“Maggot Brain" was a feeling. Getting off a fucking airplane, man, and walking down Broadway in New York with my guitar on my back and not really feeling good. So now I walk in the studio, and they say, “Eddie play,” and I just played. That’s where it came from. One take.
A lot of comparison has been made between “Awaken, My Love!” and Maggot Brain. Donald has stated that Maggot Brain was his father’s most played album when he was growing up. Maggot Brain is a funk album by the group Funkadelic, lead by George Clinton, who also appeared on Kendrick Lamar’s To Pimp a Butterfly. If you are a fan of funk, check it out.
Note: Sorry this took so long. I’m a terrible writer. I hope that you enjoy reading this anyway. This happens in Hamiltime btw. A bit of an AU still, I guess
Request: Omg I loved that TJeff story you did! Can you do a super intense # 37 # 51 #76 with him but with a happy ending? Thank you so much. I love your writing
Pairing: Thomas Jefferson x Reader
Prompts: “Don’t fucking touch me.”,
“Go on then, tell me. Tell me you don’t love me.”, and
“I can’t… I can’t lose you.”
Warnings: Swearing, I guess
You had been living with your friend of three years, Thomas for what
seemed like forever. It was quite a weird arrangement, as women and men rarely
lived together except for husband and wife in the 1700’s, but it somehow worked
out anyway. But, now that your 1 year anniversary as roommates came around, you
realized just how much you loved spending your time with Thomas, even though he
was a very busy man. Granted, the two of you had your fights, but you always
managed to work through it. It was truly amazing, that you had found someone
like him to live with.
However, this time he had stepped over the line that you had already set
from the beginning. You did not want him to tell you what to do ever. And it
always pissed you off whenever he did and this time, it was even worse as he had
commented on the way you led your life.
“Come on, Y/N! We have been living together for a year. Come with us,
drink some beer. Christ, you are going to end up dying alone if you do not go
out and socialize more.” He complained. Although you knew the last part was
said to be somewhat funny, it made you even angrier.
“Fuck off, Thomas! You have no right to comment on my life. I get to
have that one rule!” You were shouting on the top of your lungs by now. He had
tried to get you to go out for about a half an hour now and you did not want
to. It had annoyed you a great deal at first, but you had then tried to ignore
him until he said that.
He quickly noticed that he had hurt you and with an apologetic
expression on his face, he reached out for you. “Y/N. Please. I am truly sorry.
I did not mean it like th..-“ He said, as he gently placed a hand against your
“Do not fucking touch me, Thomas!” You cut him off, as you pushed his big,
warm hand away from your arm and stepped back. Tears were starting to sting
your eyes. It always happened when you became this angry, you always started to
cry. You were honesty not too surprised when the tears started to spill over
and run down your cheeks.
“Please, Y/N. I did not mean it like that.” He pleaded. He was obviously
sorry, but it just was not enough for you. He had honestly broken your trust in
a way, since he had promised to never comment on the way you decided to live
“No. Can you just leave? Go drink with your buddies as you always do, knock
out a redcoat or two, have mindless sex with some lady or whatever.” You said
as you crossed your arms over your chest. You were not going to give in this
time. He did not deserve it.
“How dare you speak to me like that, Y/N?” He was the one shouting now.
Your speech about him being a drunk, violent and addicted to sex obviously did
not sit well with him. You got it, but you were too angry to care.
“You are finally showing your true stripes, huh?” You spat. Before he
could get to answer, you stormed out of your bedroom. You had no idea where you
were going, but you just really needed to get away for a while.
It had been about a day when you finally decided on somewhere to go,
Dolly allowed you to hide out at the Madisons’ place over night. Dolley had let
you in while James was out. Thomas had explained his side of the story to
James, but the two of you obviously had two different versions of the same story.
You had told yours and how little James wanted to admit it, he would always
value Thomas’ words over yours. But, at least he let you stay the night. While Thomas
was very angry with you, he still cared a lot and if he got word that James had
sent you out in the streets at night, he would probably kill him.
Lying awake that night, you had made up your mind. If Thomas wanted you
to find someone in your life, you would show him that you definitely could. You
were moving out. You already decided that it was what was going to go down. You
had no idea where you would move, but you just knew that you wanted to see his
face when you had more friends than him and found a husband before he found a
The Madisons surprisingly let you stay a second day. Dolley was happy to
have someone around, but James was not too happy with it being you, when his
friend was as angry with you as Thomas was. He also let you know that he had
told Mr. Jefferson about your stay at his house, because he felt it was his ‘duty’
to do so. But, you knew it was because he would rather have you being angry
with him than Thomas.
When you and the Madisons were about to head to bed that night, just
before all of you slipped under the covers there was a row of harsh knock on
the door. Because it was not your house, you simply decided to stay put. Even
if it was Thomas, there was nothing you could do about it. James would let him
in no matter what.
“Where is she?” Thomas dawdled loudly. You knew that it would be a
matter of seconds before the door would be opened and you would have to talk to
him, even if you wanted nothing to do with him. You were obviously right, as
the door was opened seconds later by James.
