I have a birthday party to go to

Birthday Dinner (Jughead x Reader)

Prompt: I had an idea. Could you do Jughead x Reader where it’s jugs birthday and he wants to invite her over for dinner but he lives with Archie and Fred so he’s embarrassed and goes and asks for Fred’s permission if he can have his girlfriend over for his birthday and fill in the rest idk if I made this clear enough!

A/N: I changed the idea just a bit! SO glad I finally finished this. Hopefully you’ll still like it xx 

Masterlist

Birthday Dinner (Jughead x Reader)

It was Jug’s birthday on Friday.

You wanted to do something with him but he told you that Archie and his dad were going to throw him a dinner party/barbeque.

He felt bad but you assured him that you two could do something before or after his birthday.

You two have been secretly dating for the past three months so obviously you weren’t expecting to go.

Especially since you lived on the other side of town and went to a different school.

What you didn’t plan for was Jug to ask Fred Andrews if you could come.

Keep reading

Had a couple of odd dreams:

-Ended up caring for a stray cat that was very sweet, but made entirely out of stone, and ate only pages from books.

-A silent man woke me up in the wee hours of the morning and handed me his phone opened to Google Maps. He wanted me to drive him to a location over an hour away. I went ahead and did it.

-Met a lonely witch’s daughter, who invited me to her birthday party. I was the only guest. Celebrations included cutting a symbolic umbilical cord that hung from the ceiling and was made out of braided steel fibers. “I have this party game every year and never win,” she said. “But I’ve never had help before…”
Flash-forward several hours later, we were both exhausted and fell asleep on the floor with our hands entwined. We woke when she heard her mother coming home - a blood-curdling shriek from the night. She urged me to go. “You have to leave now! If she finds you here, she’ll eat you!”
“Is this why you never have party guests?” I asked bitterly.
I escaped, but it was implied that I had continued interactions with the witch and her daughter - more narrow escapes, to the point that I got to know them pretty well. I completed some task for the witch and she rewarded me with light… “Here you are, young man! A lightbulb from your family circus that tragically burnt down, from which you have no souvenirs to remember your family!” My heart leapt, because that was apparently my backstory. “Too bad it’s broken! Ha ha ha! But don’t worry, I’ve got you covered…” The witch retrieved a fat half-burnt cigar from behind her ear and stuffed it into my mouth. She struck a match and held it to my face. “There! I promised you a light, and a light you have received!”
I coughed and spat the cigar to the ground. “I don’t smoke!”
“You don’t? Your loss, then. I fulfilled my end of the bargain.”

Later, I was in the witch’s house arguing with her about how scary she actually was. “I’m sorry,” I said, as thorny vines grew out of the floor and slowly encased my body. “You’re just not that scary. At first, sure, but once I got to know you? You try to kill me all the time. It’s not surprising anymore, and I know your heart’s not really in it.”
“I’m literally transforming you into a tree right now,” she said indignantly. “You should be screaming in fear!”
I shrugged. “Trees aren’t so bad. I could probably learn a lot from being a tree. Anyway, I know you’ll just turn me back when you get bored, so….”

shiv

///


November 14th.
In the coffee shop,
the man in the
Make America Great Again hat
smiles at me, so I take this
as an invitation.


“Pardon me, but I have to ask—
do you think Trump’s
ideologies keep every person
in this country safe?“


He doesn’t hesitate.


“Ma’am, I can’t get wrapped up
in identity politics, all I can
worry about is how
I’m going to feed my girls.”


///


At my 40th birthday party,
an acquaintance asks
why we have “so much
Mexican art in the house.”

“It might be because I’m Mexican,” I say.

“No,” he laughs, “you’re not Mexican.”

“Yes. I am.”

“No,” he continues, reassuringly,
“and if you are, you’re only, maybe, 17%.“

The winter air stiffens between us.
An old, familiar pain.


///


There was a time when I
would have thanked him.


The early years,
when I wanted only to pass,
to rid myself of my last name—
the dead giveaway,
its muddy lineage


crawl out from the burying shame
that held me down every time
my father picked me up
from school in our shitty car,
his bushy mustache
& brown face
magnified by the sun.


///


A local white woman
posts a photo of her new tattoo:
a Mayan god etched eternal
on her flesh. When I point out
the disrespect, she assures me
she speaks Spanish fluently,
spent three years
in South America.


For the next six hours,
I argue with her friends.
They demand I quit being so
divisive. Judgemental. Close-minded.


“We have a racist running for President,
and you’re complaining about a tattoo?”
asks the white boy, who spray paints
murals all over this city
with impunity.


O, to be permitted the luxury
of only worrying about one thing at a time.


O, to be white in America,
to wake up knowing every god is your god.


///


When you never see yourself,
you search for yourself all the time.


You know the white girl
in the sombrero isn’t you.
The bro dude in Calavera makeup
isn’t either, not the ponchos
and glued on mustaches,
not the lowrider Chevy
in the Disney movie
or the hoochie-coochie
sex pot on the Emmy
award-winning television show.


Maybe you are only this:


the scorched bird pulled
from the chimney,
covered in soot.
Not the actual bird,
its velvet sack
of jigsaw’d bones,
but the feeling
of recognition.


The ash of knowing.


///


A white comedian tells this joke:
“I used to date Hispanics,
but now I prefer consensual.”


The audience laughs.
And you do, too.
Until the punchline hardens,
translates into a stone
in your throat.


You swallow it, like you always do.


You don’t change the channel,
but you also can’t remember
a single joke she tells after that.


A few months later, the comedian’s career
blows up. She’s so real. So edgy.
Such a hardcore feminist.
When someone writes an essay on
her old stand-up routines—
noting her blindspot when it comes to race,


her response is:


“It is a joke and it is funny.
I know that because people laugh at it.”


///


If two Mexicans are in a car, who is driving?
A police officer.


How do you starve a Mexican?
Put their food stamps in their work boots.


What’s the difference between a Mexican and an elevator?
One can raise a child.


