I try to remember that every day

10

This man is my hero.
This man reminds me every day to keep trying and to be proud of myself.

I’m feeling a bit depressed? No problem, Mark is always there to make my day.
I’m feeling unmotivated? Not an issue, I remember that Mark is always encouraging us, and he believes we can do great things.

Mark has done so much for us, and continues to do so every single day. I wish there was some way we could really show him how much we care for him, and how proud we are of him.

This man is incredible.

my lil tips for feeling better

face:

  • wash your face at least once a day, with a cleanser and a moisturizer that works for your skin (you can add a toner and serum to the routine too)
  • keep a lip balm on you at all times
  • please try to remember to brush your teeth. i know, you’re very sleepy and your bed is very comfortable, but still
  • try out some face masks every once in awhile!

hair:

  • find a shampoo and conditioner that really works for you and makes your hair smell nice
  • try to skip using the heat tools and embrace the natural look, your hair will thank you for it
  • deep conditioner? hair masks? argan oil? go for it
  • for those of you with long hair: keep a hair tie on you at all times

hands:

  • keep a small hand cream in your purse to keep your hands from getting dry after washing them
  • maybe keep a cuticle cream in your purse too? (it really helps me stop picking at my cuticles because this motion is actually a good kind of fidgeting instead of harmful, and it keeps them from drying out in the process)
  • paint your nails a light beige/pink neutral color. it’s subtle but looks so elegant and goes with everything

body:

  • moisturize!!!!! after every shower!!!! whether it be lotion or coconut oil or what, it’s important!! dry skin is uncomfortable and does not make you feel better
  • find a perfume you like and spray it on whenever you need a lil pick-me-up. smelling nice = feeling nice
  • take a multivitamin every! day!
  • and take your medications! don’t forget!
  • try to incorporate eating something kinda healthy every day (maybe just one fruit! that’s all!)

Dear readers,

I tried to make this brief, but I think I failed.

Today on Twitter and Tumblr, I posted about piracy and the effect it had had on the publishing side of the Raven Cycle. Several readers lashed out at me and asked why I did not merely release an 11,000 word story for free if the publisher had decided not to release it — further, they noted, other “big name authors” released “loads” of free content and since I didn’t release “loads” of things for free, surely this meant I just was in it for the money.

I don’t have a lot to add to the piracy commentary that is already up, other than the fate of the Raven Cycle and all its extras are up to my U.S. publisher and so therefore the discussion is weighted toward U.S. buyers. 

And I’m not going to speak to the giving away art for free business. The internet has discussed this a lot already, and the fact is that if you take away a paying-for-art model, you end up only getting art from people who can afford to work in their spare time or art that is supported by patrons — both models that we have seen before, both models that end up giving you art produced by and for a homogenous and upper class group. So moving on.

What I will speak to is the “loads” of free content business, because I haven’t addressed this before. I know there are authors who do release loads of free content. Stories of all lengths. Still other authors release loads of extra content available for a low cost, stories and novellas, etc. I can very much see how this is thrilling to readers. However, this will never be me, for four reasons:

1. I am bad at thinking episodically. I think of my novels in novel-shape, and it is difficult for me to think of stories that do not exist within that plotline. Just write Gansey and Blue going grocery shopping, urge readers, but I can’t think of how to make that into a satisfying story shape that will not diminish the original novels, introduce world-building that I will later regret, and be satisfying in one sitting. So ideas come to me very rarely that fit the idea of an extra. 

2. My deleted scenes are 99% bad versions of scenes that exist in the novel. They are not me deciding to cut a scene of Gansey and Blue going grocery shopping. They are me trying five different settings for the same conversation. They’re not extra, they’re less. 

3. I have always been a slow or at least very exclusive writer. I have a year between books and it takes me all of that time to write them, to think about them, to conceptualize them. I hear about some writers who write their contracted novels and then, in addition, write 10,000 word fanfics. HOW. I am not that person. If I try to write any faster, or write two things at the same time, all that happens is that I have to delete bad words twice as often, or end up writing the same story with two different titles. 

4. I am even slower now. I had not posted about my health crisis, because I didn’t want to be that person who talked about their gout at a party, but here it is. Folks who follow me on the internet may have noticed over the past several years that I was posting with increasing frequency about migraines and brain fog. In June, I grew rapidly ill at a seminar and collapsed (I think there’s still a photo of me lying on pavement behind the scenes). I had to be shipped home, canceled a tour for the first time ever, and then spent several weeks trying to get better. I did, sort of — but even weeks later, I wasn’t really better. I had hives all over my body. My hair was falling out. I was weirdly missing abstract thought — some days I could remember my home address, but I couldn’t say it out loud. I also couldn’t stay awake. I had to sleep every four hours, and every time I ate food, I got even more tired. And when I did sleep, it wasn’t real sleep. A drugged, enchanted, dreamless, sick sleep. There are photos all over the internet of me pulled over by the side of the interstate to sleep because when a reaction hit, there was no option. There is also a photo of my crumpled Mitsubishi that happened when I was too tired to avoid the tractor trailer that ran into me on the highway. I should’ve realized sooner that I was having an immune reaction, but it snuck up slowly. Bloodwork ruled out cancer and lupus, but showed that I had no immune system left whatsoever. Since then, I’ve been on a low-histamine diet of about six foods (hence the photographs of the groceries I carry with me on tour) and I’ve slowly become brighter and more like the self I remember from way back when, 2015 self. I can write again, without words looking like foreign intruders on the page. Migraines have vanished. I still have to be incredibly cautious — every time my body is exposed to or creates histamines (dog hair! limes! plane travel!), it still produces hives or puts me into an instant drugged sleep. But I’m getting better. I just can’t do anything stupid. I also just can’t write fast. I will do anything to keep from going back to June 2017 Maggie. 

