INTP: ESFJ is in town and wants to hang out.

ENFP: That’s nice!

INTP: No, you don’t understand. I don’t want to hang out with anyone.

ENFP: Oh. Tell her you’re busy?

INTP: I overuse that excuse, and I’m rarely actually busy. She’ll call me out on my bs.

ENFP: Tell her you’re sick?

INTP: Even worse, she’d invite herself over to make me soup or something.

ENFP: Did you leave her on read?

INTP: No, I’m not an idiot. I never opened the message, I just checked the notification.

ENFP: Ignore it for now and let her know later that you were too busy to respond?

INTP: I would do that, but knowing her I can’t leave the house to buy food without running into her or someone she knows who is bound to report back to her, allowing her to call me out on my bs.

ENFP: I… I don’t know what to tell you. Just agree to meet up, but let her know you need to be somewhere later as an excuse to leave early?

INTP: But I don’t want to see her! Or anyone! I WANT TO BE ALONE.

ENFP: You’re always alone. A couple of hours of catching up won’t kill you.

INTP: If I ration out what food I have as of right now, I can go a week without any grocery shopping, and it significantly reduces my risks of running into her.

ENFP: Bravo, my litte introverted train wreck.

INFJ: Hey, INTP… I accidentally made plans with ESFJ, and you’re coming with me.

INTP: YOU WHAT?

ENFP: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

INFJ: I may have opened the notification by accident…

INTP: Motherfu-

INFJ: I didn’t want to leave her on read so I responded, and we talked for a bit and suddenly we’re having coffee with her on Sunday. I’m sorry, I panicked!

INTP: You are a disgrace to introverts around the world, you know that?

jamesstarlopez  asked:

Where is a good start to finding out your type, would you recommend taking a test then reading about the type you got or what are similar to that type. Should you start with functions first or start off understanding each function? The main question, how do you understand each function and how can it contribute to you in the real world?

If you’ve already taken the test, yes, read up on that type. If it fits, stop looking. If it doesn’t, read up on the similar types to see if one of them resonates better. Over-thinking is something you do not want to do, it only adds confusion.

Also, acknowledge that type is not going to explain everything you do / think / believe / want out of life, so don’t bother wondering if, “If I don’t do ____, does that mean I’m not a ____?” No, it doesn’t. Brain function, not behavior.

If you’re a total newbie, start with broad generalizations of types and then start learning about the functions. Too much function stuff at the start, especially if it’s not explained well / is too vague / generalizing will only confuse you.

Once you figure out which functions you use, you will ‘understand’ them. If you’re honest with yourself, you should be able to figure out fairly soon which functions are prominent because they are automatic and ‘drive’ you. But it takes the right cognitive function description to make you say YES, YES!! Once you know what a function does, and realize you have it, you’ll start noticing what it’s doing in your stack. (For example: ESFP. Te: “Oh, THAT’s why I feel such a desire to have something to show for my time… and why I set myself deadlines and goals even though I struggle to make them… and why I get frustrated when people want to just discuss and not SOLVE THE PROBLEM!”)

Once you know ‘em, you can start to ‘work on ‘em.’ You can find out: this is how healthy Se looks. Do I have healthy Se? Nope. Okay, so then I start doing THIS with it, instead of THAT, to make it healthier.

IE:

Healthy…

Se/Ni: opportunistic and good at pushing self / others to try new things in pursuit of a singular desired future (vs: unhealthy: reckless, never finishes anything, only thinks about today).

Ni/Se: uses futuristic impressions and insights to guide oneself toward having the motivation to make their dreams real and learns to ‘check’ impressions with evidence (vs: unhealthy: lives in fantasies and idealism with no motivation to move forward / make anything happen and/or avoids forward motion).

Ne/Si: maintains an optimistic attitude toward the future with confidence they can change direction mid-stream in pursuit of new, better ideas as they present themselves (vs: unhealthy: pessimistic, scattered, and reluctant to try new things or finish anything).

Si/Ne: meticulously collects detailed information to construct bigger, better ideas and see them through with a positive outlook toward change (vs: unhealthy: rigid refusal to try new things and/or adapt as the world shifts forward, holds on to old resentments and bad habits, and dismisses anything abstract as ‘too weird’).

