I will worship the shit out of you

Another character that kind of has a fucked up premise

banrions:

youngbadmanbrown:

is Wonder Woman.

Imagine you’re raised in this utopian, women only warrior society (this part isn’t fucked up) and you’re taught all about how outside of your society which is magically shielded by super-science/magic

there lies “man’s world.”

Man’s world is just horrible and fucked and violent place you hear stories about and the people who inhabit it and you reach a point growing up where you probably think “okay mom, it’s probably not that bad. Shit I bet men don’t even really exist you’re just fucking with me.”

And then a fucking man shows up on your island. He’s not at all like the ones that you’ve heard about. He’s not some violent monster who wants to ruin everything he touches. He’s a good dude. You decide you want to go see man’s world, you fight for the right to become your peoples champion and ambassador. It’s your job to share with man’s world the wonders of Amazonian society.

You get to man’s world and it’s fucking astounding. There are crazy tall buildings and cars and ice cream and all these different cultures and music and it’s just fucking mind blowing.

And there are lots of men. They’re walking down the street side by side with women. They aren’t murdering them, they aren’t reducing things to cinders. Obviously all the stories your mother told you were horse shit.

But then you start to pull back the curtain. You hear and see men disrespect women on the street. You go to the mall and wonder why all the mannequins are the same size if all the women clearly aren’t. You see all these magazines telling women what’s wrong with them, what they have to do to please men. That’s when you start wondering what’s up with this world.

You find out women are paid less then men, that no woman has ever been the leader of the United States, you see crime statistics, and you find out that this Steve Trevor, who you really thought was a good person, is an agent of a government that has declared the assaults on female soldiers “occupational hazards.”

Then you realize it’s not just the United States, it’s all over “man’s world.”

It hits you that this place is even worse than all the stories you heard.

And the worst part about it is: the gods that you’ve been raised to worship and fear, the gods that you know fucking exist, don’t want to do shit about it.

Imagine what that would do to you?

I wanna read about that Wonder Woman, the Year One Wonder Woman who’s like jesus in the temple flipping shit over. I wanna read about the Wonder Woman who’s so appalled by the conditions of man’s world she marches into the UN and tells everyone off. The Wonder Woman who meets a crying girl on a street corner, finds out that her boyfriend just laid hands on her and then goes and cuts off his hands.

Writers too often fall back on all that mythology shit as if Medusa and hydras and gorgons are the worst monsters that Diana can fight.

The monsters Wonder Woman should be fighting are the ones her mother told her about as a kid

#no wonder Hollywood is so afraid to make a WW movie #she would call out all their shit with her lasso of truth and truth is a sharper weapon than a sword (dealanexmachina)

My advice for baby witches!

Here is a ton of stuff I wish someone told me 7 years ago.

  • You do not have to be Wiccan.
  • You do not have to worship any deity.
  • You do not have to believe everything you read on the internet.
  • Witchcraft cannot bend the laws of physics or the material world.
  • Witchcraft cannot give you the ability to fly, change your eye color, change your species, etc.
  • There are many “fluffy” websites out there full of misinformation like the above point.
  • You do not need to have a fancy journal where you write your shit down.
  • You can do that with a computer or in a cheap notebook. But if you want to go all out, go ahead!
  • Witchcraft does not do all the work for you. If you cast a spell to get an A on a test, you best study too.
  • Do not let others shame you from doing what works for you.
  • This includes cursing. Please don’t shame others if they want to curse!
  • If you want to do dream work or astral work, start keeping a dream journal now. 
  • You do not have to spend an arm and a leg for spell ingredients. 
  • If you’re closeted, paper magic and energy magic are your friends.
  • If you’re going to curse, ground and cleanse before AND after.
  • Understand that every spirit/entity you meet might not be your friend and you may have to get rid of it.
  • Understand that learning anything takes time, be it spirit communication or tarot.
  • Do not give up on yourself.
  • It’s okay to take a break from the craft. I do that every so often.
  • You can be christian/any religion AND a witch.
  • Witchcraft is not a religion. Wicca is.
  • You don’t need to be religious if you don’t want to.


Feel free to add anything else and my askbox is always open if you have questions!

BTS Reaction To: “Cumming” Inside Of You.

-Request: BTS reaction to them cumming inside of you for the first time?-

Thanks for requesting!


JIN.

Jin kissed you slowly, pushing himself inside of your tight walls. He wanted to fuck you slowly, knowing that soon you would be begging for him to go faster. He loved hearing you beg - the sinful sentences that would leave your dirty mouth only turned him on even further. 

You clenched yourself around Jin on purpose to edge him on to his release. He let out a groan, not knowing how much longer he could last for. Not being able to hold back, he gripped onto your hips, fucking you roughly right into his mattress. He came, forgetting to pull out of you, feeling too lost in the feeling of you around him. He collapsed next to you, realising that he had released inside of you.

“I’m sorry, baby, you just felt so warm and tight.”

You laughed, “Don’t worry, I’m on the pill anyway.”

Originally posted by closertohyoyeon

SUGA.

Yoongi lowered his body into yours, pushing his length in between your wet folds. He let out a grunt at the feeling, letting himself stay still inside of you for a little while, knowing that if he would have moved himself, he probably would have came already. It wasn’t yours and Yoongi’s first time, however he could never get used to how tight you were for him. He carefully pulled himself out from you, only to slam himself into you once again. You cried out Yoongi’s name, arching your back as each thrust became harder. Your hands gripped onto the white sheets beneath you as Yoongi planted love bites on your collar bones.

“Where do you want me to cum, Kitten?” Yoongi asked.

Without hesitation, you replied with a whiny voice, “Please, Yoongi.. Cum inside of me.”

Yoongi smirked down at you devilishly, slamming his hips into yours with more force. His hips stuttered, and he came inside of you, just liked you had begged him to.

“You’re so pretty underneath me like this, Kitten.”

Originally posted by bangtanbighit

RAP MONSTER.

Your thighs were rested against Namjoon’s hips as he had you pinned to the wall. Namjoon held your gaze, watching your desperate eyes as you waited for his member to fill you up. He teased you at first, letting the tip of his cock lightly touch your entrance. You whined. 

Namjoon filled you with his length, slowly, but made sure his next thrust was more harder and powerful, and soon enough, he had you screaming his name. Namjoon rested his forehead against yours as he fucked you against the wall, loud grunts leaving his mouth. 

It was not long later until you had came around his cock, knowing Namjoon would soon reach his high, too. “C-Cum inside me.” You told him.

Namjoon did not try to protest, bucking his hips into you more harder, driving you into overstimulation. You let out a cry at the feeling.

Namjoon came inside of you, leaving himself there to make sure you had taken all of his cum. His chest rose up and down as he tried regaining his breath.

“Do you like me filling you up with my cum, like the pretty little whore you are?”

Originally posted by arkysal

J HOPE.

Hoseok drank in the sight of you, observing every detail on your skin as he pushed himself inside of you. You let out a soft moan as he filled you inch by inch. Hoseok pressed his lips onto the exposed skin on your neck, leaving you a breathless mess due to how sensitive your neck was. Hoseok held onto your hips tightly as he continued to thrust into you, allowing him to bury himself deeper inside of your cunt. 

Hoseok made sure you had came first before allowing himself to orgasm as he cared about your pleasure only, and he could only get off if you had, too. Once you came, Hoseok titled his head back and let his mouth fall agape.

F-fuck, I’m going to cum.”

Hoseok knew he had to pull out soon, but the feeling of you wrapped tightly around him made it a challenge for him to do so.

“Cum inside me, Hoseok - please.” 

