I dreamt last night that you came back. You layed there, holding onto me, the words dripping off your tongue like honey as you apologized for leaving and when you kissed me you tasted of it too. We kissed and kissed, pouring every apology, every tear, every ounce of love into each other.
I awoke screaming, not because I hated it, not because it was a nightmare, but because it was everything I had been wishing for.
AND PEOPLE WONDER WHY I DONT SLEEP ANYMORE// 4am
Me gustan todas las versiones de ti.
Tú siendo inmaduro, tú siendo serio, tú concentrado en mí, tú distraído… Tú siendo tú, así nada más… Bello.
Y no belleza física, sino la belleza de tu presencia, de tu sonrisa y tu mirada.
i HONESTLY cannot believe this??!!!!????(i may or may not be squealing uncontrollably right now who knows)THANK YOU SO MUCH TO THE 10,031 OF YOU WHO HAVE STUCK AROUND FOR THIS TRAIN WRECK OF A BLOG I LOVE YOU ALL IMMENSELY THANK YOU(X1000000)!!!!!
What are your favorite things?” I asked you.
“Oh, I love a lot of things” you said, smiling at me. “I love saturday nights, and playing baseball. I love the sound of rain on the roof, blasting music in the car on a tuesday morning, watching movies in the dark. I love staring up at the stars, warm summer nights, eating ice cream before dinner, and late night bus rides with the team.” You pause, and look down at me. “But there’s one thing that tops all of those,” you say. You grab my hand, holding it tight. “It’s that smile, those green eyes, cute little cheeks, the way your nose crinkles up when you laugh. It’s the way your hand fits in mine so perfectly, the feeling of your head on my chest and hand over my heart. It’s that feeling when I lean in to kiss you, that tops it all. It’s you, only you; You’re my number one.
And now I just came to realization that you are always with me.
Even though you are not physically here, you are indeed with me.
In tough times of my life, by far the toughest was losing you, losing your physical presence, losing your voice, losing my ultimate home.
Having you there with me was the greatest, you were there through thick and thin and you still are with me.
Here and there I will get clues of you here.
Here and there I will smell your perfume.
Here and there I will feel the presence of you.
Here and there I will see a picture of a chickadee.
Here and there I will here your voice.
Here and there I will cry uncontrollably from missing you.
And here and there I will fall apart, be lost, confused, angry, and emotional, but I always here your voice in the back of my head.
Everyday it’s an on going cycle of what to do and what you would like best.
So here I am thinking of what to do with my dilemma, knowing that you are right here with me.