Humans in spaaaaace

Had this thought last night as I lay falling asleep. We have all these space-exploration-ensemble shows with a bunch of aliens each of which has some sort of super-human power, more or less. And humans are always given ~leadership~ as their special power. The ability to bring people together, to organize shit, and I always thought, like…what a shitty power. What a shitty colonial “you were a mess until we came in and saved you” power. Drives me nuts. Seems like if an alien species builds a got-damn ship that can fly through got-damn space they probably have their shit together, right? At least somewhat?

So then I figure, what is humanity got to contribute to all these super-beings? We’re just nonsense reckless critters careening through space. Seems like we’d be more trouble than we’re worth.

But what if…I mean, what if that’s us. We’re the universe’s huckleberries. We’ll run headlong into danger, and we’ll *laugh*. And what if…what if we survive and a weirdly abnormally high rate. Like any alien with two bits of math can put together that we should have wiped ourselves out a long time ago with the first set of “hold my beer, and watch this.” So what the shit, how are we still banging around the universe building shit and flying off solar ramps into the sun while doing some spaceship equivalent of an ollie while crushing beer cans on our forehead. Why. Why do we exist.

And then it hits me. We survive. We’re super good at it. Uncannily good at it. So much so that we…I mean, we actually bend probability in our favor. It’s absurd. And it totally falls flat if you actually tell us this (“Never tell me the odds,” said Solo, knowing full well that knowing the odds kills a human’s chances of survival).

So there we are. Careening around the universe. Joining alien crews because they know that with a human on board, especially a cocky human in some kind of leadership position, can warp probability to stretch success in their favor. And they can never ever tell us this. So instead they just pat our heads and tell us we’re just so good at ~leadership~ and that’s what makes humans special

But really…we’re just a bunch of space dinguses.

jennonthewire  asked:

FARSCAPE?!?!?!!!!!! !!!! !!!! ... !


Because, there’s John Crichton, who goes from accidental idiot Earthling explorer:

Originally posted by alivingship

To Crichton, seasoned idiot Earthling who is accidentally dangerous because wormholes, and oh yeah, he’s going completely BATSHIT CRAZY.

Originally posted by jumpingpuddles

It’s not just Crichton, though, it’s that he’s not really the hero of the story. These guys are:

Originally posted by redyredred

But then there’s also this:

Originally posted by ashortstoryaboutlove


Originally posted by code-name-bluebird


Originally posted by wonderwomun


Originally posted by catvampcrazines


Originally posted by sharethewonders

So, yes, FARSCAPE.

Okay so I have a dumb headcanon that maybe a collective 3 whole people will like at all but hear me out.

So, in Weirdmageddon Part III we all know that Bill Cipher was fucking murdered. 

BUT what if since Stan has his memory back…there are still fragments of Bill in Stan’s head. He’s fucking useless and has no powers left and no hope of ever gaining them back, but he can show up (seen only by Stan) to give terrible advice and try to convince Stan to do things for him. He fails miserably of course. Because he’s a failure, a loud, annoying failure.

I bring this up because I love the idea of him as Stan’s personal Harvey. Who is Harvey? This is Harvey.

He’s the clone of the main antagonist of Farscape that lives inside the protagonist’s head. It started out Harvey was trying to steal secrets from protagonist’s brain but the protagonist figured out how to overpower Harvey completely (sounding familiar?) and now Harvey’s just a nuisance he has to live with.

And Harvey continuously shows up in stupider and stupider scenarios in the protag’s head so the possibilities are limitless really.

The Stans go on a roller coaster? Bill is there

Casually sitting somewhere? Fuck you here’s Bill

There’s so many stupid things you can do with Bill trying to mess with Stan while also being disgusted he’s gotten to this point.

This has been: a very roundabout way of saying I want to hear Bill Cipher say “Kill them, then we’ll have Pizza, and Margarita shooters!”