Hoseok didn’t have time to think about what the consequences of his actions would be, snapping his hips into you harder. Once he released himself inside of you, you told him you were on the pill, before he freaked out that he could have potentially got you pregnant. With a sigh of relief, he collapsed by the side of you, holding you in his embrace. 

“Can we do that more often, Princess?”

Originally posted by kthish

V.

Taehyung had missed the way you felt around him, and he had almost forgotten how tight you always were for him, due to him being on tour for a couple of months. Once he slipped himself between your soaking wet folds, he felt at ease once again, and all the stress that had come with tour had been a weight that had been taken off his shoulders. He wanted to take his time with you, worship your body, tell you how much he missed you, but you felt too good around him, and he couldn’t help himself but thrust himself in and out of you as fast as he possibly could, chasing his own orgasm. 

“I’ve missed your pretty, tight cunt.” Taehyung spoke deeply into your ear. “Are you gonna cum for me, Princess? Cum for Daddy.”

You cried out, releasing over Taehyung’s cock. Taehyung couldn’t help it, releasing himself inside of you as he watched your face unfold with pleasure. 

Shit, Princess - you felt so good for Daddy.. I couldn’t help myself but you’re on the pill, right?”

Originally posted by jimin-bts-trashs

JIMIN.

Lining himself up with your entrance, Jimin eased his length into you. It had been a while since Jimin had last fucked you, as you were being bratty, and Jimin loved denying you of sex as a punishment, watching the despiration within your eyes as you would continuously beg him to take care of your needs.

You whined at his slow pace, which only caused Jimin to grin at you. 

“Tell me how much you want me to fuck you into this mattress. Tell me how much you’ve missed my cock.”

You found yourself climaxing earlier than you usually would once Jimin had finally pounded himself into you, leaving you a complete moaning mess - the only words you could say were Jimin’s name.

Without any sort of warning or sign, Jimin had released himself inside of you. Once he registered what he did, his dominant act suddenly went away, and he found himself becoming a flustered mess. 

“Oh my- shit, I-I think I just..”

Originally posted by bangtanbighit

JUNGKOOK.

Wanting to tease you, Jungkook only entered the tip of his cock into you, knowing you would become a whiny mess beneath him. He loved watching you squirm and beg for his cock, finding the sight of it completely arousing. After hearing your begs for him, Jungkook pushed himself inside of you. He gave you no time to adjust to his length, thrusting himself in and out of you as he gripped onto your hips. Your legs were trembling - each thrust and movement of Jungkook’s hips was bringing you closer and closer to your climax. 

“Hm, are you going to cum around Daddy’s cock for me, Princess?”

It wasn’t long before you came, crying out Jungkook’s name. With no hesitation, you begged for Jungkook to fill you up with his cum, causing only a cocky smirk to appear on Jungkook’s face.

Jungkook grunted into you ear, soon releasing himself inside of you. He laid himself beside you, planting a kiss on your forehead. 

“How was that, Kitten?”

Originally posted by gldenrose

Oh, The Puns!

(Context: our party has just accidentally uprooted a massive tree, killing the cultists worshipping it inside. We’re all 300ft in the air, trying to figure out how to get down. Our rogue has a tendency to flip words around on accident)

DM: Ok, what are you gonna do?

*everyone scrambles to make puns*

Rogue (ooc): *laughing* let’s make like a tree and leaf!

Undead Fighter (ooc): aw dammit that’s better than my pun

Rogue (ooc): what was it?

Undead Fighter (ooc): “Paul Bunyan ain’t got shit on us!”

Party: *laughter*

DM: Ok, so how are you going to get out of this?

Rogue (ooc): I stand on the edge of the opening, facing the party, cast feather fall on all of us, and say “Let’s make like a leaf and tree”, and backflip out to free fall to the ground.

Rouge (ooc): …wait

sex w exo;

sehun

  • will be your fave sub ever
  • always wants to keep eye contact
  • wants you to touch him through his clothes
  • likes being put in his place sometimes
  • whines to get your attention
  • especially likes it when you ride him

Originally posted by fy-sexo-exo

jongin

  • another sub, but he’s soft and smol and cute
  • all he wants to do is please you and make you feel good
  • v into body worship (giving)
  • acts innocent when you ask him to do smth
  • likes it when you give him the chance to try and dom
  • loves it more when you touch him all over

Originally posted by intokai

tao

  • mr. i don’t need to cum yet wth…oh shit i’m cumming
  • whines to no end bc he knows you like it
  • likes to tease you in public so you’ll get back at him
  • also likes it rough tbfh
  • is a fckin hoe for you talking dirty to him, saying what you’ll do to him
  • will give you oral out like he was made to do it

Originally posted by kim-jongmin

kyungsoo

  • less vanilla than we all suspect
  • likes seeing you giving into his every word
  • will use his lips to ruin your damn life 
  • prefers being gentle with his actions though
  • swears he dies every time you moan for him
  • prolly the most cliche love maker of them all tho

Originally posted by vogueksoo

jongdae

  • will whine until you give him everything he wants
  • slightly sub, slightly dom, depends who’s asking
  • just wants attention and will get it from you
  • wants music to be playing so he can time his movements
  • anything he does will have you screaming his name tbfh
  • always asking you for more tho

Originally posted by welltakeitslow

chanyeol

  • actually really kinky like chanyeol what 
  • just loves it whenever you put your hands on him n adore him
  • esp into you riding his face 
  • pull his hair and he will moan so loud
  • likes to face you when you fuckin
  • probs will end up bein quite submissive for you in the end

Originally posted by dazzlingkai

baekhyun

  • loud, will not hold back anything sounds
  • kinda immature until you touch him on his neck
  • kisses you every where he can
  • probs has a biting kink (giving and receiving jfc)
  • slightly dom unless he’s in a bad mood
  • will want shower sex whenever he can uchqwql

Originally posted by porkdo-bi

yixing

  • a smol bean that will make sure you have only the best
  • sets up candles and roses to make things special
  • foreplay is a must and will last for years
  • will show tell you how much he loves you the whole time
  • actually likes it when you get it on in his studio tho
  • isn’t unfavourable to a bj under the table

Originally posted by wendeer

suho

  • is not a soft dom by any means
  • will make sure you follow all of his rules
  • is v passionate until you question him about it
  • not that kinky tho, likes it when he has you all to himself
  • hushes you when he’s fuckin you
  • prefers it when you cum three or four times before him

Originally posted by ethereal-baek

kris

  • one word: daddy
  • his hands are fckin massive they will hold you like no other
  • is rlly quiet but grunts when he cums
  • a gentle dom, unless you really do tease him
  • will put you on his thigh and have you ride it
  • big fan of lazy morning sex either way

Originally posted by ahintofthesea

luhan

  • likes it when you take a bit of a lead
  • but will be the one holding your hands above your head 
  • sucks on all your sensitive places 
  • holds you tighter than you would have imagined
  • has a thing for lace lingerie 
  • did someone say car sex?

Originally posted by meiren-menglu

minseok

  • prolly more dom than we expect
  • enjoys it when you beg him for more
  • is the biggest fucking tease you’ll ever meet
  • will tie your hands back but kiss your wrists after
  • puts you on his thigh to work you up
  • dirty whispers in your ear for years

Originally posted by baekintime

Behind The Towel

Pairing: Jared x Reader

Summary: You’re at your mom’s house with your kids when your husband sends you a very NSFW photo while he’s away.

Word Count: 1,116

Warnings: children (because apparently that needs a warning), a stubborn toddler, NSFW photo under the cut, embarrassment, sexting, implied smut

A/N: @wayward-girl sent me this photo and my brain just kicked into overdrive so… here ya go. This is also my (very late - I’m so, so sorry) submission for @frickfracklesackles‘s 1,000 Followers Celebration Challenge. My prompt was “I don’t know whether to worship at your feet or spank the living shit out of you.” and is bolded below.