What do you call a Mexican baptism?
Bean dip


How do you stop a Mexican from robbing your house?
Put a help wanted sign in the window.


What do you call a Mexican driving a BMW?
Grand theft auto


What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed


What do you call a building full of Mexicans?
Jail


How do you keep Mexicans from stealing?
Put everything of value on the top shelf.


What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running downhill?
A mudslide.


Why don’t Mexicans play Hide ’n Seek?
No one will look for them.


What does a Mexican get for Christmas?
Your TV.


What do you call the Arizona man shot to death
by his white neighbor, screaming, “Go back to Mexico!”
Juan Varela


///


November 29th.
For weeks, I’ve avoided
eye contact with strangers.
My face is a closed curtain.
My mouth, the most
decorated knife.
I pay for groceries,
grab the receipt &
let my half-hearted
thank yous trail like smoke.
I no longer want to see
who refuses to see me.


Anyone is everyone.


///


December 1st.
I keep waking up.
There isn’t anyone
white enough to stop me.


Pantomime the living until
the body remembers:
wicked bitch. Bloodwhirl.
Patron Saint of the Grab Back.


Still. Still. Still. Still. Still. Still here.


///


I etch my own face upon my wicked flesh.
I am my own devastating god.

 


Rachel McKibbens, Dec. 2016

3

AN ANGEL AMONG US:

Armani Crews, who turned 6 earlier this month, had been begging her parents for “a few months” to feed homeless people in her community, but her parents thought “she was joking,” her mother, Artesha Crews, told ABC News.

“I said, ‘OK, we’ll make some sandwiches,’ to which Armani said, 'No. I want the same thing we’d have at my birthday party,’” her mother recalled.

Even when her father, Antoine, informed her that if she wanted to go through with this, she wouldn’t get a birthday gift, the girl, whose birthday was March 5, persisted.

So the Chicago family spent about $300 buying food to deliver to homeless people in the city’s East Garfield Park neighborhood. They purchased chicken, fish, spaghetti, corn, green beans, mashed potatoes, rolls, cake, cookies, fruit and water.

After Armani mentioned her plan at the family’s local church, congregation members donated other items to create care packages for the homeless. Each care package included a toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, hand sanitizer and a snack, such as a granola bar.

Armani’s birthday party was a success, with the family feeding more than 125 people who gathered.
In a statement, the kindergarten student told ABC News, “It was nice to be nice.”

Her mother added, “She was excited. She was happy. Everybody was being fed. …One of the gentleman said he hadn’t had a hot meal in a long time.”

Now the 6-year-old wants to host another community meal for the homeless. Her mother said the family plans to return to the park “within the next couple of weeks.”

via: http://abcnews.go.com/Lifestyle/year-feeds-homeless-throwing-birthday-party/story?id=46079836

Grown up birthday parties are so dull and boring like no I don’t wanna go to a bar late at night and drink and dance in a place full of strangers, I want to spend an afternoon having a nice picnic in your garden with our other friends, I want to pick flowers while we tell each other small secrets, I want to go on swings and roll in the grass, I want to eat candies and watch the sunset sitting somewhere quiet. That’s my kind of party.

Seventeen going to Dino’s Birthday Party: A Dino Birthday Special

Episode 11: Where Seventeen tries to plan and prepare for Dino’s birthday by splitting up into their units to get things done.

A/N: I may or not have been trying to stall time to have this special posted as the 11th episode cause you know 11 feb is chan’s birthday haha okay im sorry my brain stopped functioning and it this special somehow ended up being episode eleven… 


Jeonghan: “Okay children we need to do something special for my baby! He’s finally turning 5!”

Scoups:

Scoups: “Um Chan’s gonna be 18 what are you talking about?”

Jeonghan: “We need FIVE candles for his cake, we need FIVE presents, we need FIVE balloons, we need to buy five of everything because he is FIVEEEE!!!”

Joshua: “I love you Jeonghan but I think you have problems with facing the fact that Dino is growing up…”

Jeonghan:

Hoshi: “I think it’s time to let go of that fact that he isn’t 5 years old anymore”

Vernon: “The last time I checked… Chan hasn’t been 5 years old in let’s see… about THIRTEEN YEARS?!?!”

Jeonghan: “My baby is FIVEEEE!!!”

Seungkwan: “This is absurd, you guys didn’t do anything for my birthday… this is unfair! WHAT IS THIS INJUSTICE?!”

Seungkwan: “I TURNED 18 BEFORE THAT CHILD DID”

Jeonghan: “HE IS A BABY NOT A CHILD”

The8: “Your birthday passed?”

Jun: “I thought Seungkwan’s birthday’s in December”

Woozi: “No that’s Joshua’s birthday”

Jun: “Then when’s Seungkwan’s birthday?”

Seungkwan: “F-”

Joshua: “February?”

Vernon: “No cursing on Dino’s birthday it’s bad luck for the birthday boy”

Jeonghan: “You mean birthday baby”

Seungkwan: “Who cares?!?!?! It’s Dino that’ll have bad luck NOT ME and my birthday for your information is in January!”

Woozi: “No one asked for when your birthday was”

Seungkwan: “UGH fine and anyway Vernon you curse all the time…”

Vernon: “Gangsta-sol rests on birthdays, on birthdays I sing happy songs and give presents”

Joshua: “That sounds more like Santa Claus”

Jeonghan: “Okay attention to the less beautiful human beings, please gather before me”

Wonwoo: “Is hyung the birthday party planner?”

Jun: “Yeah he thinks no one can do a better job than he can…”

Jeonghan: “Okay so we are going to split up into our units to split the tasks, the hip hop unit will be going to buy the cake and present, the vocal unit will be decorating the house and the performance unit will be stalling time and making sure that Dino doesn’t come home”

Mingyu: “Why do we have to do the errands? You always give us the tougher ones…” *pouts*

Jeonghan: “Because Dino is my baby and Jeonghan the Angel says so!”

