I think I have an unhealthy

the way tumblr talks about mental illness really bugs me tbh 

anonymous asked:

As a med student,what are your thoughts on veganism?

I’m not vegan and I’ll probably never be vegan, but I have nothing against those who are. I’m guessing you’re saying ‘as a med student’ because of the health side of things? 

Honestly, from what I know of nutrition I don’t think a vegan diet in itself is necessarily healthier than non-vegan. (Technically you could only eat crisps and be vegan.) And the fact that you can’t get vitamin B12 naturally from vegan food kinda says something. However, I think people who are vegan tend to be healthier because they’re more likely to care about their health - the average vegan doesn’t eat loads of fast food. 

But from what I know there’s nothing inherently unhealthy about meat, fish, and eggs etc. It’s what we’ve always eaten and they have nutrients + vitamins that are good for us. ALTHOUGH you shouldn’t really eat too much red meat, particularly processed red meat, because they increase the risk of bowel cancer!!

So yeah I think vegan diets can be healthy, and non-vegan diets can be healthy. But of course there other reasons for being vegan than just the ‘health’ side of things. x

anonymous asked:

I still believe in love in general,but I have a hard time believing in love for myself.My last relationship was very unhealthy and a lot of that was bc we were both v mentally ill and had the same trauma and our illnesses clashed w each other.I'm afraid tho,that if I date someone who isn't like me I'll be a burden.I feel like Im too mentally ill to ever have a stable relationship bc it causes so many interpersonal problems and Im hard to handle.Do u have any advice for moving past this mindset?

it may help to try focusing on taking things one day at a time. thinking about whether you’ll ever find love is something you can’t really control. you cannot know today, right now, whether you will find love. and you do not know if the next person you date would see you as a burden, or would be supportive.

if you are in a place where you recognize that your mental health is something you have to manage and that not taking care of yourself can affect future relationships, you are a lot more prepared to tackle this issue than you think. there are people who don’t even recognize that they have to manage their mental health.

my advice isn’t to move past the mindset. because the reality is that your mental illness is something you will not just get over, but rather something you have to learn to cope with. my advice is to deal with this. go to counseling, speak to a doctor, build those skills to help you manage life with your mental illness. think about the kind of relationship you can handle, think about what a healthy relationship looks like. you won’t be able to predict your love life. but you can prepare for it. you can prepare for life, and if love comes you’ll be prepared for that too

Neurodivergent people in love are revolutionary.

From the time we’re young, we’re told that we are too stupid or crazy to be loved. I was 10 years old when I had my first real crush, and I was isolated and called a stalker by all the boys in my grade because I followed the guy around in the playground and didn’t understand his boundaries. I was 10 years old. That expectation and label followed me throughout all of my early teens, with me thinking that I couldn’t have a crush without being a stalker.

People with cognitive issues, psychosis, and personality disorders (particularly cluster B) are repeatedly told that we’re destined to be abusers in our relationships. We see people with our symptoms in media portrayed as abusers or perverts, and it’s a silent message to us that we’re unlovable, despite the fact that we’re actually more likely to be the victims of abuse.

I see relationships in media called unhealthy and abusive because one or both of the characters are coded as mentally ill. I hear people say “don’t stick your dick in crazy”. I see @dateagirlwhosuggestion and @dateaboysuggestions receive asks berating them for suggesting to date people like me, saying that it’s dangerous. I see developmentally disabled people being the undesirable joke that not even a loser would consider dating. I’ve had enough.

I’ve been told that I’m too insane and mentally ill to date. I’ve had rumors spread that I masturbate to serial killers. Time and again I see ND people in love being treated like we’re abusive, perverts, or too “far-gone” or “slow” to be in a relationship. But people are wrong. Being mentally ill or developmentally disabled does not mean you’re unlovable or abusive. Our love isn’t creepy. It’s revolutionary.

So to everyone that says that people with BPD are destined to be abusive, or that someone with a fixation/favourite person/depended/misunderstanding of boundaries is a stalker, or that developmentally disabled or psychotic people don’t know how to love, or that you shouldn’t date someone who is mentally ill: fuck you. You don’t deserve our love.

Before I do any more analysis, the general impression I got (and I think we can all agree) was that whatever went down at the bottom of the sea for almost a year messed both of them up, and their perceptions of what a relationship should be like are pretty skewed. 

What Lapis did at the end shows that having a support network really is important. She’s taking strides to both recognise she was hurt in an unhealthy relationship and recognise she did some hurting too.

Jasper’s been completely alone this entire time. No one to tell her this was unhealthy; no one to be critical of her actions; no one to stop her from chasing after Lapis. Everything about Jasper so far shows us she wants to be big and strong and fusion gave her that, but it wasn’t healthy. Both of them, at one point or another, were using each other. 

