Don't Trust the B---- in Apt 23

Don’t Trust the B— in Apt. 23 starter sentences

season 1, part 1 of 2
episodes 1 through 4
70 starters
feel free to change gender pronouns
content warning: alcohol mention, cussing, drug mention, sexual themes

  • “Living in [city name] has taught me that life is full of surprises.”
  • “I knew this was going to happen.”
  • “I have to take a picture. I have to show my parents. They’re not gonna believe this.”
  • “I made a giraffe out of pipe cleaners.”
  • “It’s like you’re inside my mind.”
  • “A little advice—adopt a looting mentality.”
  • “You’re never gonna use that, _____!”
  • “I have a plan, too, and it does not involve me going home and telling my family that I’m a failure.”
  • “I mean, this bad luck cannot last forever.”
  • “We may or may not become lovers. That’s… up to you.”
  • “We weren’t really compatible genitally. Imagine trying to fit a cucumber into a coin purse.”
  • “Come here, I’m trying to help you! This is important information!”
  • “Don’t trust the bitch in apartment 23.”
  • “Woah! Woah, hey! I can see your no-nos!”
  • “I was gonna help you, but then I didn’t want to.”
  • “She sort of warned me not to… trust you.”
  • “Ugh, get off me. Go to sleep.”
  • “Uh… I’d kind of like to be alone.”
  • “I have a long-standing sexual history with that tub.”
  • “So… you’re saying that you stole from me?”
  • “And you really don’t feel bad at all?”
  • “You’ve surprised me, and I’m rarely surprised.”
  • “How’s it feel being on the short end of the stick?”
  • “You want a spanking, _____?”
  • “I can’t believe you! Just—just stay the hell out of my life!”
  • “Anyone wanna get weird and play Mario Kart?”
  • “Hey, you know what’s fun? Alcohol.”
  • “That is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.”
  • “I think that genuine emotion just sometimes makes me feel uncomfortable.”
  • “I believe there are two ways to look at any situation. You can focus on the bad, or choose to see the good.”
  • “_____, you can’t plan your life. You have to leave room for new experiences.”
  • “You know, if you wanna meet a guy, I can hook you up. I know someone who would be perfect for you.”
  • “Yeah, I—I—I don’t… trust you with anything… ever.”
  • “Not everything has to be a competition, _____.”
  • “Hi! We’re having a party for no reason.”
  • “This guy is hot, but boring. It’s like, dude, stop telling me about your eBay feedback score.”
  • “I can listen to you talk forever.”
  • “You are such a good listener. That is so hot.”
  • “I’m tired of people trying to pigeonhole me.”
  • “Oh, hey, a stuffed animal from a much older man. Nothing weird about that.”
  • “This might sound cheesy, but I think you might be my soulmate.”
  • “Don’t fall for it. It’s an act. She’s a total drama queen.”
  • “I think I’ve ruined everything!”
  • “You never think things through, _____.”
  • “Just because this isn’t in your life plan doesn’t mean this isn’t exactly where you’re supposed to be.”
  • “Do you not see a pattern here? You see something that you want, and then you abandon it because you get bored or because you’re too selfish to care about anyone else!”
  • “Okay, _____, this is insane. This is beyond irresponsible.”
  • “You need to commit to this. You are either in or you are out, _____.”
  • “Your breath smells when you yell.”
  • “Wow. For once, you cleaned up your own mess.”
  • “Eating your lunch for tomorrow. I love that you’re not afraid of cheese.”
  • “I’m not weak. You’re weak.”
  • “Oh, don’t bother. I already ate all the pills from underneath the couch.”
  • “I can’t believe how stupid I was.”
  • “These shoes are, like, the best thing going on in my life right now.”
  • “It’s not what you do, it’s how you do it.”
  • “_____, I’m gonna take you out and teach you how to be badass.”
  • “If you have the right attitude, you can do anything and go anywhere.”
  • “Morning. I’d offer you breakfast, but you didn’t make any.”
  • “I thought it was just gonna be us tonight. Bringing somebody else in—it messes up our dynamic.”
  • “I’m so sorry. I tried to shut down the internet, but it’s bigger than me.”
  • “How dare you talk about me like I’m not here!”
  • “That’s great. You’re actually kind of a normal person outside of your apartment.”
  • “I’m layered, _____, like an onion. A sexy, sexy onion.”
  • “I said I could, I didn’t say I would. Semantics.”
  • “So, you’re okay with me being here? You’re not gonna freak out?”
  • “Um… Does this mean we can be friends?”
  • “He called you boring? Dude, that’s, like, the worst thing you can say to someone.”
  • “This party’s beat. Let’s bounce.”
  • “Nope. No. No! Find another way to express that.”