Charlie

The last three years have been one hell of a ride. A lot can change in three years. When I first started this blog almost every single thing about my life and internet life in general was different. Charlie wasn’t here yet and I wanted to make a big spectacle of it. That was part of a larger complex I was dealing with at the time. Everything had to be a show, even my own name wasn’t real. But despite all the mistakes I have made I think I had one saving grace and that was my love and excitement to be a father. I’m not part of the same family I was back when I started this journey, hell, I don’t think many of you are even aware of half of what has happened. I just wanted to share my thoughts and my experience with being a dad to a group of people that I know have love and care about me and charlie and our story.

In the last three years I lost my fiancee, lost my baby, and a whole lot more. The first year I spent without seeing my daughter was the hardest. I tried my best to be good enough for her, for my fiancee, and for everyone around me and everything sorta came crashing down and I had to reevaluate who I was and who I wanted to be for the future. I’m going to skip a lot of the boring details but here I am, 2016, healthy, both emotionally and physically after dropping a massive 180 pounds and as it stands it looks like I will be holding sole custody of my daughter and nothing in this world makes me happier.

She’s been with me for the past year and a half now, I’ve done my best to refocus my life and my desires into giving her the best life possible and being the best dad possible for her. But hey, pictures are worth a thousand words so I’ll leave you guys with some pictures and just a friendly reminder that just because everything is going bad doesn’t mean everything is going to stay bad forever.