Jasper is doing a lot of harmful things, both to herself and others. She’s desperate to get back on the fusion train because she thinks there’s nothing else for her. And she did a lot of hurtful things to get there, like tossing people around, smacking Steven, not listening to Lapis’ saying “no.” She’s not the same Jasper we saw in The Return, who was self-assured and calculating.

So I’m really glad that Lapis said “no.” She was tempted to go back to that toxic fusion. It’s like experiencing withdrawal from a drug. It’s difficult to leave a relationship when it feels as though you’ve shown everything to the other person. From her point of view, they know so much of you now, what happens when you leave? How do you start again? It was really hard for that “no” to come out, and I respect that she overcame her struggle to jump back into being Malachite. And I like how it came from her and not Steven. She spoke for herself, she made the decision to step away from this and start healing.

But right now, I think they do need time apart from one another. It’s easy to fall back into the same patterns of an unhealthy relationship when the other person is right there. I do think though, that Jasper needs someone to explain things and to make Jasper wake up as well. Lapis had Steven for that, and to an extent she also had the gems. Having no one, isolating whom we view as the “bad person” doesn’t help them change rehabilitate, because they reinforce their own behaviour. If we want Jasper to stop undertaking these kinds of actions, that’s really something to consider.

I’m sure I have more to say about this, but it’s something I still have to put into words.

Things that need to be left in 2015
  • 3rd wave Feminism - Seriously that shit needs to go.
  • Otherkin- Sad and pathetic but very very funny.
  • Trigger warnings and safe spaces - You’re an adult , act like it you will not be coddled.
  • Male tears and making fun of men for having emotions - Do I really need to explain?
  • Endorsing obesity and a unhealthy life style. - I’m talking to you pro fat community.
  • Being PC- learn to take a joke not everything is offensive.
  • Doxxing- MY private info is MY private info not the worlds. Grow up.
  • Bullying artist to the point of attempted suicide - Seriously what makes you think it’s okay to do this to someone? 
  • Shoplifting community - You’re not stealing for survival, there for you shouldn’t be stealing.
  • SJW’s - Once again must I explain. 
  • Self diagnosing - If your not a health care professional then don’t make medical diagnoses.
  • Rape culture- It doesn’t exist , no one promotes rape, our culture doesn’t promote it.
  • Yes all men - I’m looking at you sjw and feminist . Its just stereotyping men and degrading them. And I though your movements were about equality?

i love roadtrips and I think about these way more than i probably should so
also these are probably gonna be more modern ok cool leggo

-never trust soda with the aux cord
-or two bit he once played all the spongebob songs for three hours
-pony is the person that divides the space in the the car by the inch….. Like “no Johnny that’s your side, you’ve crossed my side by .5 centimeters back the fuck up”
-they play the yellow car game, Darry is the long term champ
-they also play a game to see who can get the most semi trucks to honk at them by doing the arm thing (like when u move it up and down and ur hand is in a fist u get me???) Steve is winning at this one and has successfully woken everyone up in the dead of night three times
-darry loves getting snow globes !!
-pony aka the mother fucker who “didn’t have to go pee” but twenty minutes later has to and makes everyone so mad
-everyone switches off for driving, except Dallas because he is the shittiest driver E V E R
-two bit telling everyone he’s from England and having a really convincing accent; a lot of times the rest of the gang will join him
-they’ve literally gotten so many people’s numbers because of it
-the gang is generally more happy and all together because Darry finally got off work and pony/two/Johnny is out of school and no one is stressed!!
-they have two rules: when visiting someplace new, always try one of their milkshakes (and don’t give soda the aux seriously don’t )
-bucket hats
-“we went to ____ and all we got was this lousy ____”
-they get one of those drawings of themselves done u know the cartoony ones with like chalk or something idk what they’re called but
-johnny making sure they hit all the tourist spots so they get the full experience™ -everyone mocking the gps

Khloe: Looking back at pictures of myself I didn’t realize at the time how unhealthy my lifestyle actually was. People love to call me the fat one but as weird as it sounds I still don’t think I would consider myself fat back then. Definitely overweight and unhealthy, yes. About two years ago I decided to turn to fitness as a form of therapy and as a stress reliever. I started slow and eventually I started working out 4 to 5 days a week. We all have to start somewhere and doing something is better than nothing at all. Start small so you don’t get discouraged and give up. Remember it is all about consistency. There are no quick fixes if you want long-term results. Working out is a huge part of my life now. I genuinely enjoy sweating out my frustrations and living a healthier life. My workouts are not all about vanity. They are about clarity for my mind and soul. We all have different journeys in life, make sure your journey is for you and you alone. Remember in the end the turtle won the race. Slow and steady. dedication and tenacity. 💋

