Eva Khatchadourian

Eva: Besides, when you grow up you’ll need a job, and then you’ll have to be able to read and write really well or no one will want to hire you.
Kevin: Dad doesn’t write. He drives around and takes pictures.
Eva: There are other jobs…
Kevin: What if I don’t want a job.
Eva: Then you’d have to go on welfare. The government would give you just a little money so you don’t starve, but not enough to do anything fun.
Kevin: What if I don’t want to do anything.
Eva: I bet you will. If you make your own money, you can go to movies and restaurants and even different countries, like Mommer used to.
Kevin: I think I want to go on welfare.
—  We Need To Talk About Kevin (Page 191) by Lionel Shriver

Attention deficit disorder in a pig’s eye. Kevin was an able student when he bothered, and hadn’t been doodling, he’d been taking notes.

“Let’s see,” he said, and proceeded to check off successive elements of his list with his red crayon. “Spoiled. You’re rich. I’m not too sure what you think you’re doing without, but I bet you could afford it. Imperious. Pretty good description of that speech just now; if I was you, I wouldn’t order dessert, ‘cause you can bet the waiter’s gonna hawk a loogie in your raspberry sauce. Inarticulate? Lemme see … ” He searched the tablecloth, and read aloud, “It’s not that easy, or maybe it is easy, I don’t know. I don’t call that Shakespeare myself. Also seems to me I’m sitting across from the lady that goes on these long rants about 'reality TV’ when she’s never watched a single show. And that- one of your favorite words, Mumsey- is ignorant. Next: boasting. What was all that these-dumb fucks-suck-dead-moose-dick-and-I’m-so-much-cooler-than-them if it wasn’t showing off? Like somebody who thinks she’s got it right and nobody else does. Trusting … with no idea other people can’t stand them.” He underscored this one and then looked me in the eye with naked dislike. “Well. Far as I can tell, about the only the thing that keeps you and the other dumb-ass Americans from being peas in a pod is you’re not fat. And just because you’re skinny you act self-righteous-condescending- and superior. Maybe I’d rather have a big cow for a mother who at least didn’t think she was better than anybody else in the fucking country.”

I paid the bill. We wouldn’t conduct another mother-son outing until Claverack.

—  Page 279 (We Need To Talk About Kevin) by Lionel Shriver

I was confident that he could infer from a subtly exasperated quality in my voice when I burbled and cooed that burbling and cooing did not come naturally to me and that his precocious ear could isolate in that endless stream of placating blather an insidious, compulsive sarcasm.

[ get to know me meme | (2/5) favourite female characters | Eva Khatchadourian • We Need to Talk About Kevin ]

My mother goes somewhere else. My mother sleeps in a different bed. My mother eats different food. My mother comes home. My mother sleeps at home. My mother eats at home.

My mother tells other people to go somewhere else. Other people sleep in a different bed. Other people eat different food. Other people come home. Other people sleep at home. Other people eat at home. My mother is rich.
—  ‘Meet My Mother’ - Kevin Khatchadourian (We Need To Talk About Kevin)