I knew it wouldn’t last. I knew it from the moment we first talked. Yet i still had hope that maybe just once in my life something good could stay.
You & I

We can’t be over. You can’t tell me you have no more feelings for me. This isn’t happening. We were supposed to make so many more memories together. I don’t know anyone else that makes time stand still when I’m with them. I can’t think of any other girl I want to spend my life with. You said this would be forever and I’m sorry I made you stop liking me. People changed and I became bitter because of the world and what it’s done. I took my frustration out on you and you broke. You couldn’t take anymore pain. But now that I heard those words, I can’t go on living. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I can’t roam this Earth with half of me missing. I love you so much, please don’t tell me it’s over anymore. Please tell me you still feel something. Anything. I just can’t believe myself into believing that you feel nothing towards me. Please tell me something is still there, please tell me there is still a chance of us being happy together. Don’t you see us being married? Don’t you remember all the good times? I’m literally begging you, on my knees, to take back those words. They couldn’t have been real. You were just mad and tried to hurt me. Right? Right…? Please still love me. Please still like me. Please. 

Im at that point now where i have to decide whether i should move on or continue grasping something that’s barely there; like cold hands in the winter fog.

I Want you. So bad. But I’ve done so much and I’ve waited for so long for you. My heart still stirs when i see you, not wanting to believe what my mind does. The only thing holding me back from moving on is the nagging voice in my head saying “just one more day. Just one more sign. Just go to sleep and he’ll love you tomorrow ”

— 

2-2-16

Just a note, i wrote this while sitting at the back of my car. It was just a thought that popped up in my head so I reached for my phone to type it and i never knew it could connect to this many people . 💖