3.11.16 this mornings thoughts:
I keep getting so many constant questions in my ask on tumblr of girls asking me if i lost weight going vegan, how much i eat to look the way i do, how they can look like me, etc. and there are honestly only 2 things I can say to answer this:
1. The reason I look the way I do is the result of 8 months of over excercising, restricting myself from certain foods, under eating, & putting my body through hell to get the desired “thigh gap” and “6 pack”. These people sending me asks on tumblr may think I have the ideal “perfect” body, but what these people don’t know is that I’m currently trying to gain weight since I’m severely underweight and unhealthy. Don’t try to change your body to look like somebody else’s, and nobody can tell you what you “should” be eating, just listen to your body and it will tell you what you need and when to eat it. everyone is fucking different so stop trying to eat exactly what somebody else eats just to look like them.
2. The vegan lifestyle is NOT about weight loss, and that is not what you should be focusing on. You should not be debating going vegan because you are worried if you will “lose weight or gain weight”. It gets me angry that people are so self obsessed and that all they care about is how they look on the outside, rather than giving a shit about how what they eat affects the world around them. Veganism is about compassion. It’s about eating food without fucking violence. It’s about the belief that all beings are created equal and should be treated equal. It’s about saving our beautiful planet that the human population takes advantage of and for granted. When eating an abundance of plant based food, your body will naturally adapt to the size it’s supposed to be at, so if you needed to lose weight you will. If you needed to gain weight than you will. Instead of focusing so much on how foods make you look, focus on how they make you feel. Because trust me, when you feel good you will fucking look good too.

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I think my friend is in an abusive relationship. What can I do?

Someone asked us:

I have a friend who I think is stuck in an abusive relationship but doesn’t realize it yet. How can I try to help her? Without alienating her or making it seem like I’m attacking him?

If your friend isn’t being treated with respect, is being controlled, or is living under the threat of violence, her relationship is unhealthy and abusive. A friend like you can be a lifesaver.

It can be hard to realize that you’re in an unhealthy or abusive relationship, and even harder to admit it.  But don’t let that stop you from telling your friend that you’re concerned about her.

Listen and be supportive. When she talks about bad things in her relationship, tell her she deserves to be happy and validate her feelings. Remind her why she’s great and deserves love and respect in a relationship. Do things she likes to do to show her what it’s like to be around someone who supports and loves her. It’s a good sign of your friendship that she’s already told you some of what’s going on. If she opens up to you again about abusive or unhealthy behavior, remind her that what’s going on is not her fault, and that no one deserves to be treated that way in a relationship.

You don’t need to “attack” her partner. In fact, it’s better to keep the focus on your friend as much as possible. It’s super important that she still feels okay talking to you about it, and that she doesn’t feel judged by you if she’s not ready to break it off.

If your friend chooses to break up with her abuser, she may need to come up with a safety plan. You can help her with that.

Be prepared for your friend to not break up with him right away, or for them to break up and get back together again. It can be hard to leave any romantic relationship behind — even the harmful ones. It’s really common for someone to break up with their abusive partner and get back together several times before the break up sticks. So if they do break up, support her and remind her that she deserves to be happy and respected in her relationship, and avoid proactively bashing her ex. That way if they do get back together, she’ll still feel comfortable coming to you.

Get more info about healthy vs. unhealthy relationships at Love is Respect, plus more tips for helping people in unhealthy or abusive relationships.

-Emily at Planned Parenthood

The most frequently asked question I get is: “How do you find all these readings you go to?” I think the answer many people want is: “There’s this great website called EveryFreeNYCReading.biz” or “I got a microchip implanted that tells me where to go at 7pm.” But the super sad true story is: “I’m online. Like, all the time.”

I don’t think everyone should spend an unhealthy amount of time online like me, so here’s a list of places that host (mostly) free readings in New York City. If you find that you like a place, sign up for their newsletter and follow them on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, etc. to stay updated about upcoming events.

Places/events that usually aren’t free are marked with an asterisk (though many have student discounts).




Jersey City

Barnes & Noble:

Organizations and Museums



Reading Series
A new reading series pops up every day, so this list is hardly definitive – these are just some of my favorites.

Festivals, Conferences, and Awards


Add more in the comments – what am I missing?

It’s the most terrible thing thinking about the idea that most girls’ natural instinct is to look at others as their main competition. This has somehow been ingrained in us since we were little girls – ‘She’s more competition for you than he is over there,’ when really, when you go out into the real world and you’re trying to accomplish things, men and women are your competitors.
But when girls are thinking too much about getting boys to like them or getting a boyfriend, I think that is when this natural competitiveness instinct kicks in and they start to look at other girls as their competition. It’s so unhealthy. I think having grown up, lived through it, having experienced it and having felt that way about other girls at certain points of my life, I now look around and I just love girls. I respect girls and admire girls far more than any of the men around me. You have to stick together and, whether you label yourself as a feminist or not, it’s important that we address equal rights.