All of this is to say that I wish I could be one of those authors that could surprise and delight with extras. But for many reasons, I can’t be. I’m continually delighted that readers love my books, and I hope those will continue to be enough.

urs,

Stiefvater


eta: yes, that’s why you no longer see me with cookies. No flour, no eggs, no dairy. :(

i know we all have our own lives. we spiral in our own orbits. i’m telling myself the reason you never text is because you’re busy. i ask you how things are going, the conversation is stilted. remember when we were madly in love. when you would text me with every stupid joke you thought of. 

“how you been?” i ask. three days later i get, “fine.” 

i am trying to tell myself: at least you’re alive.

I first tried to kill myself when I had just turned 19 years old,
to this day I remember the feeling of the pills going down my throat,
swallowing them so effortlessly
as though it were my destiny.
As though I was built with this capacity 
to self destruct,
built with the capacity
to destroy this body that my mother pushed out into the world.
‘Ironic,’ I thought.
A month after my birthday, I try to take my life,
I end up in the psychiatric ward of the hospital I was born in.
I make a tally for every time I looked around the empty room
and wondered how I could make things final this time.
I make a tally for every time someone says I don’t look like
I’m supposed to be there.
I make a tally for every lie I’ve told:
Were you sexually abused? [x]
Did you have prior suicidal thoughts? [x]
Would you do it again? [x]
Do you use drugs or alcohol? [x]
I lie and deny it all, but how do you deny what’s in your blood?
I was built with an addictive personality,
my mother likes pretty little white lines and risky sex
and my father likes hard liquor and smoking cigarettes. 
I was built with this capacity to deceive,
built with a baby face and angel wings,
but I sink my claws and watch myself bleed whenever I can’t feel a thing.
And I’m decomposing,
hiding empty bottles in my closet, in the hamper, and under my bed.
I can’t flourish with the thoughts screaming,
‘USE ME, USE ME. DON’T HANDLE WITH CARE.’
So don’t ask me why I hate the beach,
because I can’t control anything around me
other than my food intake.
And don’t ask me why I can’t wear shorts anymore
or why I wear long sleeves in 80 degree weather.
Don’t ask why I stay in places I shouldn’t
when I’ve already accepted my fate.
To live as fire, consume all that I can, before I quickly burn out.
I THINK DEAR EVAN HANSEN CUT SONGS ARE IMPORTANT

okay hear me out

I’ve been listening to these songs 1  2  that were cut from the musical (probably because they made it too long or because they talked about things that were later resumed in other songs) AND I’VE COLLECTED SOME THINGS

We can consider this canon, those are facts that don’t affect the plot and were made by the authors so I’m stuck with it.

1. In this song Cynthia says this: ‘ The missing pills from the medicine cabinet.
The missing kid found passed out in the park.’ so THANKS TO THAT WE NOW KNOW HOW AND WHEN HE DIED. Probably after that first day of school, because he was absent three days after someone found him, he grabbed those ‘missing pills’ and died due to pill overdose.

2. Also in that first song she says he ‘used to love jokes! when he was a little boy? ‘why did the chicken cross the road?’ he had a million answers to that one!’ so, like any cheerful little kid he liked jokes that probably turned to bitter sarcasm with the years. 

3. There’s this other song in which Cynthia says ‘ Saw the counselors and the clinics
And the cures a mother tries
Cause maybe they could take away that anger in your eyes’ which means they were trying. He probably was on meds and probably was tired of psychiatrists. 

4. Both songs talk about how Cynthia and Connor fought after dinner every dinner and how Connor pulled himself away with every fight:  ‘ We went to battle every evening after dinner
I thought I knew some way that I’d get through to you,
Remember?
In the bedroom down the hall
We fought a war where no one walked away a winner
Cause every day you pulled a little more away,
Remember?’ and ‘ All that I’ve thought about is how hard he would slam that bedroom door,
Every night after dinner.
Wild-eyed and weary, from all those nights of fighting a war
Where no one was the winner.’

