I CAN'T WITH THE PERFECTION OF THESE TWO

anonymous asked:

Hi! Big fan of your writing, god, your Wincest is perfection. I just wanted your thoughts on something, if you’d like to discuss it with me. I’m curious about the tags on the gifset you reblogged, ‘I truly don’t understand people who thing Dean was happy with Lisa’. I think, the crux of it is that there were moments of happiness for Dean in the time that he spent with Lisa and Ben. It was what he needed. He found comfort and a reason to live, with them. (1/?)

But that doesn’t diminish his grief for Sam. Even though he might of loved Lisa, that doesn’t mean he wasn’t still suffering for Sam. I don’t know if Dean would have survived that year by himself if he kept hunting, if Sam had found him Soulless how that might have gone down. Dean needed to try something different, something safe, to give him distance and a space to mourn his loss. Lisa was patient with him, she tried to give him what he needed, to understand him. (2/?)

I don’t know if Dean was genuinely happy, he wasn’t happy for the entire time of course he wasn’t, but I think that he loved her in his own way. He needed her. You never get over a great big love like what the brothers have for each other. But that doesn’t mean smaller ones can’t happen. What do you think? (3/3)    

Well, first, thank you. :)

Second: I think we’re… basically in agreement here, anon. I think that, given the absence of Sam, the year with Lisa and Ben was something that Dean definitely needed–Sam was right about that. If all he’d had was the promise that Sam was gone forever, that he wasn’t allowed to get him back, and he’d just gone straight into hunting alone, I think it would’ve been a matter of weeks before he went down on his knees on some back country road and put a shotgun in his mouth. Keeping the promise he made, going to Lisa despite how everything in him wants to die, or find a way to get Sam back, definitely saved his life.

However, the larger context of the tags was that montage we got at the beginning of season six, the one that contrasts Dean’s domestic life with the Braedens with his hunting life with Sammy. When I watched that I saw nothing but misery, and here’s why: Dean isn’t Dean without Sam. There ain’t no me if there ain’t no you–sure, made explicit two years later, but the truth of it radiates throughout the show. I think that Dean did love Lisa and Ben, definitely. The care he shows for them throughout the rest of s6 is proof enough of that. He had real affection for Lisa, and he was a perfect surrogate dad to Ben, and it did give him a purpose. What I don’t think it gave him was a reason to live, and that’s why I don’t think of that time as ‘happy’–at least, not happy without massive qualifiers.

When I watch the montage, when you watch the rest of that episode and see Dean going through his day, what I see is someone going through the motions. I think he probably would’ve continued to, too, if Sam and the Campbells hadn’t swooped in. He would’ve kept working that job, probably would’ve become a foreman and done good work; he would’ve married Lisa, eventually, if he thought she wanted that; he would’ve gone to Ben’s graduation and tried to figure out how to pay for college. But you notice, he never really smiles, for real, that whole time? Despite being in full color it’s like he’s trapped in some grey half-life–walking and breathing and doing what he needs to, but his heart’s sluggish. The first moment of real emotion we see is when he wakes up out of the djinn-paralysis and sees Sam, and it’s like a goddamn switch gets flipped. We finally get real animation, real feeling–his eyes go wide like he’s seeing light for the first time in a year, like he’s waking out of a coma. Doesn’t matter that this hollowed-out brother can’t return it properly, because Dean is back, snapped back into the world like a bone returning to its socket.

He loved Lisa, he did. But it just… can’t compare. Never. No one’s fault, but it’s not Lisa who’s his soulmate, is it. I really do think that’s the crux of it, and it’s why these ‘smaller’ loves the boys have are never something that looks like actual happiness, to me. Lisa, or Amelia, or the vague hints we got of Jessica–they’re all just… placeholders. You can be content, for a while, but a vital piece is missing from the world and in comparison it’s just… pallid. The moments of contentment can keep you going, but there won’t ever be actual joy. You keep going until the real world comes back, or until you realize that it never, ever will–and our boys aren’t prone to suicide, so they’d be left forever in that half-life, until Death, finally, came as a mercy.

A last few comments, in the show’s own words, from 6.01:

DEAN: Do you have any clue what walking away meant for me?
BOBBY: Yeah–a woman and a kid and not getting your guts ripped out at age 30. That’s what it meant.
DEAN: That woman and that kid – I went to them because you asked me to.
BOBBY: Good.
DEAN: Good for who? I showed up on their doorstep half out of my head with grief. God knows why they even let me in. I drank too much. I had nightmares. I looked everywhere. I collected hundreds of books, trying to find anything to bust you out.
SAM: You promised you’d leave it alone.
DEAN: Of course I didn’t leave it alone! Sue me! A damn year? You couldn’t put me out of my misery?

