This isn't intended to be hate I'm just curious and would like to understand: how can gender be non binary? How can a person not be either male or female? And if a person is non binary how can they define themselves as a woman or man and use the terms lesbian or gay? Please let me know if I phrased anything rudely, I am just trying to understand how others view this! Thanks in advance to anyone who replies. :)
A lot of people see gender as a sort of black-or-white thing, but it’s actually way more diverse than that. I’m cis, so I can’t exactly explain to you how being nonbinary feels, but gender isn’t necessarily a this-or-that deal. There’s lots of shades of gray and even other colors, too. As far as how someone who doesn’t identify exclusively with man or woman, they can still identify partially with manhood or womanhood. Maybe they’re genderfluid and can be agender or a woman and identify with lesbianism because of their womanhood. There’s lots of possibilities beyond just man, woman, and neither.
(Just a note, “male” and “female” aren’t really great terms to use with regards to gender. They tend to refer to “biological sex” in an outdated and narrow way that ignores the fact that even if we are just talking about biological characteristics, people are only separated into “male” and “female” arbitrarily. They also tend to carry transphobic connotations - it’s very common for people to claim that trans women are “biologically male” or whatever in a poorly-veiled attempt to secretly view trans women as men. This isn’t always the case, but i like to stay away from the words male and female anyway. Man and woman are better alternatives.)