we’ve all heard of the fake dating trope… but have u considered.. fake exes trope…..

  • ‘my new romance-obsessed friend asked me who my last date was with and i was too embarrassed to say i’ve never been on a date so i blurted your name and it turns out they know you’ au
  • ‘i didn’t want to tell my friend who my real date last night was so i just pointed at a random stranger (you) but now they’re storming over to interrogate you and you’re playing along??? okay’ au
  • ‘a mutual friend tried to introduce us, but we already knew each other from LARPing but we’re both too embarrassed to admit that so i jokingly said we used to date and oh god now our friend wont stop interrogating us about it’ au
  • ‘im egging your house for a dare but your parent is a cop and they’re yelling at me so i told them that you were my ex and you wronged me and now you’re coming outside and please go along with this i don’t want to go to jail’ au
  • ‘my current partner is a huge asshole and i need a reason to break up with them so will you pretend to be my possessive and violent ex’ au
  • ‘we’re contestants on a reality show and we kind of hate each other so the producers told us to pretend to be warring exes for the ratings so now we keep inventing crazier and crazier things the other did while we were dating’ au

anonymous asked:

Okay but if Holtz was a foster kid then imagine them pulling up to a house for a bust and Holtz just freezes because it's one of the houses she was mistreated in. And she shuts down and won't talk so Erin takes her home whilst the others complete the bust. Later when Holtz finally tells them what's wrong, Abby and Patty go back in the night and egg the house.

um!!! yes. when abby and patty get back with like egg shells sticking to their clothes erin is the mum friend being like “and exactly WHERE have u two been” and abby has to reluctantly say “um we MAY have or may not have egged a house” erin: “….you’re both over the age of 40″ patty: “there is no age limit to fun, MUM” erin just rolling her eyes but then quickly asking “wait do u have anymore cause holtz is still really sad and-” abby: “say no more” 

a fun friday night of erin patty and abby egging the house and tee-peing it for holtz!! 

Every Letter (8/10)

Summary: A pen pal writing assignment connects a young Emma Swan with her best friend Killian Jones. Life sends many hardships their way, but their friendship remains solid through the years. As they both grow older and begin to realize what they want out of life, will their letters be enough? (On AO3.)
Rating: T
Word count: ~9500
Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6 - Ch7 - Ch8 - Ch9 - Ch10

Emma was frustrated, in more ways than one.

There was the regular frustration that came with the job of sheriff. Several people had had their houses egged and TP’d the past week and a half, and while Emma and David were both fairly certain that it was just a couple of high school kids acting up, no one had seen the perpetrators. And Emma was pretty sick of spending hours helping families remove hundreds of feet of toilet paper from their roofs and trees. She wasn’t frail by any means, but her back and shoulders ached with all the reaching. When they caught those damn kids, she was going to give them hell. Maybe let them spend a night or two in a cell to scare them straight. Or worse, put them to work on cleaning the school bathrooms. She relished in the thought of how she could punish the brats.

There was the mentally exhausting frustration that came from Walsh’s constant hovering. She’d skipped out on just a few dates with him and suddenly it was like he was clinging to her that much harder. And maybe part of that had to do with the fact that two weeks earlier she had told him point blank that Killian would be living with her and he had no say in the matter, but still… Endless texts, calls when she was in the middle of work, surprise visits during her lunch hour. One of those times, Killian had been seated across from her at her desk and they were eating Granny’s takeout, and without asking, he pulled up a chair and joined them. It had been a very awkward and uncomfortable experience for everyone.

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‘im egging your house for a dare but your parent is a cop and they’re yelling at me so i told them that you were my ex and you wronged me and now you’re coming outside and please go along with this i don’t want to go to jail’ au + Andreil

The carton of eggs staining the grass and the deer in the head lights look on the teenage boy’s face was enough for even a moron to put two and two together.

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the fact that the Williams boys are old guys instead of like, twelve years old like everyone assumed, is somehow unsurprising, and also hilarious.

imagine two middle aged men egging a house and then running from the cops in the middle of the night.

diabolikloversgenderbend  asked:

Could I have 24, 29, 37, 38 and 47 for Kanato please c: Btw, I love your blog and all your theories, I think they're really well thought out and I praise and respect you so much for them. OwO

24. Is there one subject of study that they excel at? Or do they even care about intellectual pursuits at all?

Kanato doesn’t give two shits about school but he is surprisingly good at art and has a fun time in the class since what is usually considered disturbing can be passed off as “creative interpretation.” He likes to paint, he likes to draw and although he can’t draw exceptionally well, he is able to express himself much better when he’s in art class.

29. Reaction to sudden extrapersonal disaster (eg The house is on fire! What do they do?)

If the house was on fire he was probably the one who set the place up. For disasters like that he doesn’t really get phased by them unless Teddy is in danger but that’s more of an intrapersonal disaster for him.

37. Are they more analytical or more emotional in their decision-making?

Kanato is a very emotional decision maker and that in itself is extremely dangerous.

38. Would they consider themselves a Type A or Type B personality?

He’d say what the fuck is a Type A personality and leave. (But he’s a total Type A).

47. If they were to fall in love, who (or what) is their ideal?

Answered here

Eggs and Dates

read it on the AO3 at

by superallens

Len gets caught egging Barry’s house and has to come up with a lie- fast.

Words: 965, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 2 of ColdFlash One Shots

read it on the AO3 at
I Darn Fucked Up

read it on the AO3 at

by enddread

‘im egging your house for a dare but your parent is a cop and they’re yelling at me so i told them that you were my ex and you wronged me and now you’re coming outside and please go along with this i don’t want to go to jail’ au + Andreil

Words: 689, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

read it on the AO3 at

anonymous asked:

Tim and Dally totally go around on Halloween harassing people lmao Angela would totally find someone she likes, friend or romantically whatever, but the minute she finds out they were born in December she drops them like garbage. She is done with them, will not associate with them AT ALL. Honestly wouldn't mind dedicating my life to Curly bc who else will make him top priority in their life?? Not Tim that's for sure jk he does need someone to just be like "curly no" and he ofc be like "curly yes

God yes, Tim and Dally are egging and tping houses all night. They’re so drunk lmao. Angela would so break up with a guy for daring to be born in HER month
We gotta form like a protection squad for lil baby Curly