Occasionally content, I’ll give you. Happy? Not as such.

yet another high school on TV
  • a grown ass man who is obviously at least 25 years old: i just turned sixteen i can't wait to get a car :)
  • a grown ass woman with fully formed breasts, perfect skin, and chiseled features: lucky you, chad, i still have to wait TWO MORE YEARS :( being fourteen sucks
My favorite lyrics from Divide
  • just my two cents
  • Eraser: I wish that love was a currency and the whole world was wealthy
  • Castle on the Hill: I had my first kiss on a Friday Night, I don't reckon I did it right // these people raised me and I can't wait to go home
  • Dive: Don't call me baby unless you mean it // I've been known to give my all and jumping in harder than ten thousand rocks on the lake
  • Shape of You: Your love was handmade for somebody like me
  • Perfect: Now I know I have met an angel in person and she looks perfect
  • Galway Girl: I swear I'm gonna put you in a song that I write about a galway girl and a perfect night // She took me inside to finish some doritos and another bottle of wine
  • Happier: But I guess you look happier, you do, my friends told me one day I'd feel it too
  • Hearts Don't Break Around Here: She is the lighthouse in the night that will safely guide me home
  • New man: Still lookin' at your instagram and I'll be creepin' a lil, I'll be tryin' not to double tap from way back cause I know that's where the trouble's at
  • What Do I Know: Just remember that life is more than fitting in your jeans, it's love, understanding, and positivity
  • How Would You Feel: In the summer, as the lilacs blew, blood flows deeper than a river every moment I spend with you
  • Supermarket Flowers: A heart that's broke is a heart that's been loved // A life with love is a life that's been lived
  • Barcelona: We're going somewhere where the sun is shining bright
  • Bibia Be Ye Ye: I tell myself in every way I won't be doing this again and tomorrow's a brand new day
  • Nancy Mulligan: Never had I seen such beauty before the second I saw her, Nancy was my yellow rose
  • Save Myself: Before I save someone else, I've got to save myself
  • Marinette: You are absolutely unbearable!
  • Adrien: Is that right?
  • Marinette: I can't believe you would say something like that.
  • Adrien: I am only speaking the truth! The fact that you won't accept it is on you.
  • (Nino walks in, alya looks absolutely stunned)
  • Nino: Is the perfect couple having an argument. Did I bump my head?
  • Alya: No, they are arguing.
  • Nino: What could these two possibly be arguing about.
  • Alya: About which one of them is the most amazing. Adrien says it is Marinette, Marinette says it is Adrien.
  • Nino: (Sighs) Of course they would
6

On this occasion, a home, more than bricks and mortar, a turtle, it’s a feeling. It’s a feeling of belonging. Isn’t it? Of love of course. Of hope… for the future. I don’t know if I have ever met two people who are more suited to one another than you two. To Barry and Iris. To us.

  • Me two days ago: Okay so Beauty and the Beast is my favorite animated movie and Belle is very special to me and I'm just really worried the live action is going to suck I'm not crazy about Emma's singing and also the dress is hideous and I mean ugh I'm just terrified I'll hate it
  • Me now: THE LIVE ACTION IS EVERYTHING TO ME FLAWS AND ALL HELP ME I CAN'T DEAL
3

everything i read in 2017: deltora quest series by emily rodda

“the enemy is clever and sly, and to its anger and envy a thousand years is like the blink of an eye”

10
'cause we could be immortals, immortals
just not for long, for long.
youtube

uhm???? can we talk about how this performance is literally perfection???? i never knew my favourite oh my girl’s song had a full dance performance???

carry on, darling, we were built to last

Kissing was still weird, Yuuri decided as he kissed his fiancé back.

His fiancé.

His fucking fiancé.

How did that even happen?

Yuuri still had trouble believing that it was all real. That Victor Nikiforov, the Victor Nikiforov, the same one Yuuri had nursed a crush on since, like, forever, was currently wearing a golden ring on his finger. A ring that Yuuri himself had put there with slightly trembling fingers.

How did he even get the guts to do that?

“You’re thinking too much again,” Victor, the same Victor, his fiancé Victor complained, pressing his mouth softly against Yuuri’s as if he was trying to pull him back into the mood, but Yuuri was too–

“I’m sorry,” he replied, blushing sheepishly. “You’re just very distracting.”