Fe/Ti: makes objective judgments based on sound reasoning and uses people skills to bond others in a common goal to finish projects and accomplish tasks, while feeling comfortable sharing their emotions and resolving conflict (vs: unhealthy: manipulation of others and/or excessively judgmental attitudes, bullying behavior and venting without caring whether others are comfortable with your feelings or not).

Ti/Fe: seeks logical consistency and precision in self-expression, in order to explain their perspective so that it can benefit or educate others, with the desire of overall social betterment (vs: unhealthy: relentless criticism of everyone and everything, needless nitpicking and corrections, sometimes aimed at making others feel stupid or inferior).

Te/Fi: makes factual assessments and can organize the external world and oneself to accomplish personal goals or to achieve desired tangible results (emphasis on ‘doing’ rather than ‘analyzing’) that align with one’s deeper values and interests in life (vs: unhealthy: aggressive controlling techniques and/or steamrolling over others to accomplish tasks, using factual knowledge to shame or intimidate, and seeking success at the cost of personal relationships).

Fi/Te: allows their sense of fairness and deeply held beliefs to guide them as they make tangible plans to achieve literal results and make their desires a reality while respecting others’ independence / right to be themselves (vs: unhealthy: doing or saying whatever they want, regardless of how hurtful it can be to others, having rigid, intolerant moral judgments / refusing to associate with others with different values, and no ability to follow through on getting what they want from life).

- ENFP Mod

ENFP, Ravenclaw, Virgo, 7w6, chaotic good, male for @whatifuckwith2000

MBTI Conversation

INFJ: Oh look! A rainbow, you can see it crystal clear!

ENFP: yeaah! Wait I photograph it!

Me (ISFP) *inspired by scientific knowledge*: well, it’s just the light reflection that is separated thank to water, and it makes that effect. At the end, it’s just that, it depends on how you see it


ENFP: …

ISTP: That was my line!

INFJ: This is how to ruin a rainbow…

MBTI Types When They’re Not Thriving OR Surviving

Scl(any sort of stress/sadness)

INTJ: Super withdrawn, swings between gratification and wanting happiness, and unhealthy single-mindedness. Existential angst. Needs people’s support but rejects company. Bottles up issues and then it bursts out.

ENTJ: Prone to attack others, often over the very issues they’re insecure about. Becomes a workaholic and ignores feelings of deep dissatisfaction, or stops giving a crap about anything. 

INFJ: Despairs of all things, just can’t see The Point of it. Goes through days mechanically, without purpose. Resists all help, considering it to be probing. Can’t get anything done. 

ENFJ: Laughs a bit too loudly and smiles a bit too widely. Escapes to private places, but feels lost. Tells their problems to someone close to them, but doesn’t accept any advice.

INFP: Isolate, isolate isolate. Sees the negative in everything and can’t see others’ love/affection for them. Loses their ‘purpose’ and drive, can’t find meaning in anything. Idealizes what they can’t have. Perpetual self-pity-party. 

ENFP: Super excitable, overdoes everything. Cannot focus at all, and their own emotions/reactions are out of their control. Breaks down sobbing. Unwilling to actually move forward. 

ISFP: Mull around in their own feelings, hates the world around them, because it’s failed them. Spiraling moodiness, “what ifs,” “should’ve done this,” but no one will ever see that. They themselves won’t admit it.

ESFP: Unusually critical, closed-minded, and overly concerned with matters of appearance over substance. Terrible sense of logic, yet argumentative all the same. Delves into the physical world in order to escape their mental one. 

ISTJ: Scattered mind, unable to think coherently. Becomes judgmental and passive-aggressive. Super pessimistic, takes on a me vs. the world mentality.

ESTJ: Intensely prickly, will take offense at anything but prefers to strike first and strike hard. If you hit a nerve, they’ll cut you out of their lives (for the time being). Tries to act happy and in control, but actually really moody. 

ISFJ: Withdrawn, tries to please everyone but is really passive-aggressive about it. Takes on a martyr complex. Refuses help while throwing a pity party because “no one cares about them.” 

