I am sorry

Yondu didn’t have a talking car but he did have a flying arrow. He didn’t have the beautiful voice of an angel but he did have the whistle of one. Both Yondu and David Hasselhoff went on kick-ass adventures and hooked up with hot women and fought robots. I guess David Hasselhoff did kind of end up being my dad after all, and it was you, Yondu. I had a pretty cool dad.
—  Peter Quill [Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2]
  • me: *puts pretty. odd. in shuffle*
  • me: *shuffle plays northern downpour*
  • me: hey moon, what the fuck

anonymous asked:

I wish you would write a fic where the ex-Vengers are hanging around Wakanda post Civil War talking and one of them wishes Tony never became Iron Man. Wanda decides to grant that wish and they end up in a universe where Iron Man isn't a thing, a world where Tony Stark survived Afghanistan but never made the armor. Bonus points if Stane was able to lock him out of Stark Industries and Tony disappeared from the public eye afterward.

Okay, to be honest, I don’t know if this took the turn you wanted to but hear me out.

Stane wins; Tony is quietly hustled away and kept in a workshop probably, where he has to work for Stane. Rhodey doesn’t get to see him ever and Stane got rid of Pepper because she was way too clever for Stane’s liking.

Iron Man 1 and 2 don’t really happen; maybe Vanko goes after Stane when he realizes that he got the arc reactor working somehow, but Tony isn’t in there at all.

Stane still deals with weapons, so the Ten Rings are still going strong, rebels all over the world can now take on any government army because they are armed just as well or even better as the soldiers and the world is a mess.

And then the Avengers happen. And it’s here that it gets tragic, because everything goes to shit.

The helicarrier crashes down when Clint takes out the second rotor, because no one is there to quick start it again. The remaining Avengers probably make it off in time, but Fury, Hill and Coulson not so much because they make sure everyone else gets saved first.

The world council still orders a nuclear hit on New York and since there is no Iron Man to carry the bomb into space it hits right where it was supposed to. The Avengers die in a fiery blaze; the Hulk most likely the only one who makes it out of there.

So the world might have averted this particular catastrophe at a very high price but it’s not even the worst one.

Project Inside is a go just a few years later, helicarriers without the repulsor technology but still able to fly and since Cap isn’t there to stop anything they wipe off a horrifying percentage of the world’s population.

Hydra wins.

(And because I am not a completely horrible person, that is gonna be the place where Wanda stops her little magic, but everyone remembers exactly how a world without Tony Stark would be and they are horrified. They never knew he had that much impact on anything even though they were right there.)