5. Okay this is not about Connor but we now know Connor and Evan had one thing in common. Heidi about Evan: ‘In the bedroom down the hall
I surprised you with that comic book collection
Next Halloween,
I dressed you up like Wolverine,
Remember?’  and Cynthia about Connor  ‘The years of trick or treating, my spiderman, he stood at 4 foot 2, such a happy child.’

THEY BOTH LIKE COMICS!!! so they could have been friends they actually had things in common and thanks to these songs now we know Connor was a human and not a monster. Sure, he was mean and that’s not nice nor forgivable but at least we know (thanks to a little bit of light) that he was  really trying.

I wonder what would have been of them both if they had talked things out, Evan and Connor I mean. I know mental illnesses can not be magically cured by a lover but having someone by your side (as a friend too) really helps, and they were in the same position so maybe they would have been of help for each other.

anyway that’s all

A Window View - Peter Parker

request -  Can you do a peter x stark!reader where when he first meets her, she’s sleeping on Tony’s couch in a weird way when Tony’s about to introduce peter to her. Peter just finds it absolutely adorable and when she wakes up and sees peter she gets all awkward while getting off the couch and trips a little. Btw love your blog its amazing. Everything on her is absolutely amazing

a/n - thank you so much for 3k!!! all of the love and support i’ve been getting has made me so grateful, thank you for everything :) hopefully this fic isn’t too trashy and a flop like me but don’t forget to request a peter parker/spider-man fic if you’d like and follow!

The alarm on my phone rang at an amazingly annoying tone for the third time during a 20 minute period. The sun was just peeking through the windows into the living room, having the awakened chatter of the city commence at this hour. The tower was beginning to wake up as the sun rose higher into the sky, while I was doing the complete opposite.

I groaned, lifting my head and scrambling for my phone that was on the coffee table. It was nearly 10 AM, but I didn’t know, and I also didn’t care. I was up until two o’clock in the morning the night before, studying for a test that I would be having later this evening. I seemed to have become so concentrated that my head was on top of my History textbook, having the page still open to the same one from last night.

Shut up.” I hissed at my phone, squinting at the screen as I turned the alarm off. I hummed in content as I turned my head back around, grabbing my pencil pouch and cuddling it close to my body as I fell back asleep. Considering my situation, and just how lazy I became, I just really didn’t give it a second thought these days. No one would be up here until noon most days, so I was content with it.

I was already too deep in my slumber to hear the doors slide open, only to have my father and someone else come in.

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what if lance had a fake name to talk with hunk about the guy (keith) he had a crush on at the garrison so that if keith is in the room he doesn’t know they’re talking about him but one day he overhears lance talking about this guy and his first thought is “weird name” and his second thought is “wait WHAT WHO–” and he spends days sulking in his room trying to remember every single boy in their class (points if he makes a conspiracy board about it) and yet he still can’t figure out but starts paying attention more to the way lance talks about him (”what does he have that i don’t”) and one day he can’t take it anymore and tells lance “lol i bet he isn’t even that cool” and lance laughs and leaves the room cuz well he knows keith’s basically dissing himself, until there’s a confrontation and keith tries very subtly to ask lance who the mysterious guy is.

”i swear i’m just..curious that’s all. maybe,,,maybe its the same guy I HAD a crush on ha ha ha……”

“I really doubt it…you can’t have a crush on yourself.”

and finally realization hits keith full force and the first thing he tells lance is “wait…i was jealous of MYSELF this whole time?????” lance nods and gives him a kiss on the cheek

