Well, when the episode title was announced, we were like, “Okay this has a legitimate explanation, do not think about any angel hearts we’re concerned about. Remember when they wrote an episode titled SLASH FICTION? They like screwing with us.”
Then it was revealed that Cas was in the episode and we were like, “Okay, it’s the ending arc of the season, of course Castiel is there, we’re not gonna get excited, it’s probably not even about Castiel.”
Then we found out Robbie Thompson wrote the episode and we were like, “Oh. Um. That’s fine. I mean we’ll get some Destiel subtext in our one forty-second Dean and Cas scene because Robbie always delivers on that front, but it’ll still be subtexty business as usual.”
Then we got the sunset Cockles pictures while they were filming the episode and we were like, “Nothing to see here, just because Jensen and Misha have enough screentime together that they’re goofing off between takes and playing on twitter doesn’t mean Dean and Cas are gonna spend quality time together, we are FINE.”
Then they posted that video of them imitating the cat video and we were like, “Dean and Cas and Claire all together? And on a completely different set? Dean and Cas get at least TWO SCENES together, that’s fine, we’re fine, we’re NOT GONNA FREAK OUT.”
Then the episode summary came out and we were like, “Oh, and Amelia Novak too? Because we’ve already done the Cas-is-alone-in-his-body consent bit, and if we end up tying up this Novak loose end in a satisfying way, no one could really argue that Cas is a problematic romantic interest. It’s not like they did this exact same arc in the epic-length Redemption Road series of Destiel fanfics in order to resolve these issues, EXCEPT OH WAIT THEY DID. No. These two things are probably unrelated.” And then we weakly clutched our chests and whispered, “No homo.”
Then the promo pictures came out and we were like, “FOUR SCENES TOGETHER, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. DEAN AND CAS ARE IN AT LEAST FOUR SCENES TOGETHER THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY. But that’s surely all we get, that’s surely too much glory already, there are no-homo explanations for all of this. THIS IS FINE WE ARE FINE.”
And then the actual video promo came out and we were like, “Are you serious, Cas and the Novaks, Dean and Cas scenes, and NOW AN ANGEL ASSASSIN? When was the last time an angel assassin dealt with an Angel Heart? Oh yeah, in the badly-disguised Destiel fanfic that was Heaven Can’t Wait. WE ARE FINE WE ARE ALL FUCKING FINE NOBODY PANIC.”
There are too many things and we are excited about all of them, and trying to temper our own excitement with what we can realistically expect at this point in the season and this point in their plot arcs.
It is not working.
We are slowly beginning to get optimistic.
This can only end in tears.