ***
  • James: No. No!
  • Lily: NO! FUCK THAT BITCH! NOT AGAIN!
  • James: FINISH HER! END HER LIFE!
  • ***
  • Alastor: Fools! Do they think these kids are going to school?
  • Sirius: They don't think. Wow, Kreacher looks...happy.
  • Cedric: I guess that's what happens when you're treated with common decency.
  • ***
  • Lily: Do you think they're ready?
  • Alastor: As ready as they'll ever be.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Don't ask a teenage boy what he was doing in the bathroom, Hermione. You may not like the answer.
  • Lily: I swear I will hit you.
  • ***
  • Albus: Let the games begin.
  • ***
  • Lily: Those are muggle bodies. I think I'm going to be sick.
  • ***
  • James: That's why he was so eager to get to work. His wife is on trial.
  • Lily: It’s not a trial. It's a sentencing.
  • ***
  • Lily: Holy shit. It's her!
  • Cedric: Why can't they just take the locket and run?
  • James: Because they don't know if she still has it. And stealth is still needed.
  • Albus: Also because that man is the Minister himself.
  • ***
  • Alastor: I think I preferred it when Crouch Jnr had it.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Mr Weasley is terrifying.
  • James: I think Harry agrees.
  • ***
  • Lily: Well so much for stealth!
  • James: Don't look at me like that! He's your son too!
  • Sirius: They might actually make it out.
  • Lily: Crap! Yaxley has them! He's seen Grimmauld Place!
  • Cedric: So where are we now?
  • ***
  • Lily: Ron must be really afraid if he's stopped saying “Voldemort”.
  • Albus: Perhaps not the most foolish of precautions.
  • ***
  • Alastor: You know why he's after Gregorovitch, don't you Albus.
  • Albus: I do. I'm curious to see if it will work.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Not a Christian but I appreciate the effort Potter.
  • ***
  • James: Ron isn't holding up too well.
  • Alastor: Some people aren't cut out for field work.
  • ***
  • Lily: The sword...?
  • Albus: Indeed.
  • James: So where is it?
  • Albus: Therein lies the question.
  • ***
  • Lily: He left...
  • James: I can't believe it. He's gone...
  • ***
  • Cedric: That's it then. He can't find them. He's really gone.
  • Albus: Perhaps.
  • ***
  • James: He doesn't care about the sword. He wants to go home.
  • Lily: Back to where it all started.
  • ***
  • James: Welcome home Lily.
  • Lily: I never thought th- they built us a statue?
  • James: Damn right they did.
  • Sirius: Where’s my statue? Bastards.
  • James: Why would they build you one idiot? You helped kill us. Remember?
  • ***
  • Cedric: I thought Dumbledore would be here to see his family’s graves. But I'm guessing he's actually with them now so never mind.
  • ***
  • Lily: He's crying...
  • James: So are we...
  • ***
  • James: Do you think they would've gone to all this trouble if Voldemort hadn’t been defeated?
  • Lily: Of course not. We'd have been just three more victims.
  • ***
  • James: Something isn't right. Bathilda was the sharpest woman I've ever met.
  • Lily: And now she looks...dead.
  • Albus: That would be because she is indeed deceased.
  • Sirius: How could you know that?
  • Albus: I just came from visiting her.
  • Cedric: Then who is that?
  • Alastor: What, not who. And that is Bait.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Holy fucking shit!
  • James: Run Harry!
  • Lily: Hermione! That was close. What's wrong with him?
  • Albus: I believe he is trapped inside the memories of Voldemort. The memories associated with the last time he stood there.
  • Lily: Oh...
  • ***
  • James: Grindelwald?!?
  • ***
  • Lily: Do you have anything to say?
  • Albus: Keep watching.
  • ***
  • James: Is that a...
  • Lily: Snape. That's his patronus.
  • Cedric: How do you know?
  • Lily: Because that's mine.
  • ***
  • Lily: Take the Horcrux off. Take the Horcrux off. Take the Horcrux off.
  • James: Dammit Harry.
  • Cedric: This can't end well.
  • ***
  • Cedric: I take that back!
  • Sirius: About damn time Ron!
  • ***
  • Lily: Family.
  • ***
  • James: This is genuinely hilarious.
  • Cedric: Hermione is a badass.
  • Lily: So cute. They're all back together.
  • ***
  • Albus: Ah boys. I wish I was there to help. But alas I am not.
  • ***
  • Alastor: More breadcrumbs Albus? If you trust Severus so much why didn't you just give him a letter to send to them?
  • Albus: Old friend, in this matter, the journey is far more important than the goal itself.
  • ***
  • James: The Deathly Hallows?
  • Lily: What are they?
  • Sirius: A children's story.
  • Albus: I think you'll find, Mr Black, that most children's stories are based on truth.
  • ***
  • Alastor: They should never have come here!
  • Cedric: They took his daughter! He had no choice.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Albus...are the Hallows real?
  • Albus: They are.
  • Sirius: How do you know? How can you be sure?
  • Albus: Because I've held them all.
  • ***
  • Lily: I really hope you haven't just split them apart again.
  • Albus: They are behaving as I expected them to.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh it’s good to hear them again.
  • Sirius: Keep the faith.
  • James: NO! Ah Harry don't use the name.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Stay calm. Stick to your story.