“I believe he belongs to you.” He said, no sign of humor on his face as
he pushed a drunk Thomas Jefferson into the guest bedroom you were staying in
and closed the door after you.
You stood in silence for a while, staring up at him and him staring back
at you. You were not sure why he had decided to show up at an hour like this,
but had no intention of finding out why. You just wanted him out. Or maybe you just
wanted. You could not help but notice how amazingly gorgeous he looked so
angry, even if he was drunk. But, you simply crossed your arms over your chest
silently as you arched an eyebrow.
“I hate you.” He blurted. It was obviously not what he wanted to say,
but exactly the opposite. You just knew somehow. Maybe it was because of the
expression on his face or maybe the kiss that came next. He tasted like alcohol.
You let yourself melt into the kiss for a second, but then realized what you
were doing and pushed his chest harshly and let go of his lips as your hand
flew to cover your lips.
“No, Thomas…” You almost gasped. He had just kissed you. You had just
kissed him and you were supposed to be really angry with him, but in reality,
you just really wanted more. You obviously were not about to admit something
like that. He needed someone important, someone who could accept his dominating
nature and if you let him court you, it would end up in heated, hateful sex
every time you had a fight and you would never work things out.
He grimaced slightly. He thought knew that you wanted this, but he did
not want to force you. But now, he thought that he had perhaps read too much
into your friendship and you had really wanted nothing more than a friend and
someone to live with. “Go on then, tell me. Tell me you do not love me.” He
finally said, sounding very angry and hurt.
You wanted to tell him that you did, because you actually did. You had
been in love with him since the first time you met him. But, both of you
deserved better. You honestly did not believe that you could make this work. “I
do not love you, Thomas.” You stated firmly, though you felt your hands start
to tremble. Why was this so hard?
After what seemed like minutes, he blinked a couple of times and while he
turned to the door, he said: “I will get my things. You can have the house once
I move out.” He decided and gave you no time to answer before he left the room,
reeling slightly as he walked.
You did not see him for the following two months, but was invited to
celebrate Dolley’s birthday over a small dinner with their closest friends who
turned out to be you, Thomas, George Clinton, and a couple of other people that
you had no idea who was.
When you arrived, and noticed that Thomas was indeed there as you had
thought he would be, you had no idea whether or not to greet him. Once having
made the round of greeting the rest of the guests and the hosts, you finally
made your way to him. “Mr. Jefferson.” You greeted, as you curtseyed and he
“Miss Y/LN. It has been so long.” He greeted with a soft smile. You
stared into his charming brown eyes for a second, but then lowered your gaze.
The dinner went by painfully slowly. You probably drank a bit too much wine
and you did not get to talk much either. Mostly because you felt sad about not
having Thomas in your life anymore. It hurt to see him happy even without you.
Speaking of, the two of you caught each other’s gaze a couple of times, but
never dared to smile. You feared that if you tried, he would simply reject you.
It felt like ages until dinner finally ended and you wanted nothing more than
to leave. But, the Madisons’ obviously had other plans in mind. In the adjacent
room, a small orchestra had been set up and you were all encouraged to dance.
At some point, you ended up in Thomas’ arms and the music seemed to slow
down as the two of you moved in sync.
“I miss you. It is not the same without you, Y/N” He said under his
breath, as the two of you moved over the floor smoothly. You were taken a bit
aback by his words, as you had not expected him to say anything along those
lines. He was a man of pride and you knew that he would never admit that he had
made a mistake unless it really meant the world to him.
“I cannot…. I cannot lose you, Thomas.” You finally admitted. You had to
blink to not let tears form in your eyes. You missed him terribly and you could
not help but think about it through the 2 last months. The two of you could
have tried to make it work. But, instead you pushed him away because you were
The orchestra had long stopped playing, but the two of you still swayed
over the floor gracefully, having no intention of leaving your somewhat perfect
bubble right now. “Y/N. I really do love you. I understand if you do not feel
the same about me… But, I just thought…” The two of you finally stopped moving,
standing completely still in the middle of the floor, none of you seeming to
notice that all eyes were on the two of you.
Before he could say anything else, you tiptoed to place a gentle kiss on
his cheek. “I love you too, Thomas.” You gave in to the temptation, even if you
knew that this could possibly end in disaster. You lowered your gaze as you
started to come back to reality. The music had stopped and everyone were
looking at you, waiting for something to happen.
And it definitely did.
His hand gently found its way to your chin as he carefully used two
fingers to lift your head so that you were actually facing him. He knew that he
did not have to asked, so he simply bent over you, his lips feathering over
yours at first. He then properly kissed you, basically crashing his lips into
yours, which made a few gasps erupt from the bystanders and they quickly left
the room, letting the two of you be.
After a couple of second, the two of you finally broke away. You looked
up at him with a grin on his face, which made him chuckle softly. “I still hate
you.” He teased as he gently placed his arms around you, pulling you into his
You carefully wrapped your arms around him in return, placing a light
kiss against his jaw. “I hate you too, Thomas.” You joked.