America England and Canada fighting nowadays

America: Shut up! One Direction was your fault!

England: They’re better than Justin Bieber.

America: True.

Canada: Two words. “Miley. Cyrus.”

England: Nicki Minaj.



Canada and England: AMERICA, WHAT’S GOOD???!

America: ….wow…..cut me deep.

America: I just came out to have a good time and I am feeling so attacked right now.

Canada: *starts twerking*

England: *iggy azalea noises*

America: *cri*

  • Rechive: arthur gets a new foster kid - matthew - in his house
  • Rechive: he takes him and alfred out somewhere and some lady asks matthew, while arthur is a a distance (albeit still close, but out of hearing range)
  • Rechive: "is that your daddy?"
  • Rechive: ...and matthew looks a little funny in the face
  • Rechive: then bites his lip and nods
  • Rechive: and then continues to act strange for a couple of days
  • Rechive: really strange
  • Rechive: until he gathers enough courage to tug at arthur's sleeve while they're out in the garden (alfred playing around with the neighbour's dog) and asks him all quiet, hopeful-like, "can i have another biscuit, daddy?"
  • Rechive: and arthur just
  • Rechive: "!!!!!!!!fghjkljhghjk"
  • Rechive: arthur tears up and pulls matthew into a tight hug and matthew thinks maybe he did something wrong because he saw the tears
  • Rechive: so he uses every scrap of courage he has
  • Rechive: asks "is it okay if i call you daddy?" because that is a huge thing for him
  • Rechive: and arthur is all "yes yes yes yesss you can oh sweet precious boy of course you can"
  • Rechive: and matthew nods and tears up too and whispers really quietly that he's always wanted a daddy
  • Rechive: and arthur blinks away tears and says it's always been his greatest wish to have another son
  • Rechive: so matthew starts crying and arthur starts crying and they're hugging and crying and alfred wonders wtf is up
A crackish Maple Tea idea

England visits Canada to stay for a few nights. As he was staying over, there was a lot of snow fall while they slept. Arthur wakes up all groggly, walks over to a large window and looks out. In his half sleep daze, all he could think of was, ‘What is this magical, wintery land?!’. He then starts to think that Canada is … wait for it….

Arthur: Oh, my god! Matthew! It all makes sense!!!

Matthew: W-what makes sense?

Arthur: Your winters! Your majestic landscapes! Your talking bear! The odd creatures living on your land!

Matthew: Uh… excuse me?

Arthur: You’re really Narnia! NARNIA! I-I knew there was a reason why I liked you the best. *Sheds a happy tear*

Matthew: What the MAPLE!? Did you find and eat my 'special brownies’ or something?

Arthur: Oh, Matthew. *Hugs and clings*

Matthew: ಠ_ಠ ????

“Matthew, I do not have the energy to hunt you down.” Arthur called out, wringing water from Alfred’s bath out of his cuffs. “You need to have a bath and you need to have one now.

When there was no response, he sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose. And then, waterlogged and irritable, stormed outside to look for his wayward ward who was probably wrestling with his bear outside.

“Matthew, I said–”

“Papa, look!” And immediately Arthur froze and went still, already horrified at whatever Matthew would show him. The boy only used endearments when he knew he could get into trouble. 

Arthur turned and, mouth dropping open, he stared at the boy. “Were you playing in the pond?" 

Matthew was covered head to toe in muck, weeds tangled in his curls. But he looked utterly pleased, despite the slime and mud on clothing. He was holding something tightly in his hands, against his belly, and he rocked back on his heels.

Arthur stared. Matthew opened his hands and held his prize up towards Arthur.

"I caught a frog!”

The frog, nonplussed but probably put out, croaked, its small body ballooning despite the grip Matthew had on it.

“Aren’t you proud?” Matthew asked, excited, eyes gleaming. “You were telling Alfred how many frogs you caught and killed once upon a time.” But then his face fell for a moment. “But I couldn’t kill him.”

Arthur stared for a moment longer. And then for a few minutes. Matthew started to squirm.

And then Arthur laughed, hard. He covered his mouth, trying to stifle the near hysterical laughter, but it spilled out, regardless.

Matthew made a face but Arthur knelt down and gathered the boy into his arms, uncaring of the muck now staining his clothes and the frog pressed up near his face.

“Oh you darling child.” He muttered, voice catching on a laugh, smoothing Matthew’s soaking hair. “I knew you took after me.”