ESFJ: Seeks control of people and surroundings, bossy and irritable. Might manipulate others into feeling bad, too. Denies that they’re the problem. 

INTP: Makes a lot of jokes about how things aren’t okay, but aggressively resists anyone’s sincere attention. Turns flat and emotionless, takes compartmentalizing to an unhealthy extreme. 

ENTP: Scatterbrained, cannot focus. Swings between extremes of emotions, but makes a point to show a falsely sanguine face to people. Feels like they’re crumbling from the inside. 

ISTP: Compulsive and reckless. Has a “screw this” attitude and pushes away actual problems. May or may not confide in people, but too down to take any advice. 

ESTP: Use bravado and ‘self-confidence’ to mask their insecurities. Get a rush from attention, whether it’s positive or negative, and thus seek it out. Obsessive mentality, particularly concerning negative outcomes.

the types as things Albus Severus should've been named

I’m back after hiatus to shitpost in honor of July 31st & resurrect some old memes yay

ISFJ

INFP

ESFJ

ESFP

ENFJ 

INFJ

ESTP

ISTP

INTP

ENTP

ENFP

ENTJ 

ISFP

I STJ

INTJ

ESTJ

the types as bitches i hate in college and also ive had a lot of wine

ESFJ: that social butterfly bitch that doesn’t understand anything ever without asking twelve clarifying questions before you can explain shit, like i was gonna explain that obvious feature of your new iphone in four seconds chris, how about you chill and stop acting like IM the weird one

ISFJ: that boring nice bitch who has probably never had a unique individual thought in their life. they’re like, solely reactionary beings, the true wobbuffets of real life.

ESFP: that crazy bitch whose super weird but everybody likes because theyre just weird enough to be likable but never hangs out with you consistently because theyre too involved with theatre or ecstasy or some shit idk

ISFP: that sarcastic bitch whose somehow still obsessed with fandoms and superwholock and probably owns a horse back home or something

ENFJ: that starry eyed bitch who loves everybody and wants to save the world or some shit, idk, my eyes glazed over a quarter way through your monologue; besides, it all just pans out to you feeling bad about yourself because you can’t live up to the impossible standards you set for yourself anyways so am i really missing anything???

INFJ: that passive aggressive bitch whos always gotta remind you that they’re the most rare mbti type, and act all ethereal and distant and shit when we all know ur a dime a dozen on a college campus anyways

ENFP: that emotionally dead bitch who convinces everybody that theyre not because theyre so enthusiastic and tells you their whole life story the first time you meet them to cause shock and awe but also to get you lowkey emotionally attached

INFP: that sensitive bitch who wants to be a writer or an artist or something but is too obsessed with memes to get very far 

ESTJ: that polysci bitch who runs for class president when everybody knows damn well you don’t do any real anything on campus and the dean regards you with as much contempt as i do

ISTJ: that awkward bitch who knows they’re not that fun so they try really hard to put themselves out there and just makes it awkward and weird for the whole party

ESTP: that loud bitch who gotta be the center of attention all the time and everybody likes for some reason

ISTP: that angry bitch whose a wannabe sociopath and always telling you how much they hate people and want to murder people for, like, literally no reason like calm down edgelord tom.

ENTJ: that problematic bitch who starts shit right at the end of class because success and proving that they know shit is the only thing that makes them feel anything anymore

INTJ: that condescending sarcastic ass bitch that rolls their eyes whenever somebody raises their hand and is probably one dumb question away from bringing a gun to school

ENTP: that annoying bitch who starts arguments in class with everybody because they think its fun or wanna prove they know useless knowledge or logic or some shit idk stanley and idc just stop arguing with the professor its psych 101 and i want to go home

INTP: that quiet bitch who spends the whole party looking around in the corner and asking their friend if they can leave yet and only talks during class to explain something semi useless and tangental to the topic at hand 

The Types Reacting to an Insult

Tells them to shut up: ESTP, ISTP, ESTJ, ISTJ

Backlashes with perfect comeback: ENTP, INTJ

Takes it as a personal attack: ISFP, INFP, ENTJ

Apologizes for some reason: ISFJ, INFJ, ENFJ,

Will probably cry: ESFJ, ESFP, ENFP

Laughs and agrees: INTP

The MBTI Types as Flowers

ESFP–Sunflower: loves the spotlight of a good sunbeam; can often be seen enjoy open fields on dreamy summer road trips; enjoys dancing along with others to the movement of the sun.

