Enquirer

The first person thought, ‘I’, has this peculiar property: if by enquiring 'Who am I?’ attention is focused on it in order to discover what it is, this 'I’ thought will subside. ~ Ramana Maharshi
  • things that are absolutely okay:take rainbow flags and other items to shows and other events. ask the boys to sign said rainbow items. praise them for their talents and looks in a respectful manner. openly ship the boys. speculate about the boys sexuality with your own friends in a fandom environment.
  • things that aren't okay at all:ask the boys sexuality in person. send tweets to the boys or their family/friends enquiring their sexuality. send fics to them. sexually harass the boys. bully people who take part on rainbow direction. bully shippers. bully people who like to assume the boys' sexualities on their own blog (because in the end we all do that, don't we?).

My dad passed this article along to me today:

NORTH COLLEGE HILL - Customers and workers tackled and held down a bank robber until police arrived Wednesday, according to North College Hill police.

 No one was injured, and the suspect, Michael Pryor, 38, faces two counts of robbery.

 He entered Greater Cincinnati Credit Union, 6899 Hamilton Ave., just before 10 a.m. and began pacing, police said.

He approached a teller and asked for $100 bills. When the teller denied the request, he jumped over the counter and tried to snatch the money from the teller.When that proved unsuccessful, he went to another teller window and grabbed cash from the teller’s hand that a customer had just deposited.

Police said Pryor then jumped back over the counter and attempted to flee. That’s when he was tackled by customers and workers, who held him down until police arrived.

Pryor was booked into the Hamilton County jail and is scheduled to make his first court appearance on the case Thursday morning in Hamilton County Municipal Court.” -Cincinnati Enquirer

News like this needs to be given a lot more credit. NCH, a great place to raise your kids AND you better not try to rob us. 

Will the rapture, like everything else, get here late?

The world must be ending. The Enquirer published a story (mostly) free of grammatical errors…not to mention one I’m compelled to share!

If Judgment Day is indeed Saturday, as some believe, perhaps there’s no better place to be than Cincinnati.

That’s what 31-year-old Jonathan Goolsby of Clifton figures, citing the quote often attributed to Mark Twain, but never verified: “When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Cincinnati because it’s always 20 years behind the times.”

“If the rapture does happen (Saturday), will it actually happen here in Cincinnati, or will we get a 20-year grace period while everyone else is dying?” Goolsby wondered. “I guess we’ll have to call Indianapolis or Columbus and see if they pick up.”

Either way, Goolsby is prepared. The co-host of a radio show called Salina Underground on the low-power station WVQC-FM (at 95.7 and online at www.wvqc.org), he’s preparing a two-hour “Apocalypse Wow!” radio special for 9-11 a.m. Saturday. The set list likely will include songs such as “The End” by the Doors, the protest song “Eve of Destruction” and the “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes” movie theme.

Not many Greater Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky residents - including religious leaders - seem to be counting on the rapture whisking Christians to heaven at 6 p.m. Saturday (local time in each of the world’s time zones) and the end of the world coming in October. That’s what evangelical radio broadcaster Harold Camping has predicted, after making mathematical calculations he based on the Bible, and advertised on billboards around the country, including in Cincinnati.

In fact, many are poking fun at the prediction, with radio shows, rapture-themed parties and performances and seemingly endless jokes on Twitter and Facebook, where an event called “Post rapture looting” had more than half a million people attending as of Friday afternoon (and nearly 50,000 “maybe attending”).

In Cincinnati, end-of-the-world themed parties are planned at bars including Bar Seventy-One in Symmes Township and the Northside Tavern. Presented by Queen City Cabaret, the Northside Tavern event includes a burlesque troupe called Cirque Airotic, the Faux Frenchmen gypsy jazz quartet, magician Robbin Marks, the Pickled Brothers Circus and other acts. Tickets are $10 in advance and $15 at the door for the 9 p.m. show.

“Of course, if any of the performers are raptured, the show may be shorter,” said event co-producer Travis Fessler, also general manager of the Pickled Brothers Circus.

The Cincinnati Atheists Meetup Group plans to spend Saturday night taking in a comedy show at 7:30 p.m. at Go Bananas in Montgomery, followed by an after-rapture party at 5:30 p.m. Sunday at the Washington Platform restaurant downtown. Organizer Adam Collins of Harrison said it likely won’t be the last rapture party the group will have.

“When (Camping) is wrong (Saturday), he’ll come up with another date,” he said. “It’ll give us another reason to have a good time.”

Some local religious leaders, while not necessarily planning to party Saturday, don’t believe Camping’s prediction, either.

Dan Andriacco, spokesman for the Archdiocese of Cincinnati, pointed to various Bible verses that state that no one can know exactly when Judgment Day will arrive, such as Matthew 25:13: “Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.”

“Personally, I’m making plans for beyond Saturday,” he said.

Answers in Genesis, the nonprofit ministry that built the Creation Museum in Petersburg, Ky., also cited those verses in a long written response to Camping’s predictions that is online at www.answersingenesis.org. The site calls Camping a “false prophet.”

“The Bible makes it perfectly clear that only God has perfect knowledge of the future, and this includes knowledge of the exact date of Christ’s return,” the statement says. “We are to be ready and watching, and we are to stay awake and alert, but we are not to make predictions about when it will happen.”

As for Goolsby, he’ll also be ready and watching too, just in case the rapture and any subsequent looting does take place.

“I’m definitely attending that,” he said. “I need a new turntable.”

Crucial John of Give just hooked me up with an original copy of Vic DiCara’s “Enquirer”, featuring a rare interview with Zack (that used to be on static-void I think?) as well as additional unreleased IO lyrics that I hadn’t yet transcribed from live recordings–for the songs “Unbroken” and “Deathbed”, which later became one of 108’s hits. I’ve searched for this zine for years and my hands are shaking. I’ll be scanning the entire zine and hosting it on hate5six in the near future. Stay tuned. Archiving Inside Out is my LIFE.

On May 4, the Enquirer published:

[The Sixth Street Viaduct] was not, however, Cincinnati’s worst-ranked bridge. That dubious distinction went to the Marshall Avenue bridge over Interstate 75, which the report described as one of Ohio’s two busiest deficient bridges.

Then today, they published:

[The Sixth Street Viaduct] is the city’s worst bridge, officials said, and is in dire need of repair.

Do they even bother to fact-check anything? Or do they just hand out the title of “city’s worst bridge” to a different bridge on any given day?

Although previously announced in August, it’s now official that the Cincinnati Enquirer will close its Cincinnati printing plant, laying off 200 employees, and move printing operations to the Columbus Dispatch’s plant.

Gannett, of course, glossed over these details and chose to tout the new “easy-to-use format” coming soon to the Enquirer. Although the new format will allow for more use of color, it will shrink to just 10 ½ by 14 2/3 inches.

To me, an “easy-to-use format” would consist of an improved website, RSS feeds, and perhaps a good iPhone/iPad app. Of course, these would only be relevant if I were interested in the Enquirer’s content.

The Enquirer frequently publishes anti-city attack pieces, often bordering on absurdity, in an attempt to cater to its largely suburban readership. The closure of their printing plant is another strike to a city they don’t care about and have no desire to serve.

The winning quote goes to Jake Mecklenborg:

I can’t wait for the first time I-71 is shut down by snow and no old people get their papers.