Mingyu: “Wha-”

Jeonghan: “and also because my hair is superior”

Scoups: “Don’t fight with Jeonghan, you’ll never win if he brings his hair into the fight”

Mingyu:

Mingyu: “Fine but we are stopping by KFC before we come home”

Scoups: “Okay deal”

Mingyu: “and also the famous bakery”

Scoups: “Alright, we have to get Chan’s birthday cake anyways”

Mingyu: “and the candy store!”

Scoups: “I guess we can get Chan some candy for his birthday right?”

Mingyu: “AND AND AND the pancake and waffles cafe!!”

Wonwoo: “Um Mingyu I think you are getting too carried away…”

Scoups: “… It’s okay if we have a slight detour right?”

Mingyu: “AND POPCORN!”

Scoups:

Scoups: “Now you’re just being greedy”

Mingyu: “POPPPPCORNNNN!!!”

Jun: “Is this your birthday or Dino’s?”

Mingyu: “Mine”

Seungkwan: “You mean mine since y’all never even bothered to celebrate mine?!?!”

Mingyu: “NO it’s MAH birthday since I’m gonna get some cake!”

Seungkwan: “BACK OFF MINGYU ITS MY BIRTHDAY”

Mingyu: “OH YEAH? WE’LL SEE WHO GETS TO BLOW OUT THE CANDLESSSS!!!”

Jeonghan: “SHUT UP ITS MY BABY’S BIRTHDAY! DON’T YOU BOTH DARE RUIN THIS FOR HIM OR ELSE I WILL SKIN YOU TWO ALIVE AND SELL YOUR SKINS AND USE IT AS MY CARPET!”


*on the way to the toy shop with the hip hop unit*

Mingyu: “I hate Seungkwan… he’s trying to steal my birthday…”

Scoups: “Okay ONE, your birthday is in April. TWO, it’s neither yours nor Seungkwan’s birthday, it’s DINO’s. THREE, we are already going to all the places you want to go so plea-“

Mingyu: “OHHH CAKE!” *runs to the bakery’s display window”

Scoups: “annnnddd I guess we’ll be buying Chan’s birthday cake first then” *sighs*

Mingyu: “CAN I EAT IT?”

Vernon: “No, it’s just for display, it’s not even real, it’s just made out of styr-“

Mingyu: *opens mouth*

Vernon: “Mingyu you can’t eat Styrofoam!”

Mingyu: “IT’S CAKE I’M GONNA EAT IT!”

Vernon: “IT’S NOT!” *attempts to take the display cake away*

Mingyu: “GET YOUR OWN CAKE VERNON THIS IS MINEEEEE!!!”

Vernon: “I DON’T WANT YOUR DUMB ASS CAKE I’M TRYING TO SAVE YOUR LIFE MAN!”

Mingyu: “IF YOU WANT TO SAVE ME THEN YOU SHOULD LET ME EAT THIS CAKE SO I WON’T DIE OF STRAVATION!”

Mingyu: *takes a bite*

Vernon: “Oh my god”

Mingyu: *chokes and collapses*

Wonwoo: “MINGYU!”

Scoups: “I knew this was going to happen someday”

Wonwoo: “Someone save Mingyu!!”

Vernon: “Okay hang on, let me google how to save someone who is choking on styrofoam”

Wonwoo: “Are you serious with me now?”

Vernon: “Why am I not getting any reception?!?!” *hits phone*

Mingyu: *coughs out white foam*

Wonwoo: “COUPS HYUNG!!!”

Scoups: “Hold on, hold on, I’m buying Dino’s cake, if I don’t buy it Jeonghan will either nag at me every single day until my ear bleeds and I die because of excessive bleeding or he will just take a knife and stab me until I die. And just between you and me, I think I rather have the latter”

Wonwoo: “But if you don’t do something now, MINGYU’S GONNA DIEEEE”

Scoups: “YEAH YEAH GIVE ME A MOMENT WONWOO”

Mingyu: *CHOKEESSSS*

Wonwoo: “AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES ABOUT MINGYU?”

Mingyu: *nods head*

Vernon: “okay for once google was useless”

Wonwoo: “HELLO IS THIS THE HOSPITAL MY FRIEND IS CHOKING ON STYROFOAM CAN YOU- WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT IT ISN’T AN EMERGENCY? HELLO? HELLO??? THIS IS AN EMERGENCY DID YOU JUST HANG UP ON MY CALL???!!!”

Mingyu: “W-won-woo”

Wonwoo: “Yes Mingyu?” *crying*

Mingyu: “I-I don’t think… I’m going to make it…” *chokes*

Wonwoo: “Don’t say that! You’re gonna live! I won’t let you dieeee!”

Mingyu: “Wonwoo…. If I die…”

Wonwoo: “Yes?” *cries harder*

Mingyu: “Please bring lots of food to my funeral”

Wonwoo: “Anything for you Mingyu, I’m sorry you had to leave this way…” *hugs gyu tightly on the floor*

Mingyu: *closes eyes*

Wonwoo: “NO MINGYU OMG DON’T DIE ON ME! THERE WERE SO MANY THINGS THAT I HAVEN’T TOLD YOU! YOU CAN’T LEAVE ME!”

Mingyu: “G-go-goodbye Wonwoo….”

Wonwoo: “I can’t believe… he’s…. gone….” *SOBS*

Scoups: “Oh look, they sell donuts here too”

Mingyu: *gets up* “WHERE?!?!”

Scoups: “Just joking, alright boys let’s go”

Wonwoo:

Mingyu: “B-but I came back from the dead for donuts….”

Vernon: “They said to wait for the person to cough first and if the person’s nails and lips starts to turn blue then you can stand behind the person and put your arms around his waist and make a fist with your hand and place it above his navel and then- “

Scoups: “He’s not choking anymore Hansol…”

Vernon: “Oh”

Wonwoo: “My life is a lie”


*meanwhile at the dorm with the vocal unit*

Jeonghan: “I’m going to blow up the balloons, Joshua and Woozi, you two will hang up the banner and posters, DK and Seungkwan can you set up the Karaoke set and games?”