Jared was in Los Angeles, shooting some promo shoot for something he wouldn’t tell you about. It seemed sketchy, but you shrugged it off for the most part. Packing up the kids, you headed for your mom’s house, knowing she’d listen to your worrying about there being another woman while also helping you with Jake and Lauren. 

Day two without Jared, and you were missing him. You woke up that morning and shot him a text, just saying, “Wish you were here,” with a kissing emoticon. After laying in bed for ten more minutes with no reply, you sighed and planted your feet on the floor. Trudging to the kitchen, you clutched the warm black mug between your hands, savoring every single sip of the holy liquid you were taking in.

Keep reading

Well what had happened….

We’re playing an underdark campaign; party includes barbarian (me), monk, fighter, and cleric, and we’ve been taken to a large city. We’re not welcomed of course and I’m a CN dwarf barbarian. The cleric, a drow tells me not to get into trouble. Naturally I make my way to the closest tavern.

DM: So you enter the tavern and take a seat at the bar. While you’re waiting on your drinks you hear a group of loud Duergar boasting in the corner.

Me: Do they look tough?

Monk: Don’t…

Me: DO THEY LOOK TOUGH?!

DM: yeah they’re pretty huge

Me: I go over to the table and challenge their strength!

Monk: WHY?!

Me: I’m a barbarian no one’s tougher then me!

DM: alright so you go over to their table and challenge them all to an arm wrestling contest. Roll for strength for all 3.

Me: Aw yeah! Let’s do this, rolled 16, 19, and 20.

DM: You beat them quite easily, they all howl with laughter and say. “Lugo! Get out here we’ve got a tough guy!” The largest Duergar you’ve ever seen steps through the back door, he’s so huge he shouldn’t really be considered a dwarf. “So you think you’re tough?”

Monk: See! this is why you don’t do this! You’re screwed man.

Me: I ain’t scared lets get it!

DM: Roll strength, my man I’m just saying walking a way is always an option

Me: Rolls a nat 20

DM: Whelp, You square up to arm wrestle and destroy the guy. You slam his hand on the table so hard it breaks the table. The room goes silent all the Duergar in the room just look at you.

Monk: You’re so screwed they’re going to kill us all and it’s all your fault!

DM: The Duergar start cheering and start to carry you off chanting “Bring him to the temple of Asmodeus.

After being taken to this temple they make me a champion of Asmodeus and I get covered in tattoos and become the leader of a sect of barbarian Asmodeus followers. The rest of the party meets up and they all stare at me. The cleric is the last to show up and just goes bananas.

Cleric: What did I fucking say! What did you do?!

Me: I’m huge now, and I kinda lead a pack of Asmodeus worshipers.

Cleric: I fucking hate you so much.

Me: I’m huge though.

The rest of the party just busts out in laughter, me and the cleric now butt heads on everything, it’s great this campaign is going to be hilarious.

Yano, everyone wants to glorify and worship girls with scars and cellulite and stretchmarks and I’m here for that 100% (I’ve got stretchmarks) but I never see people supporting or doing shit for girls with severe, chronic acne and acne scarring, or any severe skin condition that is incredibly obvious i.e psoriasis, eczema etc. So to all my fellow gals out there suffering from painful, noticeable skin conditions that require medicine and treatment creams and make you want to stay in bed and never show your face: we’re beautiful and we’re hardcore as fuck for living with this shit daily

WHAT AN ENTP WANTS TO SAY TO ALL OF THE TYPES.

RATIONALS (NT)

ENTJ-  You scare me. You are such and incredible leader, how do you do that?? But also I hate authority and feel a need to disagree with you at every turn because you’re so bossy. You’re not as cool as you think you are, but you’re almost as cool as you think you are and that’s pretty damn cool. Be my friend.

ENTP- Fuckin’ chill out you memelord. You’re either coasting through life or putting WAY to much effort into shit. You’re a bit of a narcissistic fuck but you’re still my favourite type (*coughs*). You’re too excitable and too much of a dick and you’re personality doesn’t make sense. Stop being mean to you’re friends. Learn to be more comfortable with emotions, it’ll be important later on in life. Be the friend that can cheer others up with jokes when they don’t really wanna talk about what’s wrong.

INTJ- You’re cool, you get shit done and you’re a bit of a supervillian. What’s not to love? You’re a rare bird. There aren’t many of you out there, but you are important. If you weren’t here, who else would the ENFP’s annoy? You’re a behind the scenes leader most of the time, pulling the strings from a safe (and smart distance) but you aren’t afraid to get you’re hands dirty. You’re good at shit.But don’t forget, you’re not superhuman. Remember other people have these pesky things called emotions, be wary of them STILL i want you to be proud of you’re inherent assholeness.

INTP-  Mad scientist. I’m constantly searching for your approval because of my unresolved daddy issues and it freaks me out. Yes, you are a daddy. Some of you have your heads shoved up a little too far in you’re own arse. Just because you’re introverted and intuitive and darn cold, does not make you better than others honey. Basically, you’re a condescending shit. But hey I still put you on this weird pedestal, so we’re both guilty. You’re the genius on tv shows that isn’t diagnosed but falls on the aspergers spectrum somewhere.

IDEALISTS (NF)

ENFJ-  Baby, I worship the ground you walk on. You are so cool, calm and controlled while still being awesome, enthusiastic and excitable. Don’t be my friend, date me. But stop trying to fix everything. Think about yourself a lil okay buddy, and use logic sometimes too. Actually scratch all that, you’re perfect, I love you.

ENFP-  You are a beautiful, annoying bastard. You’re too nice and I don’t feel comfortable making mean jokes at your expense (because you’d probably take it seriously and cry yourself to sleep), but you have effortless charm. Stop thinking about the individual and start thinking about the bigger picture, you’re not realistic. Be my friend, but not like close friend, y'know.

INFP-  Hello, the human equivalent of tumblr. Fuck. People either love you or hate you. I don’t know where I fall on that scale tbh. Sometimes you’re just a little too much honey, I’m not sensitive enough for you. Other times you are too precious for this world and I just wanna wrap you up in a blanket and protect you. I am strangely attracted to you despite how awkward you probably think you are. You have a lot of knowledge in that head of yours. Be that person I have a weird co-dependant relationship with, that really isn’t healthy but I can’t exactly live without you and I’m not sure why.

INFJ- Ah INFJ, I haven’t met many of you but BOY, are the ones I know pretentious. You’re one of the least common MBTI type, and you probably know and take pride in this. You’re good at reading people, I know, but you can just talk to me instead of analyse from a distance bud. You’re ultimately very cool and creative, a little bit of a know it all but it’s justified. You’re a sweet bundle of joy and I love you. Be my best friend. You’re good at being a friend. Really good.

GAURDIANS (SP)

ESFP-  I like you a lot kid, you remind me of a younger me. We shouldn’t get along but I love/envy you. You’re caring and you have a great childlike spirit. Make some art and ramble to me some more. I seriously appreciate you so much. You bring me back down to  the ‘now’ with you’re crazy impulsive attitude and caring demeanour. Just learn to listen to me a lil more when I tell you you’re thinking with you’re heart instead of you’re brain again. You do it a lot, buddy. Be my lover.

ESTP-  You’re cool man. You’re Ferris Bueler. You’re a salesman that’s constantly selling me on your personality. Look we get it, you’re good with one liners and you’re athletic and everyone loves you, but also hey, think about others you little sociopathic flirt. Also, sometimes people really DO know more than you, I know! Crazy. Be my Idol.