  • Cedric: Too late. They've been found out.
  • James: They're taking him to Voldemort.
  • Lily: I think Harry is with him already.
  • ***
  • Albus: Poor Draco. I tried to help him.
  • Sirius: No you did the bare minimum. If you really tried to help him then we wouldn't be watching this.
  • Albus: I do believe you're right. But necessity demanded.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh God. They're going to torture her.
  • ***
  • James: The mirror?
  • Sirius: What use is that going to be?
  • ***
  • Sirius: Pettigrew! You treacherous bastard!
  • James: Wait! What? No!
  • Lily: ...he's dead. What just happened.
  • Albus: Love. Mercy. Forgiveness. Things such as these can forge terribly great magic. Harry spared Pettigrews life and created a debt. Peter's hand, a construct of pure magic, just repaid it.
  • ***
  • Sirius: He's not here.
  • James: I don't think he wanted to meet the two people he betrayed and the one he blackmailed.
  • Sirius: He's gotten smarter. But I think I'll hunt him down.
  • ***
  • Albus: Oh my...
  • Lily: He's coming! You have to go!
  • James: Woah that was close! DOBBY! Excellent timing!
  • Cedric: Shell Cottage. Nice na- oh no. Don't...
  • Dobby: Master Dumbledore sir. What has happened?
  • James: Dobby. We are Harry Potters parents. We've been watching you help our son for five years. You've been so noble. So brave.
  • Lily: We want you to know, we love you so much Dobby. And you will always be with friends here.
  • Dobby: Kind Miss has Harry Potters eyes.
  • ***
  • Dobby: Such kind words from Sirs and Misses. And Harry Potter is sad.
  • Lily: Of course he is sad. He loved you more than we do. He is your friend.
  • ***
  • James: I don't understand what's going on.
  • Lily: Me neither.
  • Alastor: Then why don't you both shut up and listen to your son explain it all?
  • ***
  • Albus: Harry. You amazing young man. I'm proud of you my boy.
  • James: You had the Elder Wand? You took it from Grindelwald?
  • Albus: I did.
  • Lily: And why not give it to Harry?
  • Albus: You must pay closer attention Mrs Potter.
  • ***
  • Cedric: So we're planning again. But this time to break into Gringotts.
  • James: Should be fun. Did Godric really steal the sword?
  • Albus: It’s quite possible. No human account would ever admit to it. And who's to say the goblin history isn't biased either.
  • Lily: You were a teacher right?
  • ***
  • James: You're back. Moony has a son.
  • Sirius: Well I’ll be dammed. Good for you mate.
  • Lily: He looks so happy.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Weasley. As subtle as ever.
  • Cedric: Hermione is the only one who appreciates subtlety. The other two prefer a wand to the face.
  • ***
  • Albus: Once more unto the breach
  • ***
  • James: I recognise his voice.
  • Lily: Travers is the one who almost killed me. And then you dropped your wand and beat him half to death.
  • Sirius: Potter, your laziness is biting your son in the arse. “Half to death” finish the job!
  • ***
  • Lily: He just used the Imperius Curse...
  • James: It was necessary.
  • Alastor: Be grateful he's managed to avoid killing anyone. What was your bodycount?
  • Lily: More than zero.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Dammit! This is the ministry all over again.
  • James: Onwards. Get the Horcrux.
  • ***
  • Lily: They’ve got i- GODDAMMIT GRIPHOOK!
  • Alastor: They should have never trusted the goblin!
  • James: They had no choice! Time to go son!
  • Lily: WHY DOES HE ALWAYS INSIST ON FLYING!
  • JAMES: WHY ARE YOU HITTING ME??
  • Lily: BECAUSE IT'S YOUR FAULT!
  • ***
  • Cedric: They did it. They got the cup.
  • Sirius: Lost the sword.
  • Albus: They did well. But now Tom Riddle will know what they are hunting.
  • James: He already knows. Now what?
  • Lily: To Hogwarts.
  • Dobby: Once again Harry Potter frees a poor and hurt creature. He is truly great.
  • Albus: You are correct Dobby. He really is.
  • ***
  • James: They're in trouble!
  • Sirius: They need to-
  • Albus: Brother.
  • ***
  • Lily: Your brother isn't being helpful.
  • Albus: He's worrying more about their safety than their success. He's a better man than I ever was.
  • ***
  • James: Oh...
  • Lily: Albus...oh Albus I'm so sorry.
  • Albus: I should introduce you to my family. They would like you. But that may have to wait. I believe we are about to go home.
  • ***
  • Alastor: The war came to Hogwarts.
  • Albus: And here it will end. Never tickle a sleeping dragon.
  • ***
  • James: Use them Harry. You need the help
  • ***
  • Sirius: Why would you step out from the cloak?
  • James: He can handle Alecto.
  • Lily: So can Luna.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh good. He's used Cruciatus.
  • James: Let's just hope he doesn't need to use the last one.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Oh great. This dick.
  • James: Oh man! Look at Minnie go! Kick his ass!
  • Lily: They're on the same side!
  • Sirius: So?
  • ***
  • Sirius: I wish I was there. One last battle.
  • James: Me too Padfoot.
  • Sirius: Although...maybe not at this very moment.
  • Lily: This is so awkward. Jeez Fleur, really?