Joshua: *grabs banner from the floor*

Joshua: “Woozi can you stop lying on the sofa and help me with this banner?”

Woozi: “Sure”

Joshua:

Joshua: “I’m waiting for you Woozi….”

Woozi: “Yeah continue to wait then”

Joshua: “Woozi I can’t hang this banner up alone!”

Woozi: “I’ll come help you as soon as Jeonghan cuts his hair”

Joshua:

Joshua: “That’s never happening…”

Woozi: “And so is me helping you hang that banner” *smiles*

Woozi: “I’m very glad we had this talk Joshua” *pats Joshua on the back and walks into bedroom*

Joshua: “Well first he forgets about my existence in the vocal unit and now this”

DK: “What games did Jeonghan hyung write down?”

Seungkwan: “According to this list…. We’re gonna play… hide and seek, musical chairs… and pin the tail on the donkey?”

DK: “What is this? A kid’s party?!”

Seungkwan: “DID YOU FORGET THAT HE THINKS DINO IS FIVE?”

DK:

DK: “In that case, that donkey better not be me”

Seungkwan: “That actually… doesn’t sound too bad” *evil plots*

DK: “Oh you know what? We should set up the Karaoke set first” *takes console out of the dusty box*

Seungkwan: “EW THE DUST”

DK: “It’s grosser than Mingyu’s snot bubbles”

Seungkwan:

DK: “Yeah you don’t want to know Kwan… you don’t want to know…”

Seungkwan: “Okay question”

Seungkwan: “Do I plug in the pink, blue or yellow plug into the TV?”

DK: “That’s a good question…. You know what? Let’s just try it all”

Seungkwan: *plugs the blue one in*

Seungkwan: “Nope not the blue one” *yanks it out*

Seungkwan: “Pink one?”

TV: *sparks up and makes hissing noises*

Seungkwan: “OKAY OKAY HOLY CRAP ITS NOT THE PINK ONE!!!” *unplugs pink one*

Joshua: “Hannie…. Can you get Woozi to do something? I still haven’t put up any posters”

Jeonghan: “Jihoon! Can you put up ONE poster please?”

Woozi: “No”

Jeonghan: “I see that you haven’t cleaned up your room since a week ago when I told you to, and also you haven’t been writing or composing any songs what have you been doing in your room? It’s becoming a pig sty, oh god have you been eating pizza in this room?! I told you to clean it up-“

Woozi: “Okay! Okay! what do you want me to do?!”

Jeonghan: “Help Joshie with the posters”

Woozi: *sighs*

DK: “ALL DONE”

Seungkwan: “LETS SEE IF ITS WORKING PROPERLY THEN” *switches it on*

DK: “Won’t Jeonghan scream at us?”

Seungkwan: “Oopsy too late” *clicks song*

*song starts*

DK: “PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME UP!”

Seungkwan: “I WANT YOU TO PICK ME UP!”

DK: “PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME”

Seungkwan: *dances to Pick Me*

DK: “I WANT YOU TO PICK ME-”

Seungkwan: *lets go of microphone and hits the TV screen*

DK:

Seungkwan: “oops”

DK: “Omg you broke the TV Seungkwan BOO”

Seungkwan: “I said sorry!”

DK: “NO you said oops”

Seungkwan: “Well oops means sorry!”

DK: *pushes kwan*

DK: “oops”

Seungkwan: “DID YOU JUST PUSH ME?”

DK: “I said oops which means sorry”

Seungkwan: *pushes seokmin making him knock over a glass over water and spilling it onto the karaoke console*

DK: “They are gonna freak out, both the karaoke console and the TV are fried”

Seungkwan: “Well it’s not our fault… it’s Jeonghan’s for putting two irresponsible kids to such difficult tasks”

DK: “Now the problem is… how and where shall we hide this?”

DK & Seungkwan: *looks at each other 

DK & Seungkwan: *quietly turns the tv off and puts everything into the store room*

Joshua: O.O

Joshua: “What the heck is that?!”

Woozi: “A dinosaur poster with Michael Jackson’s head on the Dinosaur’s body, I call it Michael Roarson”

Jeonghan: “Genius”

Woozi: “Dino likes Michael Jackson and he likes dinosaurs, so why not combine it into one and it’ll be the best poster of the century!”

Jeonghan: “You’re gonna give the child nightmares”

Woozi: “Yes! It’ll finally scare him enough so he’ll stop talking about Michael Jackson and I can sell them away and make tons of money, now step two of my plan is to find out where Chan keeps his limited edition MJ items”

Jeonghan: “Did you say something Jihoon?”


*meanwhile with the performance unit*

Dino: “Where have you guys been???”

Jun: “Walking?”

Dino: “You three said you wanted to watch this movie and told me to go buy it at 8 in the morning and which by the way only opens at 10am, I waited 2 hours just to get the ticket and another 2 hours for you all to walk HERE!!”

Hoshi: “Sorry Chan, we were busy listening to Jeongh-“

The8: *elbows hoshi*

Hoshi: “I mean listening to Jeonghan talk about his hair” *awkward laughs*

The8: “How about we treat to popcorn and snacks”

Hoshi: “You know since its your b-“

The8: *steps of hoshi’s feet*

Dino: “My what?”

Hoshi: “Owwieee Minghao!”

The8: “Sorry I thought I saw a bug and I wanted to kill it”

Dino: “Hyungs… you are acting weirdly…”

Jun: “My boy, when have you not seen us act normally?”

Dino: “You have a point there”

The8: “Dinosaur gummies for Chan!” *hands him a packet*

Dino: “I DON’T KNOW WHAT IS BETTER, THAT IT’S GUMMIES OR THAT IT’S SHAPED LIKE DINOSAURS” *hugs packet*

Hoshi: “Can I have one?”

Dino: “NO”

Hoshi: “Selfish brat I bought that for you! Do you think you’re the king just because its your bir-“

The8: *pours his cup of coke onto hoshi*

Hoshi: “AHHHHHHH IT’SSS COLLDDDDD”

The8: “Oops it just slipped out of my hands”

Hoshi: “Onto my head?!?!”