ISFP-  You probably reaallly like music. Chill out buddy, I don’t know much about you but you seem stressed and too fierce for ur adorable demeanour. I know you are your own individual beautiful creative person, you don’t need to tell me. People DO care about you, i know sometimes you doubt that, but you got this life in the bad. You’ll probably never grow out of your angsty teen years tbh but it’s okay, find yourself an ISFJ and you’ll be okay.

ISTP-  So you’re just as cool but less attainable, loner ESTP. You’re in control of your own everything but also out of control and mildly self destructive? Be the mysterious kid I rarely talk to, but everytime I do I fall in love with you a little bit.

ARTISANS (SJ)

ESFJ-  Hey there soldier. In the best case scenario, you’re cutie Monica Geller, that’s a lil anal and mildly manipulative but really! very! sweet!. In the worst case scenario you are literally my worst nightmare. Your the squad’s glue tho. Sometimes you offer a cool third perspective, but you over simplify things and don’t try to understand my crazy theories and that’s annoying. Learn to get over yourself a lil, stop playing the victim buddy and compromise. Be my friend in a few years when you learn to self reflect better.

ESTJ-  You’re a manipulative bitch. You’re so judgemental, you’re Rachel McAdams in Mean Girls. You’re pretty cool. Even more of a rampant psycho than ENTJ. I don’t like you all that much (and something tells me you don’t really care) but I respect you a LOT. Stay a safe distance away from me and please don’t judge me. You’re too savage.

ISFJ-  Hey my emo saviour. You understand everybody and nobody truly understands you. You’re the reliable Colin Firth that the world of Bridget Jones’s run to after their crazy escapades with Hugh Grant. Just remember to have standards baby, and don’t accept everyone that runs into you’re arms. You’re worth more than what most people are willing to give. Be my favourite sweet emotional little kid brother (even if you are female.)

ISTJ-  You say 'interesting’ a lot. If life were a tv show, you’d be a sassy little hate muffin that tumblr idolised that everyone would remark didnt get enough screen time. You’re all business and sometimes you should let down that gaurd fam :) Think about people a little bit more bud. I respect you. I’ll be your friend! But it will probably take three years to build up our relationship and it will probably be accidental, but im here for u anyway.

Summing up the shows

Supernatural: Two brothers start hunting the occult end up in a soap opera that never ends

The 100: Showing that teenage girls make for far better rulers then old white men

Orphan Black: A precious little hobbit finds out she has sisters in the most unusual of ways. Also French bisexual puppy

Agent Carter: is perfection. Is everything

Legend of Korra: The Anthropomorphic personification of an uber powerful god like creature is going through her teenager years and doing all the usual things. Stopping communist, starting civil wars, bringing down tyrants and falling for a girl

Arrow: Up to season 3 a fun modern super hero show with a lovely core family. From season 3 aka the post Sara Lance period utter crap that barely keeps it together

Hawaii 5-0: There should be no laws for the police. The only way to get things done is to give them absolute power and let them do whatever they want

Sense8:  What will happen if instead of internet friendships we got telepathic friendships.

Legend of the Seeker: Basically Xena although the lesbians are not just implied but shown

The Flash: Precious cinnamon roll gets superpowers ends up doing well until the end when he screws up enormously

Faking it: Ever tried to help your best friend with something only to end falling in love with her,realizing you are a lesbian and embarking on a complicated and ridiculously weird journey

Dead Like Me: bored sarcastic aimless teenager is killed by a falling space station. Becomes a grim reaper. Is still a bored sarcastic aimless teenager but slightly more angry

Person of Interest: Ok here is the plan. We pretend that this show is your usual procedural with a  slight twist and then we lay down for a while till the network doesn;t suspect anything and bham. Social issues, well developed female characters, anti goverment messages, discussing humanity and so much more

Once Upon a Time: What happens if you combines amazingly rich and iconic characters with incredibly talented and charming actors and with horrible writers

Carmilla: Tiny curious gay hobbit falls for an useless broody lesbian vampire

Community: An accurate representation of college

IZombie: A sarcastic tiny zombie solves crimes by eating the brains of murder victims and absorbing their memories and personalities. Also has shirtless Arthur. if you have loved Veronica Mars you will adore this

Leverage: Hardened criminals look at how fucked up our society is and go “ Holy shit come on’ and start fighting for the people by taking down corporations and other assholes

Lost Girl: It’s like Buffy but the main characters uses her vagina significantly more. Especially on women

Fringe: Say why not break the universe and watch as things get really weird? Also there is a cow as a supporting character

Sherlock: An anti social …sociopath  whom everybody tolerates for no obvious reason gets a grumpy doctor to obsess over him. He solves cases that are so badly written that you cringe when you say them outloud. Is a crappy show but the actors are so charming and talented that you can’t help but watch it

Orange is the New Black: Tumblr chick goes to prison remembers how much she loves girls, realizes that she is engaged to a pie fucker

Teen Wolf: ridiculously buff boys in their mid twenties play teeangers who are constantly shirtless due to being werewolves. Women tend to get screwed over a lot. Guilty pleasure for a lot of people

Rizzoli & Isles: Come for the cool female friends who solve crime together stay for your lesbian headcannon

Penny Dreadful: You know how sometimes you imagine crazy things like Frankenstein and an American Werewolf getting together and hunting down Dracula with the girl who is being stalked by Satan? Yeah…you should watch this show. It has Eva Greeen and Billie Piper

Game of Thrones: Blood and Boobs. Also ice zombie(so far we haven’t seen female ice zombie boobs but it’s just a matter of time)

Merlin: A world in which  emotional readiness of Arthur is more important then continued genocide and the destruction of a poor precious woman who only wanted the good of everybody. Yes I am still bitter

Vampire Diaries/ Originals: Here we have some incredibly toxic people and relationships. Worship them

Haven:X-Files the small town version

Happy Endings: It’s like Friends if black and gay people existed there. And if Friends had much better writers

Outlander: A woman from the 20th century travels back in time to the year 1743. Can’t stop herself from constantly telling people to fuck off

Elementary: An accomplished woman helps a broken detective gets his life together and shuts the shit out of him down when he is rude. She finds detective work fun and becomes a detective herself. Natalie Dormer appears halfway through the show and fucks you up with her perfection

Misfits: What will happen if you get superpowers

Being Human: A werwolf, a vamire and a ghost decide to become roomates. Yes it’s exactly as hilariously awesome as you think  P.S : You will end up crying a lot

Powers: The first realistic representation of what the world will be like if things like Superheroes and Super villains have existed for decades

Doctor Who: Starts out with a sad ancient alien teaching his humans companions that everyone is special and everything matters . Halfway through it suddenly changes to pointless stunts that make no sense but look pretty

The paladins false god

Context: I’m currently in two campaigns, and in my first campaign the party of five had a series of critical failures and bad luck against a single goblin, and jokingly named him the goblin god Yeemic and are going to start a cult in his name since he almost wiped out our party. I explained this story to my party members in the second campaign. The following later ensued between me, a dragonborn paladin, and my friends

Paladin: By the grace of Bahamut I will do what I can.

Bard: Please, you don’t actually worship Bahamut.

Paladin: Yes I do, I’m a freaking dragon, what else would I worship.

Bard(to the DM): I’d like to roll an insight check.

DM: I’ll allow it.

(Nat 20)

Bard: Bullshit you worship Bahamut!

Paladin: FINE, PRAISE YEEMIC MOTHERFUCKER!