  • ***
  • Lily: Aww they made up.
  • Alastor: Just in time to die.
  • James: Death did not make you any cheerier did it?
  • ***
  • Cedric: See I’m impressed by the visual. But the fact that it’s always Slytherin versus the other three, seems to highlight a major problem in this school.
  • Albus: I agree Mr Diggory. A simple idea that has such permanent consequences.
  • ***
  • James: In the middle of a battle and he forgets what he's doing.
  • Lily: Has your attention span.
  • James: Why is it that every bad thing comes from me?
  • ***
  • Albus: The Grey Lady. Harry you marvelous young man.
  • Dobby: Ghost Miss Ravenclaw has always been kind to me.
  • Albus: Ah of course! Before he met with me. In case I escorted him out.
  • James: But where did he hide it?
  • Albus: I do not know. But I believe Harry does.
  • ***
  • Lily: Even now he is loyal to you.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Chamber of Secrets? Hell of a romantic date Ron.
  • Albus: Aaahh of course. These children are magnificent.
  • ***
  • Lily: It’s about damn time!
  • James: They're really going at it.
  • Alastor: Timing. Idiots.
  • ***
  • James: Sirius is following Tonks. Cedric and Alastor have gone to see other people.
  • Lily: I guess it's just us then.
  • Albus: Fitting in a way.
  • Dobby: Yes sir.
  • Hedwig: Hoot.
  • ***
  • Lily: These three again?
  • James: When are old school enemies not welcome?
  • ***
  • James: He just tried to kill Hermione...
  • Lily: Were we like this?
  • James: Probably.
  • ***
  • James: Fucking fiendfyre! You crazy bastard!
  • ***
  • Lily: We would never have tried to save them.
  • James: Speak for yourself. I saved Snape remember.
  • Lily: Oh shut up. They destroyed another Horcrux
  • ***
  • James: Oh no...
  • Lily: Hello Fred.
  • Fred: Blimey. You're the Potters! Professor Dumbledore! Oh hell!
  • James: Yes Fred you are dead. But if it makes you feel better, you can call me Prongs.
  • Fred: But my pare- YOU'RE JOKING!
  • Sirius: No he's not. I'm Padfoot. And this is Moony, who literally can’t duel to save his life.
  • Remus: I’d say it's good to see you Fred bu...James? Lily?
  • James: It’s good to see you old friend.
  • ***
  • Remus: It’s been years.
  • Lily: For you. Where’s Tonks?
  • Remus: Dolohov killed her after he did me. When Padfoot collected us she went to see Teddy.
  • ***
  • James: Let's go end this.
  • ***
  • Fred: This is chaos.
  • Alastor: This is war!
  • Fred: Mad Eye! You’re al- oh yeah I'm dead.
  • Sirius: You get used to it.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Dammit Hagrid!
  • Remus: Wonderful. Giants.
  • ***
  • James: Focus Harry. You can do this.
  • Lily: Luna! Bless your soul.
  • ***
  • Remus: I'm not sure how I feel about Voldemort using this place.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh God. Snape, run!
  • James: Too late.
  • Remus: What is he doing?
  • Albus: That's a memory.
  • Severus: Albus? Where are w- Lily??
  • Sirius: You sonofa-
  • James: Motherf-
  • Lily: QUIET! No one says a word until we see that memory.
  • Albus: If I may-
  • Lily: Not a word! You have both played with my sons life as if he were a piece in a game! No one has the right to talk until we see that memory!
  • ***
  • Lily: You bullied my son. And his friends. You went out of your way to torture and torment them. But you also risked your life for my son, every day for the last three years.I do not forgive you, but you can stay. For now.
  • Sirius: Wait what?
  • James: You heard her. But I swear, you pine after my wife even once and I'll punch you in the face.
  • Severus: I won't be here long. I want to see how it ends. After that, I will leave.
  • ***
  • Severus: It’s good to see you Lily.
  • Fred: He says after we just watched a montage based on sixteen years of his love for her.
  • Remus: Fred, shut up.
  • ***
  • Cedric: I thought you'd be more disturbed about Harry having to die.
  • Lily: I...
  • James: Don't think for a second that we aren’t being destroyed inside. But there is no choice. Our son has t-...
  • Lily: To defeat Voldemort, our son has to die. And we'll be here to greet him.
  • ***
  • James: He told Neville. About the snake.
  • Lily: Oh. It's Ginny.
  • ***
  • Sirius: The Snitch?
  • Albus: Excellent Harry. I imagine you four should get ready.
  • James: Ready for what?
  • ***
  • Cedric: The Stone! Harry was right!
  • Fred: What the hell is that thing?
  • Albus: Old and powerful magic.
  • ***
  • Lily: He dropped it!
  • James: Harry NO!
  • Lily: Wh-what just happened? Why did Voldemort fall?
  • Albus: EXCELLENT! HAHAHA! IT WORKED!
  • Severus: What did you do this time you mad old man?
  • Albus: My greatest work! My masterpiece! Engineered from beyond the grave!
  • Lily: Stop patting yourself on the back Dumbledore and tell me what happened to my son!!
  • Albus: Lily! James! Harry is alive! Now, let’s see if this works.
  • James: What? What are you muttering? What-WHERE DID HE GO?