What I Learned From University

FIRST YEAR

  • Everyone is super friendly, especially in the first few weeks → Introduce yourself to the people sitting near you for the first few weeks of lectures. Everyone is looking for a friend or at least someone to talk to!!
  • If you commute, make that time productive → My bus ride was an hour there and back each day. It sucks but I would try to be productive for at least half of the commute. I have a post about being productive on public transport here.
  • On that note, stay on campus as long as possible each day → As soon as I got back home I would procrastinate every little thing. Stay in an already productive environment for as long as possible.
  • Maybe don’t buy your textbooks used → I thought I was being smart by buying used textbooks (most schools will have a buy and sell facebook page for textbooks). I ended up having to pay for access codes in order to do my online homework – access codes that cost ~$70 separately and came included with new textbooks anyways. Email your prof or talk to someone who has recently taken the class to find out if you need an access code. If you do, your best bet is to buy a new version of the textbook (unless you can get a seriously cheap used textbook).
  • Print off your timetable and find all of your classes before the first day → This helped me so much! I found exactly where all my classes were before the first day of class. I wrote down little tricks to help me remember where everything was (i.e. my calc lecture is in the arts and science building which is also where the only subway on campus is).
  • Don’t knock living at home to save money → If you’re lucky enough to have a college or university close to home at least consider living at home. Getting your own place or living in dorms is expensive. (But if you have to find off campus housing on your own, don’t leave it too late or you might not find a place)
  • Figure out the best way to take notes for each class → You have to customize the way you study for each class, all depending on the prof and the content. I hand-wrote notes for some classes (chem, calc, and physics), but not others (psych and bio). If you’re writing by hand you can always just annotate your textbook notes or lecture slides (if they’re posted before class). If you fall behind while taking notes, just leave a gap and check out a friend’s notes after class.
  • Adjust your expectations → Don’t expect to get straight A’s, like you might have in high school. You can strive for straight A’s but be realistic as time goes on. For classes I struggled with, I expected to be near the class average. If I was a lot lower than the class average then I would know to invest more time.
  • Make time for physical activity → If we’re being honest I hardly exercised during uni. Go for at least a half hour walk each day and try to start a physical activity routine. Get a friend and join a sports team, go to a fitness class, or commit to some form of a daily workout with them! You’ll feel bad bailing on someone else, plus working out is more fun with other people.
  • Review content throughout the semester → Reviewing little bits of content will save you a massive content review right before finals! Look through old notes while you wait for your daily coffee or take 15 minutes to watch some khan academy videos on stuff you learned in the first month of classes.
  • Think seriously about how much you can handle → Don’t take on too many responsibilities at once and consider all of your options! I worked weekends and some week nights throughout the school year. Looking back I should have worked less because my stress levels were way too high. Also, quite a few people I talked to took 4 classes instead of 5, for their first semester of university. I don’t think I would have done it, in the end, but it’s always something to consider.
  • Have fun but be responsible at parties → Always go to parties with people you trust!! If you didn’t do much partying/drinking during high school (like me), remember to pace yourself when drinking! Eat before you go out and have some water between each drink, till you find your limit. Don’t let yourself be peer-pressured into anything but also don’t be afraid to have fun! And check out if your uni has a safe walk program (someone will come and walk you back to your dorm or your car if you feel unsafe or nervous for any reason)
  • When procrastination hits, aim to be productive in some way → The only reason my biology mark was so high was because I would study biology whenever I got sick of studying for physics and calculus. If you know you need to study but just can’t do it, start by being productive in some other way – study a subject you do like, do your laundry, organize your study area, etc. Get your brain to start thinking productively.
  • Labs are difficult so be prepared → I had so many labs first year. Some tips: eat and hydrate before labs, never assume you can finish your prelab last minute, be nice to your lab partner, always remember lab safety (don’t be the person trying to wear shorts in the lab, TAs will not hesitate to kick you out), don’t rush through an experiment but be efficient, and ask for help (even if you feel like you’re bothering your TA).
  • Please go to bed early. Sleep affects everything → I was so dumb and would never go to bed early even though I had to be up at 6 am almost every day to catch the bus. Lack of sleep will catch up to you eventually!! Also, all nighters are not necessary, unless you make them necessary. I prioritized and never had to stay awake too late. And never pull an all nighter the night before an exam (you’re better off getting sleep and resting your brain).
  • Bring a water bottle everywhere → Buy a decent water bottle and always carry it with you. Even though my uni is small there are still tons of spots around campus where I can refill my water bottle!! Stay hydrated my friends!
  • A practice problem a day keeps the F away → This saying probably works best for science classes, but I guess a reading a day will get you somewhere too. Do something for every class each day, even if it’s just a practice problem or a quick reading. Develop a routine!
  • You’ll have lots of midterms → I was under the impression that midterms happened just once a semester (I thought I would have one week where I had a midterm for each class). That was not my reality. I had 2 or 3 midterms for each of my classes scattered throughout the semester. Study really hard for your first set of midterms till you get used to the high expectations!
  • Don’t worry about what other people are doing or thinking → This is mostly in regards to social media. I was bummed when I looked back on my first year of university, because I felt like I hadn’t done anything fun compared to other people. You only see the image that other people want you to see. You don’t know how hard someone worked or how hard they didn’t work. Just focus on you and how you can affect positive results in your life.
  • Other people literally don’t care about your appearance → My friend’s little sister visited campus and asked us “Why is everyone wearing sweatpants?” People literally don’t care. Dress nice and put lots of makeup on one day, because you feel like it, and wear sweats the next day.
  • Start essays and reports as soon as possible → You never know what might come up so be prepared for the worst! Outline your essay or graph your data as soon as you can.
  • Eat healthy and do meal prep → You can eat healthy during university! Set aside a couple of nights each week to do meal prep. Cook food in bulk to save money and don’t eat out too much. Try to have at least 1 serving of fruits or veggies with each meal or snack you eat!
  • Find a good study spot on campus → Explore your campus and figure out your favourite places to study. I had a couple of spots where I would always meet my friends to study and quiet spots where no one would bother me. Studying outside or in an area with natural light is always good.
  • Don’t be afraid to talk to your profs and TAs → This is the number one thing I’m going to try to do more of in my second year. TAs are chill to talk to and they can tell you tons of useful information on what upper year classes are like, which professors are good, why they chose to go to grad school, etc. If you’re struggling in lectures or labs, talk to your prof or TA! Make an appointment and be sure you can tell them exactly which concepts you’re struggling with or at least where you got lost. One of my profs told us he just waits hopefully during office hours for someone to come in. (Also profs love it if you ask them about their research or any topics they seem passionate about during lectures.)
  • Explore all the resources your university has to offer → My university has a program that is basically people bringing their dogs around for students to pet, in order to relieve stress. It actually works and gave me something to look forward to! Just be aware of your options so that if something in your life changes you know where you can go to ask for help.
  • Get a planner and utilize it → There’s no excuse not to have a planner of some sort. Use your phone, get a bullet journal, or buy a cheap planner. Have somewhere where you can record important deadlines and make to do lists. I also recommend back planning all of your studying at the beginning of the semester. Write down your midterms and finals dates and write down how much you’re going to study each day leading up to the exam. This way you’ll be able to look ahead at each month and figure out what needs to be done (i.e. getting an essay done early because the due date falls during a busy week of midterms)

