A Shakespearean Character Guide to Dealing with an Annoying Roommate

Macbeth: Invite him to a sleepover. Then stab him.

Hamlet: Put on a play that outlines all of your roommate’s annoying flaws. Then stab him.

Romeo: Marry his cousin and try to start a new, peaceful relationship. When that doesn’t work, stab him.

Brutus: Petition your roommate to change for the better. Then stab him with 60 of your closest friends.

Othello: Talk to your friend about the problems you’re having with your roommate. Then strangle him.

Shylock: Make him sign a pound of flesh as collateral on your roommate agreement. Collect on it.

Cleopatra: Set a poisonous snake loose in his room.

Henry VIII: Marry him. Then cut off his head.


Elizabeth I’s diamond and ruby ring, bearing her initial and taken from her body after her death in 1603, reveals more than meets the eye. A secret compartment opens to display two miniatures of Elizabeth and her mother, Anne Boleyn. The second of Henry VIII’s wives, Anne was executed on May 19, 1536 on charges of incest, adultery, and high treason. The future queen was only two years old at the time of her mother’s death.  


🎁 cortegiania’s 12 days of christmas  

[Anne] married for love. Her relationship with Henry was deeply personal in a way kings had risked only once before, and never did again until the twentieth century. The couple’s attempt to have an affectionate marriage, with perceptible hints of modernity in the context of a Tudor court, explains much of the life and death of Anne Boleyn. Eric Ives {x}

petition to stop wording summaries of Henry VIII’s marriages to lay blame at the wives’ feet. stop using ‘failure to produce a son’ as a legitimate reason for Henry abusing and killing Katharine of Aragon and Anne Boleyn respectively. stop using Katherine Howard’s alleged promiscuity as a valid reason for her death. stop simplifying these complex situations to make Henry sound like a hero.


Never before had the world seen four such giants coexisting. Sometimes friends, more often enemies, these men held Europe in the hollow of their hands.

One time Henry VIII had a book when he was little and he wrote in really massive writing on the first page “this boke is myne” and I just find it so funny because that’s such a child Henry VIII thing to do


“The early sixteenth century was a time when prophecies were popular and prophets were confident: men and women puzzled over ancient rhymes which might (or might not) be held to have predicted such mighty topics such as the fall of Cardinal Wolsey, the split from Rome, and the dissolution of the monasteries. But no one ever predicted the King would marry six times and, if they had, he would not have believed it. Nor for that matter would any of his six queens have believed the various densities which lay in store for them, if predicted at birth: not one but two princesses were to die cast off; equally surprising, four women of modest enough birth were to become royal consorts; most astonishingly of all…two of these apparently unexceptional women were to die a traitor’s death.” Antonia Fraser, The Wives of Henry VIII.

Pictured in order: Katherine of Aragon, Anne Boleyn, Jane Seymour, Anne of Cleves, Catherine Howard, and Catherine Parr

me: I must understand the medieval History of England.

*some books and documentaries later*

me: …plenty of Kings indeed…

me: *a bit doubtful* So let’s systematize:

me: *quite doubtful and sweating* Just need to add the respective names and dates and it will be great…