DM: Well, I guess I have to allow that now…

RFA guys + Minor Duo react to MC having Superpowers

Hi anon!!! I haven’t watched Stranger Things but I looked up Eleven’s telekinesis video and also basing this from Jean Grey from X-men and Matilda :)) Also, I was halfway through this hc when @justanuser1​ ‘s request came in about MC having superpowers so I kind of just combined them, I hope you guys don’t mind! 😃

Hope you guys like it! (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

Yoosung

  • He’s rushing home because he can’t wait to see you
  • So he’s back a little earlier than you expected
  • And what does Yoosung see when he opens the door?
  • Carrots being chopped by the kitchen knife
  • Just the kitchen knife
  • He watches as the knife hovers in the air and comes down on the vegetables
  • You had your back turned and you were listening to music so you didn’t see your pale husband
  • But you heard his blood-curling scream
  • The whole neighborhood heard him ;;;
  • “Yoosungie, it’s not what you think!”
  • “MC THIS HOUSE IS HAUNTED WE ARE MOVING OUT”
  • “Yoosung—“
  • “NO. NOPE. PACK YOUR VALUABLES WE’RE MOVING OUT RIGHT NOW.”
  • “No we’re not! It was me! It’s my fault!”
  • You calm him down long enough to explain about your powers and you thought it would freak him out more
  • Nope
  • YOU ARE NOW THE COOLEST GIRLFRIEND EVER
  • This guy is such a huge geek that he immediately fanboys over you and asks you a million questions
  • “But Yoosung this has to be a secret.”
  • “Of course! I know how superheroes work.”
  • And you’re laughing because he goes from panicked to adoring in 5 seconds
  • He loves that you have powers but he still freaks out whenever he sees things hovering in your house
  • He adjusts eventually though, and now that he knows he encourages you practicing your powers at home
  • Always goes to get a physical check-up with you though, because he doesn’t want you straining yourself physically and in movies don’t people who use their powers too much end up suffering physically?
  • And Yoosung will always be careful not to brag about you too much because he doesn’t want anybody else to find out about your powers
  • He enjoys playing pranks on Saeyoung with you though
  • REVENGE!!!! ┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´)ノ︵ ┻━┻

Zen

  • Sometimes he’s not sure if he’s had too much to drink or if his girlfriend has superpowers
  • Because things are floating around in the apartment you guys shared
  • He tries to stay sober most of the time but then the floating would stop
  • But then he comes home after only having one beer with his coworkers
  • And suddenly his keys are hovering in the air in front of him?
  • He’s genuinely freaked out
  • Until he hears you giggling
  • “Jagiya, do you have telekinesis?”
  • And you’re shocked but then you confess that you do
  • He thinks you’re amazing
  • Because he had prophetic dreams ever since he could remember and now he feels like you guys are connected
  • And he’s even happier that you guys have something that’s both unique, that you have a secret only he knows of
  • He loves it when you use your abilities around the house, it’s so fascinating to him
  • He would try to research on it with you on his days off, because he also wants to find out more about your abilities and how it would affect you
  • Ehem this guy may also have to look up how to keep you from making objects fly around in moments of extreme pleasure (  ͡°  ͜ ʖ  ͡°)
  • “Babe, I’m going to rock your world.”
  • Pretty sure it’ll be the other way around, Zenny~

Jumin

  • You confess to him that you telekinesis over dinner
  • And you’re super nervous, watching his every move
  • But your husband just continues to eat his dinner, unperturbed
  • It’s like you told him something about the weather instead of saying you have supernatural abilities
  • “Honey, did you just hear what I said?”
  • He would look at you and say, “Of course I did. I find it highly interesting and I have a lot of questions but if I asked them now you wouldn’t be able to finish your meal. Is it alright if we discuss this after we’ve had our meal?”
  • Your well-being always comes first
  • So after dinner, he begins his barrage of questions
  • “Does it affect you negatively in any way? Do you feel tired after using your powers? How much weight can you lift with your abilities?”
  • And you answer him as best as you could, because there isn’t exactly a guide book for telekinesis ;;;
  • And he knows that too
  • Jumin also knows he can’t ask anybody about this because it’s too dangerous for you; he knew a lot of people would try to kidnap you and use you for their own profit
  • So you two learn about your abilities together
  • He’s so fascinated by you —everything about you
  • And he already thought you were perfect
  • But now you’re more than perfect, if that was possible
  • He makes sure nobody comes into your apartment when you’re there, not even the maid because what would happen if she accidentally saw hovering objects? ;;;
  • Also tightens security; your safety is his number one priority

Saeyoung

  • He always wondered why you had so many profile pictures in the RFA app
  • And they’re all of different women with very different features
  • You tell him it’s photos of your friends
  • ??? O-kaaaaaaay…
  • He starts researching about your “friends” and is shocked to find out they all have the same birthdays
  • And “they" all work from home
  • And “they" all listed Honey Buddha Chips as their favorite food
  • But “they” all have different names though
  • This guy already knows what’s going on, but to be sure, he calls out to you using one of your “friends” names
  • And you turn around, “Hm?”
  • Ahhh holy shit ;;;;
  • You freeze as you realize what you just did
  • And Saeyoung comes up behind you and hugs you tight from behind
  • “I know what you are…” he would whisper in your ear
  • “Say it. Out loud.”
  • “…a vampire.”
  • Lol what Saeyoung no
  • But then your hair gets shorter and you get taller and suddenly Saeyoung is hugging Edward Cullen from Twilight????
  • Miind. Blown.
  • This guy doesn’t let you go though and he only presses his lips against yours
  • “Saeyoung, aren’t you weirded out by me?”
  • ARE YOU KIDDING?
  • THIS GUY WORSHIPS YOU
  • Your ability to transform into anyone —anyone at all —is the coolest thing ever
  • Apparently you had so many identities because a few government people were looking for you and you had to be prepared, just in case one cover gets blown
  • Agent 707 on the job!
  • Hacks into the government database and makes sure all data about you is deleted, all leads wiped clean
  • He will protect you at all costs, but he also loves cosplaying with you
  • Lol if you can call actually transforming into Jumin cosplaying
  • You scare him a lot by transforming into Vanderwood and creeping up behind him
  • That is until Vanderwood walks in on you looking like him but hugging Saeyoung ;;;
  • Poor Vanderwood is scarred for life
  • Lol Saeyoung is too tbh AHAHA he hates it when you transform into Vanderwood ;;;
  • And now Saeyoung makes Vanderwood swear never to tell another living soul about your abilities ;;;

Jihyun/V

  • He has to remind himself that yes, he’s gotten the treatment for his eyes
  • Yes, he’s not seeing things
  • Yes, you’re actually floating in the air in front of him
  • You were nervous about telling him about the fact that you can fly, but you also didn’t like keeping secrets from him
  • V is quiet for a long time
  • And then he grabs his camera and takes a photo of you
  • He loves you and accepts you for what you are and what you can do
  • In fact, he wants you to become his new muse
  • “But V, nobody can know about my powers” ;;;
  • “Ah, people know I’m very good with Photoshop anyway.”
  • He loves taking photos of you while you’re flying around the house and sometimes you’d even surprise him by flying behind him and giving him a quick kiss on the cheek
  • He thinks of you as his angel and sometimes he realizes that he’s staring at you too long, grinning like a fool
  • A fool in love
  • He’d make sure to get curtains for the windows in his house though, to make sure no one ever finds out about your powers
  • He would love to work on an exhibit with photos of you flying
  • He would call his exhibit, “Angel from Heaven”

