Hoes-be-like

jin stans: older than 20. mature. beautiful. think theyre funny. theyre not. everyone likes you, you think they dont but they do dont worry. take a lot of food pics.

yoongi stans: lgbt. love cats. are sad and soft inside but tsundere af. stop being so sarcastic please. fights with the teacher for fun. are adorable but only with ppl they know.

hoseok stans: soft. pretty. amazing. too pure for this world. i love you. youre perfect. you smell good. hoseok stans for president 2020. there is literally nothing bad about you.

namjoon stans: sexy and perfect if youre a girl, straight and lowkey annoying if youre a boy. protect them, theyre soft and get hurt easily even if they seem tough. beautiful like a galaxy. trips a lot.

jimin stans: too extra chill pls there is no need. supportive. sensitive but will cut a bitch if it’s necessary. theyre effortlessly hot teach me. have a temper™

taehyung stans: go away with your hipster shit. art hoe, music hoe, fashion hoe, also just a hoe. have like a thousand facebook friends and they actually talk to them all consistently, like how? confident.

jungkook stans: cute. seem bitchy but theyre really not so dont hate them for it. would take a bullet for their friends. generous. cry easily. smart af. 

I love how these petty ass hoes keep tweeting shit like “who tf is bts no one knows these chinks” while its pretty fucking clear that these chinks who supposedly no one knows are topping billboard charts for consecutive weeks, always trending worldwide on twitter, being recognized by big-name celebrities, getting over 100k+ likes a MINUTE on everything they post, and literally slaying your precious faves in a category thats normally dominated by american artists and their fans. like bITCH NO WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU LMAO SIT DOWN W YOUR IGNORANT LOOKIN ASSSS

3

why i hated kenddricks new video. yall white and non black hoes eating that shit up like it was revolutionary. just the same niggerish bullshit kendrick does

edit; this isnt me u dumbasses
THE SIGNS AS THINGS I'VE SAID BEFORE
  • Aries: People hold hands? Psh I can't relate, I throw hands like a real man.
  • Taurus: [puts on fake glasses] It's time to read some hoes.
  • Gemini: Me actually liking someone? Sounds fake, I just like the validation that I'm not complete trash.
  • Cancer: I'm internally screaming right now because the one day I decide to wear makeup I keep crying. My eyelashes are clumping together and I cannot. I refuse.
  • Leo: Do you ever see the sun and you're like ... Man, I'd love to punch it because same. I want to punch the sun so hard. My only chance to be fist-kissed by a hottie.
  • Virgo: I feel bad that I don't recycle. I just can't be inspired to do it because I still feel terrible about life after doing so. [throws water bottle in recycling bin] Oh look, I still have depression!
  • Libra: I want to have a flowery aesthetic... I need a group of friends that are always willing to take pictures of frolicking through flower fields.
  • Scorpio: I love the fact that no one really knows anything about me, but it also makes me kind of sad at the same time. What is my legacy besides being the mysterious and hot one?
  • Sagittarius: The only person in this world who will never break my heart is education connection lady. She's still in 2009 singing about her education experience and I refuse to believe anything different.
  • Capricorn: I've spent 10 hours of my life listening to the education connection song. If I don't make it to college, then I may as well just die.
  • Aquarius: Other people around me are always like "I LOVE YOU! OMG, I LOVE YOU!" Meanwhile I'm just eating my imaginary popcorn thinking about how much I hate everyone.
  • Pisces: I'm eating five hour old chicken nuggets and I'm sad. I don't think I'll finish them... I have to throw them away... This is probably the worst thing I've ever done in my life.
  • SM: Okay guys we figured out your hair colors and such.
  • Suho: What are they?
  • SM: Kai you'll have a sea blue type color shit - they won't know if it's dark blue or black. Trick them hoes. Baekhyun you will look like Gerard Way from MCR, so bring out your inner emo, and no more side burns. Sehun, oh Sehun. *smirks* Kid you're gonna look like a fucking cheeto. Suho you're gonna have "boy next door" hair. Lay - where's Lay?
  • Exol: *randomly pops up* THE KING IS IN CHINA RN!11!!!1!!
  • SM: OOoooOkay......... so Lay gets no change then. Moving on, Xiumim you will have black hair (like my soul). CHEN WE ARE BLEACHING YOUR SHIT, WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT! GO BIG OR GO HOME!! UUmm, Kyungsoo no more egg head. It needs to stahp. And we're bringing back the rainbow. Chanyeol you'll have it, cause I know those bitches will love all those pastel fucking colors and shit. Bitches are gonna be wehet. Any questions?
  • Exo: ........