This post ended up being a lot longer than I expected whoops. Take the things I said into consideration but remember that everyone’s experience will be different. Good luck to everyone heading to university!


My Other Posts:

Advice to Baby Witches

Here’s some things I wish someone told me when I was first starting out

  • You’re gonna find a lot of sources that are Wiccan. So if you don’t want to follow Wicca, it might be harder to find things that talk from a non- Wiccan perspective. This is not the only perspective. I encourage you even if you are wanting to follow Wicca to seek out specifically non-Wiccan sources to get a different view point. (nothing against Wicca here; I just think it’s healthy to get differing opinions)


  • It’s still witchcraft even if it doesn’t look like what books/Internets witchcraft looks like. Remember that:
    1. Everyone has a different way of doing things and your craft will never ever be the same as anyone else’s.
    2. The people posting about what witchcraft they’ve done are most of the time showing a perfected version of it. You are just starting out. You should not hold yourself up to the standards of people who have had more time and practice.
    3. It’s actually good that it doesn’t look like anyone else’s because that means that it’s entirely your own.
  • I know it can feel very daunting first getting involved in witchcraft because there is so much to learn. Trust me, you cannot learn everything, and that is okay.


  • Take things step by step. Find something that really excites you. For example, say you are really interested in deity worship. Focus on just that first. Research different deities and meditate on the ones that interest you. Once you feel like you’ve learned enough (you don’t have to be an expert by any means, just to a point where you feel like you have your foot in the door) then you can move on to something else. You don’t have to do it this way, but I found it helped me narrow things down.


  • The idea that “if you don’t know what your doing with witchcraft it can backfire” is a myth. Don’t be afraid to explore, learn new things. That being said, I wouldn’t recommend doing anything outside your skill level either. Maybe save the big deal curses for when you have a good grasp on them. Listen to your intuition on this one, if you feel like something you’re doing is too much for you, don’t do it right away, but work your way up. Don’t give up on it, either. Like I said, if you feel like you don’t have the ability to do something, get to a point where you do.


  • You will have thoughts like “this won’t work” “you’re being stupid” “it’s just some *conventionally useless item*, that can’t do ANYTHING” this is okay. Any intrusive thoughts that tell you it’s not going to work are fine, especially if you are mentally ill. It does not mean your magic looses it’s power because you had an intrusive thought. Yes, the best way to make your magic work is to believe it will work, but intrusive thoughts will not automatically stop the magic from working. Just try your best to overcome them, whatever technique you have for that will work fine. I always use my inner voice to talk back to my intrusive thoughts and say something like “What? That doesn’t even make sense! You’re being ridiculous, random voice in my head that has no attachment to me.” and try to ignore it. Your mental illness does not make you a less powerful of a witch, remember that.


  • You are much more powerful than you realize. Own this. Be empowered by it.


  • You don’t have to have a whole bunch of extravagant altars and read your tarot cards and meditate every day to be considered a ‘real’ witch. You do magic without even realizing it sometimes. It’s sometimes hard to do anything big because of busy schedules/low spoons/being closeted or whatever. Try and incorporate little things in your daily routine. I did this by Stirring my tea clockwise and focusing on the cup, while repeating “this tea will improve my day” in my head. It works great for practicing putting your intent in things, focusing your energy, and it can even work if you live in an unfriendly witch household! Get creative with the little things you can do everyday. And even if you can’t do those things sometimes, don’t worry about it!


