Keep Your Place
Boys will be boys, and he’s only mean to you because he likes you. Don’t get mad when he catcalls you; don’t you know how to take a compliment? A girl who looks like you should take what she can get. And a girl who looks like that? Well, she’s only getting what she’s asking for. Let me show you how to dress so you don’t look like her. Surely you weren’t planning on actually leaving the house wearing that. Cover your shoulders, darling, that’s far too much skin you’re showing. Your skirt is way too short; why don’t you go put on a nice pair of pants? Oh, wait, not those ones. They’re too tight. No, not that shirt either - too low cut. You’re just asking for it leaving the house like that. But…hold on a minute…jeans and a t-shirt? Girls are supposed to be hot, not look like they just rolled out of bed. Surely you can do better than that. Spice it up a little, honey. You’ll never get a guy looking like that. Oh, here, let me show you how to wear your makeup - how to make yourself beautiful.
Everyone wants a girl who looks like a doll, but no one wants a girl who wears enough makeup to actually look like a perfect porcelain angel. You have to look natural, but never makeup-less. Oh, and don’t forget to style your hair; they can’t see you with even a strand out of place. Wait. Hang on. Is that a new haircut I see? Why so short? God, you’re not gay, are you? Are you trying to get mistaken for a boy? Grow it out. You’re not feminine enough. No boy wants a girl who’s that masculine. Speaking of which, shouldn’t you have a boyfriend by now? If you’re not careful, you’ll end up alone. You don’t want that, do you? Okay, no, stop. I take it back. Now you just look desperate. Everyone knows he has to hit on you first. Don’t you know anything?
Hey now, hold up there, young lady! Just where do you think you’re going so late at night? Go out alone like that and we might never see you again. Haven’t you learned by now that you’re just not safe on your own once the sun goes down? There’s pepper spray hooked on your keyring for a reason. Oh, you’re going to a party? Make sure you never let your drink out of your sight, or it might end up being the last one you ever have. But surely not every guy is like that, right? Surely you won’t be the girl who becomes just another unsolved case - a file shoved into the bottom of a drawer somewhere. Surely you couldn’t possibly be that unlucky. But don’t people say the same thing in a game of Russian Roulette? You don’t call the shots, love, and if you don’t follow these rules, the world might just chew you up and spit you out. You might end up being just another girl who couldn’t learn to stay in line and keep her place.