The8: “Yeah”

Jun: “Okay Chan let’s just leave the two weirdos out here and let’s go watch the movie, if anyone asks you, you don’t know them”

Dino: *nods head like a lil’ child*

*in the theatre*

Jun: “Do you feel cold chan?”

Dino: “Yes” *pouts as he chews on his gummies*

Jun: “Okay you can use my jacket” #mama jun mode on

Hoshi: “I’m cold too! Why isn’t anyone asking me if I’m cold?”

The8: “Because no one cares”

Hoshi: “UGH it’s not like you care about chan either, you’re just giving him special attention today because it’s his damn birt-“

The8: *whacks hoshi with his chocolate bar*

Hoshi: “OW MINGHAO!”

The8: “I can do this all day hyung”

Hoshi: “I miss Woozi…” *sobs*


*halfway through the movie

Dino: “Stop pushing me hyung!”

Hoshi: “Hush it child”

Dino: “Why are we going back to the dorm? We didn’t even get to finish watching the movie!”

Dino: *opens door*

Seventeen: “SURPRISEEE!!!”

Dino: *jumps in shock*

Dino: “I can’t believe you did all of this for me! A dinosaur cake oh my god, dinosaur balloons…is… is… is that a dinosaur poster with a michael jackson face on top of its body?!”

Jeonghan: “Erm… *looks at poster* … yes?”

Dino:

Woozi: “I did it, you better be happy”

Dino:

Dino: “I l-love it” *fake smiles*

Mingyu: *chokes and coughs out white styrofoam*

Dino: “Is…. Mingyu okay?”

Wonwoo: “Don’t ask Chan, some things are better left unknown”

Scoups: “I got you your cake do you like it?”

Dino: “YES it’s a giant dinosaur! Can I eat his head please?”

Joshua: “Hello Chan please look at the banner that I put up ALL BY MYSELF”

Woozi: “Joshua can you stop yelling, I’m just next to you. I’m not deaf”

Dino: “It says Happy birthday chan you’re finally…. five?”

Joshua: “Jeonghan thinks you’re five years old”

Dino: “Of course he does”

Jeonghan: “NUGU AEGI?”

Dino: “Not this again… hyung do I really have to?”

Jeonghan: “Yes”

Dino: “J-Jeonghan’s aegi” *mentally stabs self*

Jeonghan: “TIME TO SING YOU YOUR BIRTHDAY SONG!”

Seventeen: “HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR DINO”

Jeonghan: “YOU MEAN BABY DINO DID YOU EVEN READ THE LYRICS I SENT YOU ALL?!?!?!”

Jun: “Frankly no”

Seventeen: “HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU” *claps hands*

Mingyu: *blows out the candles*

Jeonghan: “Seriously Mingyu what did I tell you?”

Seungkwan: “NOT FAIR YOU GUYS DIDN’T CELEBRATE MY BIRTHDAY I SHOULD BE THE ONES BLOWING OUT THE CANDLES WHY DOES MINGYU GET TO???”

Mingyu: “Because it’s my birthday!”

Seungkwan: “OH you really want to do this Kim Mingyu? Let’s see whose birthday it really is!”

Seungkwan: *cuts the cake and bites it*

Mingyu: *gasps*

Mingyu: “MY CAKE!”

Scoups: “YO DUDE THAT CAKE IS FOR CHAN!”

Dino: *cries*

Jun: “It’s okay Dino, it’s okay” *hugs the baby*

Mingyu: *runs up to poster with a marker and cancels chan’s name and writes his name instead*

Mingyu: “Now it says Happy birthday Mingyu you’re finally five!” *claps for self*

Seungkwan: *gasps*

Woozi: “I’m not the one who hung up the poster but I feel like I need to hit someone”

Seungkwan: *runs towards presents*

Mingyu: “Oh no I’m going to open them!”

Seungkwan: “Not if I get there first!”

Mingyu & Seungkwan: *starts ripping the wrapping paper*

Jeonghan: “WHAT THE HECK”

Mingyu & Seungkwan:

Jeonghan: “I TOLD YOU NOT TO RUIN HIS BIRTHDAY DIDN’T I?”

Mingyu: “But it’s my birthday”

Jeonghan: *grabs mingyu by the collar*

Jeonghan: “I will break everything that you love and care about”

Wonwoo: “Me?”

Jeonghan: “No, I’m going to break all the snacks he secretly hid in this dorm and throw them out of the window”

Mingyu: “NO NOT MY FOOD!!!”

Jeonghan: “THEN BEHAVE!!!”

Dino: “Oh well, it’s okay it was a fun birthday anyways, as long as we are together and not apart”

Joshua: “Awwww what an angel, you really are Jeonghan’s baby”

Vernon:

Joshua: “Y-you know ca-cause Jeonghan is an angel?”

Scoups: “I’m happy you had a good birthday Chan”

Dino: “I got to watch a movie with the performance unit hyungs, even though Hoshi and The8 kept fighting…”

Jeonghan: *glares*

Hoshi: “It was Minghao that hit me, stepped on me, poured his drink on me!”

The8: “That’s because Soonyoung kept mentioning Dino’s birthday!”

Hoshi: “What so you want me to lie???”

Dino: “And the hip hop unit hyungs bought me my favourite cake even though I haven’t tasted it…”

Jeonghan: *GLARES*

Seungkwan: “WHAT”

Vernon: “Now I’m fully equipped with the knowledge from google of how to save a person who is choking from styrofoam”

Wonwoo: “I wish you’re the one who is choking right now because no one would know how to save you”

Vernon: “What did I ever do to you?”

Wonwoo: “For not saving Mingyu”

Vernon: “I TOLD YOU ITS NOT ME! IT WAS THE RECEPTION OF MY PHONE!”

Joshua: “I still want to get rid of that phone so badly”

Dino: “And the vocal unit hyungs decorated the dorm so nicely… even if that Michael Jackson head is just pasted on the dinosaur’s body”

Hoshi: “Did my woozi do that? It’s a WORK OF ART!!! Can I keep it?”