  • Be very careful about cultural appropriation in your practice. It can get very dicey as to what is offensive to include in your practice and what is not. I can tell you straight up right now that anything taken from a Native American culture is not okay to incorporate in your practice. A very popular thing that’s taken from Native American culture is smudging. Don’t smudge. There are many alternatives to this. That being said, some things are ok to take from other cultures because those cultures aren’t practiced by living people/are part of a culture or religion that is open to outsiders taking it. Don’t bat yourself up for doing something then finding out it was offensive, because when you recognize it then take necessary steps to fix it, that’s you growing as a person and is a positive change. If you aren’t sure if what your doing is cultural appropriation, ask yourself:


    1. Is what I’m doing practiced by a group of people today? if yes, you’re in the danger zone, but it does not  necessarily mean it is appropriation
    2. Is the religion that it comes from a closed or open religion? (this means is it ok for outsiders, people who do not follow the religion, to practice it. example-Judaism=closed, wicca=open) If closed, it’s probably appropriation.
    3. Am I apart of a race that has a history of oppressing this group of people? If yes, you might want to be cautious about it.
    4. If it is deity related- Do the deities in question give me permission? if no, then definitely do not do it.
    5. What would a person from that religion/culture think if they saw me doing this? If they would not like it, it might not be okay.
    6. Is this from my heritage/ancestral background? Don’t worry too much if the answer is no but you passed most of the other questions, This one is mostly because if you grew up in a Jewish/Catholic/Muslim/other closed religion household, wanting to incorporate that in your practice is ok.


  • You do not have to be religious to practice witchcraft. Your craft can exclude deity work of any kind.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask what you feel are stupid questions. If your really scared, google is a very handy tool and most blogs have that anon option for a reason. :p

Mmk, spoons are low. Feel free to add any advice you think I’m missing. I really hope this helps someone!

i doodled this super quick washington in class today because priorities

Love Always Wakes the Dragon

(and suddenly flames everywhere)

It could be worse. You do have all the luxuries befitting a princess, though one charged with treason. But a gilded cage is still a cage. And the prospect of withering away in this, the tallest tower of the Palace of Asgard, in the same place where your once-betrothed will live and marry and rule from, it’s almost too much to bear.


author: sugardaddytonystark (formerly buckysbackpackbuckle)
pairing: Thor x Jotun!Reader
word count: 4067
warnings: brat prince Thor, unprotected sex, oral sex, hair pulling, choking

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i like thinking about little things lucretia didn’t think to erase.

Julia asks how Magnus celebrated Candlenights as a kid, and he says, “Actually I’m surprised it’s apparently so universal, because I’d never heard of it before I came to Raven’s Roost!” And he says the name of a holiday Julia doesn’t recognize, and she asks where on earth he’s from. He can name his street, but for some reason, not his city.

Taako’s trying to prepare the ingredients for a meal on his show. He’s arguing with a salesman. I’m Taako from TV, he says, you can show me the secret merch. And the salesman says, sir, I told you I don’t know what the fuck cheese is, please leave.

Davenport remembers his birthday but he never brings it to attention. He doesn’t like to. He feels like he lost something important the last time it mattered, so he decides it doesn’t really matter. He’s content with his job and with the friendly cards lucretia writes every year, just 2 days off the mark (he never corrects her).

The first time Merle sees Taako in the tavern, he thinks, this guy’s got the face of a magic user. And when said wizard turns a table to beef, he feels less smug than he usually does when he gets something right. It just feels obvious.

Lucretia talks with Merle over ginkgo tea one evening. He tells her it always surprises him how authoritative she is, because she comes off as a really reserved person. “And– I don’t mean that just ‘cause you’re a woman! It’s something about your face, I think.” Lucretia assures him that no, she gets that a lot. (She’s never been told that by anyone from this world.)

Losing Time

“Losing time” is a way to describe experiences with dissociative amnesia, a symptom that’s tied to dissociative disorders, PTSD, and cPTSD. Those without a trauma history, with or without mental illness, may experience occasional minor episodes of dissociative amnesia (during splits, panic attacks, during psychotic episodes, etc). Medication issues, as well as seizure activity, brain injury, and other physical conditions can cause what appears to be dissociative amnesia. 

Losing time generally happens in one of two ways. 

“Blackouts” are when one suddenly comes to, realizing that time has passed without their noticing. One may look at the clock, and it’ll be 2 in the afternoon. Next time they look, perceiving only minutes have passed, it might be 6 in the evening. For those with DID or OSDD-1a, this may mean an alter fronted during this time. For those with DPDR, PTSD, or another related disorder, this time might simply be lost. 

More subtle dissociative amnesia presents as “gaps” in memory. These might not be noticed until one is questioned about what happened in these gaps. Having childhood gaps is very common in survivors of childhood trauma, these gaps of dissociative amnesia might be years long. Gaps in memory could be related to traumatic events or for no discernible reason. Memory repression and dissociative amnesia are related, but not the same thing- dissociative amnesia can affect memories regardless of traumatic content. 

Some people with dissociative amnesia will “remember” events that were told to them later, but not remember any feelings or sense of self from that event. They might remember “oh, I went to this person’s wedding,” but not recall how they felt, how old they were, what they did, etc. 

Dissociative amnesia, or losing time, is not the same as “zoning out.” It’s largely tied to trauma- if you experience this without any trauma history, I highly recommend you try to see a doctor to rule out dangerous physical conditions that might be affecting your memory. Severe dissociation without trauma is uncommon but possible- be sure to rule out other conditions, though! 