ESTP–Thistle: colorful and hardy; can thrive in the most challenging and unusual places; tends to take over a bit sometimes; adventurous.

ISFP–Baby’s Breath: sweet, soft, and airy; brightens any bouquet with a gentle artistic touch; classically creative.

ISTP–Dandelion: knows how to grow and thrive even through sidewalk cracks; not terribly picky; very persistent; enjoys a good thrill; adaptive to many environments.

ENFP–Forget-me-nots: very bright and unforgettable personalities; will really cling to you and very much appreciates your lasting company; sweet, hardy, and colorful enough to light up an entire forest floor.

ENTP–Foxglove: lovely, bright, and entertaining; outgoing and colorful; has a darker side as well which earned it names like “dead man’s bells” and “witch’s gloves”; enjoy its company but be careful as well.

INFP–Daisy: free spirits that happily crown the head of an independent mind; sweet yet strong; not easily contained to a determined place to grow.

INTP–Cornflower: a modest yet bright blue flower; was long considered a weed but now has many interesting and admirable uses including in cooking, fine tea blends, and dyes.

ESFJ–Rose: classic and knows how to please; often associated with good social interactions; traditional and timeless.

ESTJ–Magnolia: dominates the are it’s in; commands attention; knows how to delight with lovely fragrances.

ISFJ–Wild Rose: sweet and delicate; does have thorns despite gentle appearance; modest yet lights up a forest.

ISTJ–Jasmine: small yet strong; knows how to command your attention with wonderful perfumes; not extravagant yet lovely and very pleasing.

ENFJ–Orchid: needs just the right kind of care in order to thrive; elegant and sophisticated; classic and a good crowd-pleaser.

ENTJ–Amaryllis: blooms when the time is high for gifts and a center table place surrounded by many decorations is likely; not frilly; commanding.

INFJ–African Violet: delicate and sweet; small yet brings great beauty to any place, natural or not; can be quite picky about getting just the right kind of care, but if you treat it well, it will give you its all.

INTJ–Night-blooming Cereus: lovely but only opens up one night a year; elusive and enjoys the quiet of the night; is very rare but a wonderful sight to those who are lucky enough to witness a full bloom.

“I love you, but you just make me so sad.” She whispered quietly enough to not wake him.

“And I so badly want to go back to the way things were, but every time I look at you now I feel little edges of my heart cracking apart.”

She kisses his chest with the next words, “I love you, but I have to love myself now.”

Myers Briggs Types by Whether You Should Fight Them

ENFJ: Fight them, when the occasion calls for it. You will win, but only if you keep your emotions out of it. Where there are emotions, they have the power.

ENFP: FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING WHY WOULD YOU FIGHT THEM??? Honestly their INT-x friends will kill you anyway, so back off.

INFJ: They are so pure, sometimes you will want to fight them, just to shake things up. But they are frustratingly dense in their goodness and won’t realize what you’re doing. They will probably try to comfort you as though you are the one who was fought.

INFP: Don’t. They’re soft and smol and you will feel bad about it afterwards.

ESFJ: Don’t even–just leave them. Leave them to themselves, and the worlds they have chosen to aggressively care for.

ESFP: You will die, but it will be worth it. Someone has to fight them. Someone has to stop them. But it’s like fighting the sun, so you will definitely die.

ISFP: Why would you fight them? Like the INFJ, they will not know what you are doing. They will laugh and send you memes instead, but kindly.

ISFJ: Sometimes you will want to, but you should not. They just want to garden in one way or another, so just hand them a rake and go find yourself an ESTP.

ESTJ: Fight them. Dear God, fight them. They are combative but unimaginative, and must be crushed.