  • ***(Due to Tumblr limits, the rest is under part 2)
Ellie Goulding sentence starters
  • "You're the only thing I wanna touch."
  • "What are you waiting for?"
  • "I'll let you set the pace."
  • "It's a little dirty how the whole thing started."
  • "Thought that you were cute and you could make me jealous."
  • "You wanted my heart but I just liked your tattoos."
  • "Let's join forces."
  • "I know you've been burned, but every fire is a lesson learned."
  • "You're so worth it, you are."
  • "I wish I could be it all for you."
  • "Everybody's starry-eyed."
  • "Who are we to play with hearts and throw away it all?"
  • "I don't like the way I never listen to myself."
  • "I feel like I'm on fire, I'm too shy to cry for help."
  • "I don't think you know me much at all."
  • "This love will be your downfall."
  • "Who am I to choose the boy that everyone adores?"
  • "You set your sights on him."
  • "I've seen you in a fight; you lost."
  • "We're in a mess, babe."
  • "I'd rather pretend I'll still be there at the end."
  • "I don't ask for much."
  • "Maybe we forgot all the things we are together."
  • "I really thought that we'd go further."
  • "I'm tired of trying to keep you."
  • "You won't see me again."
  • "I wish I stayed."
  • "It's a shame you don't know what you're running from."
  • "You know this is your biggest mistake."
  • "Reassure me that you'll wait for me as long as it takes."
  • "You are the risk I'll always take."
  • "Tell me that we're still too young and I'll hold my tongue."
  • "That is no way to love."
  • "You're as bright as the sun and as calm as the moon."
  • "I don't know when you'll break, but it's gonna be soon."
  • "I won't tell the truth unless you want me to."
  • "I am so scared of what will kill me in the end."
  • "I hope I will get the chance to be someone."
  • "I'm trying not to lose my faith in you."
  • "I used to hear it all so loud, the sound of my heart breaking."
  • "I can take anything."
  • "This will always be my home."
  • "We are seventeen, we have just begun."
  • "I want to fall in love with you again."
  • "You can't make it right when it's wrong."
  • "Don't let it slip through your fingertips."
  • "We've only ever touched when there's no one else around."
  • "I'm not being intrusive, I just wish I knew the truth."
  • "I think about you more than I think one should."
  • "I'm making up for lost time."
  • "Trying to impress you, but lord I don't know how."
  • "I'm more alive I've ever been."
  • "I've chosen you."
  • "That feeling that doesn't go away just did."
  • "Anything could happen."
  • "After the war we said we'd fight together."
  • "I'll give you everything you need."
  • "I don't think I need you."
  • "I know you better than I ever have before."
  • "I know you're a fighter, but you never fought for me."
  • "We could be closer."
  • "You show me what it feels like to be lonely."
  • "It's gonna be better."
  • "Still not too old to die young."
  • "Lovers hold on to everything, and lovers hold on to anything."
  • "I need you more than I can take."
  • "You promise forever and a day, and then you take it all away."
  • "I've figured out that joy is not in your arms."
  • "I know I'll always ache with an empty heart."
  • "Tell me if you feel this pain."
  • "I just can't keep hanging on to you and me."
  • "I barely even know this fucking woman in my bed."
  • "You trembled like you'd seen a ghost."
  • "I lacked the things you need the most."
  • "I've loved and I've lost."
  • "It's okay to be afraid."
  • "It will never be the same."
  • "The rules you set are still untold to me."
  • "I've lost my faith in everything."
  • "I know you better than you think."
  • "You were like home to me."
  • "Please don't close your eyes, don't know where to look without them."
  • "I know you care, I know it has always been there."
  • "There's trouble ahead, I can feel it."
  • "You are just saving yourself when you hide it."
  • "It wasn't always wrong."
  • "Now I don't warm my hands in your coat, but I still hope."
  • "This is how things ought to have been."
  • "Why can't I dream?"
  • "I know you care, I see it in the way you stare."
  • "There was trouble ahead and you knew it."
  • "I'll be saving myself from the ruin."
  • "This is new."
  • "I've never met anyone like you."
  • "I'll wait for you... maybe."
  • "I know I'm fooled, I can't help it."
  • "You make my heart so helpless."
  • "Where did you go?"
  • "I need to be free with you tonight."
  • "I know you're there but I can't see you anymore."
  • "I've been a stranger ever since we fell apart."
  • "I know I’ve sinned."
  • "Sooner or later, I'll be on my own."
  • "I think I've been waiting for this all my life."
  • "I’m living on the wild side."
  • "It feels like we’re dreaming."
  • "We’ll be this way forever."
  • "I wanna hold you close, I just never wanna hold you tight."
  • "You are my only hope."
  • "I know you don't feel the same."
  • "You're sensible but it doesn't make sense."
  • "You know I'm gonna try much harder."
  • "Have you lost the same things I have lost?"
  • "I wish time was still, we'd stay right here with time to kill."
  • "You left everything behind except yourself."
  • "All I see is question marks and nothing else."
  • "You must have landed in New York by now."
  • "Please don't bring this love down."
  • "I'll never forget that feeling when I watched you disappear, when you made me stop believing."
  • "Do you remember boy when you were so cruel? When you played the thief and I played the fool."