If you experience issues with losing time, there are things you can do to cope! For those with severe dissociative amnesia, setting a time to go off on intervals and recording events on your phone/in a notebook can help with grounding. Journaling every day can be helpful. Some medications can reduce symptoms, and trauma therapy tends to reduce dissociative symptoms all around. 

Remember, having a symptom is not necessarily tied to any diagnosis! Treating the symptom should be your first priority! Be safe, I’m available to answer questions if you have any.

SPYRO WEEK day 1: favourite game

spyro, as my son, you should know not to hurt my other sons. i was obsessed with spyro a hero’s tail when i was 12. it’s on par with the first spyro game ofc, i love both equally. ♥

The Best Sonic??

Hey, Nanite here. I’m a long-time Sonic the Hedgehog fan and am currently a mod on the @sonicpositive and @motivationalsonic blogs! Cutting to the chase, I’ve been asked by several people who my favorite ‘version’ of Sonic the Hedgehog is, since the franchise has so many different continuities to choose from. I couldn’t decide, so I’m gonna draw some Sonics (not all of them, we’d be here all day) and rate them! Starting we have:

Classic Sonic! What a guy who’s fly, a blue dude with a ‘tude– it’s the original Sonic! How could I not love him? Good and wholesome. Saves little animals. 12/10.

Archie Sonic! Boy does this guy bring back some of my best memories. Me showing off the latest issue to all the other kids in class, reading them out loud to my little brothers and trying my best to get their voices juusttt right. Tons of fun and action and some of the best characters in the whole franchise! Sad to see him go, but I have no doubt IDW Sonic will be just as way past cool! 100/10!

Modern Sonic! Fun games, great music, and a rockin’ look! This guy is all about fun and being a hero and he inspires me every day. Keep on running, Sonic. 10/10.

SatAM Sonic!! I remember being a kid, finishing an episode, and going into the woods behind my house so I could pretend to be a Freedom Fighter and protect the forest from Doctor Robotnik. Tried to dig a hole beneath an old stump so that I could retreat to my own “Knothole Village”. Didn’t get far, but boy was it fun. 15/10.

Dreamcast Sonic! (Adventure Sonic)! Boy oh boy, this guy was the BOMB! Sonic Adventure and Sonic Adventure 2 STILL are two of my favorite games. From the Chao Gardens, to the fun stages, to the absolutely unforgettable music, I think Sonic made a pretty decent transition into 3D. Open Your Heart, dudes. 11/10.

Boom Sonic. Is this the one everyone was waiting for? I sure hope so. I had lots of fun playing Sonic Boom. Yeah, it was glitchy, yeah, it was tough, but there was something incredibly charming about it. I don’t know if it was the character interactions, or the humor, or maybe it was the fact that I had someone else to play it with and it’s more enjoyable with a friend. Say what you want but I liked the game and I love the show. Boom Sonic is funny, relatable, and as always, cool. 10/10.

And last but certainly not least, Werehog Sonic. I love him with all my heart and can’t get enough of this hoggo. He’s not as fast as any of the other Sonics on this list, but his heart is just as big, if not bigger. He only looks scary!! He’s actually a big softie who loves his friends, just like any Sonic should. Sit, Stay, Roll into a ball. This Sonic is a Good Boy. 10000/10.

Annnnnnd there you have it! All the Sonics are good to me and they all have a special place in my heart. “But Nanite, what about Metal, Underground, Aosth, and Riders? What abou–” Hold up!! I intend to rate most of the Sonics I can think of, but I’ll be saving those guys for next time. Though something tells me we’ll come to a similar conclusion haha. Anyway, hope y’all liked the many Sonics! If you actually read to the end of this the surprise is that they’re all transparent and free to use!! Sonic gets a lot of flack, but hopefully this helps spread some positivity! Love ya, Sonic!! <3

N̸̶o̕r̛͠͞m͝͠a̛l̡̨ ͏̧H̛or̶o̧s̕c͠o̧̕͝pe҉̷:

Aries: Tomorrow is another day! Rest your head little thing.

Aries: Tomorrow is another day! Rest your head little thing.

Taurus: The stars see diagrams of ships. They go back centuries. Computer made, hand copied. Intricate labeled drawings of sails and engines and things you don’t recognize. Study these and learn.

Gemini: She was broken and repaired with kitchen implements. Her fingernails debone fish. Her stomach is a blast furnace. An urban legend to scare the rapists.

Cancer: What do bees know of circuitry? What do you know of circuitry? What is circuitry? What are bees? How many credits do you have left for your computer engineering degree.

Aries: Tomorrow is another day! Rest your head little thing.

Leo: The great mystery mines have not run dry. They are so deep you cant see the bottom, which is itself an excellent source of mystery. Bring a light if you want but I would advise against it.

Virgo: Ground finches have evolved to feed off of human trash. Consider what else has adapted to feed off of what you don’t need. This is beautiful.