Woozi: “I rather have Dino hate it and burn it then to let you keep it”

Seungkwan: “OKAY ITS TIME FOR GAMES! WE ARE PLAYING… PIN THE TAIL ON THE DOKYEOM!”

DK: “You mean Donkey”

Seungkwan: “No I mean Dokyeom”

DK: “Is that a real pin? With a sharp pointy tip? You can’t pin that on me!”

Seungkwan: *puts a blindfold on Chan*

DK: “What are you all just gonna watch?”

Dino: “Where is Dokyeom hyung? I can’t see” *swings arm around*

DK: *runs away*

Woozi: “Take three steps to your right, then five steps in front, he’s hiding in the corner of the house by the dining table”

Dino: *tries to pin it on Dokyeom*

DK: “AHHHHHHHH!!!! SOMEONE GET THIS CHILD AWAY FROM ME THIS IS A DANGEROUS GAME!”

Jeonghan: “YOU MEAN BABY HE IS A BABY EVERYONE GET YOUR FACTS RIGHT!”

Scoups: “Hold up…. Where’s our TV?”


phew that was a long one, I hoped you all enjoyed it :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE OH SO LIL’ ONE! :)

masterlist ✨

Read the previous episode: Seventeen going to a SHINee Concert

i know thats it probably not canon but can we just imagine if keith and lance end up having the same birthday cause it would turn into the most ridiculous competition ever

Matching

A/N: Seeing Mashima’s art of Gruvia wearing cat ears today made me so happy, I just had to write something! Here’s a short drabble based on it ^.^

Words: 820

Based on Mashima’s Gruvia cat ears graffiti 

“Oi, Juvia! Where’d you go? We’re gonna be late to the dinner party!” Gray turned around to fix his tie in the mirror, looping it over and under before pulling the blue material through and straightening it.

It was Happy’s birthday today and the guild had decided to throw him a huge party, inviting very well half of Magnolia and other nearby guilds to join in on the occasion and make it special for him.

And despite having the whole afternoon to get ready, he and Juvia were still going to be late.

“Juvia? Aren’t you done yet?” Gray called, hearing someone shuffle around in the hallway. “I said we’re gonna be late…”

In the mirror, he caught sight of a familiar blue shape, sneaking across the room before disappearing behind him, hidden asides from a few loose curls peeking out and giving her away entirely.

“Juvia,” he said flatly. “I know you’re there.”

Juvia said nothing, her weight pressed against his back as she raised her arms up to his head, the golden bangles on her wrists jingling softly in his ears along with her quiet giggles.

And when he saw white cat ears appear in the mirror, he said nothing, watching with a deadpan expression as she positioned them on top of his head before peering around his body to glance at the two of them in the mirror.

“What does Gray-sama think?” Juvia asked him, her hair hanging over one shoulder and a smile bright on her lips.

“Not a chance.”

“But Gray-sama looks so sweet!”

“No.”

Juvia stepped forward, taking his arm in hers and pressing her cheek to his shoulder. “But we’re matching!”

Matching.

He was wearing a dark suit, blue shirt, blue tie. She was wearing the same shade as him, her dress flowing elegantly over her figure, golden belt tied at the waist, glinting in the mirror.

They looked good together, the two of them — a contrast of black and blue.

Though, when Gray’s eyes travelled upwards to her hat, he realised that their clothes weren’t all that was matching about them.

He took one look at the navy-coloured cat ears fashioned onto her hat and before he could stop himself, his mouth twitched upwards and he was laughing, hard, a hand over his forehead as he shook his head at how utterly ridiculous they both looked.

Leaning down, Gray flicked one of her cat ears, grinning at her. “Gotta say, it looks better on you than it does on me.”

“Gray-sama looks cute too,” Juvia said, blushing lightly as she reached up to kiss his cheek. “And Happy will be so surprised to see us wearing these!”

So this is what she’d been doing in secret over the past few days – hiding bundles of fabric behind her back every time he’d walk into the room, staying up late to finish ‘a project’, suddenly asking if the two of them could go pay a visit to Carla and Pantherlily out of the blue – she’d been making friggin’ Exceed hats for them to wear to Happy’s birthday party together.

Staring hard at her, he arched a brow. Never before in his life would he consider going out into public like this with white cat ears sticking out of his head. Like hell would he even consider it.

But despite how ridiculous he looked and felt, he couldn’t help but smile at her antics and laugh along with her.

“Okay, fine,” he muttered, rolling his eyes. “But just this once and that’s it, got it? Don’t start getting more ideas.”

“Gray-sama!” Juvia squealed in delight, throwing herself into his arms to hug him tightly. “We’re going to have so much fun!”

He wasn’t sure ‘fun’ was the right word. Gray imagined his guild members’ faces when they’d see the two of them looking like a pair of cats. He sighed for all the trouble he knew was sure to come. The guys would never let him live this down…all he could do was hope that no one was bringing a camera along to the party.

“Yeah, well…” He wrapped his arms around her, drawing her closer. “I wouldn’t do this just for anyone, y’know?”

“Juvia knows,” she said, pulling away to smile at him.

Smirking back, he held her hands loosely in his own. “Alright then, let’s go. Otherwise we’ll be late and by the time we get there, that flame-brain will have eaten everything…”

“Yes,” she said, falling into step beside him as they grabbed their coats and stepped out into the cool evening breeze.

“Ah, Gray-sama…”

“Hm?”

“Say ‘nyaan~’!”

“What?! No way.”

“Gray-sama…”

“You talked me into wearing the cat ears.” He pointed to his head, scowling. “And that’s all you’re getting.”

Juvia laughed as they continued to walk on, cat ears on their heads, her hand in his, and the bag containing their camera swinging lightly from her shoulder.

we are setting up a party!

“i am blowing up the balloons!”

“i am preparing tea!”

“i am inspecting the ball pit!”