  • "You think I’m still broken-hearted, but you will never win the war you started."
  • "How long will I be with you?"
  • "Everything I touch turns to gold."
  • "Baby, let me touch your body and your soul."
a hella long list of random lyric sentence starters (pt. 11)
  • "We were close, never close enough."
  • "I'll come around if you ever want to be in love."
  • "You always had something effortless."
  • "At school you were the biggest deal."
  • "We were young, we were side by side, don't know when we started losing touch."
  • "I know our filthy hands can wash one another’s."
  • "There are roads left in both of our shoes."
  • "If the silence takes you then I hope it takes me, too."
  • "Brown eyes I hold you near."
  • "You’re the only song I want to hear."
  • "I've tried before to tell her of the feelings I have for her in my heart."
  • "Every little thing she does is magic."
  • "Must I always be alone?"
  • "I’m drunk off your kiss."
  • "This is becoming too routine for me."
  • "I did not mean to lead you on."
  • "It's all right to pretend that we still talk."
  • "It’s just for show, isn’t it?""It’s my fault that it fell apart."
  • "You were everything I wanted but I just can't finish what I've started."
  • "I still pick my friends over you."
  • "We're making our own history."
  • "This is the moment where it all began."
  • "Every single hero has to start out looking like me and you."
  • "We can do this if we really want to."
  • "Why mess up a good thing, baby?"
  • "It’s a risk to even fall in love."
  • "This is trouble."
  • "I don’t go out much like I used to."
  • "Why leave when I got you, baby?"
  • "It’s a risk but babe, I need the thrill."
  • "I never said you'd be easy."
  • "It could be lethal, sleeping with a friend."
  • "No heroes, villains, one to blame."
  • "The thrill is gone."
  • "We used to have it all."
  • "It's our time to go, but at least we stole the show."
  • "I'm not calling you a liar, just don't lie to me."
  • "I'm not calling you a ghost, just stop haunting me."
  • "I love you so much, I'm gonna let you kill me."
  • "When you kiss me, I am happy enough to die."
  • "Classy girls don't kiss in bars, you fool."
  • "You and that girl, she your girlfriend?"
  • "Pretty girls don't know the things that I know."
  • "I love this secret language that we're speaking."
  • "Never really thought we would make it."
  • "I don't wanna see the end begin."
  • "I never felt nothing in the world like this before."
  • "You could have stayed but you wouldn't give me a chance."
  • "Why does your pride make you run and hide?"
  • "Are you that afraid of me?"
  • "I will wait for you."
  • "You're still in love with me."
  • "You don't love me at all."
  • "You're a bad-hearted boy-trap, babydoll."
  • "You're so damn hot."
  • "So who's this other guy you've got?"
  • "Once upon a time, we burned bright, now all we ever seem to do is fight."
  • "I could've been a princess, you'd be a king, but no, you let me go."
  • "You really hurt me."
  • "I'm going straight to hell."
  • "You're going down."
  • "God, it hurts so much to be the bearer of bad news."
  • "Don't just dream in your sleep, it's just lazy."
  • "I am going sleepless and you're out of lullabies."
  • "You've got a dark heart, you've got a cold kiss."
  • "You always let me down."
  • "I'm a junky for the way that you please."
  • "I almost told you that I loved you, thank God I didn't because it would've been a lie."
  • "I say the damnedest things when your on top of me."
  • "I'm not the one that you want, I'm not the one that you need."
  • "My love is like a fucking disease."
  • "I'm the hardest mother fucker to please."
  • "They say you never miss it 'til it's gone; well you're gone and I wish I'd done it better."
  • "I miss having you close to me."
  • "I'm sorry, I promise I'll do better."
  • "Can we start again?"
  • "You needed something better."
  • "I want more."
  • "I try my best, but I don't ever change."
  • "Who wouldn't want it when he looks like that?"
  • "If I try my hardest, would you look my way?"
  • "Do you want to show me something new?"
  • "I know I want it far too much."
  • "Are you coming over soon?"
  • "Can I be what you like?"
  • "Don't try to fuck with me."
  • "This is the last time I am gonna put you back together."
  • "I'm sending pic after picture, I'mma get you fired."
  • "I can't stand these nights alone."
  • "You light up my cold heart."
  • "A love like this won't last forever."
  • "I'm not the one that you want me to be."
  • "Are we just gonna stay like this forever, floating?"
  • "I know I'm gonna let you down."
  • "I wish I could say what I'm feeling; I'm scared to let these words out."
  • "I can't trust you."
  • "This isn't fun anymore."
  • "Damn, I thought we'd make it."
  • "You never got to heaven but you got real close."
  • "I beg for attention in small doses."
  • "You play those hearts like toys."
  • "I'm the option you shouldn't have chosen."
  • "This is the night you'll regret in the morning."
  • "I always wonder how far we could go."
  • "We could be free."
  • "This is my life and they'll call it a song."
  • "Make myself a king."
  • "There's no one to blame but you."
  • "You need me there, ain't no leaving me behind."
  • "There ain't nothing here for me anymore, but I don't wanna be alone."
  • "I can be a lone wolf with ya."
  • "All the world is gray as though you took the colors with you."
  • "We don't talk anymore like we used to do."
  • "What was all of it for?"
  • "I just heard you found the one you been looking for."