Saeran

  • He always wonders why you were always so damn cold
  • Even when all the aircons, fans, windows are closed and he’s sweating profusely, your skin is still cold to the touch
  • Until finally you tell him you never feel hot or sweat because you have superpowers
  • And he just blinks at you
  • And you create a small flurry around him and Saeran is shook
  • He’s never one for words but you can see it in his eyes that he’s awed by you
  • “Show me more.”
  • And so you do
  • When Saeyoung isn’t home, you freeze the floor of his bunker and Saeran immediately slips, falling on his butt
  • And you’re laughing because he’s angrily avoiding your gaze, cheeks red
  • You teach him how to skate and you two end up slipping a lot, but that’s okay because Saeran is actually laughing and having fun
  • You also make him bing su (shaved ice desserts?) right from your fingertips and top it off with loads of sweet toppings and he’s the happiest man alive
  • Seriously, he will never let you go, this man wants you all to himself
  • He would never tell anyone your secret of course, except Saeyoung
  • And he would encourage you to be yourself when you’re at home, not holding back your powers or anything
  • He’s secretly glad that you have powers so you can defend yourself, but he’s also scared someone might take you away from him (because he’s afraid something bad will happen to Saeyoung one of these days too) so whenever you’re not looking, he’ll go through private companies’ databases to make sure no one knows about you

Vanderwood

  • You were curled up in bed by the time he finished cleaning the apartment you shared
  • And as he stepped out of the shower, he hears you cry out
  • “No! Get away!”
  • Vanderwood rushes out of the bathroom wrapped only in his towel and he immediately scans the room for signs of any intruders
  • But he sees that you’re still in bed, eyes shut tight and he realizes you’re only having a nightmare
  • It looks like you’re reaching for something though, because your hands are pointed at the ceiling and holy shit everything in the room was hovering in the air
  • Vanderwood just stands there and blinks, not knowing what to do
  • “Help!”
  • Everything starts shaking and Vanderwood rushes to your side and grabs your shoulders
  • “MC! MC, wake up!”
  • And when you open your eyes everything falls to the floor
  • And you’re staring into the anxious eyes of your boyfriend
  • “Are you okay?”
  • “Yeah, but what’s going—”
  • You see the mess around you and realize you must have used your powers in your sleep
  • Lol now Vanderwood would have to clean the room again hahahaha
  • So you tell Vanderwood everything and he only sighs
  • “I thought I had secrets,” he would mutter
  • He’s more worried about you now because if the wrong people found out about you, you’d get taken away
  • He knows how these things work, he’s a secret agent
  • So he always makes it a point to check whether anybody has any leads on you but thankfully there aren’t
  • Insists that you don’t walk around alone at night and asks Saeyoung to fortify the defenses around the apartment
  • He’s amazed at your powers but mostly this man would be concerned for your safety because he doesn’t want anybody to perform experiments on you
  • Of course he’s also fucking turned on because he’s into weapons and his girlfriend doesn’t even need weapons, you could defend yourself with just your thoughts omfg


Check out my other works here!

Mango Shake/Ko-fi is always very much appreciated (ᵔᴥᵔ)

Jhope with a chubby girlfriend

  • A F F E C T I O N
  • He could give less that 2 shits what people thing about your size differences
  • Loves you for who you are
  • This man worships you like a goddess
  • Which is what you deserve
  • Wakes you up with coffee and and breakfast from the coffee shop down the road
  • Literally takes 3 seconds for him to fall in love with you
  • Probably says i love you first but then gets scared that you will leave him so he tries to take it but you shut him up by kissing him and confessing your love for him after
  • Will adore you
  • If you finds you looking a mirror pointing out the things you dislike about yourself expect him to point out everything he loves about you
  • You two are a power couple
  • I mean shit gets done when you two work together
  • You co-produce a song for his mixtape his is amazed by your song writing skills so ehenever he needs help he goes to you first (which makes rap mon a little jealous)
  • The boys seeing how well you are together and telling off anyone who disagrees
  • Yoongi always commenting how disgusting you guys’ being lovey dovey was
  • Dirty stuff😏😣
  • 👏DICC 👏PRINTS 👏IN👏SWEATPANTS
  • He purposely wears his sweatpants low so that you can see his v-line
  • Will spend hours in bed with you in bed reminding you of everything sexual he loves about your body
  • “You know jagiya i love how when you cum your thighs squeeze together and i have to push them apart so i can finish my meal” (i almost just fell out imagining that)
  • “You taste like heaven”
  • Anytime you randomly ask him for sex he would tease the hell out of you before agreeing
  • “Oh, is my jagiya sso desperate for my cock?”
  • When you respond “yes daddy”, he gets hard and fucks you into oblivion
  • Loves to be in control
  • Loves you big booty. Pays attention to it
  • Also makes sure you are comfortable at all times
  • If you say you dont like that position or kink he will drop it
  • He loves you more than anything in this world
  • Cuddling aftercare is a must. After you clean yourselves he is attached to you at the hip
  • If you are sore in the morning he will give you a massage that leads to round 2
  • All in all you guys are two suns together and everyone sees that

Originally posted by sweaterpawsjimin

5
“I don’t know whether to worship at your feet or spank the living shit out of you.” Oh, I know what I want right now. I gaze up at him, blinking through my mask. I just wish I could read what’s in his eyes. “I’ll take option two, please,” I whisper frantically as the applause dies down. His lips part as he inhales sharply. Oh that chiseled mouth—I want it on me, now. I ache for him. He gives me a radiant sincere smile that leaves me breathless. “Suffering, are you? We’ll have to see what we can do about that.”

Full credit to @butteredonions for the inspiration for the backstory to this piece (sorry about the delay, Onions!)


“You used to be my hero, you know. It took a long time to let go of that image.”

Lance says it with a little laugh, head tilted towards the stars. Shiro turns his gaze away. He’d ask why they didn’t send Keith, but he figures he knows. This is his punishment. Turning a weapon on a guest isn’t very paladin-like — isn’t very heroic.

“Bet I helped with that,” he says.

Keep reading

zodiac signs as shit dave strider says

Aries: my gaping furnace is hungry for coal so get goddamn shoveling 

Taurus: you just rigged the thing with an oedipal harness and rode its torso like a log flume ride down a magical rainbow 

Gemini: sir im afraid the comet is the size of your moms dick

Cancer: so lets all just sit back a while and shoot the shit and i do mean empty our clips into the shit, like really pump that turd full of lead

Leo: dudes be worshipping me left and right i cant hardly walk down the street without stepping over torsos of the prostrate 

Virgo: btw my name is Akwete Purrmusk hardest buttock in the jungle

Libra: this book is now like our fight fueled ouija board of cock

Scorpio: hey were gonna hunt frogs til you shoot me through the jack
then i die and youve got to make out with me

Sagittarius: im sure you know what kind of crooked ass baloneyfuck powers she got cant let her turn those against us

Capricorn: no fuck you im not caressing your dream hologram 

Aquarius: what is with girls and their universally constant tendency to rip out plumbing fixtures

Pisces: you dont seem to harbor any sympathy for the fact that ive burrowed fuck deep into lively fluffy muppet buttock

Boxy Beast (Test Run Part 1/2)

Context: This was my first ever run of DnD, I was playing 1 on 1 with a friend of mine so he could teach me as a new timer. In my first dungeon, I got a box, and decided to open it up when I’m at the inn.

DM: You don’t wanna just open it now?

Me(OOC): No way! I don’t trust you, I half expect you to say a bunch of tentacles come up out of it or some shit, and if that’s what happens, I don’t want it to be in the middle of town, it’s gotta be private!

DM: Whaaat? You think Iwould do that? I would never! I have no idea what you’re talking about!

Me(OOC): Yeah, sure, says the guy who had Shrek attack me in my first dungeon, while my fighting companion was a plastic flamingo and a goblin who worshiped it as a god.

DM: No clue what you’re talking about.

