You’re not worth the millions of tears I’ve cried till I felt my eyes may almost bleed.

You’re not worth the countless times I’ve cried myself to sleep.

You’re not worth the excruciating heartache I live through each day.

You’re not worth the suffocating grief I feel each time I see my empty bed.

You’re not worth the sorrow that’s become my constant companion since you left.

You’re not worth the unconditional love that I showered you with all those years.

You’re not worth all those years I patiently waited for you.

You’re not worth all those prayers I said daily to ensure you were safe and sound.

You’re not worth all the times I kept you alive in all my thoughts.

You’re not worth to be loved but I fell for you and loved you anyway.

You’re not worth any space in my heart but you’re the one who occupies it till this day.

Why should I care about you,
when tears and pain
was all I got from you.

Why should I trust you,
when lies and half truths
are all I got from you.

Why should I love you,
when love is not a concept
understood by you?

Why should I wait for you,
when the only thing I’ll get is
more heartache if I wait for you.

Why should I not love someone else,
when it’s obvious that
everyone loves me except you.

dear diary,

Hux accused me of eating all the chocolate ice cream on base even though it wouldn’t even be possible since I am lactose intolerant and also, how would I shove all that ice cream through my mouth vents? Thats just stupid.

Hux’s shitty dad is visiting the base this week to inspect stuff I guess which sucks for me because I hate him more than I hate smaller Hux AND my dad so you know its real bad. do you think I could get away with stabbing Hux’s dad too? I think it would be beneficial to the order