  • "Shoulda known your love was a game."
  • "I just hope you're lying next to somebody who knows how to love you like me."
  • "Call your girlfriend, it's time you had the talk."
  • "Say it's not her fault, but you just met somebody new."
  • "Let her down easy."
  • "You never meant to hurt no one."
  • "I give you something that you never even knew you missed."
  • "Don't you even try and explain how it's so different when we kiss."
  • "Now it's gonna be me and you."
  • "You're not sure that you love me."
  • "Don't worry 'bout this heart of mine."
  • "You're gonna break my heart anyway."
  • "Get it over with and just let me move on."
  • "Don't concern yourself with this mess you've left for me."
  • "You not making up your mind is killing me and wasting time."
  • "I'm sorry, I'm really a mess right now."
  • "I'm trying my best to get it together somehow."
  • "Tell me where love goes when it's gone."
  • "Suddenly someone is no one."
  • "I'm sorry, I let me fall for you."
  • "You're the hand I can't hold."
  • "I don't want you back, I just want to have what you took from me."
  • "I'll come around again, I know it's not the end."
  • "Love leaves a black hole where it dies."
  • "How can I ever love again?"
  • "I see you with her and it crushes me inside."
  • "Guess I should stop thinking about you all the time."
  • "Maybe this is a sign."
  • "Maybe I've been blind to reality."
  • "You seemed so interested."
  • "Was it real or was it all in my head?"
  • "She's so pretty, you two look so great."
  • "It was probably just a silly crush anyway."
  • "I just can't help but think that we could've had something."
  • "Did you ever feel the same?"
  • "I promised I wouldn't do it again."
  • "Taught him a lesson he wouldn't forget."
  • "I hope you find a way to be yourself someday."
  • "Change can be amazing."
  • "I pray for the best for you."
  • "I wish you could be honest with me."
  • "Why’d you fake it?"
  • "Hesitation is killing me, too."
  • "I couldn’t save it."
  • "Friend, why don’t you love me?"
  • "Tell me you want me in your life."
  • "It helps that you feel the same."
  • "We started from a spark."
  • "We got dreams and they start right here."
  • "I cry like a baby when I don't get my way."
  • "I won't apologize when I make a mistake."
  • "Do you want me?"
  • "I got scars on my heart and they won't go away."
  • "Everybody knows I'm a little insane."
  • "I feel you don't even know I'm alive."
  • "I feel you think that I'm out of my mind."
  • "I just want someone to hold."
  • "You're looking at me strange like you want me to change."
  • "I think you're a saint and I think you're an angel."
  • "You give me something to think about that's not the shit in my head."
  • "You're a miracle."
  • "I gotta stay with you."
  • "You're a glimpse of bliss, a little taste of heaven."
  • "I know you're gone now, but I still wait for you."
Random lyrics sentence starters
  • "They make it easy."
  • "You give in to everything."
  • "There's no need to disappear. i've got room for you in here."
  • "I've been longing after you since the start."
  • "All you have to do is stop by."
  • "So shut the bedroom door and shut out the world some more."
  • "Take it easy."
  • "I'm building an empire."
  • "So little time and so much to do."
  • "This is as good as it gets."
  • "Why are you wasting your blood, your sweat, your tears?"
  • "I'm never gonna look back."
  • "Think twice, you might not like it."
  • "Only I know the ugly."
  • "I paint pretty on my face."
  • "I'll fight, I scream, I'll misbehave."
  • "Got secrets you won't see on stage."
  • "All we do is drive."
  • "All we do is think about the feelings that we hide."
  • "All we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign."
  • "Sick and full of pride."
  • "California never felt like home to me."
  • "His laugh echoes down the hallway."
  • "It's so simple, but we can't stay."
  • "Over analyze again."
  • "Would it really kill you if we kissed?"
  • "It's so funny to be seeing you after so long, girl."
  • "I understand that you are not impressed."
  • "I heard you let that little friend of mine take off your party dress."
  • "I'm not going to get too sentimental."
  • "I don't know if you've been loving somebody, I only know it isn't mine."
  • "I know this world is killing you."
  • "My aim is true."
  • "Sometimes I wish that I could stop you from talking when I hear the silly things that you say."
  • "I can't stand to see you this way."
  • "There’s nothing you can do."
  • "Boy, she’s taking over you."
  • "Let’s misbehave."
  • "You should've been there."
  • "I would've been so happy."
  • "That was the moment I knew."
  • "I just wanna be alone."
  • "Your close friends always seem to know When there's something really wrong."
  • "He said he'd be here."
  • "What do you say when tears are streaming down your face In front of everyone you know?"
  • "What do you do when the one who means the most to you Is the one who didn't show"
  • "I'm sorry I didn't make it."
  • "I don't mind where you come from as long as you come to me."
  • "You've shown me eventually what you'll do."
  • "I don't mind, I don't care, as long as you're here."
  • "Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again. You'll just come back running."
  • "And I'll take you for who you are if you take me for everything."
  • "I have the skill, yeah I have the will, to breath you in while I can."
  • "Does your heart ache when you get around me?"
  • "Does your heart break when you think about me?"
  • "I did what they thought would be good for me."
  • "Now you wanna cry call me a cheater, left you to die, though I did neither."
  • "Do your worst."