Me(OOC): And had All Star by Smash Mouth playing during the whole fight.

DM: Nope, no idea.

Me(OOC): Yeah, yeah, whatever. I wanna open it at the inn.

DM: Alright, fine. You go to the inn and check in. (He moves my token to the inn)

Me(OOC): Okay. As soon as I’m comfortable and alone in my room, I open the box.

DM: You open the box and feel a bunch of tentacles come out-

Me(OOC): Oh my GOD

RFA + V + Saeran Kinks

Anonymous said:

RFA + V + Saeran kinks plS ^q^ <3

Here you go! Also I’m sorry that some are longer than others. I elaborated more on the people that had more kinks because I really feel like Yoosung,V and Jaehee are generally very vanilla. Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy!

I also got carried away with saeran please forgive me but you're welcome saeran stans

NSFW below!!

Yoosung 

 I honestly don’t see him as much of a kinky person. He’s pretty vanilla in terms of everyday sex. Occasionally spicing it up with a bit of role play. Even though yoosung isn’t the type, he’d be open to trying new things as long as it’s not tooooo crazy. He’d be open to things like extended foreplay is that even a kink i don’t even know

 Zen 

 bODY WORSHIPING IS HIS THING! He will never stop telling you how beautiful you are and how much he loves every inch of your gorgeous body. especially if you wore lingerie. He is also into consent (obviously they would all need consent, but he like to verbally hear it many times) he would love to ask you vulgar questions just to hear your response. the way you would answer as he’s thrust into you just makes him nghhhhhhh- the beast™ 

 Jumin 

rough sex. enough said He’d love the ddlg stuff. i don’t think he’s much of a sadist though. he’d just want to control you make you feel like he owns you. he’d like some minor bdsm play such as handcuffs blindfolds and silk ties you guys saw that coming he loves seeing you squirm in the binds as he continues to pleasure you, things getting more and more heated as he hears your whimpers. He’d also want to mark you but he’s gotta do it in places that aren’t visible to the general public out of respect to you and to spare you the embarrassment even though he’d really want to do it anyway (he’d probably just leave one on your collarbone bc he couldn’t resist) 

 Jaehee

 I also really don’t think she is kinky. there isn’t much to say about her honestly. i think she might be an exhibitionist. the feeling of being caught gives her that rush that she can’t get anywhere else. She tends to follow all the rules so she gets really excited when there is a possibility to be caught doing something “bad" 

 Saeyoung 

is a low key daddy honestly. He is a confirmed sadist so i don’t doubt he will drag out foreplay to tease you in every way he sees fit. He also has a roleplay kink. He’ll bring out costumes that he bought for you to get your opinion. I also feel like he’d be an experimentalist. He’s always down to try something new with the consent of both people. He also has a thing for sound. Hear me out on this. anytime in mysme when things got heated saeyoung never has his glasses on. i’m telling you right now his vision is sHIT. he just stares at a screen all day so it’s a given. since he doesn’t wear his glasses during sex, he’d probably close his eyes. which heightens his other senses. it's a reach I know I have an overactive imagination 

 V 

okay he is not kinky whatsoever. He is super vanilla. but i do see him being into body worshiping. he’d want to make you feel like the goddess he says you are. he also has a thing for taking pictures and videos of the intimate moments. 

 jihyun i swear to god if that click sound was your camera 

 Saeran

 like i mentioned before this dude is kINKY OH GOD PLEASE I KNOW IM GONNA GET CARRIED AWAY WITH THIS okay so first of all he has a major dominance thing. he always wants to be the one to dominate you but imagine him being bottom oh shit that’s going to the spank bank (i also may write a fic about this in the near future) he will dabble into light bdsm like blindfolds and handcuffs or rope. also he’s definitely a sadist, but he will only give you pleasurable pain because he’s afraid to hurt you although he’d never admit it. Overstimulation is his favorite thing. I even touched on this in my dirty talking headcanon shameless plug seeing your body writhe underneath him as you beg him to stop in between moans oH GOD I NEED TO STOP NOW

A-Z NSFW: Minhyuk

Originally posted by nottechae

Cr.

Donate | Masterlist 

A = Aftercare
Minhyuk is pretty tentative after sex, he’s very big on taking care of you afterwards. Sex isn’t something insane that results in needing extensive aftercare, not vanilla, just not like a circus. So with Minhyuk it’s minimal. Typically it’s just cleaning up and curling up together, tender kisses and pillow talk.


B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
He’s more than aware on how nice his hands are. Minhyuk knows how skilled he is with his digits, and it honestly goes to his head, how easy it is to have you come undone with his fingers alone. Truthfully, it’s more of an ego thing than it genuinely being his favorite, but still.

C = Cum 

Minhyuk is…slightly possessive and it shows during sex. He’s one that lowkey gets into marking and cumming on you as if he thinks he’s a fckin dog and peeing on a tree. He’s got a fixation on spilling on your lower tummy, where it would have been inside on you, just were he can see you completely fucked out and his seed pooling on your skin.

D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)
Being kind of a goof, I can’t imagine Minhyuk hiding too much from you. What little he keeps in the back of his head(which let’s be real, probs won’t stay a secret for long) is probably kink things he wants to play with or that ‘so i may or may not have sat through that salad porn thing but i feel like i should prob keep that fact to myself’


E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
Minhyuk’s played the game, he knows very well what to do. At the very least, he’s a quick learner, and a skilled man, even if he didn’t have prior experience, he picks up on what to do rather quickly.

F = Favorite position
Leaning more to the vanilla side of things, Minhyuk doesn’t get too wild with positions. He tends to stick to missionary or from behind, spooning or you on on top. Spooning or missionary are more of his favorites, he likes the full contact and being able to surround you and have complete access to your entire body. 


G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Unless he’s in a role, Minhyuk is pretty easygoing during sex. He’s one you can expect to get stuck trying to take his pants off, fall off the bed, and end up laughing about it for a solid five minutes before continuing. He’s not purposely a clown in the bed, but he can’t help it. Minhyuk’s definitely more towards the goofy end of the spectrum. 

H = Hair (How well groomed are they)
Minhyuk isn’t a super groom guy. I think he manscapes a bit here and there, but just to keep things neat and in order. And not very often, maybe once or twice a month, if that. It’s not a huge concern of his. 


I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

As goofy as he is, and the things he likes in the bedroom, Minhyuk is fairly intimate. He’s got quite a tender touch regardless of what’s happening, his actions exude affection, and Minhyuk is quite a sweet talker in bed. 

J = Jack Off (Masturbation)
Not gonna lie, I think he’s a little shit that would send you stuff, videos and pictures, when he jerks off. He makes a big show of it, moaning over the top just to fuck with you. And when it’s all said and done, he’ll send you a sweet little text, “I may not be able to get at you right now, but I bet you’ll be thinking about my dick until I see you again. Love you!” kind of shit. 


K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Minhyuk’s got a few things under his belt. Body worship is probably the biggest one. Going both ways, he loves you loving on every part of him just as much as he does you. Regardless of if he’s being a lovey boy during sex, or being Lucifer himself, he’s laying you out and taking his sweet ol’ time with you. No part of you goes untouched and unkissed. Marking isn’t always there but Minhyuk gets in a mood every now and again, and won’t be satisfied until you’re a garden of purple and red flowers. Overstimulation is a light kink. He likes working you up over and over again, just playing out body worship ends up with you cumming at least once. Having your senses so heightened, and twitching at the slightest touch from him, is one thing he loves a lot, but he doesn’t toy with that too much. 

