Sleepover weekend

send in your:
happy thoughts
stories about your crushes/friends/etc
bad pickup lines
shameless self promotion
funny or embarrassing stories
share your conspiracies
tell me facts about the universe
ask me shit
just talk to me


Idk if this has been done but I made this in the car today & I was cracking myself up

sometimes i casually remember that i once dated a guy whose dad was a bank robber, but i didnt find out until my next boyfriend (whose dad was an fbi agent) ran a background check on all of my exes. 


1) when my mom finally admits harry is hot

2) when i overhear a conversation about harry

3) when someone tells me ill never meet harry

4) when harry is dating some skinny bitch

5) when harry breaks up with the skinny bitch

6) when harry dresses nicely

7) when harry sings his fucking solos





We want you to go out there and have fun but we want you to remember one thing… (x)

hi yall! i just wanted to say a quick sorry for any heart attacks i caused last night with my april fool’s prank. in case you haven’t figured it out already, troye did not indeed announce his album, risk, set to come out on may 8th. all the tweets and snapchats and stuff were all made up. i made the album art myself (but it came out pretty cool, right??!!).
but yeah. thanks for not murdering me, yall (: it was all in the name of fun and games, so I’m sorry if it caused you actual severe panic or fear. that was never my intention.
Finally, a HUGE shoutout to my awesome friends i3troyler thiswillbringuscloser tronnorissocoollike whatstroyler and sotroye for helping me actually pull this off. i couldn’t have done it without you

Tyrannosaurus Fic Rex

 A typical fic rec list but with added dinosaur references (which definitely makes it cooler)

Originally posted by forassgard

Let’s get this dinosaur party started (you’re probably gonna need those margaritas)

Keep reading

Oh, I wish you could meet my wife. My wife who lives in England. She couldn’t be sweeter, I wish you could meet her! My wife who lives in England! Her name is Martha, she lives in London. She cooks like my mother and sucks like a hoover! Haha! I write her every single day just to make sure that everything’s okay! It’s a pity she lives so far away in England! Last week she was here, but she had the flu. Too bad ‘cause I wanted to introduce her to you. It’s so sad but there wasn’t a thing that she could do but stay in bed- with her legs up over her head! Oh! I wish you could meet my wife, but you can’t ‘cause she is in England! I love her, I miss her, I can’t wait to kiss her, so soon I’ll be off to Martha! (pause) I mean London! Shit… Her name is Martha, she lives in Lond – She’s my wife! My wonderful wife! Yes, I have a wife who lives in England! And I can’t wait to eat her pussy again!
—  John Laurens