  • "I couldn't be your friend, even if I tried again."
  • "You had me all wrong."
  • "It's never enough to say I'm sorry."
  • "No matter what I do, you're always mad."
  • "I can't give you what you want and it's killing me."
  • "I'm starting to see maybe we're not meant to be."
  • "There's no way out for you and me."
  • "How I wish that we could meet again."
  • "Don't you break my heart again."
  • "I still believe that change can happen, though it's hard and it happens slowly."
  • "I still believe forgiveness comes with love."
  • "We all have our secrets."
  • "I'll never catch up with you."
  • "Shit gets dark when you lose it all."
  • "You were like home to me."
  • "Please don't close your eyes. Don't know where to look without them."
  • "I know you care."
  • "There's trouble ahead, I can feel it."
  • "You are just saving yourself when you hide it."
  • "I know you care. I see it in the way you stare."
  • "I'll be saving myself from the ruin."
  • "It wasn't always wrong."
  • "Now I don't warm my hands in your coat, but I still hope."
  • "Why can't I dream?"
  • "I can't say that I'm sorry for loving you and hating myself."
  • "It's killing me to walk away."
  • "How come you don't want me now?"
  • "How come you always lead me on?"
  • "Why don't you want to show me off?"
  • "Tell me why you couldn't try and keep me here."
  • "I see you by my house walking with a different girl."
  • "Someday soon, I won't be the one who waits for you."
  • "Have you lost the same things I have lost?"
  • "Do you know that panic I know?"
  • "I wish time was still. We'd stay right here with time to kill."
  • "You left everything behind except yourself."
  • "All I see is question marks and nothing else."
  • "You must have landed in New York by now."
  • "Please don't bring this love down."
  • "You told me you loved me, so why did you go away?"
  • "I don't know how to be something you miss."
  • "I never thought we'd have a last kiss. Never imagined we'd end like this."
  • "You're showing off again."
  • "I'm not much for dancing."
  • "How you kissed me when I was in the middle of saying something... There's not a day I don't miss those rude interruptions."
  • "I feel you forget me like I used to feel you breathe."
  • "I keep up with our old friends just to ask them how you are."
  • "I hope something reminds you wish you had stayed."
  • "I never planned on you changing your mind."
  • "What did you expect from me?"
  • "I know how it's going to end."
  • "I kept my word when I swore that I would let you down."
  • "You knew all along."
  • "Try to forget me and just move on."
  • "Oh, my dear, what have I gone and done now?"
  • "I ruined the evening again."
  • "I don't have love left inside."
  • "Are you desperate for an answer?"
  • "I don't have an ounce of good left in me now, that's why I walked out."
  • "I am not the one that you should blame."
  • "Do your best to forget my name."
  • "Can you place yourself in a moment's notice, in my situation?"
  • "You've made me cold and afraid."
  • "If you gave me a chance to love you, could I come back and love you?"
  • "I gave you everything, but I couldn't give enough."
  • "You threw stones at me and said that they were thrown in love."
  • "Turns out that I don't really love you at all, 'cause love would find forgiveness."
  • "Nothing's good, nothing's right, but I love you."
  • "Turns out that I don't really love you at all."
  • "Love would find forgiveness."
  • "I felt you in my legs before I even met you."
  • "I feel you in my heart, and I don't even know you."
  • "You were all I had."
  • "I was yours, right?"
  • "The crowds in stands went wild."
  • "One day, we will be remembered."
  • "For a moment a band of thieves in ripped up jeans got to rule the world."
  • "I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you."
  • "If you have children some day, when they point to the pictures, please tell them my name."
  • "I've never been so ashamed."
  • "It really felt like you and me were getting better."
  • "I hope that you still want me."
  • "Don't walk away and leave me without a reason."
  • "There's too much to say that hasn't been said."
  • "I know I was wrong and I'm sorry for making the same mistakes."
  • "I know I make it hard."
  • "I know you want to want me."
  • "Wish I could take it back, but you know I can't."
  • "I hope one day you understand."
  • "This can't be the end."
  • "This is the end."
  • "Don't walk away."
PROTECTIVE TAYLOR IMAGINE REQUEST FOR ANON


I sighed, i never realised coming to magcon would have been this boring although then again i had only been here a few hours and a lot of the boys were sleeping still even though it was like 3 o clock. Mahogany had gone out an hour ago with jacob to explore and i didnt want to be in the way which left me sitting in the hotel room roasting from the heat of San Diego, my boredom was soon brought to an end by loud knocks on my door, confused i got up to open the door revealing taylor, carter, matthew, cam, nash and the jacks outside my door grinning at me. ‘Come on lazy we’re going out!’ Matt said to me as they all barged on into my room plopping down wherever they felt like. 'me lazy?! you guys have only just got up!’ i laughed gesturing to their messy hair and creased tshirts. 'Get ready cmon! we’ll meet you in the lobby in 10’ taylor said. i nodded quickly running to my suitcase to find some clothes allowing them to let themselves out.
