DAIN

X-ray image of a rose, below, that was created by Dain Tasker in 1936. Tasker was the chief radiologist at Wilshire Hospital in Los Angeles, California, in the early days of radiology. He used fine-focus X-ray tubes to create ghostly black-and-white prints of flowers on X-ray film. The images were a hit in photography circles in the late 1930s and were published in high-profile art magazines, although his work fell into obscurity and was only rediscovered relatively recently.

some thoughts about middle earth
  • elves and dwarves are so confused by men’s gendering?? in both elf and dwarf cultures your gender and physical sex is completely seperate, so when they see a human baby and the parents are like, “yep, this our son, he’s a boy,” the elves and dwarves are so confused?? becaue the child hasn’t gotten a chance to decide for themselves??
  • elf and dwarf children get to feel out different genders until they feel comfortable to call themselves that gender. even then, theyre free to change it later on if they want
  • (aragorn was raised as an elf and therefore also went through this process. he tried out being a girl for a few years, then agender, and eventually decided on calling himself a boy. elrond was super proud)
  • it’s easy to tell with dwarves, bc they have special braids/beads for their gender
  • elves generally ask each other if theyre unsure, bc theyre deathly afraid of making assumptions, since thats like a really big insult
  • elves and dwarves each have very distinct body shapes. its difficult to differentiate between a (physically) female or male dwarf and between a (physically) female or male elf, which is great bc it means the humans cant just assume their gender
  • they dont really gender jobs (eg the woman cant be a guard or the man cant be a cook) bc thats not how elf/dwarf gender works?? theyre like the epitome of gender equality
  • (so dis was actually before dain in succession to the throne of erebor, but she decided to let him rule bc she had just lost the last of her remaining family)
  • elves are usually pansexual
  • dwarves are usually demisexual
  • hobbits are a mix, generally bi or pan, and occasionally polyamorous (theyre very free with their love)
  • humans are the very old school race, heterosexuality is generally preferred bc you can have a baby (theyre still very “a Woman is a Woman and a Man is a Man”). if youre looking for a pretty bigoted race, this is it
  • race (ie the colour of your skin) is not a big thing?? i mean youve got halflings and orcs and talking ravens and shit walking around??
  •  the elves occasionally have this thing about heritage, but its still more about blood (like Noldor or Sinda or w/e) than physical attributes
  • that being said, most dwarves are def poc
  • i mean, they were created in the image of aule and dont even think about telling me he was white
  • also?? hobbits are a farming and gardening race?? they spend the whole day out in the sun, working?? they are not white fam
  • elrond is also not the straight-haired, pale bitch peter jackson showed us?? um dude he was related to like half of beleriand (part of middle earth that got flooded before lotr) and despite what peter jackson tells us, not every fucking elf and human is white jesus fucking christ
Imagine being one of those people that can talk for hours without divulging any information about themselves, and it takes the company ten months to figure out that they know literally nothing about you

Dain :Thorin, I wish to know more about my future cousin-in-law what can you tell me about her?
Thorin : uh, she’s kind, and funny, and smart
Dain : yes, but what are her interests?
Thorin :* looking to Dwalin and his nephews for back up. Only to see that they are just as lost as he is* somebody go get me my wife!

4

Dain’s nicknames for Thranduil and his army

8

False Advertising: ensemble

Point being, just about anybody would’ve made more sense than Legolas in fighting Bolg. Okay, Alfrid is worse; zombie-Smaug is worse; Galadriel or Saruman are worse; Gandalf is … comparable? But I’m pretty sure that if Bolg had tripped over Bilbo’s unconscious body and impaled himself on his own pointy armor, it would have been more satisfying than what we got with Legolas.

I cannot comprehend what they were thinking. 

(Actually, putting Bolg down in Dale to be killed by Beorn or Dain works really well.)