It made Victor grin, a little crooked smile that looked simply stunning on his face. Victor’s cheeks were delicately flushed and his eyes sparkled warmly with love and delight. How did Yuuri get so lucky? He remembered everything that happened during the last year, but even now, sitting in Victor’s lap, with Victor’s thumbs rubbing slow circles into his hipbones, Yuuri felt a little like Cinderella.

Was it close to midnight yet? Would he have to leave the ball, leave this happiness when the hands of the clock meet?

“I’m flattered, love,” Victor murmured, kissing the corner of Yuuri’s mouth again and Yuuri couldn’t help the way it twitched into a smile under his lips. “What’s so distracting about me now?”

Yuuri choked on his laugh a bit. “How about everything? Ever? Have you met me, Victor?”

Victor chuckled as well, pulling Yuuri into himself until Yuuri was almost lying on top of his chest. Victor’s nose gently touched Yuuri’s, their foreheads leaned together, a tender caress that melted Yuuri’s heart and made his eyes suddenly grow hotter when all the love and affection hit him hard.

“Of course I have,” Victor said. “Best night of my life.”

Yuuri groaned. “The banquet is taboo, we talked about this.”

Victor made a face at him, like a kicked puppy, and Yuuri only had to take one look to reach out and push Victor’s cheeks up into a smile with his fingers. They both laughed.

“Fine,” Victor said. “How about China then? That is another best night of my life.”

Yuuri shook his head in slight exasperation. “How many best nights do you have?”

“Well, let’s see,” Victor hummed, counting out. “There’s the banquet, okay, okay, I’m not saying more! Then the China Cup, and Barcelona. Oh, Barcelona!” He sighed, his mouth a happy, heart-mouth smile that made Yuuri blush. “That proposal was spectacular. And then you went and won silver, talk about best nights, huh?”

Yuuri mumbled something under his breath, but Victor only grinned at him and let it slide, asking instead: “What about yours, Yuuri?”

He didn’t have to think about it. He really didn’t.

“I was twelve,” Yuuri said immediately, watching Victor’s eye lose the spark for a moment when he realized it wasn’t about their relationship. Yuuri smirked a little. “It was the night I watched the junior skating championship for the first time. And there was this one skater that just took my breath away.” Yuuri smiled fondly at the memory. “I couldn’t fall asleep at all that night, my heart was beating so fast. So I googled that skater and watched all of the videos available just to see him again.”

“Wow, that sounds like quite a night,” Victor smiled at him. “Is he the reason you took up skating?”

“Mostly,” Yuuri agreed. “He’s my inspiration, my motivation, my guiding star, you might say. And, hopefully soon, my husband, too.”

He grinned, even though his cheeks were stinging red – it was embarrassing to say out loud.

But Victor’s reaction was worth it: the surprise on him looked stunning, and Yuuri would never get over the rush in his veins at the heartbeat of pause in Victor’s breathing before a high keen left his lips. It was no wonder Victor based his performances around the emotion. It was quite addicting, Yuuri had to admit.

“Yuuri!” Victor cooed, crushing Yuuri in his arms. “You should’ve told me sooner!”

“Like you didn’t know,” Yuuri snorted into Victor’s neck, wrapping his arms around his shoulders comfortably. “I know you found my stash of posters one day, Mari told me.”

Victor wasn’t contrite at all. In fact, Yuuri could feel the grin pressed against his head.

“Oops,” Victor said. It only served to make Yuuri snort again.

They stayed close like that for a long, comfortable moment, before Victor slowly pulled back and tilted Yuuri’s chin to make their eyes meet. Blue against brown, both meltingly warm and full of love.

“You’ve spent so long chasing after me that it’s only fair that I chase after you for the rest of our lives,” he said, but Yuuri shook his head at him with a tiny smile.

“Why chase, when you’ve already got me?” he asked.

And when Victor leaned in to kiss him again, it was no less weird than before. But it was their weird and in a weird, completely silly way that Yuuri couldn’t have explained even if he tried, that made it just perfect.

WYNONNA EARP + 9TH OF JUNE = NEFTFLIX

June 9th will be the day I finally get netflix, and it’s all thanks to the amazing Emily Andras and the fantastic show she has created. Wynonna Earp is filled with such powerful imperfectly perfect female characters, a great cast and an amazing approach to same sex relationships (even if it’s a sub plot). This has been one of the best representations of lesbian relationships I’ve seen on tv and it’s one of the main reasons why we should fight for a show like this to keep being renewed. And that my friends is why I’m getting Netflix.

(original link for the video http://comicbook.com/2016/12/21/wynonna-earp-cast-members-wish-fans-happy-holidays-with-whiskey-/)