Libra: How dare the world try to remember you? This perverted image of you cannot stand. Find the places that honor you, every book that references you. Burn them all and rest.

Scorpio: We must remember our roots. You had a d̛̲̱͙ŗ̴̥̙̗̦̣͔̕e̥͇̖̥̫̖̟̩a̷̬͓̼̲̤̫̳m̫͙̼͞ dear. To be the greatest DDR player the world has ever seen just to spite that dickhead who laughed at you in the arcade once.

Ophiuchus: To learn why your destiny is recursive, check today’s Ophiuchus horoscope.

Sagittarius: They walk along with the carnival but know they are not wearing stilts. Do not follow them under any circumstances. Enjoy your funnel cake.

A͍͓̮̳͝ṛ͍̠͕͖̠i̶̗̬͉̦̤̪̱e͏͖s̡͚̦̻: ̵͍͇̼T̟̰͉o͔̦͘m̯̺͚̕o̦̜̖̱̜͍̟r҉͍r͕̻̬o̩͕͕̞̰͈̣w̟͎̫̳̝ ̣̝̹ͅi̯̲̯s̲͚̜͔͚̞̫͞ ҉a͓͞ņ̻o͎̲͖t̺̞͈̞̜̤̼h͏̩̞̮̥̮e̱͙̪̦͔͞ͅr̝̹̳̥ ̙̮̙͖͔̳d̫͍̫̲͖̮͍a̪̻̭ͅy̩̗̣̪͙͚!͏̣̥̯̬̯ ̰̲̩R̻̼ḛ̴̤s̸̺̣̦̘̖t̻̣̪̺͎̟̰ ͔͔̹̣̟̠y̨o̶u̼̟͕r͓̬̩͚͖̖̕ͅ ̷̣̠͚h̗̘͙e͚̦̯͇̺̰á̫̤͍͕͍̤d̬͈̫̖́ ̰̰͕͙̭͔li̥̗̖͢ţ͕̮̣̱̟t͖̮̰͕̞͕l̜̤͇̫̟̀e̼̥̙̼͔ ̣̭̺͇̩͢t̲͜hi̟͡n̺͍͠g̶̭͔̞̗ͅ.̧̥͎̰͚

Capricorn: You are not being watched, but there is a possibility something will see you today. Something that values physical appearances. Wear your favorite outfit today.

Aquarius: Someone has misplaced their day. Be on the lookout for any loose days, the owner will pay dearly for its return.

Pisces: The force of a human bite is about 120 lbs. This may become relevant.

A̜rì͉̤̟̦̜͓͙e̮̝̰̝ͅs:̘̝͠ ͔̮͔T҉̤͙̹óm̛̯̤o̪̘r̶r̲̘͝o̴͍̦̭̻w͍̳͔̩͇ ̩̗̥͝i̛̹͙̮̞s͇̻͙͞ ̛̥͉̘̰̼̜a̜̣͙̘n̷̠͙̳o̳̺͇̻t̸̞͎̱̙̥̫he̠̺̩̩r̤͔̥̙͔̀ ̞̱̭͓͙͔͡d͈͈͇̱͔̗a̛͖͍̬̠̤͎͙y̟͇̠̮!̲̱̬͎̪ ̡̼͉̞͓̻̤͚R̤̹̩͉e̦̰̫s͢t̯̳͡ ̮͟y̻̟͈̗͖̬o҉̭u͢r͕ ͜h͔͚̣̠̯̣̯e̘̫̲͉̱̼͚a̗̘͉̩̮̼̫͟d̨͚̱̯̘͉ ̴̭̭͉̟ͅĺ̝̺͍̖i̴t̹̺̗t̻̮l̠͎̖͜e͏͕̥͈̫͕ͅ ̻̟̞̬͇t̤̦h͘ͅi͏͔͓̪̲͚n͈̬̩̭g̶̭̬̫̹͇̜.͍̗̦̹


͈̝̥͚an҉̳̮̹̗̣o̵͚̜̜͈̙̮th̜̲͔͕̹̕ḙ́r̳̝̕ͅ ͇d͘ay̗̥̳̣̞͘



ŕ̖̮̞͓̮̭e̢̡̦̤̦ş͍̘̪͕͕́ͅt̼̘̟͇͓̗͙̳͝ ͇̝̪̲̰͕͝y̨̛̟͎͚͍̥o͎̻̟͟ų̢̱͇̯́r̨̖̜̠͜ ̼̖̹̟̰̳̥̹͝h̢͏͉e̛̞̜̦̥͍̥̮͟a̴̘͇̲͕͘d̸̬̙͓̗

3

supergirl season one appreciation week → day four: best relationship (familial)

“I can’t promise you a life without pain and loss because pain is a part of life. It’s what makes us who we are. It is what makes you a hero. You fight every day to keep people from struggling like you have. I know you can remember, please… If you try, please… Please try, Kara. Because Earth needs Supergirl. Remember that life. With James and Winn and Hank. Your friends need you. And I need my sister!”