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

The shower is Minhyuk’s favorite place to play. Usually because he gets to act all innocent, and what was supposed to be just a shower, or a quick clean up (”c’mon babe, save water! i promise to behave…”). Then “turn around, I’ll wash your hair for you.” escalates. “Are you hard?” “I’m sorry.” “No you’re not.” “I know.”

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

I feel like he’d be one that’s easy to turn on? Like a ‘accidental’ brush across his front, or a well placed kiss just behind his ear, and Minhyuk’s absolutely done for. 

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

While he does get somewhat possessive and is semi dominant, Minhyuk’s not in to the pain things. Light taps on your bottom, sure, but full blown spankings aren’t even something he considers. He’s not a fan of bondage, he quite likes feeling you scratch at his back or squeezing his arms.  

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

With his liking in body worship, both in giving and receiving, oral plays a huge role in it. Minhyuk has a gifted tongue, and he’s fully aware of that. He’s got no objection to having you a moaning mess around his head just from the wet muscle. When going down on him, he gives you completely control to go at your own pace and do what you want. He almost relishes in you having power over him in that time. 

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
Minhyuk’s one of the guys I describe as a rabbit. He’s pretty eager, and quick most of the times. Setting a fast pace, but usually average strength. He may move quicker than typical, but he’s not going to be beating bruises in to your skin with his hips that is unless you ask for it A steady rhythm, faster pace, but not too strong, gets the job done well. 


Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
He’s got sort of a love/hate relationship with quickies. Minhyuk’s not opposed to them, he’d just much rather have proper sex. But he’ll never turn down an opportunity to get his hands on you, even if he’s on a time crunch. So bottom line, not the biggest fan, but quickies do happen more frequently than he’d like, but Minhyuk’s okay with dealing with them, as long as he gets to have you in his arms.


R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Being fairly private with his sexual relationship, or relationship in general, Minhyuk’s not the biggest risk taker if it’s super risky. If there’s a chance someone can see and know what you’ve done, or actually walk in on you, he’s out of the equation. But things that reside in the bedroom, between you and him alone, he’s usually game. Positions, role plays, toys you want to bring in, he’s usually pretty open to it as long as it’s in private. 

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Minhyuk’s stamina passes the average just a little bit. Not enough to be considered abnormal, but enough to notice in during sex. One round is the top, most of the time, though. But he’s usually able to last longer than average; he can last anywhere from ten minutes to twenty or longer if he plays his cards right. 

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
Most toys aren’t going to show up in the bedroom. The only thing Minhyuk plays around with is things that vibrate, that make you squirm in a whole new way. The toys don’t pop up consistently, often enough for fun and games, but they’re not something that’s always part of sex. 


U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Being a fan of overstimulation, Minhyuk teases every now and again. Usually, unless he’s playing with making you cum multiple times to make you sensative, he’s not a huge tease. He’s playful, sure, but over the top teasing isn’t really his style. It’s nice and all, but he’d rather get to the fun stuff, instead of teasing you, and himself, in the process. 

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’s pretty vocal in the bedroom, Minhyuk doesn’t hold back his moans. And he certainly doesn’t keep his voice down when he’s letting filth spill from his pretty lips, either. Minhyuk’s kind of private with his sex life, but he’s not going to silence himself when he’s with you. If someone hears, they hear. Oh well. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Minhyuk is pretty consistent in the bedroom. It’s not boring, don’t get it twisted, but you know what to expect when you get to the bed with him, you feel? Well, being the self aware man, he knows and decides to completely change one night, spontaneous outburst of sexy times. Being the typical fun guy, sex is pretty lighthearted and chill, he floods the room with a sense of power as he dominates you into next week.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Minhyuk is another one that’s more motion in the ocean, rather than showing. He’s fairly average, 5-5.2″ in length. More slender in size, he’s not the girthiest of guys. It’s not going to be a banana in a cheerio situation.  

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
He’s one that I think would be more hands on. Maybe not always horny, but he’s really touchy feely in an affectionate way. He’s always got a hold on something; your hand, waist, etc. Minhyuk’s right in the middle of the spectrum, he’s got a pretty average drive, nothing insanely out of the norm.


Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Minhyuk doesn’t wear out too easily just from sex, so he usually doesn’t crash soon afterwards. Typically it’s just some chill cuddle sessions, and pillow talk and maybe a little cat nap, but unless it’s just bedtime, he’s not a quick sleeper. Minhyuk’s just really relaxed after sex, not sleepy.

Originally posted by wonhoescenarios

Hoseok just really wants you to forget about your party

Slightly smutty but not really?? A little bit of dirty talk which is kinda my favourite thing

Word count: 732

“Don’t look at me like that Hoseok.” Your tone held the frustration you were feeling but he merely smirked at you from the bed.  
“Look at you like what?” He feigned innocence, watching you run in and out of the room in your underwear frantically.
“You know what!” The next time you enter the room, he’s stood waiting for you, arms outstretched.  
“Come here, baby,” he said with a chuckle. Pouting, you walked towards him, his chest warm against your cheek and his arms a secure warmth that never failed to make you melt into his embrace.  
“Did you hide it?” You asked. “I won’t be mad, but this party is important to me, so if you hid it, could you just tell me where it is?” He squeezed you a little harder at the question, bending and kissing along your shoulder.  
“I didn’t hide your dress, but I can see that it’s on a clothes hanger on the back of the door.”
With a sigh of relief you moved to leave Wonho’s embrace, only for him to pull your back to his chest. Delicate fingers played with the waistband of your black panties. About to voice your exasperation you were quickly cut short when the electric feeling of his soft lips was felt against your neck.  

“Just stay for a little bit, at least long enough for me to go down on you… Twice.” He tongued at your collarbone, the atmosphere slowly getting a little hotter between you two. For a few seconds you were caught, the way your boyfriend was licking and kissing at your skin clouding your mind in the best way possible, all thought of the business party you had to go to out of the window. Heat shot through your body when his hand slid down the front of your underwear and his index finger brushed your clit. You pulled away with hot cheeks.  

“Not right now, Hoseok.” He pouted behind you, watching your ass shake as you walked to the door and pulled your dress down before stepping into the soft material. Graciously, he zipped the back of your dress up, seductively whispering, “You just look so fuckable right now, like you just want to be bent over and fucked until you see stars.” He was used to getting his own way when he used words like that. He could sense your resolve swaying so he continued. “If i unzip this dress and put my hand down your panties, will you be wet? I think you would be. I could sit you on your dresser and eat you out until you’re shaking and sweating,” his wandering hands ran up your sides, cupping your breasts and squeezing them in his palms as his lips kissed your neck between every few words. His voice was low and seductive and everything that made your head spin. The cheeky little shit wasn’t about to let up either.
“I could help you relax. Maybe even a quick fuck if you’re a good girl and do what I say. You know how much you love it when I’m on my knees in front of you, worshipping your pretty pussy like you know I should.” He decided to push his luck and reinforce his point about just how willing he is, how you would both enjoy it, by grinding against your ass and a small gasp escaped your lips before you could think to stop it. He thought he had you. He really thought he had you.

With an elegance he wasn’t even sure you possessed, you slipped from his loosening hold with a cheeky smirk and and unnecessary sway of your hips. His face was a picture of betrayal and thinly veiled lust, his hands reaching to keep your warmth as close as possible. Nothing was going to get in the way of the plans you already had, despite his protestations.  
“I think it’s time you learnt some patience, baby, you can’t always have it your way you know?” He opened his mouth to protest, to get you to reconsider but you had already grabbed your purse. “No having fun while I’m gone okay, no matter how much you think about my pretty pussy. Bye baby.” You called over your shoulder, leaving a pouty, horny, frustrated Hoseok standing in your room, wishing you were with him. He really thought he had you.