“chase is going to have such a good time with all of us! his best ferret friends!”

“we love chase and hope he has a great birthday party!”

Ryan Ross Style Asks
  • Dottie: What’s your favorite animal?
  • The time he left his own 21st birthday party early and flew across the country to Seattle to hang out with Brendon: Got a date mate?
  • That one video where he drinks the fake blood: What do you think of blood?
  • Big hands: Have any kinks?
  • 3 year music hiatus: How do you want to die? 
  • Pretty. Odd.: Sexuality? 
  • Panic! At The Disco: Hardest thing to let go of?
  • Button nose: Do you want kids? How many? 
  • Heart wrenching lyrics that make you want to die: Any special talents? 
  • Ryden: Biggest regret? 
  • Rose Vest: Favorite item of clothing? 
  • Cheese whiz: Pet peeves? 
  • I don’t smoke: Bad Habits?
  • Jazz hands: Ask your own question. 
I'm at a bowling alley I got a cup of wine and my seven-year-old can watch my two year old

I work at a bowling alley, I do birthday parties(i know what to expect from kids in general) Friday nights I run the arcade with my coworker. Normally we have to say please don’t run, do not break anything.

Basic information you need to know the arms on a bowling machine has over 300 pounds of pressure on it, it can sever a limb on an adult and on a kid it will kill them in an instant, bowling is a very safe and very fun as long as you stay in the front. No one under the age of 18 is supposed to even go into the back.

We had a party with a few nuclear families come in and bowl on lane 1 and 2 right next to the arcade. The group was the worst I have ever seen.

What the kids did:

Climb on a handrail that has a note stating not to do so because it is loose(this separtes the arcade from the bowling lanes)

Run around in the arcade and do handstands, they continue to run around after I told him not to but thankfully they stop doing the handstands

The parents had a seven or eight year old watch a two-year-old and also had a 10 year old or 11 year old walking around six month old the girl nearly dropped the six month old more than once

The kids kept running away from the bowling lanes and into the arcade the parents didn’t seem to pay any mind to this until I would bring it to their attention, kids 7 and over normally okay if they are in a group this was a bunch of little guys and a few older kids no more than 11yrs old.

Now here’s the part of the story where things were really pick up. My coworker leaves to go on his break.

The 2 year old went missing twice, first time they just had to go to the other side of the room and found him the second time it was a little more serious the other kids had thought he went into the back.

I find out from one of the kids at the party that the two-year-old is known to play hide and seek and to run away from his mom and dad in public places, fantastic.

They find the two year old right before we go to the mom, at this point I have to tell them mom she can’t let him walk around anymore she has to hold on to him or has to get something to occupy his time. (I don’t want a child be dismembered, excuse me).
“… a baby leash even would be a good, no judgement” (I should not have said that, i guess). But hey i’ve been putting up with this for over 2 hours and i’m not your babysitter.

Apparently the mom is pissed over the entire encounter and bitches to the front desk.
I was told i should not talk about leashes and children in the same sentance ever again. (Fair enough).

Through out this entire experence the parents were bowling and drinking, and most definitely not paying attention to their children. They stayed from 7-11 or later.

Fml

I have this not-so-lowkey desire for Plagg to slowly develop this sort of weird in-his-own-mind rivalry with Gabriel over Adrien. 

Gabriel says no birthday party? WHO CARES IF AN AKUMA THREW IT, WE’RE GOING. Gabriel-approved schedule says it’s bedtime? LEMME SCARF THIS CHEESE NOW LEGGO CLAWS OUT WE’RE LAPPING PARIS TWICE TONIGHT. Gabriel is just in general the neglectful worst? SIT STILL AND LET ME GROOM YOU KID SHUT UP I’M NOT PURRING YOU’RE PURRING fine maybe we’re both purring. 

Basically, Plagg aggressively adopting his chosen as HIS KITTEN DAMMIT and vengefully leaving dead mice in Gabriel’s designer shoes. >> 

//My Hero//

Word Count: 3377

Group: NCT 127

Member: Jaehyun

Warnings: none

Originally posted by yoon-to-the-oh


“C’mon, (Y/N), why won’t you come tonight? For me?” Your best friend pestered you during your last class of the day. It was the Friday before a long weekend and you just couldn’t wait to unwind in the comfort of your home. Nothing appealed to you more in that moment than the idea of putting on your coziest pajamas, watching the cheesiest k-drama, and eating some spicy ramen. But that’s not what Yoona thought. She gave you the best puppy dog eyes she could muster as she continued to question you. “You never go out! And it’s my birthday this weekend. If you go you won’t even have to get me a gift…”  

“Why is it so important that I go? You go to parties without me all the time!” You rolled your eyes at her as you shoved a book into your bag.

Keep reading

im hosting a birthday party

hey guys so basically ive realised tht th best part about birthdays is the cute messges you get from people who appreciate you…… ur birthday is a day u shld feel special u know….. so im going to be making a birthday list on this blog!!!!!! if you are on the list i will be putting ur url and date there so i can wish you a happy birthday and so can many other people!!!!! i jst wnt to appreciate how dope u all are

all u have to do is reblog this and then send me an ask with ur name and birth date!!!! 💓💓💓 lov u guys

ML fic idea

The squad with rollercoasters

•They add two new rollercoaster to a theme park in Paris in honor of Ladybug and Chat Noir.
•The superheroes were invited to the Grand opening and each get free tickets for them +1. (There were more ticket giveaways to not single them out)
(Also. Cue Chat asking Ladybug if they want to go together. Cue Ladybug making an excuse not to)
•The next day they’re in class and Alya is complaining how she didn’t win a ticket
•"I run the Ladyblog! I should get to review the ride for free!“
•Nino’s not much into big rides but he likes the mild and kiddie rides and hasn’t gone in a while
•Last time they went was for Marinette’s 10th birthday party???
•Marinette says she won a ticket and can cover for someone
•Adrien says the same things
•(the kids are as oblivious as always)
•They make an excuse to why they didn’t mention it before
•Permission to go have been granted all around (Adrien finds a way to be without a bodyguard for the day)
•Plans are all set and they’re ready to go!

