Highly educated

How I lost another piece of my faith in humanity

So I come from Eastern Europe. As you can imagine we are not exactly socially evolved over here. Racism, homophobia, xenophobia and so on are rampant here .Therefore it probably shouldn’t come as a surprise when I tell you that this year is the first time I have actually talked to a gay person in real life(well that I know of). I was abroad on an international training about human rights issues and there were participants from nearly a dozen European countries.

Everything was great. They were all wonderful people and that’s when I met the first openly gay person I have met in real life.  He was one of the participants from Britain.He was a dude in his 40′s. He represented an NGO that dealed with helping immigrants, he was highly educated, he talked very lovingly about his husband,,,,,he just seemed like a very decent and very nice person. For the sake of this story let’s call him John

And then came the group dinner. The organizers of the training took to us to this little restaurant near sea. We were eighteen people. Fifteen women and three dudes. The dinner was going great . We had lively debates, we exchanged stories and then suddenly John looked outside and loudly said

“Well this is just embarrassing!”

“What?” we asked naturally

“Look at her. She must be at least forty and she still dresses like a whore”

He was pointing at a woman outside who was gorgeous but slightly older and was wearing a rather tight dress. Needless to say that made the atmosphere on the predominately female dominated table kind of awkward. He didn’t notice. If anything it looked like he was waiting for the rest of to join in and bash the lady. Most of the women were clearly uncomfortable but nobody really wanted to ruin the atmosphere by starting an argument. A few women just tried deflecting the topic by saying that they wished they had her body when they were her age and so on.

Now me being from Eastern Europe I don’t really care much about tact or ruining things so I said to him:

“ Dude that’s not cool. If it makes her feel good about herself she can dress however she wants to.”

and then he responded with this little piece

“So what? If it makes me feel good to whip out my dick and swing it around I should do it?”

And I was left pretty much speechless at this. This is the kind of line I would expect from a twelve year old troll on the internet. Not a highly educated forty year old man who has dedicated his life to helping others and was just literally telling us fifteen minutes ago how hard it is to face all the discrimination in his daily life.. People like him were supposed to be enlightened. I was hoping this was some kind of elaborate if slightly tasteless joke but nope.

On some level I always knew  misogyny is incredibly widespread and can be found literally everywhere but somehow I could never truly bring myself to  believe this. I always thought that when you are educated enough, when you care enough about issues, when you have suffered yourself you just somehow automatically begin respecting women as well because why the fuck wouldn’t you?. I was proven very wrong this night . Literally everyone can be a sexist dick no matter what their background is. This is really sad. Women must be in a constant state of disappointment from us men


This is my DIRECT response to the media, the injustice and inequality of our justice system, police brutality, and the overall undermining bigotry in this country. This is just how I feel as an educated Black man living in America.

ps People keep pointing out that *engineering is spelled wrong, there’s a reason for that. You have to decipher what’s being said, that’s the beauty of art.