ESTP: Trust me, you’ve already fought one.

ISTP: Ehh, don’t bother. They are unreadable and elusive. They are probably causing others to lowkey suffer, but it’s just not worth your time.

ISTJ: No. Do not fight them. You will lose. They are organized, efficient, and tireless. Fighting them will end in death by a thousand precise cuts.

ENTJ: You will want to fight them, and you should. But approach with care. They are the generals of society and will destroy you and your whole family if given an opportunity. Consult an INTJ.

ENTP: They can and must be fought. Prepare yourself; they are wily and full of memes, and they play dirty. Wait for them to prematurely triumph and go in for the kill-stroke.

INTP: You will want to fight them, but you will not know how.

INTJ: You fool.

Unexpected Aspects of the Types

ENFP: They actually crave schedules and structure like nobodies business, if and only if it revolves around their passions. 

INFP: The “manic pixie dream girl” stigma is so wrong. 90% of them are more along the lines of “embittered memelords” with a splash of off-beat and sensible fashion. 

INTP: They’re actually excellent in social situations that they throw themselves into. Your odd aggressiveness and shouting is amusing and weirdly charismatic. 

ENTP: You’ll have to murder them a thousand times before they’ll admit that they actually DO crave harmony and peace more than chaos; Debate and verbal jousting (and memes) is just their way of getting there. 

ENFJ: The worst time management skills. Worse than all of the P’s put together, bar none. You got stars in your eyes and not a single “no” in your throats and it often leaves you ragged busybodies from over committing yourselves. 

INFJ: Despite their ‘mysterious and secretive nature’ stigma, if you engage them in a deep conversation about their passions, 9 times out of 10 they will splay their soul to you even though you met 5 minutes ago at a college party.

ISFJ: They’re known for being the kindly, grandmotherly type that just wants the best for their friends, but the flip side is they’re all basic bitches that secretly crave being a tool. They’re usually just too nice to go Full Douche™, praise the Lord. 

ESFJ: Despite being known as the social butterfly, the Fe and Si combination sometimes makes for an extremely judgmental, polarizing, and single-minded personality, and can seem like the most socially inept/oblivious person in the room. 

ESTJ: Weirdly enough, more often than not, they’re one of the most socially graceful and self-aware people in the room. That, or they’re utterly cringeworthy. Not really any in between. Just don’t get them started on politics (I’m begging you). 

ISTJ: Despite the ‘emotionless Traditionalist™ robot’ stigma, although they can’t offer consistent emotional output, all of the ones I’ve met are some of the most emotionally stable, mature, and available people I’ve ever met. 

ENTJ: Your responsible, efficient, and commanding CEO of a friend is actually the biggest procrastinator in the game, bar none. It’s hidden under a few hundred layers of self-confidence, but they need the stress of the last minute to feel anything in this world. 

INTJ: Massive internal war between fearless, emotionless sociopathy, and caring so deeply for a select few people that they’d give up every ambition to follow them to the ends of the earth without a single plan. TL;DR, their black and icy hearts are secretly hearts of gold and they absolutely abhor that about themselves. 

ESFP: Your favorite quick-talking, loud-mouthed, social explosion with all the friends is probably pretty lonely on the inside. Almost every ESFP I’ve met has huge commitment issues (big and pretty accurate stereotype), but few people realize it usually comes from self-knowledge of their sporadic nature, and they keep people at an emotional distance as a result, so they don’t end up getting hurt. Advice: letting people in and trying to make it work is infinitely better than loneliness in a crowd. 

ISFP: The EXTJ’s WISH they could be as soul-crushingly terrifying as your favorite superwholockian, equestrian painter friend when somebody’s crossed their family or friends. 

ESTP: The “sex, drugs, drinking, and more sex” cliche with ESTP’s is so dumb because literally every ESTP I know doesn’t care about alcohol or sex more than any other person I’ve met, but they ARE infinitely more obsessed with ultimate frisbee and bridge jumping. 

ISTP: The calm, rational, logical side of Ti is thrown completely out of the driver’s side window when they’re behind the wheel, because these hoes have the worst road rage I’ve ever seen, without exception.