I put on my denim levi shorts a white cropped tshirt and my navy vans, quickly ran my fingers through my hair and touched up my makeup. When i met the boys in the lobby Taylor slid his arm around my shoulders giving me a hug and ruffling up my hair, i gave him a look and pushed him away from me. I’d had a little thing for Taylor since we’d first met we always got on really well and joked around together but it was nothing too serious all the boys were like that not just with me but with eachother so i just brushed it off as being friendly. The only thing about taylor, it was so hard for me to take him seriously, he turned everything into a joke which made him fun to be around but difficult to talk to about more serious things, my thoughts were interupted by the boys running past me shouting 'come on y/n, RACE’ Jack G said with Jack J on his back, Carter on Matt’s and Nash on Camerons, i looked at Taylor and he winked at me crouching down so i could jump on his back and we joined in the race all the way to Taco Bell.
*after food*
It was dark by the time we got out we were all laughing and joking around feeling much better now. I had such a buzz, being around these boys made me feel so happy (especially taylor) but all of them just knew how to make me happy just by being there, i felt glowing. 'Y/N!’ i heard someone shout from behind i spun round instantly recognising that sound, it pierced through my ears and my world came crashing down as a i realised who it was. The boys in front of me carried on with their conversations as i reluctantly walked towards the snake that had called me.
'hi jake’ i said sounding uninterested. Nothing worse than seeing your ex out right? But this wasnt just an ex this was Jake, the boy that id only recently stopped having nightmares about. He pulled me in for an uncomfortable hug squeezing me too tightly. 'ive missed you y/n, its been a while since we last spoke, we should definitely meet again soon’ he said looking me up and down, i shifted uncomfortably, 'i dont think thats such a good idea do you?’ i said trying desperately hard to keep my voice from cracking. Jake grabbed at my hand pulling me closer to him and trying to kiss me, i pulled my head away but he continued to try and kiss me on my cheek and neck, 'stop it jake! get OFF me!’ i said trying hard to get escape 'no y/n i decided i want you back now, come on i know you want me’ he said eurgh i hated him, a passionate hate but he also scared the hell out of me, he was so strong and forceful it was impossible for me to get away from him, i looked over desperatley towards the boys who had seen a couple of fans and were talking to them about 5 metres away from me but they didnt notice. Jake followed my eyes and spotted the boys his grip loosened slightly and then suddenly became even more tight, his nails digging into my arm 'oh so youve got new boys now?! he said his face right up close to mine, his voice was venomous now, he was angry. 'You always were a slut y/n, so have you fucked all of them yet?’ i was fighting with everything i had not to cry knowing it would make everything worse. Before i could reply i felt his hands tear off my skin and i saw Taylor push jake off of me, 'WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING DUDE?!’ he shouted getting right up into Jakes face. 'and who the fuck are you?!’ jake spat back, 'im y'n’s boyfriend so i think its time you left!’ taylor said back through gritted teeth, i could see the anger building up inside him his fists clenched tight. 'hahaha or what? you gonna hit me? go on then hit me’ jake laughed back, Taylor brought back his fist but was quickly caught by Cam, 'dude no dont its not worth it, not here cmon tay lets just get y/n home’ by this point the rest of the boys had noticed what was going on and had come over to back up taylor they were standing in a line infront of me like a wall protecting me. Taylor relaxed and we all turned to walk away but just as we did i heard jake say 'you guys can her shes a dirty tramp’ and before i could even proccess what was going on taylor ran up and punched jake right in the face causing him to to fall back with blood pouring from his nose, 'dont you EVER talk to her like that again OKAY?!’ he shouted as he walking towards us taking my hand as we walked back towards the hotel.
*walking back into the hotel*
Id finally stopped shaking, i was so grateful to all of the boys for being there to protect me, especially taylor obviuously. 'Thank you so much for that guys, hes a dick’ i said smiling at them 'its no problem y/n, we werent gonna let him hurt you, we’re your friends we’ve got your back no matter what’ matt said smiling at me, all the other boys agreed, 'i mean look at us, no one wants to mess with us’ nash said flexing his arm up. We all laughed except taylor who’d stayed quiet the whole time home. He’d stayed holding my hand all the way and i could feel his whole body was still tense with anger, all the boys went off seperately to their bedrooms, 'ill walk you to your room’ he said, i nodded.
'Thank you for tonight taylor i seriously dont know what id have done without you there’ i said after a short silence. 'its okay y/n i wasnt gonna let him talk to you and touch you like that, i wish id noticed sooner, he couldve really hurt you’ he replied. We’d reached my door by this point, 'its okay, it wouldnt be the first time, i just never thought id ever have to run into him again but just my luck eh?’ i said. Taylor inhaled fiercely, his body tensing up again, 'tay calm down im okay now its fine!’ i said squeezing his hand. 'i just, i cant believe someone would do that to you, he cant do that its disgusting how could he treat you like that?! you deserve so much better and i just wish i couldve always been there for to protect you’ he replied raising his voice, his face going red with anger, it was a different kind of anger to Jake’s though, it was a caring anger not a scary one. I wanted to comfort him and calm him down, i took his face in my hands and kissed him softly on the lips, 'its okay taylor, im fine now’ i said. He looked confused and hesitant to kiss me again, 'cmon tay, like you said youre my boyfriend now anyway right?’ i said smiling at him knocking our foreheads together playfully. 'You wish’ he replied smirking as i leaned in to kiss him again.

A/N - sorry it took a while and i also apologise for my bad grammar and spelling mistakes or whatever but i hope you like it!