 –—Day of theme park–—-

Keep reading

haunted house



“Where are you taking me?” I asked, as we passed through a door covered in cobwebs into a dark, damp room. As I looked over my shoulder at (Y/N) she snapped a photo. “I know how much you love this kind of stuff, so for your birthday we’re going to look through a Haunted House” she explained with the biggest grin on her face. “You like that kind of stuff,” I said raising my voice. Geoff crept up behind me with his phones torch under his face, letting out an evil cackle. I jumped, cursing under my breath. “You’re eighteen Shawn, not eight. Come on mate, this is gonna be fun,” he laughed. “Don’t look worried, you’re still gonna have the biggest party after this” (Y/N) said as she wrapped her arm round mine.

“An angry miner lived here in the early 1900s,” the host explained. We had a woman who was showing us around the house, an expert on paranormal activity. “There’s a lot of ghostly presences that have been seen in this house. It’s very dark, so make sure you have your torches on but at some points we will turn them off - you won’t even be able to see your hand in front of your face.” We walked in a single file line down the stairs from the corridor, and huddled in the middle of the basement. “I hope we can make contact with the spirits that reside here,” the woman explained. The basement was damp, with mould in the walls, parts of the walls were even missing. There were a pair of hand prints on the wall which had been dragged down. I felt (Y/N’s) grip on my arm tighten.

“If there’s anybody here, if you want to speak to us can you please make a noise?”  A hollowed bang was heard on the wall near the hand prints. Curses and gasps left the group. “Geoff was that you?” Mike asked. “No, we’re all in the middle. Nowhere near the fucking walls” Geoff replied. “Everyone just calm down,” I sighed. I looked down at (Y/N) at my side who was breathing loudly. “Hey, hey, it’s alright baby. I got you” I whispered, as I pulled her head closer to kiss the top of it. “Shit,” Brian cursed. “What, what happened?” The woman asked frantically. “I just felt a really cold, sharp breeze over my left hand,” he explained. “It’s windy outside,” Andrew said. “But there’s no windows down here,” Mike added. “It could be a way of a spirit trying to show you their presence,” the woman explained.

As we started to head for the stairs again, in silence, the sound of someone walking up the stairs was heard from the floor above. “Did you hear that?” (Y/N) said loudly. A few others replied yes. “What did you hear?” The woman asked. “It sounded like someone walking up the stairs” (Y/N) said, her hand still gripping to my arm. “The stairs in front of you?” the woman asked. “No,” (Y/N) replied quickly. “The ones up on the ground floor, as if someone was going upstairs.”  "Let’s head up there then,“ the woman said. We all remained silent as we slowly crept up the stairs, none of us really wanting to go first.

“What the fuck was that?” I hissed, freezing on the spot as we went passed the staircase in the house. “What?” (Y/N) whispered. “Did you hear it too? The sound of someone groaning?” Geoff asked. “Yeah,” I said as I turned round and pointed my torch at him. “Was it any of you?” I asked, looking round the group - everyone shook their heads. “Let’s go upstairs” the host said. We ended up being in a room, which was known as a guest room, with our torches off. The furniture which remained, was dated. The wallpaper had started peeling off and one of the windows was shattered.

“We’ve been told that a woman in her fifties died in this room, she had problems in her chest. Now, after that, when people would stay in this room they’d say that when they were sleeping they’d be awoken by a deep pushing sensation on their chest” the host told us. “Shit,” Brian cursed under his breath. A couple of minutes went by with the woman calling out for spirits, whilst they rest of us remained silent whilst looking round the room. The lady noticed that Ian was standing in a strange way. “What’s wrong?” she asked. “I feel like I’m being pushed, I’m leaning to keep myself standing up straight” he laughed nervously. “Where are you being pushed?” “On my chest,” he replied. A couple of people gasped, “Like the woman.”

A few seconds went by as we all looked at each other and suddenly a noise like something being rolled on the floor was heard. Andrew crouched down and felt around, finding a small rock near his boot. “It’s warm,” he muttered as he stood back up. The rock was passed around as everyone agreed that it felt warm. The woman held it and said, “If I throw this rock, throw it back to us.”  She threw it across the floor, with it almost reaching the opposite wall.

A few seconds later, Brian felt something hit his shoe. He crouched down, and it was a rock. “Do you think…” he muttered. “It’s probably the same one yes,” the woman said. “That means we have a presence in this room, definitely.” I felt (Y/N) arm wrap around my back, “Shawn, I don’t like this.”  "I thought you loved scary stuff,“ I teased lightly. "No seriously, for fuck sake Shawn, I do not like this.”

Can people stop with the “what about me?” attitude? please?

“Black lives matter”

“Oh, now hold on a minute there, what about other lives? What about me? What about this?”

Am I not allowed to give a single subject attention without giving everyone attention? Is this how you live your life? If your friend goes “man I really like strawberry ice cream” do you get instantly angry and go “OTHER ICECREAMS ARE GOOD TOO!”?

At birthday parties do you barge in and scoop up all the presents telling everyone “hey I matter too! Why don’t I get a party!” Because you think everyone should have equal attention all the time?

The Backstreet Boys on their upcoming Las Vegas residency:
  • HOWIE: Now our fans have their own money—they’re not using mom and dad’s money! They’re going out and celebrating birthdays, bachelorette parties. Vegas is a hotspot for our fans. It just makes sense.
  • KEVIN: It’s also nice for our lifestyle. We’re all fathers now. When you’re in and out of hotels every other day, that takes a toll on you. And we’re not 22 years old anymore.
  • HOWIE: When people ask how we’ve stayed together this long, I always say that it seriously feels like a second marriage.
  • AJ: It’s our first marriage!
  • HOWIE: You’re right—our wives are our second marriage. And like all marriages, you have to work at it. We feel like we owe it to our fans, and to each other. I don’t want to let these guys down.
  • AJ: At the end of the day, we’re still having fun.